Our new Indie Games subforum is now open for business in G&T. Go and check it out, you might land a code for a free game. If you're developing an indie game and want to post about it, follow these directions. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
Our rules have been updated and given their own forum. Go and look at them! They are nice, and there may be new ones that you didn't know about! Hooray for rules! Hooray for The System! Hooray for Conforming!

Fuck whatever we were playing, let's get ready for some goddamn DARK SUN

StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy!And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
edited September 2009 in Singularity Engine++
Do you suddenly feel awkward? Have zits spontaneously sprouted on your face? Does the mere thought of the opposite sex make your palms go sweaty?

It's okay. You're in the tabletop gaming thread!


We talk about all kinds of games, here! Hell, we'll even talk about board games!

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Some of our favorites:

-Dungeons and Dragons 4e
-World of Darkness
-Mutants and Masterminds
-Spirit of the Century
-Dark Heresy

Quetzi explains the classes and races of 4e!
Straightzi wrote: »
Alright, Player's Handbook. The main shit. The shit you need to play. Here is what it has got going on for it:

Races:
Dragonborn- Alright, at first I was like, "Pshaw, dragonborn." But no, that is incorrect. Not only do these bastards look like dragons walking around in big fucking suits of armor, they breathe fire, or acid, or what have you, and make awesome fucking battlefield commanders. Plus, despite being basically lizardlike in appearance, the chicks have huge racks.

Dwarves- Dwarves are where the shit is at. Gimli and those thirteen hobbit motherfuckers have nothing on these dwarves. Yeah, they're short, but they're still using weapons just as huge as the rest of you, and they're wearing armor like it ain't no thang at all, and the motherfuckers do not get tired. They just fucking don't.

Eladrin- Alright, elves are pretty cool. You know elves. And despite what everyone says, fairies are pretty cool. Well eladrin are kinda like both of those, only, y'know, better. They're the lords and ladies of the feywild, which is a crazy magic land straight out of A Midsummer Night's Dream and classical fairy folklore. Oh yeah, and they teleport all the fuck over the place, just for the fun of it.

Elves- Elves aren't fancy prancy sissies in D&D, not anymore at least. No, they are hardcore woodsmen, hiding in the trees with their bows and straight taking you out. And all of them can do that. They're so rad that they all just know how to use a longbow, like, naturally.

Half-Elves- Also known as half-humans, these motherfuckers are the best of the best between elves and humans. You're a human, you know how awesome you are (pretty awesome), and elves are badass forest gods, so you just gotta like half-elves. And what do you know, everyone does. They just kinda get along, despite not being a real proper race in their own right.

Halflings- These short motherfuckers ain't no lazy Baggins stock no, they are athletic motherfuckers who specialize in thievery, wildernessing, and kicking your ass. They're nimble as motherfuckers, and get out of the way of all sorts of shit you throw at them, beside being charming little bastards because they're the size of like a ten year old. A ten year old that will eat you for breakfast.

Humans- You know humans, you are one. If that doesn't sell you, well, these humans can do anything. They aren't specialized for one thing or another, no, it's your choice. They are versatile as hell, and thus are capable of being better than anyone else in so many ways it can't even be comprehended.

Tieflings- Alright so take a devil, and then take a human, and cross that shit straight up. These are humans with horns and cloven feet, and they're deceitful, wily motherfuckers. They ain't some weird crossbreed that never ever shows up either, they're all over the place. Sure, not as much as humans or nothing, but still pretty dang prolific, and total gothcandy.

Classes:
Cleric- Alright, if you went to Catholic school you're gonna get this one easy. Think of those nuns and priests and shit who hit you with rulers. Yeah, now give them a huge fucking suit of armor, a fuckall big morningstar, and divine goddamn retribution following every strike. Burning with holy fire and shit, right there. Add in the ability to heal the hell out of you without even touching you, and you've got yourself a cleric.

Fighter- The name says it all for this dude. The motherfucker knows how to fight. He's got big weapons or he's got shields and heavy armor, or whatever, but he will knock you on your ass and curb stomp the fuck out of you with whatever it is he is using. On top of that, the bastard yells at you the whole way through, and you're so distracted you can't fight anybody but him.

Paladin- Alright, now take those first two, and make them into one dude. One dude with better armor than either of his component two. One dude who not only carries around a sword bigger than you, but also has a direct fucking line to God and holy fire raining down around him, around all of you. And he doesn't just distract you from fighting other dudes, you hit one of his bros in a fight and he's gonna hit you with that fuckall sword.

Ranger- This is a dude who knows the woods. And not in any gay hippy way, no, he just straight up knows the fucking forest. Oh yeah, and he can wreck you with his choice of weapons. Either a massive fucking Robin Hood bow, or a pair of slicing scimitars moving faster than that dude who got shot in Indiana Jones. Or, y'know, nature itself, a fucking bear. Yes, that's right, he can kill you with the power of his pet fucking bear.

Rogue- This is a stealthy as fuck dude who steals your wallet. Or a con artist who steals even more. Or a dude who just pounds on you until you give it to him. Point is, the dude knows how to steal, and knows how to fuck you up. Generally with tiny little knives and crossbows that most other people would do jack shit with, and generally before you can even see him do it.

Warlock- Alright so say you want to be a magician or something, but you don't want to be a boring old wizard buried in books. How about you sell your soul, y'know, to the devil, the faerie queen, or, y'know, the lost gods of the Necronomicon? Yeah, if you do that you become a warlock, and you have the power to throw around magical energy just for fucking kicks, and wreck dudes with their own nightmares and demonic images and shit.

Warlord- Most dudes on like, a war battlefield will probably be some mookish fighters or something, but the warlord, that is the one who knows exactly what is going on. The one who is ordering them all into the fight, on top of being in the fight himself and knocking through bad motherfuckers like paper dolls. On top of this, one fucking pat on the ass and encouraging word from this guy has you fighting for ages. Now that's some fucking charisma.

Wizard- The wizard is all about books of magic, which sounds kinda lame, I mean, you already gotta read shit to play this game, why you gonna read shit once you're playing it? I'll tell you why, it's because of the wizard. The wizard has a magic fucking book full of goddamn explosive fireballs and illusionary nightmares and shit. That is the kind of book we all want, so do your best to mimic it and play a fucking wizard

Let me break down the player's handbook two for you son

Alright, we got some races:
Devas- Part angel, in contrast to the tiefling's part devil. Pretty sleek for that alone, but then on top of that they are perpetually reincarnated into newer, more devatastic forms, so any given deva character has thousands of years of experience floating just below the surface.

Gnomes-So you know Eladrin, right? How they're all fey as fuck but they're that classy Oberon and Titania bullshit going all over the place. Well gnomes are like that, only sly mischievous little fuckers. Old school bogeyman house fairy shit going on, and hell, the bitches turn invisible when they get hit. That is pretty much the best.

Goliath- You think dragonborn and shit are big? You ain't seen goddamn nothing, because these motherfuckers are huge. "So?" you say, "Who cares if they're big?" Well these guys are gonna make you care because they've got skin like stone and are designed for beating the tar out of things.

Half-Orcs- Half-Orcs used to be a shitty little race of rape babies, but no, not anymore. Now they are sleek and almost attractive and can dish out damage like nobody fucking else. I cannot say enough about how good they made half-orcs, they're like everybody's favorite villain only, y'know, better.

Shifters- These dudes are pretty much in here for players who want to be playing faggy world of darkness games. But they ain't part vampire or nothing, they're part fucking therianthrope. Either wolf or tiger, your choice, but needless to say they kick as much ass as the animals they got in their veins.

Classes:
Avengers- If you saw paladins and thought they were zealous, you ain't seen nothing yet, because avengers will rip your shit up in the name of the Lord without using some cheap ass huge fucking suit of armor or shields or nothing. Religious fucking assassins at their absolute finest.

Barbarian- Being a big fighter dude is pretty cool, right? How about a big fighter dude who sees red, hulks out and goes into a mad fucking rage, embodying all sorts of animals and mythical creatures and shit to swing around the biggest weapon he can find and destroy everything in his path?

Bard- The bard is like that pretty good musician you saw that time who really, like, moved you man. Except this one actually moves you, then enchants you, then rips your soul straight from your body with intense virtuoso power.

Druid- Alright, history lesson. The druids occupied the British isles and worshiped sick Celtic deities and practiced human sacrifice. Amongst other things, they claimed the ability to turn into animals. So guess what the druid can do? Yes, that's right, turn into animals, but not just animals, primal fucking forces of nature. That and, y'know, curse you and all your descendants to next thursday.

Invoker- The invoker has a power that forces all enemies to kneel before him or suffer intense psychic damage. They are the crazy street dudes standing on soapboxes crying about the lord to your clerical minister and priest. And they ain't faith healers either, they have ridiculous fire and brimstone shit going on.

Shaman- This is a dude who has an animal that walks around with him, except, instead of a real animal, it's a super ghost animal which he can channel his power through. He does this to ravage the shit out of his enemies with crazy magic ghost animal claws. On top of that, he will heal the shit out of you and your buddy.

Sorcerer- Wizards are kinda neat, right? They like, study magic and become really good at it and carry around big ol' spellbooks and use them a lot. Well, sorcerers are like this, only, instead of spellbooks and years of study they've got the magic in their veins. This gets better when the magic is there because of fucking dragons and primordial chaos and shit, allowing them to destroy anything in their path.

Warden- The last of the primal sorts, the warden is a big bulky fighter who then embraces nature so much that he lights on fire. And then he swings a big fucking spear over his head and all his enemies light on fire too. And then are struck by lightning and rams made of pure nature magic. The man controls the elements, and that is hardcore.

Curious to see how deep the rabbit hole goes? Moriveth solves that mystery, along with his trusty box o' porn!


NSFW

Utsanomiko comes in with even more wonders and horrors, bringing us this lovely Wuthering Heights RPG!

Wuthering Heights

Orikaeshigitae made this kickass Victorian styled character sheet for D&D, if you have a need of such things: http://orikaeisnakedbut.iseenothing.com/victorian_sheet.pdf


Some of us run online games, because we don't have friends in real life because we're huge nerds. Here's a sampling:

Glossolalia, by DE?AD. Based largely on Risus, I think, this is a play by post relatively ridiculous freeform game. It is probably accepting new players.

Dungeons and Dwarves, by me (Quetzi). A D&D 4e game where everyone is a dwarf. Laid back, but still fairly regimented play by post.

The Paranormal Defense Division, a Mutants and Masterminds game that I run on Tuesday nights in the SE vent channel. Ridiculous and pulpy and mildly Hellboy inspired, only with more communists. It is perpetually accepting new player applications, talk to me about it.

Something Marshmallow runs in Ventrilo and Maptools, possibly on Fridays? It's D&D 4e, and I think it's fairly laid back about it, but that's about all I know.

Let me know if you want anything added to this.

Straightzi on
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Posts

  • MorivethMoriveth Nobody suspects a thing... Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Q-Dog, I love you, so I hope you can forgive me for calling you Q-Dog

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I am totally cool with such a moniker

    But now I'm going to bed, because urgh it's late

  • DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    That...kobold? Gnoll? Whatever, the dude on the far right. Fucker needs to learn how to parry or something, holy shit he's cut up everywhere.

    Also did PA get hired to do the 4e art in the manual or something? What's the source on that image?

    hello massa, I jar jar binks
    I've overheard someone say "Don't say something is retarded, its not cool to make fun of retards. Just say its gay."
  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    So....tired...must...post....blaahhhhhhh

    From the Desk of the Democratically-Elected Pharaoh-President of the Shadowrelam of Egypt
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!
    Tumbling
  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    That is indeed a gnoll, probably with ACTION SCARS!

  • Tommy2HandsTommy2Hands what is this where am i Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I like how the dragonborn's sword has a mad face on it

    From the Desk of the Democratically-Elected Pharaoh-President of the Shadowrelam of Egypt
    MacGuffin wrote: »
    Baka!
    Belief in the heart of friendship and you'll always be kawaii Tommy-Chan!
    Tumbling
  • DE?ADDE?AD Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Is it just me, or does that warforged look as if he is about to tip over backwards?

  • ZonugalZonugal Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Defender wrote: »
    That...kobold? Gnoll? Whatever, the dude on the far right. Fucker needs to learn how to parry or something, holy shit he's cut up everywhere.

    Maybe that's just how he rolls...

    Andrew_WK_Sig.jpg
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Mori you should totally put Dark Heresy in the OP as well.

    headthrown.jpg
    Gamertag: PrimusD | Rock Band DLC | GW:OttW - arrcd | WLD - Thortar
  • KingMoleKingMole Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    One day I will have the time/money to get into tabletop stuff.

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  • FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY EVERY DAYRegistered User regular
    edited July 2009
    whoa when did game draw that picture in the op?

    i love warforged, lizardmen and gnolls :o

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  • TheLawinatorTheLawinator Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    Mori you should totally put Dark Heresy in the OP as well.

    This is proper, because DH is amazing.

    My SteamID Gamertag and PSN: TheLawinator
  • RubberACRubberAC Sidney BC!Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I'm pretty sure this was Gabe drawing his DnD group back when he got really into it, isnt it?

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  • FishmanFishman I'm Buddy Rich when I fly off the handle Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    This thread is going to require me to drown many kittens, isn't it?

    X-Com LP Thread I, II, III, IV, V
    That's unbelievably cool. Your new name is cool guy. Let's have sex.
  • KingMoleKingMole Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Goddammit I started reading the excerpts for core books on the D&D site and now I want to spend my money on buying those books instead of using the money to buy a computer.

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  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    so, wait, this FATAL thing, that's real?

  • KingMoleKingMole Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Yes.

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  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    That is fucking horrifying.

  • stimtokolosstimtokolos Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    When I read the bottom of Mori's post where he says the rulebook is 1000 pages. Just wow.

  • Burden of ProofBurden of Proof You three boys picked a beautiful hill to die on. Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Defender wrote: »
    That...kobold? Gnoll? Whatever, the dude on the far right. Fucker needs to learn how to parry or something, holy shit he's cut up everywhere.
    Kobold?

    Weak man.
    For example, a slovenly trollop offers herself to a strapping young adventurer if and only if he can expediently say a tongue-twister of her choice. Driven by hormones, the young male agrees, and asks what is the tongue twister. The courtesan challenges "Huge hung hero hunks hastily hump horny heaving hot whores. How 'bout it, huh?"

    This is better than DnD.

  • DubhDubh Ghost Plz don't heal meRegistered User regular
    edited July 2009
    DE?AD wrote: »
    Is it just me, or does that warforged look as if he is about to tip over backwards?

    I see you're putting those years of action figure knowledge to use.

    (I agree)

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Dark Hersey added to the OP

  • DubhDubh Ghost Plz don't heal meRegistered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Mmmmhmmmm

    That there is a good OP

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Yeah thanks for that Dubh

  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Quetzi we're playing M&M tonight, right?

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Yes

    Tonight at 5 pm EST, which is in like, seven hours and fifteen minutes

  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Awesome.

    Awesome to the max.

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    And I'm far enough ahead with things that if we finish the current mission early there's a chance we could go on to the next

  • MrMonroeMrMonroe Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    damn, that makes me want to pick up the 4e books

    but I already have so many perfectly good 3.5 manuals!

  • The Sneak!The Sneak! Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    My first 4th Edition campaign starts this Sunday. I am super excited.

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    4e is so good bro

    Also M&M dudes I just had the best idea ever on how to stat out Spike

    It makes him like level 12 or 13 to pull off, but it's so fucking worth it

  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Didn't we fight against a ridiculously high-leveled enemy once?

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Hmm

    I can't think of anything

    Technically the Lovecraftian monstrosity the Aussies summoned was liiiike level 15, but I was playing it fast and loose with it because it wasn't the important part of the fight.

    Everything else has been between level eight and ten

    Like, first mission, the adult Gnoph Kehs were level eight, but if you'd fought them they probably could've destroyed you because there were a bunch. And those werewolves in the mad scientists castle were level ten, but all close quarters combat, so they could have done some damage if Midas hadn't been there.

  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I was talking about the sub owner.

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    with Mutants & Masterminds, if a higher level enemy doesn't have bullshit high Impervious Toughness or is insubstantial or something, you can usually take them out with a lucky shot or two.

    The players in my M&M campaign are PL 10, and they have taken out PL 15 villains twice (once by trickery, mind you).

  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    This guy had a nuclear submarine.

    EDIT: We were shot with a missile while on the submarine, but the submarine didn't even get a dent.

  • Zen VulgarityZen Vulgarity What a lovely day for tea Secret British ThreadRegistered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I want to play Dark Heresy so bad

    oVSbgTI.png For more artwork like this, check out Jakub Rozalski's imgur
  • MrMonroeMrMonroe Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    also, ahem:

    does this ring any bells?

    because I have a copy of this fantabulous old game and I'd like to run it on SE in a very fast, loose manner, taking suggestions for all four player characters from anyone, playing out the most interesting/funniest/smartest/dumbest suggestions, photographing them, and then displaying the results from the turn all at once

    is this a good idea y/n?

  • StraightziStraightzi I love thee, I'm charm'd by thy beauty, dear boy! And if thou'rt unwilling, then force I'll employ.Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Oh

    Yeah Jormundgar is kinda high level I guess. I don't think I did vehicle stats right though, so probably not as bad as I thought before.

    But I'd statted him as level 10, but like 90 of that was submarine. He had no powers himself, he just had pretty decent brawler stats (but with no feats). And like 16 ranks in pilot submarine.

    Depending on how the consistent party thing goes I might start revealing enemy character sheets, but Jormundgar I might end up keeping anyways as more of a Spike counterpart than a Wheelman counterpart, because your enemies do need transport.

  • PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    MrMonroe wrote: »
    also, ahem:

    does this ring any bells?

    because I have a copy of this fantabulous old game and I'd like to run it on SE in a very fast, loose manner, taking suggestions for all four player characters from anyone, playing out the most interesting/funniest/smartest/dumbest suggestions, photographing them, and then displaying the results from the turn all at once

    is this a good idea y/n?

    so basically like the X-Com Let's Play?

    that sounds like a fucking amazing idea.

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