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Social Entropy++: AWESOME POST in "I Have Found Something Substantial NSF65K?", by Anjin-S

Dr.FunkensteinDr.Funkenstein Registered User regular
edited January 2009 in [2008-2012] Awesome Posts?
Dr.Funkenstein has reported a post.

Reason:
HOLY SHIT AHAHAHAHAHAHA
Forum: Social Entropy++
Post: I Have Found Something Substantial NSF65K?
Posted by: Anjin-San


Original Content:
I was reading a book at work, as I always do.

It was about the end of break, when I turn to my left. A coworker says "Hey, a strategy guide for Zelda."

I sat my book down and thumbed through its contents. I looked to my left and right, asking if anyone had forgot their guide.

Reading some more, I realised this wasn't a strategy guide. The Legend of Zelda: Diamond of Abarious wasn't a real game. I know because I live with a man who has the entire canon memorized.

There were musical cues for Meatloaf and Phil Collins, and a man left this shit to be found hoping that one day, the president of Nintendo would read it, shed a tear and demand that someone FIND CARL CHAMPLIN JR.

I found a script for an Original Legend of Zelda Fan Film at work.

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Dr.Funkenstein on
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Posts

  • thorgotthorgot Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    FIFTY THREE PAGES

    here are the next seven:
    Spoiler:

    campionthorgotsig.jpg
  • LemmingLemming Registered User
    edited January 2009
    Oh god.

  • TychoCelchuuuTychoCelchuuu ___________PIGEON _________San Diego, CA Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
  • TossrockTossrock too weird to live too rare to dieRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    It's worth noting that Anjin works in the Nintendo Factory

  • OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? peach treesRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I don't want to read it I don't want to read it I don't want to read it

    Fuck it I'm reading it

    PSN ID : DetectiveOlivaw | TWITTER | STEAM ID | BUY SOME STUFF!
    Never forget.
  • CyvrosCyvros Look behind you, a clone playing a clone playing a clone playingRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Imp Midna: You're right. I can fix this. Thank you very much for helping me.

    Great Deku Tree: No problem. Have a good time.

    This deserves nothing less than five stars, if only for this man's dedication to the cause.

    Edit: Page 10 seems to be the start of the decline of this man's command of English. And that's saying something.

  • wasted pixelswasted pixels Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    This doesn't even scratch the surface of the weirdness that is the "Zelda community". Here's a girl who invented the Gerudo language from scratch.

    I gather she has developed multiple dialects.

    BTW, I got a message from Obs that equated installing OS X on a PC with car theft, murder and rape. Is he normally like that?
  • Dunadan019Dunadan019 Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    damn, now i gotta go home to read it.... im too intrigued not to.

  • SzechuanosaurusSzechuanosaurus Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited January 2009
    Cyvros wrote: »
    Imp Midna: You're right. I can fix this. Thank you very much for helping me.

    Great Deku Tree: No problem. Have a good time.

    This deserves nothing less than five stars, if only for this man's dedication to the cause.

    Edit: Page 10 seems to be the start of the decline of this man's command of English. And that's saying something.

    Page 10?

    Page 1 more like.

  • CyvrosCyvros Look behind you, a clone playing a clone playing a clone playingRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Cyvros wrote: »
    Imp Midna: You're right. I can fix this. Thank you very much for helping me.

    Great Deku Tree: No problem. Have a good time.

    This deserves nothing less than five stars, if only for this man's dedication to the cause.

    Edit: Page 10 seems to be the start of the decline of this man's command of English. And that's saying something.

    Page 10?

    Page 1 more like.

    I was taking the first ten pages as a general indication of his current command of English. Page 10 is when even that disappears.

  • SithDrummerSithDrummer Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Motherfucker loves Meat Loaf.

    It's an easy game to hate
  • Romantic UndeadRomantic Undead Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Like a bat out of hell, I'll be gone, when the morning comes.
    When the night is over, like a bat out of hell I'll be gone, gone gone.
    Like a bat out of hell, I'll be gone, when the morning comes!
    When the day is done and the sun goes down and the moonlight's shining through...
    Then like a sinner... before... the gates of heaven, I'll come crawling on back... to you...

    3DS FC: 1547-5210-6531
  • HenroidHenroid Nobody Nowhere fastRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Good gravy. I'm ashamed to like the Zelda series as much as I do now.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit."
    - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog (6/15/14)
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited January 2009
    "They'd save their breath if they had of said ASAP instead of saying the whole thing."

    Jesus Christ.

    23 year olds should not be making shit like this.

    Five stars, but the stars are evil stars that devour your soul and make you retarded.

    Maddie: "I named my feet. The left one is flip and the right one is flop. Oh, and also I named my flip-flops."

    I make tweet.
  • Arsenic CanaryArsenic Canary Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Sweet Jesus!

    I think something in my brain just broke...

    Steam: arsenic_canary
  • SithDrummerSithDrummer Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    "Just a flesh wooned"

    It's an easy game to hate
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Meowptimus Prime Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    It's one thing if this was originally written like, in the 80s and heavily-featured Meatloaf.

    BUT NO APPARENTLY IT IS BRAND-NEW.

    meowoptimus.jpg
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
  • Clint EastwoodClint Eastwood This could be forever Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    In the spirit of keeping people updated, here is the rape scene to end all rape scenes.
    Spoiler:

    4TItaHV.jpg
  • CyvrosCyvros Look behind you, a clone playing a clone playing a clone playingRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Holy shit, credit cards and attempted rape scenes? This guy's incredible.

  • ZombiemamboZombiemambo Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    This is an internet legend in the making, here.

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  • CyvrosCyvros Look behind you, a clone playing a clone playing a clone playingRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
  • HenroidHenroid Nobody Nowhere fastRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    No Link

    You

    are the moblins.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit."
    - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog (6/15/14)
  • KalTorakKalTorak Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    And then Link was the moblins.

  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Meowptimus Prime Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    It is amazing that he actually has Malo in the script talking like he does in game in detail about what an item does and how many rupees it costs.

    This guy is 'Sperging so hard.

    meowoptimus.jpg
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Motherfucker loves Meat Loaf.

    but also has some serious Phil Collins love going on. Don't forget it

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  • JAEFJAEF Unstoppably Bald Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Zelda: A Gang of Short Swords

    I can't actually bring myself to read this.

    Battle.net ID: Jaef#1126 -- Steam: Jaef -- PSN: Jaef -- League of Legends: Jaef
    jaefster.png
  • RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    WHAT

    THE

    FUCK

  • Dr.FunkensteinDr.Funkenstein Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    JAEF wrote: »
    Zelda: A Gang of Short Swords

    I can't actually bring myself to read this.

    You can't not read

    It's that amazing

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  • HenroidHenroid Nobody Nowhere fastRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    JAEF wrote: »
    Zelda: A Gang of Short Swords

    I can't actually bring myself to read this.

    I can't believe you wrote that.

    "Ultima Online Pre-Trammel is the perfect example of why libertarians are full of shit."
    - @Ludious
    PA Lets Play Archive - Twitter - Blog (6/15/14)
  • ZackSchillingZackSchilling Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Wow. A script this good deserves a dramatic reading.

    Or at least an embarrassing YouTube video featuring the creator all alone in his room, wearing a muscle shirt, pitching his batshit idea.

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  • darleysamdarleysam Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Wow. A script this good deserves a dramatic reading.

    Or at least an embarrassing YouTube video featuring the creator all alone in his room, wearing a muscle shirt, pitching his batshit idea.

    I requested the same thing, and people are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay ahead on that.

  • PolloDiabloPolloDiablo Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I have never before wanted a sixth star. Anjin-San needs to make the whole thing available.

    Be excellent to each other you stupid cunts.
  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    neville wrote: »
    Motherfucker loves Meat Loaf.

    but also has some serious Phil Collins love going on. Don't forget it

    He's got two ears and a heart, doesn't he?

  • ForarForar #432 Toronto, Ontario, CanadaRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    God damnit, two things in the same week that I can't un-see.

    Why did I read that? WHY???

    All I know now is that I'm certain there is no God.

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