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I just threw up

Captain KCaptain K Registered User regular
edited December 2008 in Social Entropy++
I inhaled a piece of lint by accident, coughed and swallowed it involuntarily, and suddenly I was puking.


what bodily functions have caught you by surprise lately, SE++?

Captain K on
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Posts

  • Dr. FrenchensteinDr. Frenchenstein Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    i farted in a bar, and holy lord. i did not expect the stench b/c usually mine don't stink.

  • iStevoiStevo Registered User
    edited December 2008
    I was just on a call at work for like an hour and a half and I had to piss so hard the whole time.

    ...I'm so hip, I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.
  • AshcroftAshcroft Gimme dem Yens Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I was picking my nose, and a 3 inch hair came out with the crusty snot.

    foxs1.png
  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    cHICO TOUCHED MY PEENER AND IT STARTED LEEKING WHITE OUT :(

    ETqXK.png
  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    sadly, i have had no recent surprise bodily functions.

    closest i can come is the friend of a friend who shit himself with diarrhea on xmas day right as he got pulled over by a cop

    nipplessig.jpg
  • CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    iStevo wrote: »
    I was just on a call at work for like an hour and a half and I had to piss so hard the whole time.
    That could be a urinary tract infection.

    tonksigblack.png
  • Captain KCaptain K Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Houk wrote: »
    sadly, i have had no recent surprise bodily functions.

    closest i can come is the friend of a friend who shit himself with diarrhea on xmas day right as he got pulled over by a cop

    this is legendary

  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Captain K wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    sadly, i have had no recent surprise bodily functions.

    closest i can come is the friend of a friend who shit himself with diarrhea on xmas day right as he got pulled over by a cop

    this is legendary
    to me, the worst part is not the moment of shitting, but the time he had to spend sitting, driving, and walking to his apartment covered in his own leaky shit

    nipplessig.jpg
  • Peter EbelPeter Ebel Deus Vult! OsloRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I once inhaled some pine tree thing while I was out running. I coughed so hard I puked.

    Fuck off and die.
  • Skull ManSkull Man Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I'm home sick today. Spewing outta both ends.

  • TheidarTheidar Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Captain K wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    sadly, i have had no recent surprise bodily functions.

    closest i can come is the friend of a friend who shit himself with diarrhea on xmas day right as he got pulled over by a cop

    this is legendary

    That's one way to try and get out of a ticket.

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  • Dr. FrenchensteinDr. Frenchenstein Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Houk wrote: »
    Captain K wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    sadly, i have had no recent surprise bodily functions.

    closest i can come is the friend of a friend who shit himself with diarrhea on xmas day right as he got pulled over by a cop

    this is legendary
    to me, the worst part is not the moment of shitting, but the time he had to spend sitting, driving, and walking to his apartment covered in his own leaky shit

    I think i would have burned that car, and called my insurance company.

  • Sara LynnSara Lynn Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
  • scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Captain K wrote: »
    I inhaled a piece of lint by accident, coughed and swallowed it involuntarily, and suddenly I was puking.


    what bodily functions have caught you by surprise lately, SE++?

    haha what the fuck?

    japsig.jpg
  • Peter EbelPeter Ebel Deus Vult! OsloRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    What if menstruation was high pressure?

    PSSSSSSSSHHHHHT!

    Fuck off and die.
  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Theidar wrote: »
    Captain K wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    sadly, i have had no recent surprise bodily functions.

    closest i can come is the friend of a friend who shit himself with diarrhea on xmas day right as he got pulled over by a cop

    this is legendary

    That's one way to try and get out of a ticket.
    yeah, actually it worked.

    when he rolled down the window the cop immediately started to wretch and motioned for him to just get out of there.

    if i'd been the cop i probably would have shot him just on principle

    nipplessig.jpg
  • WetsunWetsun Registered User
    edited December 2008
    Had to pee while driving back from NC to MD last night. So my fiancee helped me pee in a 20oz soda bottle (also we were both chugging the bottle right before since it wasn't very empty) while doing 65 on the I-95 HOV lane.

    After I was done, the bottle was at least a good 80% full of urine...which makes me really glad that we made sure to finish the soda before I started.

    XBL/Steam: Wetsun
  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    i could never ever start pissing into a bottle because im eternally afraid it wouldnt be enough

    and what then?

    nipplessig.jpg
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Peter Ebel wrote: »
    What if menstruation was high pressure?

    PSSSSSSSSHHHHHT!
    that would be better

    as it stands now it's kind of sinister

    kQwcZLJ.png
  • Bad-BeatBad-Beat Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I was in GAME once and I let out the best fart.

    I thought it was silent and was walking around all smug as fuck.

    Turns out it was pretty loud, I hadn't realised but everyone else in the shop had and was blissfully unaware of their bewildered glances.

  • BalefuegoBalefuego Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I accidently swallowed seawater once

    that did not stay down very long

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Sara LynnSara Lynn Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Peter Ebel wrote: »
    What if menstruation was high pressure?

    PSSSSSSSSHHHHHT!
    that would be better

    as it stands now it's kind of sinister

    yeah I'm gonna vote to agree on this one

    just get all over with and let me pass out for like a day due to blood loss and then wake up and go about my life

  • scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Peter Ebel wrote: »
    What if menstruation was high pressure?

    PSSSSSSSSHHHHHT!

    We should get our hands on a video of a woman menstruating over time then speed it up super fast.

    japsig.jpg
  • WetsunWetsun Registered User
    edited December 2008
    Houk wrote: »
    i could never ever start pissing into a bottle because im eternally afraid it wouldnt be enough

    and what then?

    Well, I would still be relieved if I drained 20oz out of my bladder...stopping sucks, but it's better than holding everything in. I was mostly worried because it was dark and I couldn't see how full it was. But damn, 16+ oz is still a decent bottle of pee.

    XBL/Steam: Wetsun
  • bowenbowen Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Wetsun wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    i could never ever start pissing into a bottle because im eternally afraid it wouldnt be enough

    and what then?

    Well, I would still be relieved if I drained 20oz out of my bladder...stopping sucks, but it's better than holding everything in. I was mostly worried because it was dark and I couldn't see how full it was. But damn, 16+ oz is still a decent bottle of pee.

    There's a variably large amount of men who cannot stop pissing once they start. So yes, you can be relieved it's not in you anymore, but would you be relieved that it's all over your pants, feet, car?

  • DruhimDruhim Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2008
    I once suffered from completely unexpected diarrhea about half an hour into a hike with a female friend. She was surprisingly chill about the whole thing.

    belruelotterav-1.jpg
  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    bowen wrote: »
    Wetsun wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    i could never ever start pissing into a bottle because im eternally afraid it wouldnt be enough

    and what then?

    Well, I would still be relieved if I drained 20oz out of my bladder...stopping sucks, but it's better than holding everything in. I was mostly worried because it was dark and I couldn't see how full it was. But damn, 16+ oz is still a decent bottle of pee.

    There's a variably large amount of men who cannot stop pissing once they start. So yes, you can be relieved it's not in you anymore, but would you be relieved that it's all over your pants, feet, car?
    yes actually im one of those guys

    like, i can stop, but only for a short period of time and it really hurts like hell

    nipplessig.jpg
  • Sara LynnSara Lynn Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    the runs are pretty gross but it is a part of being human

    shit just happens, sometimes

  • MetacortexMetacortex The Prettiest Zombie Coeur d'CoeursRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Druhim wrote: »
    I once suffered from completely unexpected diarrhea about half an hour into a hike with a female friend. She was surprisingly chill about the whole thing.

    Any time I enter a wooded area I immediately feel the need to shit.

    4FNao2T.png
  • bowenbowen Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I was jogging once, and I went to fart, except it wasn't.

    I was about a half a mile away from home. I have never run so fast in my life, with cheeks clenched. When I got home, I ran to the bathroom and just did a superman with my clothes, and spun around while spraying shit everywhere and finally landing on the toilet with nothing left to give.

    To this day my mom still thinks my dad did it.

  • WetsunWetsun Registered User
    edited December 2008
    bowen wrote: »
    Wetsun wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    i could never ever start pissing into a bottle because im eternally afraid it wouldnt be enough

    and what then?

    Well, I would still be relieved if I drained 20oz out of my bladder...stopping sucks, but it's better than holding everything in. I was mostly worried because it was dark and I couldn't see how full it was. But damn, 16+ oz is still a decent bottle of pee.

    There's a variably large amount of men who cannot stop pissing once they start. So yes, you can be relieved it's not in you anymore, but would you be relieved that it's all over your pants, feet, car?

    Like I said, I can stop but it's not that pleasant. I feel like it would still be more pleasant than leaving it all in there though. Of course, if you absolutely can't stop then I wouldn't recommend it. It was pretty difficult as it was (the angle was a bit tough), and my fiancee had to do most of the "handling" of things.

    XBL/Steam: Wetsun
  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    once when i was younger, i was about to take a shower when i decided i wanted a different pair of pants. but i was already declothed, so i called to my grandma to bring me a different pair

    and she's like 'why? did you poop yourself? it's ok you can tell me'
    and im like 'no man i just want some different pants, i dunno why, im a kid'

    to this day she still thinks i pooped myself and was too afraid to admit it. just wanted different pants, thats all

    nipplessig.jpg
  • Peter EbelPeter Ebel Deus Vult! OsloRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Peter Ebel wrote: »
    What if menstruation was high pressure?

    PSSSSSSSSHHHHHT!

    We should get our hands on a video of a woman menstruating over time then speed it up super fast.

    What we should do is install a sac that would allow pressure to build. Maybe the sac has anti congealants?

    Fuck off and die.
  • FutoreFutore Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    the runs are pretty gross but it is a part of being human

    shit just happens, sometimes

    that was two words and a comma bigger than it needed to be

    ETqXK.png
  • BrogeyBrogey High Maintenance Santa Monica, CASuper Moderator, Moderator mod
    edited December 2008
    Houk wrote: »
    once when i was younger, i was about to take a shower when i decided i wanted a different pair of pants. but i was already declothed, so i called to my grandma to bring me a different pair

    and she's like 'why? did you poop yourself? it's ok you can tell me'
    and im like 'no man i just want some different pants, i dunno why, im a kid'

    to this day she still thinks i pooped myself and was too afraid to admit it. just wanted different pants, thats all
    Hahahah!

    Grandma knows.

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  • CJTheranCJTheran Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    bowen wrote: »
    I was jogging once, and I went to fart, except it wasn't.

    I was about a half a mile away from home. I have never run so fast in my life, with cheeks clenched. When I got home, I ran to the bathroom and just did a superman with my clothes, and spun around while spraying shit everywhere and finally landing on the toilet with nothing left to give.

    To this day my mom still thinks my dad did it.

    The bolded portion pushes the post two points up the hilarity scale.

  • Dr. FrenchensteinDr. Frenchenstein Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Peter Ebel wrote: »
    Peter Ebel wrote: »
    What if menstruation was high pressure?

    PSSSSSSSSHHHHHT!

    We should get our hands on a video of a woman menstruating over time then speed it up super fast.

    What we should do is install a sac that would allow pressure to build. Maybe the sac has anti congealants?

    like women need to be MORE bloated during that time.

  • ShankusuShankusu __BANNED USERS
    edited December 2008
    Futore wrote: »
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    the runs are pretty gross but it is a part of being human

    shit just happens, sometimes

    that was two words and a comma bigger than it needed to be

    once in a while shit is a thing that will just occur occasionally

  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2008
    Shankusu wrote: »
    Futore wrote: »
    Sara Lynn wrote: »
    the runs are pretty gross but it is a part of being human

    shit just happens, sometimes

    that was two words and a comma bigger than it needed to be

    occasionally, that is to say once in a while, shit is a thing that will just occur, for the most part, naturally

    nipplessig.jpg
  • World as MythWorld as Myth Registered User regular
    edited December 2008
    I've noticed that when my period comes, my whole body just gets as gross as is humanly possible

    maybe it's just the hormones telling me that I'm untouchable, but also I break out and pooping gets extremely gross and soft too even though it's bad enough that it's mixing with the blood which is possibly the worst thing ever

    luckily I only get my period like three times a year! hooray!

    kQwcZLJ.png
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