The New Comic Thread for Friday, December 24th

Edcrab · December 2010

You know, my sister says she learned when she was 8 and was pissed off about it, but I can't really remember the circumstances of my Santa-revelation.

So I don't think I cared all that much, and it was probably a gradual thing.

Goatmon · December 2010

Speed Racer wrote: »

I really don't remember it being a big deal when I found out santa and such was fake

just kinda "oh, huh. Oh well I still get presents right?"

For me it was a slower realization after some kid at at the playground tried to convince me Santa was bullshit.

I got all mad at him, but eventually just sort of accepted the fact.

I never got upset at my family for the deception, honestly. I don't know why I would. It was just a way of making the holidays more fun for me, and for my sisters when they were little.

The whole Santa thing was pretty fun to buy into when I was little enough to believe it, and I have nothing but happy memories of those times.

Houk · December 2010

I can't remember ever believing in Santa. Like my mom would label some presents as from Santa but I can't remember if she ever made any real attempt to convince us he was real. I know my mom didn't like to bullshit around with us, she was always pretty straightforward, so I have a feeling she basically just did it and winked and we all had fun with it

ThreadbareSock · December 2010

I suppose there was a period where my parents tried to keep up the ruse, but they got divorced when I was like five, and I don't ever recall believing he was real. It's probably infeasible to maintain the myth when the kid visits two different homes.

jaziek · December 2010

Controvertial Comic.

I'd love to read some of the emails they get after this one.

Houk wrote: »

I can't remember ever believing in Santa. Like my mom would label some presents as from Santa but I can't remember if she ever made any real attempt to convince us he was real. I know my mom didn't like to bullshit around with us, she was always pretty straightforward, so I have a feeling she basically just did it and winked and we all had fun with it

But yeah, basically this.

Newtron · December 2010

I remember when I found out Santa wasn't real.

1st grade, kids all laughin "you still believe in Santa?".

"er...no?".

And that's what's wrong with our public school system.

GRMike · December 2010

TIS' THE SEASON!

Desktop Hippie · December 2010

Edcrab wrote: »

You know, my sister says she learned when she was 8 and was pissed off about it, but I can't really remember the circumstances of my Santa-revelation.

So I don't think I cared all that much, and it was probably a gradual thing.

Yup, same here. I don't have any memory of a single moment when I stopped believing in Santa. I was never angry with my parents for lying to me either. It had all been so much fun, it never even crossed my mind that I should be mad at them.

I *do* remember a phase in school where older kids were asking me if I believed in Santa and I steadfastly told them that of course I didn't while in my head I was telepathically telling Santa I *did* believe in him really, I just didn't want these kids bothering me. So hey, I learned spinelessness and hypocrisy at a nice, early age :^:

BlackDove · December 2010

GRMike wrote: »

TIS' THE SEASON!

First thing I thought of because of the title.

Edcrab · December 2010

Desktop Hippie wrote: »

I *do* remember a phase in school where older kids were asking me if I believed in Santa and I steadfastly told them that of course I didn't while in my head I was telepathically telling Santa I *did* believe in him really, I just didn't want these kids bothering me. So hey, I learned spinelessness and hypocrisy at a nice, early age :^:

Hahahaha

Well, of course Santa has psionic abilities! He telekinetically levitates the deer, it all makes sense!

Sir Platypus · December 2010

First clue for me was my brother returning a gift from Santa, as well as seeing boxes from toys he brought in the attic.

I was pretty unphased.

I was more upset when my parents stopped leaving out gifts from Santa and just wrapped everything instead. Makes Christmas a little less "magic" I guess.

Also the comic is a bit of a downer.

Burden of Proof · December 2010

I never believed in Santa.

All my gifts were from Jesus.

Desktop Hippie · December 2010

Edcrab wrote: »

Desktop Hippie wrote: »

I *do* remember a phase in school where older kids were asking me if I believed in Santa and I steadfastly told them that of course I didn't while in my head I was telepathically telling Santa I *did* believe in him really, I just didn't want these kids bothering me. So hey, I learned spinelessness and hypocrisy at a nice, early age :^:

Hahahaha

Well, of course Santa has psionic abilities! He telekinetically levitates the deer, it all makes sense!

I was so damn earnest about it too. I do believe in you Santa! I do I do I do! Please still bring me presents!

kingworks · December 2010

*checks watch*

I guess it was about time for yet another reminder of how being a person of faith puts me at odds, at least on some level, with the majority of people I encounter online.

Edcrab · December 2010

Desktop Hippie wrote: »

Edcrab wrote: »

Desktop Hippie wrote: »

I *do* remember a phase in school where older kids were asking me if I believed in Santa and I steadfastly told them that of course I didn't while in my head I was telepathically telling Santa I *did* believe in him really, I just didn't want these kids bothering me. So hey, I learned spinelessness and hypocrisy at a nice, early age :^:

Hahahaha

Well, of course Santa has psionic abilities! He telekinetically levitates the deer, it all makes sense!

I was so damn earnest about it too. I do believe in you Santa! I do I do I do! Please still bring me presents!

Then I guess it is like prayer to some extent, except it's the Claus instead of the almighty that you're trying to reason with!

What's more worrying to a young mind, a life without presents or an afterlife of damnation?

Hunter · December 2010

Edcrab wrote: »

Desktop Hippie wrote: »

Edcrab wrote: »

Desktop Hippie wrote: »

I *do* remember a phase in school where older kids were asking me if I believed in Santa and I steadfastly told them that of course I didn't while in my head I was telepathically telling Santa I *did* believe in him really, I just didn't want these kids bothering me. So hey, I learned spinelessness and hypocrisy at a nice, early age :^:

Hahahaha

Well, of course Santa has psionic abilities! He telekinetically levitates the deer, it all makes sense!

I was so damn earnest about it too. I do believe in you Santa! I do I do I do! Please still bring me presents!

Then I guess it is like prayer to some extent, except it's the Claus instead of the almighty that you're trying to reason with!

What's more worrying to a young mind, a life without presents or an afterlife of damnation?

It kind of depends on which religion you're growing up in. As a Roman Catholic, I was made quiet aware of my damnation pretty early in life. They made sure to tell me about the special realm of pain and fire and torture and burning and getting raped by demon bees while soaking in a boiling lake of piss, but because god loves me all I have to do is show devotion and we're cool with each other.

That's a lot to grab onto as an eight year old. Presents once a year was no big thing.

Edcrab · December 2010

Jeez. I kept thinking about hell as an abstract concept, but if you're going to tell your kids about it and evocatively outline exactly what'll happen, well...

...yeah, I can see why kids would fear damnation.

2 Marcus 2 Ravens · December 2010

I am Santa.

This is a good comic.

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho

Darth Waiter · December 2010

Just gonna throw my two cents in here: kids are really trusting, but they're not stupid. Every child in my generation in my family has done the math and figured out that Santa isn't real by the age of six.

BoomShake · December 2010

I remember when I found out about the Claus and his lack of existence. While the minor details slip my mind, I was very persistent with the questioning, refusing to take the empty or diversionary responses. Then my dad took me for a drive and gave me a straight answer. At that moment, it clicked that the Easter Bunny, Toothfairy, et. al must not be real either. It all came crashing down like a house of cards.

For a moment, I was devastated, but not angry. It was at that point where my father brought up the fact that now that I know, I can help keep the magic alive for my younger sister. Not only would I be doing something that brought a lot of joy to my sister, but I got to be like the adults, which was sooooo cooool at the time.

I'd say that for an entire childhood of magic and wonder, twenty minutes of crushing sadness, then an entire lifetime of making the magic happen and seeing faces light up, the Santa myth is OK in my book.

Now the drift away from the Catholic Church, that was a much harsher shaking of my core.

Darth Waiter · December 2010

kingworks wrote: »

*checks watch*

I guess it was about time for yet another reminder of how being a person of faith puts me at odds, at least on some level, with the majority of people I encounter online.

Not necessarily. I'm good friends with a devout atheist from these very forums. We may have our differences, but we still get along really well.

A duck! · December 2010

kingworks wrote: »

*checks watch*

I guess it was about time for yet another reminder of how being a person of faith puts me at odds, at least on some level, with the majority of people I encounter online.

Is that cross heavy enough for you or should we find a larger one?

Jars · December 2010

no one told me santa didn't exist, I kinda figured it out on my own by realizing the entire thing was ridiculous.

Spectre-x · December 2010

I can remember believing in Sinterklaas (the Dutch version of the whole Saint Nicholas whatever, who is much cooler because his arrival is actually televised every year) and I can remember my parents getting in trouble during my first year of elementary school because I'd been acting like a little shit and telling all the other 4-to-5-year-olds that there was no such thing as Sinterklaas, but I can't actually remember if anyone ever told me that he wasn't real.

I very much doubt I cared, though, or I'd have remembered. I still got presents, and the whole theatrical side of it was fun as hell, like a big game of make-believe, so I was fine either way.

Baidol · December 2010

Odds are good that tomorrow, at the age of 23, I am going to get presents from Santa.

Santa is pretty awesome.

KalTorak · December 2010

Well, after reading this comic, my 4-year-old is now crying on the floor. Thanks a lot, Gabe and Tycho.

Shabooty · December 2010

I might not believe in santa, but I'd be disappointed if my presents aren't signed 'From: Santa'

SwissLion · December 2010

Shabooty that is an excellent av/sig

Dubh · December 2010

Shabooty wrote: »

I might not believe in santa, but I'd be disappointed if my presents aren't signed 'From: Santa'

you're alright, Shabootsy Collins

Deciheximal · December 2010

The internet is kind of like a giant public restroom, only instead of just religious pamphlets people also leave notes spreading common sense.

babyeatingjesus · December 2010

This is one of my favourite comics in a long time.

BlueBlue · December 2010

I don't have any strong memories about Santa re: realizations and confrontations. I have a vague memory of having a present from Santa and thinking "I wonder who actually got me this, ah well trying to find out won't get anywhere". Potentially one of the cousins on the Jewish side of the family told; that kind of thing would be right up their alley.

I can hear G&T having this exact conversation, but my mind can't even fathom the levels in rabble-rousing necessary to drop that "same as God" line. I also can't believe their giant balls for posting it.

Rorus Raz · December 2010

You said it yourself, Gabe.

Daddy lies.

Munkus Beaver · December 2010

I was in the van on the way home from school. I was a very naive kid. The other kids in the van were asking me if I really still believed in santa. I was stammering and didn't know what to say in response. My mother, who was driving the car, said, "No, he doesn't believe Santa is real."

And that was the end of my Santa belief.

Black_Heart · December 2010

When my children start questioning if Santa is real I will tell them that he DOES exist... he is a manifestation of goodwill, giving, and caring within humanity. Santa is a sunrise, is a warm hug, he is joy and laughter and friendship. As long as those things exist, he too exists.

BlueBlue · December 2010

Black_Heart wrote: »

When my children start questioning if Santa is real I will tell them that he DOES exist... he is a manifestation of goodwill, giving, and caring within humanity. Santa is a sunrise, is a warm hug, he is joy and laughter and friendship. As long as those things exist, he too exists.

Haha nope it's as long as there is fun there will always be Coca-Cola (for which Santa is a mascot)

Black_Heart · December 2010

BlueBlue wrote: »

Black_Heart wrote: »

When my children start questioning if Santa is real I will tell them that he DOES exist... he is a manifestation of goodwill, giving, and caring within humanity. Santa is a sunrise, is a warm hug, he is joy and laughter and friendship. As long as those things exist, he too exists.

Haha nope it's as long as there is fun there will always be Coca-Cola (for which Santa is a mascot)

That too.

Couscous · December 2010

Edcrab wrote: »

Jeez. I kept thinking about hell as an abstract concept, but if you're going to tell your kids about it and evocatively outline exactly what'll happen, well...

...yeah, I can see why kids would fear damnation.

Dawkins meets the psychologist Jill Mytton who suffered an abusive religious upbringing in the Exclusive Brethren[9] – she now helps to rehabilitate similarly affected children. Mytton explains how, for a child, images of hell fire are in no sense metaphorical, but instead inspire real terror. She portrays her own childhood as one "dominated by fear". When pressed by Dawkins to describe the realities of Hell, Mytton hesitates, explaining that the images of eternal damnation which she absorbed as a child still have the power to affect her now.

Then Dawkins visits Pastor Keenan Roberts, who has been running the Hell House Outreach program for 15 years, producing theatre shows aimed at giving children of twelve or older an indelible impression that "sin destroys". We see rehearsal scenes depicting doctors forcing an abortion on a woman despite her changing her mind, and a lesbian gay marriage ceremony presided over by Satan in which the women swear to “never believe that you are normal” and Satan cites First Corinthians 6 as God saying homosexuality equals sin. Roberts absolutely and unapologetically believes the scriptures about sin, and when Dawkins questions this basis for morality, replies that it is a faith issue.

Hell evocatively described is part and parcel of many religious groups in the US.

vsove · December 2010

I plan to tell my kids for a while that there is a Santa Claus.

And then, one day, I will hide behind the Christmas tree. On Christmas morning, when my children rush downstairs to open presents, I shall leap out, tear off my fake beard and yell

'I AM THE CLAUS'.

Munkus Beaver · December 2010

My favorite trick is telling a kid that you are calling Santa when you are really calling information.

"I'm letting him know you've been naughty!"

*THE TIME WILL BE EIGHT OH FOUR PEE EM*

"He sounds upset!"

*BEEP*

Penny Arcade

The New Comic Thread for Friday, December 24th

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