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Criticize my band

PheezerPheezer Registered User, ClubPA
edited July 2009 in Artist's Corner
Okay I'm gonna link our myspace but:
it's not loaded with stupid glittery shit
and
we don't have anything for sale

We've got three tracks posted for a demo, they were recorded in two parts. All instruments, amps, drums live and at once using 5 drum mics, 1 guitar mic and the bass by line out.
The vocals were recorded separately.


I'm aware that some of the drum levels are not perfect, but I see very little that can be done about that.

I'm looking for critiques on a few fronts, are the songs any good, are the recordings listenable, do the vocals work, is there any advice you can give in terms of either recorded sound or the way the songs are written.

I will admit that we will not change our core sound, but none of these songs are more than nine months old and we don't mind experimenting or revision over time, so stuff like "the part where you do x is too long" will be considered.

[url]Http://myspace.com/astrocoven[/url]

Pheezer on
IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH

Posts

  • PheezerPheezer Registered User, ClubPA
    edited July 2009
    Also we have played live, but we knew two thirds of the audience so hard to get a real sense for if the music is enjoyable.

    IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
    CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
  • DirtyDirtyVagrantDirtyDirtyVagrant Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Okay. Please consider that these are only opinions.

    Your music doesn't have enough energy. "Inanimate objects" is the best example of this, because for almost a full minute nothing really happens. It's a baseline, some drums, and like four notes of guitar, and your vocalist does not change it for the better. I cant understand what he's saying (which is fine by me), but I do notice that the lyrics you guys have written have been stretched over the music, and this just sounds...off. If you've got to hold the word "is" for three or four beats just to make the lyrics fit, it's time to write new lyrics.

    I think the sound is fine. I just believe you're playing maybe 10bpm too slow, and that you guys should change it up a little bit. Find some way to play with your sound in a unique way. Your guitarist should maybe think about being a little more involved with the music. He doesn't have to play power chords and crazy solos just to contribute - a little crunchy kind of muted rhythm behind some of that might help. And it doesn't have to just be the same old shit - he can find something cool to toss in.

    The distortion you're using for your vocals may also be just a tad overwhelming.

    Who is your target audience here? What are you trying to say?

  • PetalmunkPetalmunk Registered User
    edited July 2009
    I only listened to Inanimate Objects... In my opinion the song would gain alot if you cut the first 3:17 of the song and start from there. Its droning and repetative at the start with limited build. The vocals are very distracting to this point also. I'm not sure if its the lyrics not complimenting the music or the vocal effect/tone but its just offputting to me. A good example of this is from 1:58-2:30. The "GoooOOoooooooOOoo" is not helping the feel of the song. I get its the hook, but you might want to write a new one. At 3:17, the guitar and drums start to get alittle interesting and the song's energy starts at that point. Its a solid breakdown. I get the whole Tool/Rammstein thing you're trying to do, but the first almost 4 minutes are alittle rough to listen to and would recommend scraping it. Or in the least shortening it to a single verse.

  • PheezerPheezer Registered User, ClubPA
    edited July 2009
    We're not really trying to do a "tool/rammstein" thing. We're not trying to do anything specific, it's more of a case of we were jamming and came up with this thing and we liked the way it sounded so we started building on that. Making that song shorter might be a reasonable proposition.


    Edit ps pls listen to the other songs, they are all quite different. Inanimate objects is atypical.

    IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
    CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
  • Stupid Mr Whoopsie NameStupid Mr Whoopsie Name Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited July 2009
    Work on your anatomy.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • PheezerPheezer Registered User, ClubPA
    edited July 2009
    Yeah I tried to hide the hands in pockets cuz they're hard to do right

    IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
    CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
  • JeedanJeedan Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Pheezer wrote: »
    We're not really trying to do a "tool/rammstein" thing. We're not trying to do anything specific, it's more of a case of we were jamming and came up with this thing and we liked the way it sounded so we started building on that. Making that song shorter might be a reasonable proposition.


    Edit ps pls listen to the other songs, they are all quite different. Inanimate objects is atypical.

    You should be trying to do something specific. I know a lot of stock is put in the music as expression thing where you "just like, jam and stuff comes out and thats cool man" but you should have a solid idea of where a song is going, what influences you're drawing on and what specificly you're going to do with them.

    A lot of bad bands dont do this, they list influences as diverse to sound deep as possible or none at all to avoid being pidgeonholed and then make music that hasnt really got any direction or much going for it at all. By contrast if you read interviews with acclaimed successful musicians they tend to be quite upfront about their influences, "we started off really wanting to be our heros X band but then we started incorperating elements of Y too" "I wanted this song to sound very much in the style of Z" its all part of knowing your craft.

  • VistiVisti Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    While I generally dig the whole Electric Wizard / Kyuss stonerfeel you really need to work some dynamics into your music. It's droning and not in the way.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • PheezerPheezer Registered User, ClubPA
    edited July 2009
    Jeedan it's not that we don't haves general direction or a specific sound, I think that if you listen to all three songs you'll find that there's definitely some general cohesion but what my point was is that we aren't trying to sound like a specific band. If that makes sense. We have a sound but we don't want to be just like band x.

    Visti, can you point to anything specific? It's hard for me to step far enough back to say "this part isn't exciting to listen to", though I have a few spots in some of the songs that I think could be shorter. I'm not posting my personal criticisms for want of not influencing further comments though.

    IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
    CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
  • MetalbourneMetalbourne Tube's Favorite Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Pheezer wrote: »
    Yeah I tried to hide the hands in pockets cuz they're hard to do right

    WERE YOU PLAYING YOUR INSTRUMENTS WITH YOUR HANDS IN YOUR POCKETS BECAUSE YOU SUCK!
    Spoiler:

  • VistiVisti Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Pheezer wrote: »
    Jeedan it's not that we don't haves general direction or a specific sound, I think that if you listen to all three songs you'll find that there's definitely some general cohesion but what my point was is that we aren't trying to sound like a specific band. If that makes sense. We have a sound but we don't want to be just like band x.

    Visti, can you point to anything specific? It's hard for me to step far enough back to say "this part isn't exciting to listen to", though I have a few spots in some of the songs that I think could be shorter. I'm not posting my personal criticisms for want of not influencing further comments though.


    The was thinking general dynamics. Switching stuff up within the songs, have a quiet part then a loud part. Have a bass/guitar part be way different from the one before it to add some tension and the release. Right now it seems to be at the same intensity level all the way through.

    Like, I know it's bad form to recommend bands to bands, but bands who are even often accused of sort of droning like ISIS have very varied dynamics even in the first two minutes.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • PheezerPheezer Registered User, ClubPA
    edited July 2009
    I'm familiar with Isis. I don't care for them so much, I prefer neurosis but that's beside the point. Your more detailed observations make a lot of sense and actually aren't unreasonable to consider. I think the way we recorded is partially to blame for some of it sounding flat buuuuuut, I'm going to suggest thinning some parts and building others to shake things up further.

    IT'S GOT ME REACHING IN MY POCKET IT'S GOT ME FORKING OVER CASH
    CUZ THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S GIVING ME A RASH
  • VistiVisti Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I was actually thinking it was at least partially the recording's fault, because at times you can hear the guitarist really cranking it out and the drummer really working the cymbals, but everything basically stays the same level. But yeah, as you said, thinning a part right before an explosive climactic moment will fatten the explosive part way up. It's all, in the most literal sense, relative.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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