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[Mustachealalia++] MUSTACHES ALL THE TIME

1246764

Posts

  • scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    The equation of the internet

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  • DE?ADDE?AD Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    [Gary]
    "I'm afraid they must find their own way, Gary. I cannot protect them."

    Gary steps through the door. There is a feeling of skin being pulled back around him, and his head clears. He steps out into a vast circular chamber of ivory metal. Prismatic skorokov swirls like a sandstorm around him, multi-colored lightning sparking from particle to particle, the sheer energy of the thing causing Gary's fur to stand on end.

    A thin, transparent catwalk wraps around the exterior wall of the chamber, the only thing keeping Gary from falling into the abyss below. At the chamber's center, a giant, throbbing ball of energy with a tiny speck of black at its core. A walkway extends up toward the ball, and on its stands a large form in a crimson spacesuit, scraggly white fur covering its exposed head and hands.

    [Tomarli]
    Tomarli tries to run, but slips and falls back down to the floor, into the forest of legs.

    "Wow," giggles a voice behind him. "You really got issues, don't you? Big ol' mind break, you are."

    [Dubh]
    "No treck. Oi'm rally 'ere," Anne says, reaching down and drawing a gun from the holster on her hip. "and Oi'm 'ere to aarrest ye, brotha." She shakes her head sadly. "Oi'm sorry, but it's the way ees gotta go. Please, brotha, dinnae get scrappy wit' me. I ain't wan' to fight ye."

    [Locth]
    "Give them to me!" the woman growls, black dust leaking from her mouth. Her hands are twitching wildly, as if she's doing everything she can to hold herself back.

    [Loeli]
    "HA HA HA," the thing cackles flatly. "LOOK AT YOU, HACKER. PATHETIC CREATURE OF MEAT AND BONE, PANTING AND SWEATING AS YOU HUDDLE IN YOUR CORNER. HOW COULD YOU HOPE TO CHALLENGE A PERFECT, TALKURISION MACHINE?"

    The gold dust around the bricks rears up and lashes out at you. As it touches your skin, your mind reawakens, and you veins glow gold.

    Loeli is back, bitches.

    "WAIT. WHAT? NO. BAD FEMTOBOT!" the monstrosity yells at its skorokov components.

    [Speed]
    [17 vs. 11] Speed pulls his hand free. Racer X shakes his head. "No, Speed. I did it to protect you. I did it because it was the only way I could be sure that those enemies I had gained in my career as a racer would not go after you. You were so young, then, Speed. I could not let them hurt you, or Trixie, or your mother, or Pops. I had to do something, and I did what I did for that reason!"

    qsfwtzhym4ax.png
  • BearstranautBearstranaut Registered User
    edited April 2009
    "You have got to be shitting me."

    You ever try and draw Falcor as a giant dong? No? It just ends up looking like a long cyclops.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • NeoTomaNeoToma Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    "Oh hey. Are you doing this? And by doing this I mean, being completely a jerk."

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  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    "Why would enemies of you come after us? None of us had even ever seen you before until you killed my brother. You... oh no. No, no no no no no." Speed jumps off of Racer X and backs away.

    "I... y-... Rex?"

    speedsig2_zps388d2098.jpg
  • DubhDubh Sailor V Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh's eyes widen. Then, he starts to laugh. "Hahahahaha! By Cheshire, AHAHAHAHAHA!" He strangles his laughter. "Worst treck ever." Three tranq darts appear in Dubh's hand. He was the best dart thrower in North Manx, all those years ago. And Anne's bionic eye made a particularly enticing bulls eye. Time for the triple twist.

    Thing_zps6acf1883.png <---DE?AD makes games
  • DE?ADDE?AD Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    [Gary]
    The white-furred Urson turns around at the sound of Gary's voice, a wide, toothy smile spreading across his face. "Garus RokStar!" he sneers, walking back toward you. "Velcome to the Heart! It is so good to be seeing you again!"

    [Tomarli]
    "This? Nah, that ain't me." A creature of writhing, slippery vines steps out of the crowd. It coalesces into a vaguely humanoid form with a large, twin-pupil eye at the center of its mass. "I'm just here to make sure you bite it. Cactuarese are old-hat. I'm just here to make sure the Marshies are the only ones left standing, homie."

    [Speed]
    Racer X climbs to his feet and pulls off his helmet. Rex looks up at you. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you. I... I wouldn't have now, but times are desperate, you have a price on your head, and I couldn't let someone collect that price. I came here under the pretense of destroying you, but I am here to help. My suit has been fitted with a manceric cancellation device. I will give it to you. I can survive here, for a while. Use that time, well, Speed."

    [Dubh]
    [20 vs. 18] [Anne Loses One Biotic Soldier Rank] Anne tries to dodge, but Dubh is quicker nailing a bullseye with all three darts. An arc of electricity races across her face and she recoil. "Ow, sonafabitch!" she yells. "Waaat the 'ell?"

    qsfwtzhym4ax.png
  • BearstranautBearstranaut Registered User
    edited April 2009
    "I've never killed someone twice - I mean I've tossed around the threat, but I never knew I would actually be facing the distinct possibility of actually doing it...."

    Gary breaks into an accelerating jog towards that bastard, stretching his arms and rolling his neck.

    You ever try and draw Falcor as a giant dong? No? It just ends up looking like a long cyclops.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    [Loeli]
    "HA HA HA," the thing cackles flatly. "LOOK AT YOU, HACKER. PATHETIC CREATURE OF MEAT AND BONE, PANTING AND SWEATING AS YOU HUDDLE IN YOUR CORNER. HOW COULD YOU HOPE TO CHALLENGE A PERFECT, TALKURISION MACHINE?"

    The gold dust around the bricks rears up and lashes out at you. As it touches your skin, your mind reawakens, and you veins glow gold.

    Loeli is back, bitches.

    "WAIT. WHAT? NO. BAD FEMTOBOT!" the monstrosity yells at its skorokov components.

    Loeli blinks a few times as her mind comes back to the surface. She points at it, shaking her head. Skorokov flow from her palms and she uses them to infiltrate the Talkurision bot. Through them, she speaks, <I have done this before, when I was much less experienced. You will be my exit.>

    When the skorokov's job is complete, she interfaces the bot with the broken computer in an attempt to reach any networks it was connected to.

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  • DubhDubh Sailor V Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh runs forward and goes into a slide, feet first, toward Anne. Right when he's about to hit her, he does a backflip off the ground and attempts to kick the gun out of her hand and catch it in his.

    Thing_zps6acf1883.png <---DE?AD makes games
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    "Ser-Sergent Pepper?", Tommy weakly says as his former officer slams his head into the brook.

    The memories come flashing back to him.

    Boot Camp, I was finally accepted. Due to my abilities as a mancerer, I was accepted. My parents were so proud. I was not. I knew I didn't belong in the academy. For five years, they trained me to kill. At one point, I had enough of it. Enough of being yelled at. Enough of seeing my training buddies die do to exhaustion. Enough 'heat-related' deaths.

    I snapped.

    Sergent Pepper was mean, abusive, and cold-hearted. He would burn a trainee alive for speaking up against him. And there was no one who could stop him. We were all alone on Training Facility 72457. Just the five of us, and him. Well, I guess there were the other 16, but they didn't exactly hold up to his 'standards'. I knew that by the end of the year, he would more than likely kill us all. He would probably tell the academy that we got lost in the forest during a scenario. Perhaps he would have told them that the local Photosyithoids had abducted us. It was all one sick game to him really.

    And so, I snapped, like any logical creature would do.
    One day during exercises, he was blowing fire onto our backs as he forced us to do push-ups. He got down on one knee and started yelling specifically at me. I had decided weeks ago that I was gonna fight back. None of the other supported me. They said he was too strong. Still, I pressed on with my plan.

    Seeing the opening to strike, I pretended to punch the ground in anxiety. As he came in closer to yell at me for my attitude, I covered my fist in the dirt on the ground, and quickly turned it into cement. Rolling over and driving my fist into his jaw, he stumbled backwards out of pain and surprise, and into a conveniently placed bush. Standing up, I used my manceretic abilities that I originally learned on my home planet, and later mastered with Group 420. I commanded the bush to hold him down with it's powerful branches. Pulling some vines off a nearby tree, I whipped him from pelvis to neck, leaving scars all over his body. Then, without a word, I escaped into the forest.


    Tommy, awakening from his flashback, looks up at the other Draconid, looking for the scars that would prove his worst fears.

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • LockoutLockout I am still searching Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Locth frowns. "You aren't being very reasonable here, miss. How about we work together to get out of here, then I hand them over? Can't very well give away my only defense, can I?"

    I assume there's some reason I can't just transfer the memories to her, but keep the skorokov and my powers?

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  • DubhDubh Sailor V Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Nice, Tommy.

    Thing_zps6acf1883.png <---DE?AD makes games
  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Speed stares at his brother speechlessly for a few moments.

    "Rex what do you mean that you can survive "for a while?" If you need your manceric-cancellation equipment to live I'm not going to take it from you, I'm not about to kill my brother after learning after all this time that he was alive! The two of us are leaving here together! We can make it home just in time for our sister's wedding oh goodness can you just imagine everyone's faces when they see that you're alive well you probably can because you're seeing my face right now but oh my goodness Spritle's never met you we have another little brother that was born after you left Rex and then I think you owe me a race oh my god I can't believe you're alive!" Speed embraces his brother.

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  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh wrote: »
    Nice, Tommy.

    Is this a 'good job' nice or a sarcastic nice?

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • MarshmallowMarshmallow Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Oh shit, Marshies!

  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Oh shit, Marshies!

    Now you have no excuse!

    Your character is already made.

    speedsig2_zps388d2098.jpg
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Oh shit, Marshies!

    Now you have no excuse!

    Your character is already made.

    Let's hope Tomarli doesn't kill him.

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • DubhDubh Sailor V Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh wrote: »
    Nice, Tommy.

    Is this a 'good job' nice or a sarcastic one?

    It's legit. This is great back story, done on a dime.

    Thing_zps6acf1883.png <---DE?AD makes games
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh wrote: »
    Dubh wrote: »
    Nice, Tommy.

    Is this a 'good job' nice or a sarcastic one?

    It's legit. This is great back story, done on a dime.

    Thank you, I already started on some of the backstory for when he joins up with Group 420 on the wiki.

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh wrote: »
    Dubh wrote: »
    Nice, Tommy.

    Is this a 'good job' nice or a sarcastic one?

    It's legit. This is great back story, done on a dime.

    Don't listen to him! He's still being sarcastic!

    speedsig2_zps388d2098.jpg
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh wrote: »
    Dubh wrote: »
    Nice, Tommy.

    Is this a 'good job' nice or a sarcastic one?

    It's legit. This is great back story, done on a dime.

    Don't listen to him! He's still being sarcastic!

    Awww.

    :cry:

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • DubhDubh Sailor V Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Dubh hates Speed.

    Thing_zps6acf1883.png <---DE?AD makes games
  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    I can't tell if you're talking in-game or if you're doing some weird sort of third-person thing because of what I just said!

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  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Tommy has no idea why everyone is angry.

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • DubhDubh Sailor V Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    :).

    Thing_zps6acf1883.png <---DE?AD makes games
  • NeoTomaNeoToma Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    DE?AD wrote: »

    [Tomarli]
    "This? Nah, that ain't me." A creature of writhing, slippery vines steps out of the crowd. It coalesces into a vaguely humanoid form with a large, twin-pupil eye at the center of its mass. "I'm just here to make sure you bite it. Cactuarese are old-hat. I'm just here to make sure the Marshies are the only ones left standing, homie."

    "Fuck! I remember ya'll marshmen being slimy, grimy, cold sons of bitches. Didn't remember you being so ugly tho."

    "So what's yo hustle? This ain't exactly the tourist capital of the 'verse."

    Tomarli scouts his surroundings out of the corner of his eye for potential weapons and advantages.


    Also that backstory is pretty rockin Tommy.

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  • DE?ADDE?AD Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Lockout wrote: »
    I assume there's some reason I can't just transfer the memories to her, but keep the skorokov and my powers?

    You could, but she doesn't really want the memories, she wants the skorokovized citizens you absorbed.

    Tommy gains .

    [Gary]
    The white-furred Urson grins and matches Gary's charge - barreling down the thin walkway toward his dark-furred counterpart. [24 vs. 20] [Urson Loses One Urson Rank] The two bear-men collide at the mid-point of the pathway, savagely lashing out at each other with tooth and claw. Gary gets in a single, vicious strike on the polar-Urson, knocking him to the ground.

    The Urson rises quickly back to his feet, but Gary is there with a backhanded swipe the puts the white-furred man back on the ground. [24 vs. 20] [Urson Loses One Urson Rank]

    [Loeli]
    The Talkurision's network holds against Loeli's assault, and as she begins to pull back, its programming surges forward, sending waves of wreck-code washing through her system. [15 vs. 19] [Loeli Loses One Goldblood Technic Rank] "NOT THAT EASY THIS TIME. I HAVE GROWN. I HAVE ADAPTED. EVOLVED. YOU WILL FALL." [21 vs. 14] [Loeli Loses One Goldblood Technic Rank]

    [Locth]
    "Well, I could kill you and take it," she offers.

    [Dubh]
    [20 vs. 20] [Tie] Dubh slides forward and kicks the gun from Anne's hand, but she quickly leaps into the air, flipping over him, reclaiming her gun, and landing in a crouch. "Ye rottin' son av a hoor!" she hisses, charging forward and shoulder-checking you into one of the brick walls. You rebound off the wall, and manage to plant a dagger in her biotic arm as you shoot by. [20 vs. 22] [Anne Loses One Biotic Soldier Rank]

    [Tommy]
    It's a little hard to see the scars, what with the spacesuit he's wearing and all, but you're pretty sure you recognize his face.

    [Tomarli]
    "Says the needly fucker," the Marshman quips. "An' my hustle is coming here to off you. Kinda thought that was obvious."

    It lashes out with a vine, cutting a painful line across Tomarli's cheek. "En garde!" [19 vs. 15] [Tomarli Loses One Plantkin Rank]

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  • scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    De?ad does Loeli have her Goldblood: Biotic aspect?

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  • DE?ADDE?AD Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    DE?AD wrote: »

    [Gary]
    The two bear-men collide at the mid-point of the pathway, savagely lashing out at each other with tooth and claw.


    Haha, Bear-men
    DE?AD wrote: »

    [Dubh]
    [20 vs. 20] [Tie] Dubh slides forward and kicks the gun from Anne's hand, but she quickly leaps into the air, flipping over him, reclaiming her gun, and landing in a crouch. "Ye rottin' son av a hoor!"

    Isn't that her mom too?

    Also, yay, I got another cool point!

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Shit Gary is not fuckin' playing games this time.

    speedsig2_zps388d2098.jpg
  • DubhDubh Sailor V Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    "Waaat can oi say? We cum from de seem mum." He dashes forward, shoots his grappling hook on a nearby street light and tries to grab Anne around the neck and a do a reverse pile drive into the pole.

    Thing_zps6acf1883.png <---DE?AD makes games
  • scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Loeli recoils in pain, rubbing her forehead, she looks back at him, her brow furrowed menacingly, <I have grown and adapted as well! If I cannot turn you, I can still crush you!> she booms through the skorokov, pouncing on the boxes and using her biotics to focus skorokov in her muscles. She tears at the wiring and tries to disable the machine.

    Time to use a physical aspect :3

    japsig.jpg
  • LockoutLockout I am still searching Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    "Maybe. Doubt it. Even if you do kill me, who's to say you'll be able to make it out alive? These parts don't seem too friendly. Might need each others' help, down the line."

    "And besides, I wouldn't want anything to happen to a pretty lady like yourself," he says with a smile.

    f24GSaF.jpg
  • LockoutLockout I am still searching Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Also DE?AD, I'm not sure if you saw Speed's post.
    Speed stares at his brother speechlessly for a few moments.

    "Rex what do you mean that you can survive "for a while?" If you need your manceric-cancellation equipment to live I'm not going to take it from you, I'm not about to kill my brother after learning after all this time that he was alive! The two of us are leaving here together! We can make it home just in time for our sister's wedding oh goodness can you just imagine everyone's faces when they see that you're alive well you probably can because you're seeing my face right now but oh my goodness Spritle's never met you we have another little brother that was born after you left Rex and then I think you owe me a race oh my god I can't believe you're alive!" Speed embraces his brother.

    f24GSaF.jpg
  • Speed RacerSpeed Racer I'm Speed Racer and I drive real fast. I drive real fast, I'm gonna last.Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    What's goin' on with me?

    EDIT: Lock's got my back.

    speedsig2_zps388d2098.jpg
  • NeoTomaNeoToma Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Tomarli drops his wooden box on the ground and starts darting back and forth between the legs hoping to lose his opponent.

    Then, when he least expects it...

    "Bonsai motherfucka!" Tomarli decends from the sky and delivers a thorny sandal right to the center of the Marshman's slimly dome.


    Add a cool point to this. I just realized I haven't really been using them.

    funkybanner_zps9614e94d.png
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    hahahahahaha I get it

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited April 2009
    Tommy looks up, "Sgt. Pepper? Is that you?"

    Tumbling
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!

This discussion has been closed.