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Fuck Muscle Cramps, this is a Teddy Roosevelt thread

Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
edited March 2009 in Social Entropy++
So I just got woken up at 3 in the morning by some of the most excruciating pain i've ever experienced. and then when i tried to straighten my leg i'm pretty sure i pulled my calf muscle. i can barely walk on the fucker.

Metzger Meister on
www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
Spoiler:
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Posts

  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

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  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    My nipples seem to be dripping.

  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    then you are not a man.

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  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    What...I don't even....

    An Obama related traffic accident? Like hundreds of Muslim cab drivers were suddenly slowing you down? You really need to be more PC.

    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    then you are not a man.

    You, sir, just missed a chance to suck my nipples.

  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    What...I don't even....

    An Obama related traffic accident? Like hundreds of Muslim cab drivers were suddenly slowing you down? You really need to be more PC.

    well to be fair it was the morning call to prayer.

    www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
    Spoiler:
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    Jam, not accident. He was in Orange County, so everyone from LA felt the need to drive there all at once. Unfortunately, my house is between the two.

    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

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  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    Jam, not accident. He was in Orange County, so everyone from LA felt the need to drive there all at once. Unfortunately, my house is between the two.

    What, is he the new Prophet? Like, wherever he is, is that the new Mecca or something?
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    How the fuck do I know. I'm the least political person I know.

    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • BearstranautBearstranaut Registered User
    edited March 2009
    man when I was younger up until my late teens it would sometimes like feel like the tendon connecting my ass to my leg was trying to contract until it detached. It would leave me on the ground, looking like the hanging man from a tarot card for awhile until I drank some water and screamed for a bit.

    anyways enough about me lets talk about you

    You ever try and draw Falcor as a giant dong? No? It just ends up looking like a long cyclops.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    Nads wrote: »
    Jam, not accident. He was in Orange County, so everyone from LA felt the need to drive there all at once. Unfortunately, my house is between the two.

    What, is he the new Prophet? Like, wherever he is, is that the new Mecca or something?
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    i was infantry yeah. sand hill's where they train us nowadays.

    blackstav.jpg
  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    i was infantry yeah. sand hill's where they train us nowadays.

    Really? Damn, they put us through the sand hill. It sucked balls. Actually had some dumbass in my platoon fall in right on top of an ant hill (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country, the sand hill was so named because it was covered in red ant hills). He lasted about 20 sec before he lost his shit in ant bites.

    Of course, never mind they told day ZERO that if they fall in on an ant hill, move away from the fucking ant hill.

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country,

    ...

    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • BearstranautBearstranaut Registered User
    edited March 2009
    ants are such delightful scamps

    You ever try and draw Falcor as a giant dong? No? It just ends up looking like a long cyclops.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    i was infantry yeah. sand hill's where they train us nowadays.

    Really? Damn, they put us through the sand hill. It sucked balls. Actually had some dumbass in my platoon fall in right on top of an ant hill (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country, the sand hill was so named because it was covered in red ant hills). He lasted about 20 sec before he lost his shit in ant bites.

    Of course, never mind they told day ZERO that if they fall in on an ant hill, move away from the fucking ant hill.

    those fucking ants are everywhere nowadays. without fail, every time we went out on a field exercise, i would be the asshole who dropped prone right on top of a god damn nest of the things.

    buddy of mine dove into cover right on top of a nest of brown recluses though so i guess it could have been worse

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  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Your country smells bad and I wouldn't serve it breakfast.

  • L|amaL|ama Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country,

    ...

    those ants were totally going to launch the first attack of the invasion

  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country,

    ...

    Benning is not only a Basic Combat Training station, but it's also the Infantry School, which means it serves primarily as the United States Army Infantry School and One Station Unit Training Center. All such types of posts that are related to combat arms (Infantry, Artillary, etc) only train male recruits.

    Or, what?

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.

    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    there are creatures in georgia that do not belong in the world of men.

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  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Your country smells bad and I wouldn't serve it breakfast.

    My country can falsely accuse your country of doing something crazy to the UN and then invade your country, starting a war which would quickly devolve into a quagmire, which would then result in a near civil war breaking out amongst the primary cultures of your country.

    Oh, also, which country are you from?

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    there are creatures in georgia that do not belong in the world of men.

    Yes, like young females who just got back from a tour in Korea and are suffering from Korean goggle syndrome.

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Your country smells bad and I wouldn't serve it breakfast.

    My country can falsely accuse your country of doing something crazy to the UN and then invade your country, starting a war which would quickly devolve into a quagmire, which would then result in a near civil war breaking out amongst the primary cultures of your country.

    Oh, also, which country are you from?

    Iraq.

  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    A very informative answer to a question I did not ask.

    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Your country smells bad and I wouldn't serve it breakfast.

    My country can falsely accuse your country of doing something crazy to the UN and then invade your country, starting a war which would quickly devolve into a quagmire, which would then result in a near civil war breaking out amongst the primary cultures of your country.

    Oh, also, which country are you from?

    Iraq.

    I'm a fucking psychic.

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Your country smells bad and I wouldn't serve it breakfast.

    My country can falsely accuse your country of doing something crazy to the UN and then invade your country, starting a war which would quickly devolve into a quagmire, which would then result in a near civil war breaking out amongst the primary cultures of your country.

    Oh, also, which country are you from?

    Iraq.

    u owe us 1

    blackstav.jpg
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    so reading about soldiers being eaten alive by ants and listening to lamb of god at the same time is pretty metal.

    www.facebook.com/itgetsworseska
    Spoiler:
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    so reading about soldiers being eaten alive by ants and listening to lamb of god at the same time is pretty metal.

    it is trooly grim

    blackstav.jpg
  • ToxTox I kill threads Pharezon's human garbage heapRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    ChicoBlue wrote: »
    Your country smells bad and I wouldn't serve it breakfast.

    My country can falsely accuse your country of doing something crazy to the UN and then invade your country, starting a war which would quickly devolve into a quagmire, which would then result in a near civil war breaking out amongst the primary cultures of your country.

    Oh, also, which country are you from?

    Iraq.

    u owe us 1

    Yeah, srsly. You're welcome.

    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    James Dean was the actor, Jimmy Dean was in the sausage business.

    James Deen is both an actor AND in the sausage business.
    Secret Satans! Post | Gaming Wishlist | General Wishlist
    Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • beavotronbeavotron Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    metz i get those too
    they're called charlie horses
    and the best thing to do if you get one next time is immediately stand up and put all your weight on that leg
    it seems like the fucking worst idea but trust me
    if you do this, you won't have the excruciating pain for like 10 minutes and you won't have the dull aching pain all day the next day

    it's usually caused by dehydration, so i get them when i'm drunk sometimes, the results are hilarious as i stumble around in the dark hopping on one foot yelling "owwwww"

  • Rampant EntityRampant Entity Registered User
    edited March 2009
    Hey, I had that too.

    My friends were around at the time so they started kicking me in the leg, increasing the pain even further.

    My friends are dicks.

  • superjoesuperjoe Registered User
    edited March 2009
    I had this problem last night

    leg cramp/charlie horse buddies hi5

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  • VivixenneVivixenne aDAWRable! Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
  • Lost SalientLost Salient Z is for Zillah who drank too much ginRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    there are creatures in georgia that do not belong in the world of men.

    Yes, like young females who just got back from a tour in Korea and are suffering from Korean goggle syndrome.

    I have to ask... what is this?


    Another alternative for solving leg cramps is to reach down and grab the toes on the offending leg, then pull back. Arch your foot while you do it. It always fixes the problem for me, at least.

    QuW2glN.jpg"Sandra's favourite movie is escape from new York because she cries when magpie and brain die because they will never be together." i read books sometimes
  • VivixenneVivixenne aDAWRable! Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Another alternative for solving leg cramps is to reach down and grab the toes on the offending leg, then pull back. Arch your foot while you do it. It always fixes the problem for me, at least.

    yeah you're basically stretching out the calf muscle, i.e., the cramp

    never heard it described the way you're describing it though

    most efficient way to beat down any cramp is to stretch through it, and preventing cramps just means upping potassium intake

  • BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Sometimes I just cry and punch at the muscle.

    Battletag BYToady#1454
  • Rampant EntityRampant Entity Registered User
    edited March 2009
    You know, you guys can just stand up straight. That usually solves most cramps.

    I mean, that is if the cramps are in the leg muscles.

  • Lost SalientLost Salient Z is for Zillah who drank too much ginRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    That might be because I'm bad at describing things! But that makes sense. If only I didn't have an irrational but intense hatred of bananas, my calf muscles would be cramp-free.

    QuW2glN.jpg"Sandra's favourite movie is escape from new York because she cries when magpie and brain die because they will never be together." i read books sometimes
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