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I WATCH THE WATCHMEN (spoilers)
#pipeCocky Stride, Musky odoursPope of Chili TownRegistered Userregular
Ok so I saw the Watchmen last night, and there's no question whether you should see it or not.
YOU SHOULD SEE IT AT YOUR EARLIEST CONVENIENCE.
Below is a few spoilers with my take on things. These are actual movie spoilers about changes, performances, visuals etc, so if you want to be surprised, don't click them!
Ok first things first, this movie looks stunning. The world created is pretty breathtaking, you've almost certainly seen the set dressing stills and stuff so that's no surprise, Doc Manhattan looks a bit over cooked sometimes, he glows just a little too much, but over all I'm pretty pleased with how they did him. All the other special effects stuff is seamless.
The performances are pretty great all round, Rorshach (particularly while he's in prison) and Comedian knock it out of the park, and Billy Crudup makes a Doc you can actually relate to.
I really enjoyed the action. It's all very clinical, you see every move in detail which I like. There is a bunch of the slow-down button from 300 but not too much I don't think. All of the fights are very one sided which is the way it should be.
The Direction is very loyal to the book, you will recognise most of the shots and dialogue and everything really - this is a good thing. It's not a parody, it recognises how great the original is and follow a "if it ain't broke" approach.
The first thing that I realised I didn't like about it was probably not gonna be avoided - everything feels rushed. It was always gonna happen so I can't feel too bitter I guess. The biggest casualty of cutting scenes for time, in my opinion, is the Street Paper guy and the kid reading Black Freighter. These guys appear in the movie for a second, but don't have a single line. They're not that important as characters, but to me, the Paper guy is the voice of the people. He talks to the kid about how he's seeing these events unfold, and his experience is the general public's experience. Without him, it really is like the story isn't affecting anybody but the watchmen... and Nixon (who has waaaaay too much face time if you ask me).
Pages and pages of exposition are rushed through in the opening credits, and a bunch of it from the book never even gets a chance on screen. but like I said, kind of inevitable unless they made it a trilogy or something which would've been stupid.
Remember that review the guy wrote saying that the movie left him wondering if the book was any good to begin with? If he actually thought that, he's an idiot. But I could see how an idiot could think something like that. There are parts of the story - particularly Laurie's relationship with Dan, which even though they essentially use all the same ingredients as in the book, are overdone and verge on being corny.
I was positive about the changed ending, but it kind of fell flat. I hate to say it, but the alien was really important. the only thing that made it kiiiiind of believable was the scale of the disaster. There was no unknowable threat from beyond the stars to draw the world together, but there was worldwide death and destruction - the disaster hit everyone equally, which kind of works I guess, but it also meant that Adrian killed loads more people.
THE VIOLENCE AND SEX IS VERY GRATUITOUS.
You see elbows bend the wrong way and bones pop out, you see skin dissolve and organs burst, you see people explode and spray the room with gore. It is meant to illicit a reaction, and it surely does.
But man, Laurie and Dan's sex scene in Archie is fucked up. The music and the camera positions and the detail of their movements - I was sitting in a theatre next to a girl who I have had sex with, and it was making me intensely uncomfortable.
Also there are dicks everywhere
Malin Ackerman gets her breathtaking boobs out, but not enough dammit.
THE BOTTOM LINE
It's great! The only problem I have with it is I wish it was longer and had more stuff. Honestly, if the movie was twice as long, I'd like it twice as much. That's positive right?
I enjoyed it very much, I'll be seeing it again this weekend with a different bunch of people and I think it'll be very successful, though not as successful as the Dark Knight.
The only reason I say that is that my Mum liked the Dark Knight - really liked it. And she wouldn't like Watchmen.
FOUR STARS OUT OF FIVE
Go and see Watchmen, then use this thread to talk about Watchmen.
NO SHENANIGANS. BOGEY IS TOO NICE.
Also if someone makes a Nite Owl solo flick I wall stab a motherfucker