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Best Worst Movies

HeartlashHeartlash Registered User regular
So the other day I was watching John Carpenter's masterwork of auteurism entitled "Big Trouble in Little China" and it got to thinking: What is it that I'm enjoying so much about watching this ludicrous film?

Perhaps the fact that I can turn my brain completely off, consuming the McDonald's of visual media. Equally possible is my desire to massage my own ego, making fun of the campy, bad (whether intentional or not) writing and acting. Maybe I was reliving a childhood fantasy, where bad guys didn't need proper reasons for existing and the good guy always won.

Whatever the reason, it was a very satisfying experience.

So, D&D, what are some of your favorite bad films or B movies? What attracts you to them? Do you find yourself watching them often? And finally, is there an art to them? I know I've often found that Sci-fi's attempt at creating B movie greatness every weekend fails miserably.

My initial list includes the following in addition to Big Trouble in Little China:

Army of Darkness
Starship Troopers
David Lynch's (or Alan Smithee's :P ) DUNE
There are probably more, but I can't think of them off the top of my head.

Heartlash on
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Posts

  • LitejediLitejedi Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    The first two Underworld films, primarily because of Kate Beckinsale, but also because of vampires fighting werewolves.

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  • Can_CalyxCan_Calyx Registered User
    edited February 2009
    Those Days Different.
  • BogartBogart Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
  • LacroixLacroix Registered User
    edited February 2009
    Do Tank Girl and LadyHawke count?

    I don't think I could sit through new The Black Dahlia alone, but with friends it is a hysterically bad film. Its the only one i've just spent the entire film ripping on it with my friend (Cinema was almost empty, and I was whispering... though it was hard to contain laughter at some points... its just SO bad!)

  • TachTach Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I'll second Big Trouble in Little China, and add:

    The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai
    Rock and Rule
    The American version of Godzilla
    Cabin Boy

    My wife loves crappy monster movies- she tried to get me to like Sundown with David Carradine and Bruce Campbell, but holy hell it was frigging awful. MST3K awful.

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  • PodlyPodly good moleman to youRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    The correct answer to this thread is


    Bloodsport

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  • rchourchou Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Welcome to The Rock.

  • RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    There is no earthly reason I should've watched Standing Tall the entire way through since it stars The Rock, and Johnny Knoxville. But I dug it. A lot.

  • PodlyPodly good moleman to youRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    oh shit the rock is a pretty damn good movie

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  • maximumzeromaximumzero I...wait, what? New Orleans, LARegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    The George of the Jungle film from the late 90s is great for parodying itself, but it tries a bit too hard sometimes.

    And on the subject of Brendan Frasier, every single one of the Mummy films that he's been in fits the bill.

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  • JohannenJohannen Registered User
    edited February 2009
    Big Trouble In Little China is on every Christmas in the UK and it is one of the greatest films ever made.

    Also:
    Universal Soldier to go with Podlys Bloodsport

  • HeartlashHeartlash Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Podly wrote: »
    oh shit the rock is a pretty damn good movie

    "Winners go home and f*** the prom queen"

    Must watch again.

    Great stuff so far guys.

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  • PongePonge Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    We were staying in a hostel in San Francisco that had a VHS player and some tapes you could borrow. So we chose...

    STEELE JUSTICE. Starring Martin Kove (Aka the bad sensei from the Kobra Kai in the Karate Kid) as John Steele, an ex-vietnam vet who becomes a one man army when his partner (and fellow vietnam vet friend) is killed by an enemy of his in Vietnam.

    Fucking awesomely cheesy film that starts off well (a rat with a grenade tied to it), and just gets better (Steele works for the Buero of Wild Horse Management... How manly) and better (theres an 80's dance video scene) and better (he breaks into a secret weapons testing facility to steal a top secret gun).

    He has a snake called '3 step'', because if it bites you, then you have 3 steps before you die.

    Just... watch this.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSS-H1_BWOk

  • JohannenJohannen Registered User
    edited February 2009
    Heartlash wrote: »
    Podly wrote: »
    oh shit the rock is a pretty damn good movie

    "Winners go home and f*** the prom queen"

    Must watch again.

    Great stuff so far guys.


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  • CherrnCherrn Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I freaking love Starship Troopers. You can argue all you want about how inferior it is to the book, but a a self-contained story it is almost a flawless action movie. Except for the acting, but it almost works in its favour.

    Dune is great as well, and I'm a huge fan of the book. Contrarily, it has one of my favorite casts in film history. All it needed was Brian Cox, and all the handpuppet sandworms would be forgotten.

    Weird Al's UHF is another movie that's pretty terrible, but can consistently make me laugh. It's difficult to lay down judgement when discussing spoof movies as you can make the case that they're often intentionally bad, but there's a mountaneous difference between Airplane! and Meet the Spartans. Same goes for movies like High School High, which is pretty bad overall, but, hey, it has Jon Lovitz. Same goes for many of the supernatural monster movies that came out of the 90s like Mimic, Species or The Relic (which I adore, for whatever reason).

    All creature will die and all the things will be broken. That's the law of samurai.
  • wwtMaskwwtMask Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Obligatory Snakes on a Plane. Additionally, 80s horror movies like Basketcase, Phantasm, Night of the Creeps, and the wonderfully gory and stupid Bad Taste.

    When he dies, I hope they write "Worst Affirmative Action Hire, EVER" on his grave. His corpse should be trolled.
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  • TofystedethTofystedeth veni, veneri, vamoosi Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    DoA: Dead Or Alive.
    So bad, yet so awesome. Watching it a group of my best friends, many of whom played the game with me, or at least watched it being played helped a lot. So did beer and turning off the brain.

    Worst Worst is Nukie. Holy god is it bad.

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  • PodlyPodly good moleman to youRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Seriously, Bloodsport is the best movie.

    Say it! SAY IT!


    m....maté

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  • CherrnCherrn Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    DoA: Dead Or Alive.

    Similarly, Takashi Miike made a movie called Dead or Alive. It's basically a standard yakuza drama about a cop hunting down some notorious criminal.

    That is, until the end.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gi_cjQLiplI

    All creature will die and all the things will be broken. That's the law of samurai.
  • CherrnCherrn Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Podly wrote: »
    Seriously, Bloodsport is the best movie.

    Say it! SAY IT!


    m....maté

    You break my record, now I break you, like I break your friend!

    All creature will die and all the things will be broken. That's the law of samurai.
  • PodlyPodly good moleman to youRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    *sand in eyes*

    *training montage*

    *epic ass kicking*

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  • JohannenJohannen Registered User
    edited February 2009
    Cherrn..... that was fucking insane.

  • OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? peach treesRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Rocky IV and Rambo (the new one)

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  • mcdermottmcdermott Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Heartlash wrote: »
    Podly wrote: »
    oh shit the rock is a pretty damn good movie

    "Winners go home and f*** the prom queen"

    Must watch again.

    Great stuff so far guys.

    Dude...you can say fuck here. :P


    And yes, The Rock was my absolute first thought upon reading the thread title. It's horrible, yet fantastic at the same time. You've got a fantastic actor in Sean Connery, maybe in Cage as well (definitely debatable), doing an utterly atrocious over-the-top action wankfest...and it works. One-liners, bullets, explosions, car chases that had to be shoehorned in but dammit, they're there, everything.

    Awesome.

    Same goes for Con-Air, only replace Connery with Malkovich (and Buscemi).

    Hell, you can even go for the Nicholas Cage "what the fuck why are these movies on Starz 24 hours a day" trifecta, and throw in Gone in 60 Seconds. But that one's probably pretty controversial....I think a lot of people hated it, and not in a good "love to hate it" way.



    Bloodsport is a great one too, though really both Van Damme and Steven Seagal put out some pretty good bad movies back in the day.

    Spoiler:
  • HonkHonk Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2009
    Me and some friends had hilarious fun when we watched "War Inc.". Every minute of it was so god-awfully bad that it became very fun to dissect it.

  • Element BrianElement Brian Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I'm not sure how bad it is, but being an 80's flick, I guess its debatable. Rad has always had a special place in my heart, especially for this scene

    School Dance...on bikes!

    I like the idea of the carbonation in your pop being too much for your mormon body

    too worldly nooooo
  • SithDrummerSithDrummer Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I'm Gonna Git You Sucka is a pretty damn fine comedy

    It's an easy game to hate
  • chamberlainchamberlain Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I submit Beastmaster and Red Sojna to the record.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qb5zm3FV47E

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7EvEV4jtmY



    And no hating on Tank Girl. Seriously, that movie is awesome.

    The list never changes: http://www.infinitebacklog.com
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  • Gabriel_PittGabriel_Pitt Damn you, eidetic memory! Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Gymkata - when you're a willowy badass who beats up bad guys with your gymnastic prowess, it's amazing how often you can find a pommel horse just where you need it.

    I'd also say, 'Best Guy,' but I'm the only one on this board who's seen it. :P

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  • Johnny ChopsockyJohnny Chopsocky Scootaloo! We have to cook! Grillin' HaysenburgersRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
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  • Richard_DastardlyRichard_Dastardly Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I'm Gonna Git You Sucka is a pretty damn fine comedy

    All I remember from that movie is the dude with the goldfish in his platform shoes.

    And I submit one (1) The Toxic Avenger.

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  • tsmvengytsmvengy Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Starcrash.

    David Hasselhoff in a Star Wars ripoff? Yes.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sC-dwjrinK0

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  • PodunkPodunk Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Airborne, from 1993. I have no idea why I love this movie. Teenager from California (loves surfing and rollerblading) moves to his relatives place in Cincinatti for 6 months. It ends with a 20 minute downhill rollerblading race (Devil's Backbone!) to determine which neighborhood is superior. Also has Jack Black and Seth Green.

    Also, Demolition Man.

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  • BarcardiBarcardi All the Wizards Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Point Break.... hands down Point Break

  • Richard_DastardlyRichard_Dastardly Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Barcardi wrote: »
    Point Break.... hands down Point Break

    First: Fuck you.

    Second: That movie is a classic, it launched Kianu Reeve's career and won like 10 Oscars.

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    cats are douches
  • Rhesus PositiveRhesus Positive Damn these electric sex pants! Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mars. Working out the many layers of flashbacks is entertainment in itself.

    Another successful post, thanks to the power of Spacestar Ordering™!
  • BarcardiBarcardi All the Wizards Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Barcardi wrote: »
    Point Break.... hands down Point Break

    First: Fuck you.

    Second: That movie is a classic, it launched Kianu Reeve's career and won like 10 Oscars.

    Your response only further funds my endless summer.

  • Knuckle DraggerKnuckle Dragger Explosive Ovine Disposal Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    There is no earthly reason I should've watched Standing Tall the entire way through since it stars The Rock, and Johnny Knoxville. But I dug it. A lot.

    The Rock actually has made some entertaining movies. The Rundown was by no means a good movie, but it definately had its moments, especially Walken's monologues..."Do you understand the CONCEPT of the tooth fairy?"

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  • ShadowfireShadowfire Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
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