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Tie in Mouth Joke

245

Posts

  • RabidDeathMooseRabidDeathMoose Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Weaver wrote: »
    It almost looks like they tried to make the cats have those stereotypically oversized upper teeth that they used to use in caricatures of Chinese folk

    I don't see it...

    siamese-cat.jpg

  • FaricazyFaricazy Registered User
    edited May 2009
    i love old school disney

  • babyeatingjesusbabyeatingjesus Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    I have never seen the Aristocats.

    Weddings without open bars are just wrong.

    That should be the law. A man can marry a male goat for all I care as long as it's an open bar.

    hitthatcheeseburgerfatty.gif
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Why did God make homosexuality a sin?
    Spoiler:

    penguins.png
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    I have never seen the Aristocats.

    Weddings without open bars are just wrong.

    That should be the law. A man can marry a male goat for all I care as long as it's an open bar.

    Word.

    At least a few hours of open bar. After that free beer, wine, and soda and pay for mixed drinks.

  • Kuribo's ShoeKuribo's Shoe Kuribo's Stocking North PoleRegistered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Weaver wrote: »
    It almost looks like they tried to make the cats have those stereotypically oversized upper teeth that they used to use in caricatures of Chinese folk

    I was beaten!

    BEATEN!

    xmassig2.gif
  • babyeatingjesusbabyeatingjesus Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Hunter wrote: »
    I have never seen the Aristocats.

    Weddings without open bars are just wrong.

    That should be the law. A man can marry a male goat for all I care as long as it's an open bar.

    Word.

    At least a few hours of open bar. After that free beer, wine, and soda and pay for mixed drinks.
    Yeah I understand if you can't afford to pay for 100+ people's drinks all night, but give me wine during dinner then the first hour or two afterwards at least! I'm giving you a $100 presentation, more than likely, spend it on me!

    hitthatcheeseburgerfatty.gif
  • HunterHunter Chemist with a heart of Au Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Weaver wrote: »
    It almost looks like they tried to make the cats have those stereotypically oversized upper teeth that they used to use in caricatures of Chinese folk

    I was beaten!

    BEATEN!

    He beat you like a red headed step-child.

  • Centipede DamascusCentipede Damascus ha ha just kidding I'm Frog ManRegistered User regular
    edited May 2009
    I have never seen the Aristocats.

    watch this

    it is the best part in the whole movie

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNEraxj559Y

  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    So racist

    Love that movie

    reposig.jpg
  • BogdanichBogdanich Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    to op that scene is of course from the mask (1994) at around 6 minutes in
    tiescene.png

  • The_ScarabThe_Scarab Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go camping. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes wakes up and turns to Watson lying beside him;
    "Watson. Look up at the stars and tell me what you deduce."
    "Well," replies his companion, "That's a tricky one. I see millions of stars, each the same as our own sun. Each with the possibility, however small, of planets and life. And by their sheer number we must deduce that life is not only out there but abundant, in every corner of our existence."
    "No," Holmes replies, "The correct deduction is that some fucker has stolen our tent."

    scarab you have mental problems
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Two hats are chillin' on a hat rack, when one says to the other, "Hey, you think our owner is gonna use one of us today?"
    "No idea, man. It depends on the weather. I guess one of us should check."
    "Alright, dog, you stay here, I'll go on ahead."

    1LRdqui.png
  • The_ScarabThe_Scarab Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all go to a blood drive.

    The nurse asks the Englishman what type he is.
    O negative, he replies.
    She turns to the Scotsman, who tells her he is type AB.

    She asks the Irishman what type he is.
    He tells her he is an outgoing cat-lover with a heart to share.

    scarab you have mental problems
  • AMP'dAMP'd Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Why did God make homosexuality a sin?
    Spoiler:

    Deacon in 5, 4, 3...

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • GoldenSeducerGoldenSeducer Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    "I say, Holmes, why were you in the loo so long?"

    "Dysentery, dear Watson."

  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Two hats are chillin' on a hat rack, when one says to the other, "Hey, you think our owner is gonna use one of us today?"
    "No idea, man. It depends on the weather. I guess one of us should check."
    "Alright, dog, you stay here, I'll go on ahead."
    a hat would never say 'dog'

    at least not the kind of hat you would find on something as classy as a hat rack

    nipplessig.jpg
  • GoldenSeducerGoldenSeducer Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    What if it's a Davey Crockett hat?

  • iusehappymodiusehappymod Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    coonskin cap.


    Hamlet will be Hamlet
    An ineffable tragedy of the human spirit that still resonates, even today.
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Houk wrote: »
    Two hats are chillin' on a hat rack, when one says to the other, "Hey, you think our owner is gonna use one of us today?"
    "No idea, man. It depends on the weather. I guess one of us should check."
    "Alright, dog, you stay here, I'll go on ahead."
    a hat would never say 'dog'

    at least not the kind of hat you would find on something as classy as a hat rack

    You are thoroughly racist.

    1LRdqui.png
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    coonskin cap.

    As are you.

    1LRdqui.png
  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Houk wrote: »
    Two hats are chillin' on a hat rack, when one says to the other, "Hey, you think our owner is gonna use one of us today?"
    "No idea, man. It depends on the weather. I guess one of us should check."
    "Alright, dog, you stay here, I'll go on ahead."
    a hat would never say 'dog'

    at least not the kind of hat you would find on something as classy as a hat rack

    You are thoroughly racist.
    nonsense! some of my best hats are top hats!

    nipplessig.jpg
  • Bad-BeatBad-Beat Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Like one man said to another as they accidentally drove into the german sausage factory,

    this thread is taking a turn for the wurst.

  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Houk wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    Two hats are chillin' on a hat rack, when one says to the other, "Hey, you think our owner is gonna use one of us today?"
    "No idea, man. It depends on the weather. I guess one of us should check."
    "Alright, dog, you stay here, I'll go on ahead."
    a hat would never say 'dog'

    at least not the kind of hat you would find on something as classy as a hat rack

    You are thoroughly racist.
    nonsense! some of my best hats are top hats!


    Yeah, I saw your post in the camwhore thread.

    dudewithwhitetophats.jpg

    1LRdqui.png
  • CrossBusterCrossBuster Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    AMP'd wrote: »
    Why did God make homosexuality a sin?
    Spoiler:

    Deacon in 5, 4, 3...

    Is he going to call the blaspheme police?

    penguins.png
  • FAQFAQ Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    The_Scarab wrote: »
    An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all go to a blood drive.

    The nurse asks the Englishman what type he is.
    O negative, he replies.
    She turns to the Scotsman, who tells her he is type AB.

    She asks the Irishman what type he is.
    He tells her he is an outgoing cat-lover with a heart to share.

    I find it humorous that whenever an Irish person tells a joke like this, the Irishman is still the retard

  • Bad-BeatBad-Beat Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Well to be fair to the Irishman, he's most probably boning that nurse once the joke's over.

  • HoukHouk Nipples The EchidnaRegistered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Houk wrote: »
    Houk wrote: »
    Two hats are chillin' on a hat rack, when one says to the other, "Hey, you think our owner is gonna use one of us today?"
    "No idea, man. It depends on the weather. I guess one of us should check."
    "Alright, dog, you stay here, I'll go on ahead."
    a hat would never say 'dog'

    at least not the kind of hat you would find on something as classy as a hat rack

    You are thoroughly racist.
    nonsense! some of my best hats are top hats!


    Yeah, I saw your post in the camwhore thread.

    dudewithwhitetophats.jpg
    that hat had a black seamstress i tell you!

    nipplessig.jpg
  • AMP'dAMP'd Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Bad-Beat wrote: »
    Well to be fair to the Irishman, he's most probably boning that nurse once the joke's over.

    I thought it showed the Irishman in a positive light too

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • kid_zombiekid_zombie Registered User
    edited May 2009
    Bogdanich wrote: »
    to op that scene is of course from the mask (1994) at around 6 minutes in
    tiescene.png



    thanks!

    Also, yes I am in richmond. I go to VCU..

    Hang in there.


    biledriver27.png
  • Grey GhostGrey Ghost Okay... This looks bad.Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    An Englishman, an Irishman, and an Indian man are in the hospital waiting for their respective wives to give birth. After some time, the nurse walks out and says that all the births went well, but that there was a slight mix-up and they're not sure which baby is which, and could the fathers please claim their own infants?

    The Irishman goes first and immediately claims the Indian child. The nurse asks "sir, are you quite sure that one is yours?"

    The Irishman replies "no, but one of the other two is a fuckin' Englishman, and I'm not takin' that chance."

    zw3k8eu.gif
    PSN: GrahamCR
  • DarmakDarmak Godking of the Snerkywizards Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Grey Ghost wrote: »
    An Englishman, an Irishman, and an Indian man are in the hospital waiting for their respective wives to give birth. After some time, the nurse walks out and says that all the births went well, but that there was a slight mix-up and they're not sure which baby is which, and could the fathers please claim their own infants?

    The Irishman goes first and immediately claims the Indian child. The nurse asks "sir, are you quite sure that one is yours?"

    The Irishman replies "no, but one of the other two is a fuckin' Englishman, and I'm not takin' that chance."

    Hahahahaha.

    PIZTDhW.jpg
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Weaver wrote: »
    An Indian walks in to a bar and gets his license to practice law revoked for his multiple DUI convictions.

    Do you mean an Indian Indian or American Indian? This greatly affects the level of humour inherent in your attempt.

    Ranmasig5.png
  • Ness445Ness445 Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    I figured most people would think Indian from...India. Not Native American.

    4445.gif
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
  • Ness445Ness445 Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    I know Indian from India makes no sense, but regardless.

    Or am I wrong in thinking that Native American isn't the more recognized term?

    4445.gif
  • seizureorbsseizureorbs Registered User
    edited May 2009
    I only use native american

    never indian

    eyes.gif
  • AMP'dAMP'd Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    American Indians

    First Nations People

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • AneurhythmiaAneurhythmia Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Yeah, uh, it's a joke about the prevalence of alcoholism among indigenous peoples, but better get your p.c. terms straight.

    1LRdqui.png
  • Ness445Ness445 Registered User regular
    edited May 2009
    Yes goddamn it.

    Wait, what is the PC term for the indigenous people of Australia?

    4445.gif
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