Our new Indie Games subforum is now open for business in G&T. Go and check it out, you might land a code for a free game. If you're developing an indie game and want to post about it, follow these directions. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
Our rules have been updated and given their own forum. Go and look at them! They are nice, and there may be new ones that you didn't know about! Hooray for rules! Hooray for The System! Hooray for Conforming!

The Bitching About Bad Comics Thread

1356763

Comments

  • psycojesterpsycojester Registered User regular
    edited July 2009

    Also fuck Australian EVERYTHING prices.

    Fixed that for you.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • HayasaHayasa Registered User
    edited July 2009
    I dunno, the bakery near where I work does three cinnamon donuts for a dollar.

  • FencingsaxFencingsax Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I hate that for some reason I can't get into comics everyone else seems to like.

    It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends upon his not understanding it
  • psycojesterpsycojester Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Hayasa wrote: »
    I dunno, the bakery near where I work does three cinnamon donuts for a dollar.

    That is a pretty good deal.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Blingston HughesBlingston Hughes Registered User
    edited July 2009
    RE: Batman

    The thing about Batman is that he's incapable of directly killing someone on account of he's completely mental. I bet if you saw your parents brutally murdered in front of you you'd be a bit put off the whole 'murdering people' thing.

    Frank Castle's kid was just one strong gust of wind away from becoming Batman.

  • descdesc destroy all false poseur trend metal Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Between Ultimate Blob and Hulk and what's-his-name, the Venom/pretend Spider-man on Dark Avengers, I feel like Marvel is weirdly into cannibalism these days.

    What's the deal with that. It's dumb.

  • DarkWarriorDarkWarrior __BANNED USERS
    edited July 2009
    RE: Batman

    The thing about Batman is that he's incapable of directly killing someone on account of he's completely mental. I bet if you saw your parents brutally murdered in front of you you'd be a bit put off the whole 'murdering people' thing.

    Frank Castle's kid was just one strong gust of wind away from becoming Batman.

    They should do a what if on that.

    And was the symbiote ever that into cannibalism? I know that they did some versions of Venom where he needed to eat brains but the current one practically can't exist a day without eating something living.

    ...it's in the shape of a giant c**k.
  • LucascraftLucascraft Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Faynor wrote: »
    Here's one.

    Restarting series at number 1 just to get a sales push, or even more confusingly doing shoddy math to get your books up to the 600s.

    The thing that's stupidest about this, is that even if Marvel's math was right, they immediately went and fucked it up the very next month by releasing a side arc outside of their newly revised numbering system. What the hell is the point of going from issue 50 to 600 and then barfing out a series of 5 issues that don't even fit into the "correct" numbering system, but are essential to the story?

    BN_Sig3.jpg
  • KidDorkKidDork Registered User
    edited July 2009
    Re: Batman

    Another old discussion point is that James Gordon is a shitty Police Commissioner, since the crime rate in Gotham never seems to go down. Imagine living there, knowing every day that you stand a fairly good chance of being shot/frozen/tied to a giant playing card, and that every time the city's worst serial killer is caught, it's only at most two years until he gets out and racks up his body count again.

    Oh, another thing that angers me? How Marvel and DC are going the hardcover route with many titles, instead of going straight to a more affordable trade. Dark Horse at least doesn't do this as much, so yay for them.

  • DarkWarriorDarkWarrior __BANNED USERS
    edited July 2009
    Batmans whole shtick takes a pinch of salt, his entire rogues gallery is full os mass murderers who operate in a single city. By all rights, NOONE would still choose to live in Gotham City. In this country theres not a chance for a death penalty so I can see the criminals forever surviving but people staying? Not a chance.

    I guess in a city which is a parrallel of New York, the amount of people who die is so small compared to the whole that most people never come face to face with the super villains and related stuff so maybe its not as noticable.

    ...it's in the shape of a giant c**k.
  • CrimsondudeCrimsondude Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    crimsondude I can never hate you again

    Yay!

    There are a couple of things I want to defend here, but it seems inappropriate.

    Oh. I know. Fuck Brian Reed. He ruined Ms. Marvel for me and that's just wrong.

    Also, Bendis'/Hickman's movie fanboyism is aggravating as fuck. That shit drives me nuts. I do that shit when I write and I'm, well, me. A hack fan. These guys write for a living for Christ's sake.
    Faynor wrote: »
    Restarting series at number 1 just to get a sales push, or even more confusingly doing shoddy math to get your books up to the 600s.

    YES.
    Batmans whole shtick takes a pinch of salt, his entire rogues gallery is full os mass murderers who operate in a single city. By all rights, NOONE would still choose to live in Gotham City. In this country theres not a chance for a death penalty so I can see the criminals forever surviving but people staying? Not a chance.

    I guess in a city which is a parrallel of New York, the amount of people who die is so small compared to the whole that most people never come face to face with the super villains and related stuff so maybe its not as noticable.

    Well, that was Grant Morrison's thing when he was talking about B&R. That Gotham is such a large city with a lot going for it that it needs to be acknowledged. Otherwise the perpetual focus on the dark side makes it seem exactly that--a city where no one has any reason to live in.

  • SageinaRageSageinaRage Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    So this one's kind of old, but I picked up the trade for Marville when it was about 80% off on this website sale a few weeks ago, on the assumption that it was some kind of goofy humor book. MY GOD was I wrong. It has about 1 issue of lame 'humor', which is mostly making fun of Ted Turner and superman, but then it goes off into some kind of treatise on existence and god and religion and evolution and how humans were MEANT to live and why there is unhappiness and what deserves to live, and why politics and religion are the root cause of all unhappiness and it is SO BAD.

    I only paid 3 bucks for this trade, but regretted it as soon as I finish it. I kind of want to burn it so that I won't risk anyone accidentally reading it.


    edit:: also, floppies suck, trades and omnibuses 4 EVA

  • HadjiQuestHadjiQuest Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Lucascraft wrote: »
    Faynor wrote: »
    Here's one.

    Restarting series at number 1 just to get a sales push, or even more confusingly doing shoddy math to get your books up to the 600s.

    The thing that's stupidest about this, is that even if Marvel's math was right, they immediately went and fucked it up the very next month by releasing a side arc outside of their newly revised numbering system. What the hell is the point of going from issue 50 to 600 and then barfing out a series of 5 issues that don't even fit into the "correct" numbering system, but are essential to the story?

    The real stupidest thing about it is that Fantastic Four is going to be the last book to hit 600.

    You know, the book that began the 'Marvel Age of Comics.'

    If it stays monthly, it has 2 years left before reaching #600.

  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    okay, people tell me the hood mini-series may be good so I will say this this way:

    fuck the hood when written by bendis

    he is nothing special at best and horrible at worst

    everything he does is boring

  • HenslerHensler Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Fuck Frank Quitely. His art is ugly and looking at it makes me sick. His Batman looks stupid, and his crappy art prevented me from enjoying All-Star Superman.

  • HenslerHensler Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    And also, fuck anybody who didn't read either Wetworks series.

  • HenslerHensler Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Edit: And I'm totally in the wrong thread, on the wrong forum. Nevermind me.

  • The Geebs That Got BigtimedThe Geebs That Got Bigtimed Super Moderator, Moderator mod
    edited July 2009
    I hate, hate when Batman gets put in big, universe spanning events or whatever and ends up anywhere near the frontlines.

    You know what makes Batman interesting? He's a regular guy who, through determination and intelligence, has built himself into a force of justice in his town. But that gets forgotten because everyone has such a huge boner for him that he has to end up front and center of all these big events. Which, fine, I understand that, you have to sell issues, whatever. But then the next week there's a storyline where he's barely beating the Penguin, or some crime boss or something, and all I can think of "I just read a story where he got in a fistfight with Darkseid while Superman watched in awe and I'm supposed to take this story seriously?"

    And then there's the time to prepare thing. Fuck that in it's fucking ear. Not only is it the worst goddamned thing that keeps popping up over and over again on the internet, it's lazy fucking writing when it gets used. "oh no! batman's in trouble! oh wait, this was all part of his elaborate plan to deal with this exact, highly specialized situation!" (This is pretty much why I don't like Grant Morrison's Batman)

    And Tower of Babel? I don't understand why everyone loves it so much. I mean, I guess I know, but jesus, people.

    Pb6cUzZ.pngTeRnRlj.pnglBMZaaL.pnglm0oV4l.pngsw4UHsU.png
  • TexiKenTexiKen Was it Kierkegaard or Dick Van Patten who said, Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    On that note, I hated Batman RIP. Not only the story and the delays (Nightwing gets taken out like a chump just because Morrison couldn't bother to write him, and who didn't see Jezebel being a traitor?), but the way DC handled it, giving us that stupid "death-by-helicopter-crash-not-really" scene and trying to tell us we're somehow not getting it when the big Batman event doesn't even conclude in a Batman book but in Final Crisis.

    And was Hurt the devil?

    corel309-Copy_zps0390a6cc.jpg
  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Batmans whole shtick takes a pinch of salt, his entire rogues gallery is full os mass murderers who operate in a single city. By all rights, NOONE would still choose to live in Gotham City. In this country theres not a chance for a death penalty so I can see the criminals forever surviving but people staying? Not a chance.

    I guess in a city which is a parrallel of New York, the amount of people who die is so small compared to the whole that most people never come face to face with the super villains and related stuff so maybe its not as noticable.

    Isn't that kind of the whole point of Kingdom Come? That once you start killing villains for the greater good, you start down a slippery slope that eventually leads to the subjugation of all non-powered individuals?

    I also think Kingdom Come is a good example of how Batman should behave in a large scale event. Behind the scenes, coordinating, planning, and sabotaging.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • HadjiQuestHadjiQuest Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I hate, hate when Batman gets put in big, universe spanning events or whatever and ends up anywhere near the frontlines.

    You know what makes Batman interesting? He's a regular guy who, through determination and intelligence, has built himself into a force of justice in his town. But that gets forgotten because everyone has such a huge boner for him that he has to end up front and center of all these big events. Which, fine, I understand that, you have to sell issues, whatever. But then the next week there's a storyline where he's barely beating the Penguin, or some crime boss or something, and all I can think of "I just read a story where he got in a fistfight with Darkseid while Superman watched in awe and I'm supposed to take this story seriously?"

    And then there's the time to prepare thing. Fuck that in it's fucking ear. Not only is it the worst goddamned thing that keeps popping up over and over again on the internet, it's lazy fucking writing when it gets used. "oh no! batman's in trouble! oh wait, this was all part of his elaborate plan to deal with this exact, highly specialized situation!" (This is pretty much why I don't like Grant Morrison's Batman)

    And Tower of Babel? I don't understand why everyone loves it so much. I mean, I guess I know, but jesus, people.

    I like that Batman much better, but I think the reason I do is because no one really knows how to write a good, unique solo Batman story anymore. It's just the same 5 gang/syndicate plotlines rehashed over and over again for the last few years. And I'm fucking tired of his personal Rogues gallery, because most of them are one-trick ponies. I've noticed his better stories either introduce brand new villains, or completely redefine old ones. But most people don't really seem to grasp that.

  • DarkWarriorDarkWarrior __BANNED USERS
    edited July 2009
    Sentry wrote: »
    Batmans whole shtick takes a pinch of salt, his entire rogues gallery is full os mass murderers who operate in a single city. By all rights, NOONE would still choose to live in Gotham City. In this country theres not a chance for a death penalty so I can see the criminals forever surviving but people staying? Not a chance.

    I guess in a city which is a parrallel of New York, the amount of people who die is so small compared to the whole that most people never come face to face with the super villains and related stuff so maybe its not as noticable.

    Isn't that kind of the whole point of Kingdom Come? That once you start killing villains for the greater good, you start down a slippery slope that eventually leads to the subjugation of all non-powered individuals?

    I also think Kingdom Come is a good example of how Batman should behave in a large scale event. Behind the scenes, coordinating, planning, and sabotaging.

    Well Im not arguging in favour of killing them or my baby Joker would be no more. Im just saying I can let that part fly as there are people in the UK who do horrible things and theres no possibility of execution ever coming up so they wouldnt be killed just incarcerated.

    ...it's in the shape of a giant c**k.
  • HenslerHensler Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I hate that my favorite comic book writer, Warren Ellis, turned in such a mediocre book when he wrote my favorite comic book characters, the Astonishing X-Men.

  • CrimsondudeCrimsondude Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    fuck the hood when written by bendis

    :^:


    Frankly, fuck Bendis.

  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    fuck the hood when written by bendis

    :^:


    Frankly, fuck Bendis.

    Ultimate Spider-Man would like to challenge you to a duel sir. You have offended its honor. Pistols and web-shooters at dawn.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • CrimsondudeCrimsondude Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Man, Fuck Spider-Man. I haven't read a 616 spidey book in twenty years because I couldn't stand that chump. I tried Ult. SM but it didn't take, so... Whatever.

    Also, after reading the preview of Ms. Marvel #42 let me again reiterate my utter hatred for Reed.

  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    Man, Fuck Spider-Man. I haven't read a 616 spidey book in twenty years because I couldn't stand that chump. I tried Ult. SM but it didn't take, so... Whatever.

    Also, after reading the preview of Ms. Marvel #42 let me again reiterate my utter hatred for Reed.

    You're so angry... it's clear you haven't accepted Ultimate Spidey as your lord and savior. Can I have a moment to chat with you about he who has disappeared in a giant ill-conceived flood for your sins?

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • TexiKenTexiKen Was it Kierkegaard or Dick Van Patten who said, Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    So.....Loeb is the devil!

    corel309-Copy_zps0390a6cc.jpg
  • LucascraftLucascraft Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    I'm not really big on Spider-Man either. I enjoyed the films just because I tend to enjoy most super hero movies. But I don't really care at all about his monthlies. I cared more during the Civil War, but that's because I thought the unmasking was actually an interesting story. Then they ruined it. Oh, and I also liked when he was wearing the Iron Spider suit. Too bad that lasted such a short amount of time.

    BN_Sig3.jpg
  • CrimsondudeCrimsondude Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    crimsondude I can help you love spider-man again

    it's a little thing called Spidey Super Stories

    J+Is+For.jpg

  • wirehead26wirehead26 Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    crimsondude I can help you love spider-man again

    it's a little thing called Spidey Super Stories

    J+Is+For.jpg

    There are so many things wrong with this pic I dare not even try to point them out.

  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    not a single thing is wrong

    you dumb

  • SageinaRageSageinaRage Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    No talking about good comics in the bitching thread!

  • The Lovely BastardThe Lovely Bastard Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    dang I broke the rules

    geebs infract me with no points

  • KidDorkKidDork Registered User
    edited July 2009
    Jezebel reminded me of another thing I hate in comics: the build-up of love interests whose only role is to fuck over the hero, and then they disappear forever. Say what you will about Madelyne Pryor, but at least she's still around.

    Like herpes.

  • BlankspaceBlankspace __BANNED USERS
    edited July 2009
    So, I just read the preview of the new issue of Invincible.

    It really has just become Gore Porn.

    SIG.gif
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    let's not use crazy words like "become"

    i remember it sort of being a progression

    there was the brutal violence upon the MEGA REVEAL shhhhh of earlier days

    later, mark crushing
    Spoiler:

  • psycojesterpsycojester Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    okay, people tell me the hood mini-series may be good so I will say this this way:

    fuck the hood when written by bendis

    he is nothing special at best and horrible at worst

    everything he does is boring

    Ummm isn't Jeff Parker the one writing the Dark Reign: The Hood mini?

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Calamity JaneCalamity Jane That Wrong Love Registered User regular
    edited July 2009
    i think he means bendis bringing the hood into the new avengers as a major villain

This discussion has been closed.