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Best Worst Movies

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    SkittlebrauSkittlebrau Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I'm gonna have to put in for the Substitute series. The first in the series starred Tom Berenger, and came out around the same time as Dangerous Minds.

    Much like Dangerous Minds, The Substitute featured an ex-marine getting a teaching job in an inner city high school, and also like Dangerous Minds, eventually ended up with both teacher and students learning that you can't always judge a book by its cover, because in The Substitute, that ex-marine teacher is actually a mercenary hired to kick the absolute shit out of some gang members, and eventually bust the dope-dealing ring being run out of the school. It also has Ernie Hudson as the evil principal. And Marc Anthony before he became a singer and married Jennifer Lopez.

    Later installments in the series would star Treat Williams, and feature him kicking the shit out of another school gang, college football jocks, and a secret neo-Nazi unit in a military school.

    Oh, and then I also wanna vote for Sidekicks, that karate movie where Jonathan Brandis daydreams about kicking ass with Chuck Norris.

    Skittlebrau on
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    VariableVariable Mouth Congress Stroke Me Lady FameRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    sidekicks! yeah yeah yeah. I always think about the scene where he imagines Norris teaching him to climb the rope.

    Variable on
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    SkittlebrauSkittlebrau Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Man, looking at the imdb listing for Sidekicks shows what an awesome cast that movie had. Danica McKellar, Joe Piscopo, Mako, Beau Bridges, and Richard Moll.

    Skittlebrau on
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    Angel_of_BaconAngel_of_Bacon Moderator mod
    edited February 2009
    Dudes, what. No love for Death Race 2000?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J7T1mzD8nc

    It's got Stallone driving a car with a giant knife on the front for godssake.

    Angel_of_Bacon on
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    Eat it You Nasty Pig.Eat it You Nasty Pig. tell homeland security 'we are the bomb'Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Richy wrote: »
    I can't even write the name of this movie without getting carded, so I'll post the poster.

    Gayniggersfromouterpsaceposter.jpg

    This movie has gay black aliens travelling the galaxy to destroy the scourge that is females and spread gayness. They find Earth, where men are oppressed by women (represented by a Chinese peasant cringing as his wife nags him), and save us by wiping out womankind. They then baptise their new gay representative on Earth (like a Christian baptism but with a white creamy liquid) and depart to find another planet to rescue. Oh, and the movie was black-and-white, until after the destruction of women, when it becomes colour.

    So to summarize, this movie is offencive to gays, blacks, women, Chinese, Christians, and space aliens.

    whaaaaaaaat

    how is this possible

    who made it

    Eat it You Nasty Pig. on
    NREqxl5.jpg
    it was the smallest on the list but
    Pluto was a planet and I'll never forget
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    IdolNinjaIdolNinja Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I humbly submit Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter to this thread of awesomeness. Jesus returns to fight against the ever growing threat of lesbian vampires. He is joined in his mission by the Mexican wrestling superstar Santos. Highlights include Jesus using kung fu on a group of atheists, and a surreal talk with God who speaks to him via a cherry sundae.
    Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter

    Also, Megaforce. Viewer discretion is advised if you don't enjoy motorcycles with mounted machine guns and rocket launchers, dune buggies with lasers, and a fighting force equipped with the most powerful weapons that science can devise. Did I mention that the motorcycles can fly?
    Megaforce!


    So much love goes out to anyone mentioning Flash Gordon, Big Trouble in Little China, Robot Jox, and the Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai. Some of my all time favorites. I also just added Torque, Sharks in Venice, and Crank 1 and 2 to my must see list thanks to this thread. :^:

    IdolNinja on
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    TorgoTorgo Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Dudes, what. No love for Death Race 2000?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J7T1mzD8nc

    It's got Stallone driving a car with a giant knife on the front for godssake.

    This movie is directed by Roger Corman, but it's probably the best thing he's ever done. HILARIOUSLY over the top stereotypes and cheesy action, and it invented (?) the whole joke of pretending to hit things with a car for points. I love this movie.

    Torgo on
    History is a spoiler for the future. (Me on Twitter)
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    ArthilArthil Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Got a couple here that I recall fondly, think one got mentioned already but no one put up a video for it!

    The Last Starfighter
    A movie that I could never get enough of, considering I was really into video games at the time it was almost like a young nerds wet dream.

    Flight of the Navigator

    Oh my god, this has got to be one of my favorite movies growing up. I will admit I'm not sure whether this is a so bad it's good movie, heck to me over half the movies in this thread are outright awesome, I just wanted to post this here cause of the awesomeness D:.

    Maybe I liked the movie a bit too much...

    Arthil on
    PSN: Honishimo Steam UPlay: Arthil
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    IdolNinjaIdolNinja Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Arthil wrote: »
    Got a couple here that I recall fondly, think one got mentioned already but no one put up a video for it!

    The Last Starfighter
    A movie that I could never get enough of, considering I was really into video games at the time it was almost like a young nerds wet dream.

    The Last Starfighter is one of the best damn movies of all time. Victory or death!

    IdolNinja on
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    YamiNoSenshiYamiNoSenshi A point called Z In the complex planeRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    For a good (bad?) example in anime, go watch the English dub of Genma Wars. It is the most quotable so-bad-it's-good thing I have ever watched.

    "Stay right there. When I get back, I'm gonna beat that baby out of you."

    YamiNoSenshi on
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    KoolaidguyKoolaidguy Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Koolaidguy on
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    RocketSauceRocketSauce Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    ABC used to show Flight of the Navigator all the time when I was a kid. It was easily my favorite movie next to Empire, growing up.

    RocketSauce on
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    jefe414jefe414 "My Other Drill Hole is a Teleporter" Mechagodzilla is Best GodzillaRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Olivaw wrote: »
    You know I've never actually watched Ninja Scroll

    Never really felt like I was missing anything

    You have no soul.

    Also:
    Cloak and Dagger - watch it and love it
    The Monster Squad - Wolfman's got nards

    jefe414 on
    Xbox Live: Jefe414
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    wwtMaskwwtMask Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Hell yes to Sidekicks. It's like Karate Kid, except the kid is all gay for Chuck Norris, and at the end Chuck shows up and roundhouse kicks the shit out of the Sensei Crease wannabe, played by Joe Piscopo.

    I also want to say Grindhouse, but I'm not sure if we should count intentionally bad movies. Either way, I love Deathproof and Planet Terror.

    EDIT: jeffe414, I forgot about Monster Squad. I loved that movie so much back in the day.

    wwtMask on
    When he dies, I hope they write "Worst Affirmative Action Hire, EVER" on his grave. His corpse should be trolled.
    Twitter - @liberaltruths | Google+ - http://gplus.to/wwtMask | Occupy Tallahassee
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    Peter EbelPeter Ebel CopenhagenRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Am I to infer that someone in here thinks that Bloodsoprt is not the crowning achievement of mankind? So help me God, if I infer this there shall be a reckoning.

    Peter Ebel on
    Fuck off and die.
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    wwtMaskwwtMask Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Bloodsport is pretty terrible if you're watching it for anything other than Van Damme jump kicking people in the face.

    wwtMask on
    When he dies, I hope they write "Worst Affirmative Action Hire, EVER" on his grave. His corpse should be trolled.
    Twitter - @liberaltruths | Google+ - http://gplus.to/wwtMask | Occupy Tallahassee
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    DuffelDuffel jacobkosh Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    wwtMask wrote: »
    Bloodsport is pretty terrible if you're watching it for anything other than Van Damme jump kicking people in the face.
    Isn't that the entire point of the movie? Or were they subtly getting at some greater universal themes that I missed?

    Duffel on
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    Peter EbelPeter Ebel CopenhagenRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I'm sorry, I enjoy Bloodsport for Forest Whittaker's breath taking portrayal of a young black professional.

    And Asians on steroids.

    Peter Ebel on
    Fuck off and die.
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    QinguQingu Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    IdolNinja wrote: »
    I humbly submit Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter to this thread of awesomeness. Jesus returns to fight against the ever growing threat of lesbian vampires. He is joined in his mission by the Mexican wrestling superstar Santos. Highlights include Jesus using kung fu on a group of atheists, and a surreal talk with God who speaks to him via a cherry sundae.
    I'm sorry, but I must vehemently disagree.

    With a name like "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter" you would think this movie would be the epitome of the badgood ethos of the thread. It is not. And here is why.

    Jesus only dresses like Jesus—robe and sandals, long hair and beard, etc—for like the first ten minutes of the movie. After that, Jesus is like "I have to blend in, better shave and put on modern clothes."

    The remainder of the movie is simply a normal-looking, short man fighting vampires.

    Occasionally there are references to the fact that this man is the Son of God. But honestly, it seems like these people just made a boring, regular, shitty vampire-hunter movie, realized it sucked, and then were like "it would be funnier if he was JESUS" and tagged on the first ten minutes so they could call the movie by its current title.

    It's not a "best worst movie." It's simply a cocktease.

    Edit: is there a Bibleman movie? Because the show definitely qualifies for this thread.

    Qingu on
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    Richard_DastardlyRichard_Dastardly Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I submit for your consideration a film entitled Meat Market 2, if for no other reason than its long, awkward shower scene featuring chubby girls with floppy breasts.

    Richard_Dastardly on
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    iguanacusiguanacus Desert PlanetRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Also, Megaforce. Viewer discretion is advised if you don't enjoy motorcycles with mounted machine guns and rocket launchers, dune buggies with lasers, and a fighting force equipped with the most powerful weapons that science can devise. Did I mention that the motorcycles can fly?
    Megaforce!

    I must find this! It's like some crazy 80's Saturday Morning Cartoon, done in real life. Plus, that was a bitchin' theme song. Like, soooo 80's metal.

    iguanacus on
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    ViolentChemistryViolentChemistry __BANNED USERS regular
    edited February 2009
    I want Megaforce.

    ViolentChemistry on
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    DeadfallDeadfall I don't think you realize just how rich he is. In fact, I should put on a monocle.Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    It pleases me to see Crank mentioned here. My all-time favorite "bad" movie.

    I submit the new Punisher: Warzone. Seriously, it's basically an unintentional action comedy.

    Deadfall on
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    The Raging PlatypusThe Raging Platypus Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    *looks left*

    *looks right*

    XANADU MOTHERFUCKERS

    *laughs maniacally*

    Just try watching this movie after downing a half-dozen beers.

    The Raging Platypus on
    Quid wrote: »
    YOU'RE A GOD DAMN PLATYPUS.
    PSN Name: MusingPlatypus
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    DuffelDuffel jacobkosh Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    iguanacus wrote: »
    Also, Megaforce. Viewer discretion is advised if you don't enjoy motorcycles with mounted machine guns and rocket launchers, dune buggies with lasers, and a fighting force equipped with the most powerful weapons that science can devise. Did I mention that the motorcycles can fly?
    Megaforce!

    I must find this! It's like some crazy 80's Saturday Morning Cartoon, done in real life. Plus, that was a bitchin' theme song. Like, soooo 80's metal.

    How the hell did the world survive that decade

    Duffel on
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    SithDrummerSithDrummer Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I am actually kind of baffled that there are people on the internet who haven't heard of Gayn* From Outer Space.

    SithDrummer on
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    CaptainPeacockCaptainPeacock Board Game Hoarder Top o' the LakeRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I am off to work, so no time to dig up a YouTube, but does anyone recall...

    Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park!

    CaptainPeacock on
    Cluck cluck, gibber gibber, my old man's a mushroom, etc.
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    PodlyPodly you unzipped me! it's all coming back! i don't like it!Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I wouldn't really call Rocky IV a bad movie. It's one of my faves, and it's definitely corny and cheesy, but I definitely wouldn't call it a bad movie.

    Podly on
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    Gabriel_PittGabriel_Pitt (effective against Russian warships) Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Sextette.

    I'm not going to go looking for clips since I'm at work, but it stared an 84 year old Mae West, whose voice was on the way out and suffering from less than full mobility, as a sex-kitten the whole world was still agog over. One of the running gags was that she had just married a British aristocrat (played by Timothy Dalton), and while on their honeymoon at a posh, international hotel, every time they tried to get it on they were comedically interupted, by such as - some former husbands, diplomat Alexei Andreyev Karansky (Tony Curtis), director Laslo Karolny (Ringo Starr), gangster Vance Norton (George Hamilton), and an entire athletic team from the U.S., who all want to have sex with her.

    Gabriel_Pitt on
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    emnmnmeemnmnme Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    I just watched Wanted last night for the first time. A plot so stupid that it actually turned out enjoyable.

    emnmnme on
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    RyadicRyadic Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    How have we've forgotten these movies?

    TMNTMoviePoster.jpg

    TMNT_2.jpg

    TMNT_III_film.jpg

    These are terrible movies, but I loved them as a child and still do for nostalgia factor. Plus... they're fucking Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. How awesome is that shit?

    Ryadic on
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    tsmvengytsmvengy Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Arthil wrote: »
    Flight of the Navigator

    Oh my god, this has got to be one of my favorite movies growing up. I will admit I'm not sure whether this is a so bad it's good movie, heck to me over half the movies in this thread are outright awesome, I just wanted to post this here cause of the awesomeness D:.

    Maybe I liked the movie a bit too much...

    Flight of the Navigator is not a good bad movie. It is a good movie. Pee Wee Herman as the voice of the ship? Awesome.

    tsmvengy on
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    emnmnmeemnmnme Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Duffel wrote: »
    iguanacus wrote: »

    I must find this! It's like some crazy 80's Saturday Morning Cartoon, done in real life. Plus, that was a bitchin' theme song. Like, soooo 80's metal.

    How the hell did the world survive that decade

    Bill Cosby rode an ostrich in Leonard Part 6. By all accounts, we shouldn't have survived 1987.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AD4bk776a-0

    emnmnme on
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    darleysamdarleysam On my way to UKRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    wwtMask wrote: »
    mcdermott wrote: »
    Oh hell yeah, Killer Klowns. Awesome horrible movie.

    Wicker Man was just plain old bad, though.

    Which version? The 70s version had all this unnecessary nudity that was common around that time, which made watching it a little more bearable.

    Hold up, the original Wicker Man is a bad movie?

    Since when?

    darleysam on
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    Armored GorillaArmored Gorilla Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    Log Jammin'

    "I think the cable box is broken."
    "Yes that is why they sent me I am an expert."

    Armored Gorilla on
    "I'm a mad god. The Mad God, actually. It's a family title. Gets passed down from me to myself every few thousand years."
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    Armored GorillaArmored Gorilla Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    TMNT_III_film.jpg

    Yes.
    TMNT_2.jpg

    Yes.
    TMNTMoviePoster.jpg

    NO. This movie is awesome.

    "THIS? Is family? You call THIS a family?"

    I dunno, the movie works for me. A movie about a family of giant ninja turtles works.

    Armored Gorilla on
    "I'm a mad god. The Mad God, actually. It's a family title. Gets passed down from me to myself every few thousand years."
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    wwtMaskwwtMask Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    darleysam wrote: »
    wwtMask wrote: »
    mcdermott wrote: »
    Oh hell yeah, Killer Klowns. Awesome horrible movie.

    Wicker Man was just plain old bad, though.

    Which version? The 70s version had all this unnecessary nudity that was common around that time, which made watching it a little more bearable.

    Hold up, the original Wicker Man is a bad movie?

    Since when?

    An awful lot of it was boring and slow paced, the mystery about the missing girl was pretty well telegraphed, and the main character was such an abrasive moralizer that I wasn't sad at the way the movie ended.

    wwtMask on
    When he dies, I hope they write "Worst Affirmative Action Hire, EVER" on his grave. His corpse should be trolled.
    Twitter - @liberaltruths | Google+ - http://gplus.to/wwtMask | Occupy Tallahassee
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    SkutSkutSkutSkut Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    2nding or thirding w/e Deep Rising is at.

    I also have the evil dead trilogy and Bubba Hotep.

    SkutSkut on
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    jefe414jefe414 "My Other Drill Hole is a Teleporter" Mechagodzilla is Best GodzillaRegistered User regular
    edited February 2009
    SkutSkut wrote: »
    2nding or thirding w/e Deep Rising is at.

    I also have the evil dead trilogy and Bubba Hotep.

    Wait, has this thread switched from best WORST movies to simply best movies? Dammit.

    jefe414 on
    Xbox Live: Jefe414
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    DuffelDuffel jacobkosh Registered User regular
    edited February 2009
    emnmnme wrote: »
    Bill Cosby rode an ostrich in Leonard Part 6. By all accounts, we shouldn't have survived 1987.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AD4bk776a-0
    That was actually kind of awesome. The idea that a restuarant kitchen is so chaotic somebody could be firing off automatic weapons and nobody would notice seems strangely true-to-life.

    Duffel on
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