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I got served (Law and Order: Hurf Durf Durr edition)

FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
edited November 2010 in Singularity Engine++
So yesterday I got served. Apparently I am a witness at a friends trial, and I am not happy about this in the least, no sirree. But apparently the law says I have to show up and testify!

The problem is, I honestly don't remember shit. So I can't, in all truthiness, have much to say while I'm under oath, which is bogus. What do I do, social entropy? Have you ever been

SERVED

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Fandyien on
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Posts

  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2010
    What kind of trial?

    Munkus Beaver on
    Steam name: munkus_beaver
    WiiU: munkusbeaver and Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
    Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    Twitter which gives health updates and the like: https://twitter.com/MunkusBeaver
    Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    uh

    tell them exactly what you know so you don't get thrown in lock up and get raped

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Dang Fandy.

    Just be all like "Wait, what? When? Man was I even there?"

    Burning Organ on
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    What kind of trial?

    They are charging a buddy of mine with, I think, a few felonies relating to vandalism.

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    OH SNAP! YOU GOT STAIGHT SERVED SON!

    Bedlam on
  • JoeUserJoeUser Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    uh

    tell them exactly what you know so you don't get thrown in lock up and get raped

    Pretty much this, and don't say that you did anything illegal.

    JoeUser on
    PSN: JoeUser80 Steam
  • BedlamBedlam Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Dang Fandy.

    Just be all like "Wait, what? When? Man was I even there?"
    So do what he already does 24/7 gotcha.

    Bedlam on
  • UbikUbik i am a god in a french-ass restaurantRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Tell the truth

    Ubik on
    CleezusSig_zpsfa821add.png
  • JoeUserJoeUser Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    yougotservedsuperdodgeb.png

    JoeUser on
    PSN: JoeUser80 Steam
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • ZonugalZonugal Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2l-04AcK3Bk

    You have to go double or nothing.

    Zonugal on
    Andrew_WK_Sig.jpg
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    then the truth is you don't remember, and that what the statement says is probably correct

    this is not difficult

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Also I was personally served by the prosecutor and a detective.

    The detective told me I "looked good" and had "lost weight"

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Yeah just be 100% honest.

    We've seen your pictures.

    Do you know what will happen to you in prison?

    Viscount Islands on
    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    Also I was personally served by the prosecutor and a detective.

    The detective told me I "looked good" and had "lost weight"

    they're hitting on you bro

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    I now know exactly what is going to happen to you in court.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Steam name: munkus_beaver
    WiiU: munkusbeaver and Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
    Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    Twitter which gives health updates and the like: https://twitter.com/MunkusBeaver
    Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Yeah just be 100% honest.

    We've seen your pictures.

    Do you know what will happen to you in prison?

    I

    I'll beat someone up on the first day and everyone will think I'm crazy?

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    Yeah just be 100% honest.

    We've seen your pictures.

    Do you know what will happen to you in prison?

    I

    I'll beat someone up on the first day and everyone will think I'm crazy?

    no, you'll get raped and then the AB will offer you protection in exchange for oral sex or a drug hookup

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    I now know exactly what is going to happen to you in court.

    This is pretty disconcerting, especiallly since, if I remember correctly, you are ye olde law student right

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • JoeUserJoeUser Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    then the truth is you don't remember, and that what the statement says is probably correct

    this is not difficult

    snoopydealwithit0550969.jpg

    JoeUser on
    PSN: JoeUser80 Steam
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    Yeah just be 100% honest.

    We've seen your pictures.

    Do you know what will happen to you in prison?

    I

    I'll beat someone up on the first day and everyone will think I'm crazy?

    No, you'll get made into a wife. Or you might resist and then they'll wait for you behind a pillar, poke you with a ice pick and pull as much as your guts out as possible.

    Viscount Islands on
    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • UbikUbik i am a god in a french-ass restaurantRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    I now know exactly what is going to happen to you in court.

    Man I show know this, I'm taking Evidence this semester

    I guess it depends on the statement and what it's being introduced for

    Ubik on
    CleezusSig_zpsfa821add.png
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Guys, if I get shivved, remember me as a man of action.

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    I now know exactly what is going to happen to you in court.

    This is pretty disconcerting, especiallly since, if I remember correctly, you are ye olde law student right

    the defense will pick you and your statement apart and make you look like an idiot to create reasonable doubt

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Oh, good. I want the defense to prevail because I don't even want to testify against a friend much less see him get thrown in prison!

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    Guys, if I get shivved, remember me as a man of action.

    I'll remember you as the dude who finally seemed to get his life back on track before he was taken away by Our Lord, The God.

    Burning Organ on
  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Fandyien wrote: »
    Guys, if I get shivved, remember me as a man of action.
    fandyien was the sort of dude who posted his dilemmas on the internet

    Snowbeat on
    Q1e6oi8.gif
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Internet kenobi

    You're my only hope

    Fandyien on
    reposig.jpg
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited November 2010
    Ubik wrote: »
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    I now know exactly what is going to happen to you in court.

    Man I show know this, I'm taking Evidence this semester

    I guess it depends on the statement and what it's being introduced for
    Refreshing his memory.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Steam name: munkus_beaver
    WiiU: munkusbeaver and Nintendo ID (3DS thinger): 0619-4510-9772
    Blizzard thing: munkus#1952
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    Twitter which gives health updates and the like: https://twitter.com/MunkusBeaver
    Please give to the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America: http://www.ccfa.org/
  • UbikUbik i am a god in a french-ass restaurantRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Don't forget to yell OBJECTION! HEARSAY! (Don't do that)

    Ubik on
    CleezusSig_zpsfa821add.png
  • ThatDudeOverThereThatDudeOverThere Clock King Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    it was nice knowing you, fandy

    ThatDudeOverThere on
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I MURDERED HIM! IT WAS FOR LOVE

    Fandyien on
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  • DichotomyDichotomy Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    end every sentence with the phrase "to the best of my recollection"

    Dichotomy on
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  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    walk in blazed

    Snowbeat on
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  • UbikUbik i am a god in a french-ass restaurantRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Ubik wrote: »
    Fandyien wrote: »
    You see the truth is I don't remember but they have a statement from like almost a year ago they expect me to corroborate and I'm all 'I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE'

    I now know exactly what is going to happen to you in court.

    Man I show know this, I'm taking Evidence this semester

    I guess it depends on the statement and what it's being introduced for
    Refreshing his memory.

    Ah, Past Recollection Refreshed

    But he may still not remember after being shown the statement

    Ubik on
    CleezusSig_zpsfa821add.png
  • FandyienFandyien But Otto, what about us? Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    I've already been shown my statement. Also they were pretty insistent I wasn't in any trouble unless I failed to show quit scaring me you jerks

    Fandyien on
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  • cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Chantry of NightmaresRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
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    cj iwakura on
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    赤い月 赤い月 罪を 犯した 者共の 穢れを 清める | Kill The Past
  • Viscount IslandsViscount Islands [INSERT SoKo HERE] Registered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Bring a boombox and in the middle of your cross-examination play this at full blast.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdIlP488n14

    Viscount Islands on
    I want to do with you
    What spring does with the cherry trees.
  • JimothyJimothy Not in front of the fox he's with the owlRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    Zonugal wrote: »
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2l-04AcK3Bk

    You have to go double or nothing.

    I honestly thought this thread was going to be about dancing.

    Jimothy on
    Owlsig.jpg
  • SnowbeatSnowbeat i need something to kick this thing's ass over the lineRegistered User regular
    edited November 2010
    that's what they always say

    wear yo vest to court son

    Snowbeat on
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