In QFG5 I can't understand anybody actually choosing Erana over Katrina. At the end of QFG4 you're in love with her and she sacrifices herself to save you. Erana was a great person and all, but you don't actually know her.
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augustwhere you come from is goneRegistered Userregular
edited March 2011
The "romance" with Katrina was pretty forced. And also, she was pretty into summoning a Lovecraftian horror to eat the sun. That's not cool!
Wow this takes me back. I loved the hell out of these games when I was a kid, and I thought all the jokes were hysterical, even when I didn't understand them. Now I just find them really annoying. Like, I want to start yelling "NEEEERRRDDSS!" at the programmers who wrote them.
Wow this takes me back. I loved the hell out of these games when I was a kid, and I thought all the jokes were hysterical, even when I didn't understand them. Now I just find them really annoying. Like, I want to start yelling "NEEEERRRDDSS!" at the programmers who wrote them.
In QFG5 I can't understand anybody actually choosing Erana over Katrina. At the end of QFG4 you're in love with her and she sacrifices herself to save you. Erana was a great person and all, but you don't actually know her.
Erana is the better person. But even beyond that, there's a very good reason to pick her.
If it weren't for Dragon Age 2, I really think I would do a LP of the complete powergaming jerk hero.
I could even game the system and do whatever I want in 2 but become a Paladin in 3 by just picking it as my import class
gjaustin on
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Librarian's ghostLibrarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSporkRegistered Userregular
edited March 2011
I remember finding it cool in QG5 when I realize that the only way to be a real classical hero in the game is to be a wizard.
There are specific tasks for a person to become a classical hero and you go though all of them except for the last one, sacrifice yourself. I never did it but if you picked Katrina and got the thermonuclear spell in the final fight you could tell everyone to escape and nuke the dragon and yourself.
I remember finding it cool in QG5 when I realize that the only way to be a real classical hero in the game is to be a wizard.
There are specific tasks for a person to become a classical hero and you go though all of them except for the last one, sacrifice yourself. I never did it but if you picked Katrina and got the thermonuclear spell in the final fight you could tell everyone to escape and nuke the dragon and yourself.
Sacrifice options are fine in games, but the dragon isn't all that tough to beat the shit out of anyway so why would I want do die?
I guess if that's the ending you want for your character...
Awake and happy from a fresh night's sleep in Erana's Garden, we head over to the healer's house to sell off our loots.
Why yes. Yes I am a hero. Thank you for noticing. Also thank you for the healing potions and the coins!
So here's the "fun" part. You take a claw, click it on her, and it sells. Then you do it again, and it sells. This is a screenshot after I already sold 10 of them. Yeah. That was boring.
Getting rather sick of these flying hell monsters. I'm gonna grab a few rocks and throw them at it's corpse. Yanno, stress relief.
That's probably enough rock throwing.
Man, did yet another goblin sneak out of its hideout? I feel some pretty stank hot breath behind me.
....uh oh
I recognize this...the mighty terrorsaurus rex! And I'm not even at full health and stamina. Time to do what a fighter hero's gotta do.
I'm taking him down, that's what I'm doing...
I gaze at the fallen foe, giving it the honor of one who fought fiercely, then died in battle.
The Ogre says "My loincloth is too tight!"
After another day and night of training, we return to the first foe we fought, the one who had us in the dirt after only a few seconds. The dreaded, fearsome, Weapon Master
He's either a dick, or a stickler for protocol
Yeah, figured that one out myself!
Asking about Elsa...yeah leaning more in the "he's a dick" direction.
Yep. Totally.
At any rate I'm not here to banter with you, I'm here to train. And lets begin...
At least he's a stickler for protocol during fighting.
I have to take a moment out here to admit I had to go look up how to defeat this bastard. What you are witnessing is actually my 5th attempt, and my stats are maxed out. I learned, after some searching, that your carried item weight actually has an effect on your combat ability. So I dropped my armor, potions, and a few other things weighing me down (not the sword and shield obviously) and was able to defeat him after that. I can only imagine this is a problem in the VGA version, but I really don't know.
Finally, the Weaponmaster cries "ENOUGH!"
Holy hell, this guy is a sore loser. Didn't he realize that he sparring against the soon to be hero of Spielburg and the surrounding lands?
By the way, if you want a soundtrack to the sets, go here. They've got all the MIDIs from the entire series.
I was actually looking for that site earlier to post it, but thought it was a different site. I downloaded the music a few years back (and I'm listening to it now).
I remember finding it cool in QG5 when I realize that the only way to be a real classical hero in the game is to be a wizard.
There are specific tasks for a person to become a classical hero and you go though all of them except for the last one, sacrifice yourself. I never did it but if you picked Katrina and got the thermonuclear spell in the final fight you could tell everyone to escape and nuke the dragon and yourself.
All the classes can sacrifice themselves. The Wizard just has the most over-the-top version. The fallout of which probably turns the island into a radioactive wasteland anyway.
You're right, that is similar to Princess Bride. Excellent music though...
Yeah QFG helped introduce me to good video game music. I'd have to say what got me hooked on video game music, though, was a friend of the family who had a Roland M32 (or whatever) synth, and damn did the music from various games sound good on that.
By the way, if you want a soundtrack to the sets, go here. They've got all the MIDIs from the entire series.
I was actually looking for that site earlier to post it, but thought it was a different site. I downloaded the music a few years back (and I'm listening to it now).
The "Hero's March" is favorite piece of music from all of gaming history. I played these games so many god damn times as a kid so that helps explain it a little.
Man, I never get tired of watching LP's of the Quest for Glory series. It really kills me that there haven't been any attempts to ressurect this series.
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MorninglordI'm tired of being Batman,so today I'll be Owl.Registered Userregular
edited March 2011
Wow that weapon master.
He does not know of the "way".
Morninglord on
(PSN: Morninglord) (Steam: Morninglord) (WiiU: Morninglord22) I like to record and toss up a lot of random gaming videos here.
Wow this takes me back. I loved the hell out of these games when I was a kid, and I thought all the jokes were hysterical, even when I didn't understand them. Now I just find them really annoying. Like, I want to start yelling "NEEEERRRDDSS!" at the programmers who wrote them.
You may want to skip the next update then...
Oh I know. I'm prepared. I remember how punilicious he was the end finale for all these games was.
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Librarian's ghostLibrarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSporkRegistered Userregular
Man, I never get tired of watching LP's of the Quest for Glory series. It really kills me that there haven't been any attempts to ressurect this series.
Well Telltale is making a King's Quest game so there is a chance that eventually they may also make a Quest for Glory and Space Quest. Personally I'd rather have them make a Space Quest.
The "Hero's March" is favorite piece of music from all of gaming history. I played these games so many god damn times as a kid so that helps explain it a little.
I fully admit to having whistled it (the short version) a few times IRL, it's a spirited little tune. The series overall has some pretty great music. QFG4 is my favorite soundtrack from it; and it's available through the Quest Studios site.
MrVyngaard on
"now I've got this mental image of caucuses as cafeteria tables in prison, and new congressmen having to beat someone up on inauguration day." - Raiden333
Man, I never get tired of watching LP's of the Quest for Glory series. It really kills me that there haven't been any attempts to ressurect this series.
For a while there, Infamous Adventures was working on a series called Quest for Infamy, which would have been a sort of spiritual sequel to these games except with the intent of becoming a world-ruling villain. Sadly, they stopped working on it and have instead finished a KQ3 remake and are nearly finished with their SQ2 remake.
I've been trying to come up with an idea for XNA game...
Bah, who am I kidding - I'm too lazy to do that
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Custom SpecialI know I am, I'm sure I am,I'm Sounders 'til I die!Registered Userregular
edited March 2011
Love your LPs josh. They're even better when its video and we get to hear your supple tones, but it's way easier to scroll through this stuff on my phone when I'm bored rather than trying to load videos with low reception.
Love your LPs josh. They're even better when its video and we get to hear your supple tones, but it's way easier to scroll through this stuff on my phone when I'm bored rather than trying to load videos with low reception.
D'awww
Don't worry, though, there's a video LP on the way right after this one!
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RentI'm always rightFuckin' deal with itRegistered Userregular
Yeah, that's me. Just making the forest safe for... well, the only other person I've ever seen in it is Bruno, and some brigands. So I guess I'm making it safe for them.
I'm going to climb the fuck out of you, tree.
It gets boring clicking on the tree over and over. I set the start button of my Xbox 360 controller to Enter in Xpadder, and toggle it on, then walk away for a while. This is high-tech stuff. Back in the day you'd just set something heavy on your keyboard, or tape down the enter key.
Looking good. Looking good. Like I said, normally I'd obsessively max things out but that's easy enough (and more interesting) to do in QFG2, so let's beat this bitch.
But first, let's pick up a few of the things we missed along the way.
Well thanks. That's awful nice of you. I still have no idea how to play cribbage, though.
Yeah like I said this sucks. Erana's Peace doesn't cost a ration and recharges everything no matter how little sleep you actually get there.
And you don't have to play cribbage, either.
Right.
OH SHIT IT'S THE LAND OF THE LOST
Spell cast!
Waste?! Do you know how many steaks I can make out of this thing? I'm going to eat like a king!
It's... a bouncing jelly bowling pin? With red eyes? Well whatever. This thing is clearly a monster. A... really annoying, bouncy monster. And I'm a hero, so I've gotta kill it. It can't be any tougher than that Rex I just slaughtered.
Okay Antwerp. Just tell me where your face is so I can stab it.
Well, it's not here anymore. I guess that means I win. Yeah... yeah! Run away you coward! And don't come back or you'll get more of the same!
OH SHI-
We hold our dagger above our heads, desperately.
Huh. So that's how these things reproduce. So... did I just have sex or something?
All right enough of this nonsense. We find the keyhole in the rock, exactly where Bruno said it would be during his little covert meeting.
We use the toolkit, and not the key we took off the brigand. Practice makes perfect.
By the way, this is the toughest Pick Locks check in the game. You get as many tries as you want, though, as opposed to the safe, where it's three strikes and you're dead.
Yes! Brigands, here I come. Wait, what's that shadow hiding in the cave ahead? Oh yeah, I'm supposed to say the 'word'. What was that again? Klaatu... barada... noose... necktie... I think it was an "N" word. Oh wait! I remember!
Yes! Thank you, gingko biloba!
Nothing here now that we made the troll go away (it's just a standard troll battle like we've done before).
A minotaur! I remember reading about these guys back in the Famous Adventurer's Sneaking 101 course.
All right, so as long as I don't make any loud noises, I should be fine.
Side note here: Magic Users can either fight the minotaur with their spells/dagger or cast calm, which puts Toro to sleep, and then they can safely walk into the clearing, cast open on the gate and walk right into the brigand's fortress. Making any noise on this screen, though, guarantees that the next will be filled with brigands who shoot arrows at you while you try to get across, constantly draining your health.
Hyup! Up and over.
Hm, nothing suspicious here. I'll just walk over this lovely rug.
Huh huh... booby
Fine then! I'll just walk around it and over this sturdy-looking bridge!
NYAAAAAAAA
REWIND TIME FWWWOOOOSHWWWOOP
Oh come on. You guys must have been watching some old slapstick comedies or something. These traps are painfully obvious. Still, I'd better get a close look and make sure I don't make a doofus out of myself.
Using the Look icon on the stretched ropes will keep you from dying by touching them.
Made it through! Surely the brigand leader is behind this door.
Nope, just a mess hall. At least the only brigand is asleep, I should be able to pass eas-- aw shit. I hear footsteps. Time to buckle my swash!
Aha! I have used your security measures against you!
Yes, technology is a fickle mistress. The same things you would have used to keep me out are keeping you out! ...Okay, they're gone.
Letting the brigands see you do this next step alerts them to your scheme and they just take the other way around.
I knew it! So you're the stooges behind the stupid traps out there!
Topple it too early and they just walk around.
Yeah! We kicked the shit out of them. We even closed the door on the other side of the room as it was being opened by the stupid brigands who had to walk all the way around again!
Screw you guys. I know the leader is behind this door.
All right, sorry you guys. This is about halfway through the end sequence, but the other pictures are still uploading and there's a lot of transcribing to be done in this next section. I'll get the rest done tomorrow. For realsies. Promise.
Actually come to think about it, the endgames in ALL of them are fantastic. But QFG1 just has the right mix of humor and puzzle solving and excellence.
Actually come to think about it, the endgames in ALL of them are fantastic. But QFG1 just has the right mix of humor and puzzle solving and excellence.
I'm partial to QFG2's endgame sequence myself
EDIT: Getting the last bit of QFG1 done right now, and maybe I'll get started on QFG2 today.
Job hunting, or just sight-seeing? I foresee a brilliant future for you in the fall. If you've got something to say, then speak fast or forever hold your pieces. State your case before I case your estate!
Shut the fuck up, Yorick.
You know me? Then perhaps you have come to help. Perhaps you are able to take the child from the band. Alas, poor Yorick! I know me well.
Shut. The. Fuck--
Ten years ago, I swore I would find Elsa no matter what. It took me two years to find her, here with the brigands, and I've posed as her warlock ever since. I couldn't break the spell on her, nor could I leave her to grow up into an attractive woman surrounded by rogues and scoundrels.
Ha! Ten years and you couldn't even make a dispel potion. Some "warlock" you are. It took me less than two weeks to get all my shit together, and I didn't even start with any spells! You suck, Yorick.
Someone had to defend her honor!
Whatever helps you sleep at night. Anyway, I'm here to help Elsa since you clearly are incapable of doing anything except telling bad jokes.
It's about time that someone else helped Elsa before it's too late! Toro and I are the only friends she's got here. Toro is the minotaur that guards this fortress. Elsa found him when he was just a calf, and he's kowtowed to her ever since. He guarantees that the brigands won't give Elsa any bull.
Wait, so the minotaur is her friend too? Couldn't he have "defended her honor" while you actually did something substantial? I guess all those puns aren't going to write themselves. More reward money for me, I guess.
She's a lot like her dad, though. She organized these brigands and changed them from mere thugs into major raiders! She plans to move the entire band away from the valley as soon as the snow clears. If that happens, I know she will never be disenchanted.
Okay, I get it. So it's important that someone who has a Dispel potion gets to her in time. I just so happen to have a Dispel potion, so how's about letting me in on the secret of getting through this room?
I'll protect the Brigand Leader with everything I've got. That's no laughing matter as I get madder. This room is my way of keeping the brigands from bothering the Leader about raises, since it tends to raze the brigands. I designed it myself! This place has people rolling in the aisles.
But... don't you want me to help Elsa? That's what I'm here for, you know. I'm not going to hurt her. Just tell me which door to go through.
There are plenty of doors. You wouldn't want me to spoil your fun, now! Either you'll figure it out in the end, or you'll end it before you're out.
So basically the game designers made a puzzle in this room and they want me to figure it out no matter what. Thanks for nothing, you laughing jackass. Can't you tell me anything helpful?
I borrowed a Magic Mirror from a friend to try to break the spell, but it only works when spells are cast directly at you. If you're going to be the big Hero, I hope you brought a Dispel Potion or something. The true Dispel Potion will break an enchantment. You must splash the potion on Elsa as soon as you can, or she'll skewer you for sure. She's more than a match for old 'Swordy Lordy' now!
God dammit, do you even listen to me? Am I talking to myself? But thanks for letting me know about the mirror. And who is this 'Swordy Lordy' character?
You must know the 'Blade Braggart'. He used to show off in the castle courtyard all the time. Elsa once asked if 'Rapier Ruler' would teach her to use the sword, and the 'Sword Bore' told her he would not waste his talent on females. She came to me in tears. After all, she was only nine at the time. She can teach old 'Weapon Windbag' a thing or two now! Her arm is true, and she's truly disarming.
Okay, okay, enough about the Weapon Master. Tell me more about the mirror.
Ah yes, the 'Mirror with the Leer' as Erasmus calls it (or was it Fenrus?) It reflects a spell back on the caster of the spell. Now where did I put that mirror... was it on the desk in Elsa's office or else in the office on Elsa's desk?
God, you're worse than Erasmus. I'm leaving now.
That's funny, I feel a strong gravitational pull downward.
YAAAAAAARG
Okay, so if you take a wrong path, you instantly fall off the ledge. There's no pathfinding on this screen either, so you have to take very delicate steps or you'll end up rolling on the right hand side. Falling takes a little of your health off, and it's possible (although unlikely) you'll die if it happens enough times. Clicking the hand on yourself or the floor stops you from rolling.
Like so.
You son of a bitch. If I wasn't trying to be a hero I'd kill you. All right, let's try this door.
YOU PEEEEENIS WIIIIIIPE
*some time later*
The door on the right gives you this message, and then you end up...
Here.
Pulling the chain is the next correct action.
For some reason taking the correct steps pisses Yorick off, and he gets up and pulls a Phoenix Wright on you.
At a certain point he begins throwing things at you, like meeps or scrolls. This knocks the hero back a little bit, and could possibly knock him off the edge. So you need to work fast before this happens or you'll be back to square one. Alternatively, you can threaten him with a throwing dagger or flame spell and he'll teleport away, giving you free reign of the room.
If you've never played the game before, this room is kind of annoying.
Back through the door and you need to hurry through the one the chain opened. Trying to open it before you pull the chain just reveals a brick wall in your way.
Finally, we're over here next to this little tiny door.
Interacting with it starts it shaking a little bit, and you've got to get out of the way, similar to the 'ermit cave door.
Finally, the final door is finally revealed. Finally.
I honestly don't know why Yorick doesn't help you through this room. It seems sort of counter-intuitive to his goals. Whatever.
You know what? I bet this goes on forever. There is no Brigand Leader room behind this door or any other door for that matter.
Ha, ha! You must be the brigand leader, Elsa. I am here to rescue you!
What, you want to fight me? Silly girl, I can kill trolls! What makes you think you are any match for HURRRK
*SPLORRRRCH*
Taking too long to do anything, or taking any action besides throwing the Dispel Potion results in your instant death. Do not under any circumstances come to the brigand fortress without the Potion or you're dead, and that's all there is to it.
Are you supposed to drink this thing, or...what? Oh shit, out of time! Here have a potion on meeeeeee
Whoah, baby. You're even hotter than this 14-year-old centaur chick in town who I'm totally not interested in. What say you and I go have a little adventure of our own later? :winky:
I used to wish I was not a brigand's child but actually an enchanted princess. Now I know that I really was enchanted, and I don't have to be a brigand any more!
Well if you want to be technical about it, you're not a princess, but whatever.
Thank you so much for freeing me.
Your dad's gonna give me the reward money for sure, but I wouldn't object to something a little more... personal...
I've got to hurry home to father and get his guards to capture the rest of the brigands before they manage to escape with the rest of the treasure. It must be returned to the rightful owners.
*sigh*... So close.
Yorick! Yorick! I'm me again!
Will your dad be glad that your spell's been repelled! We need to go before the brigand's know or they'll spoil our show. C'mon! We'd better make our getaway before they get in our way.
Yes! Let's all go together!
Yorick and I can return to the castle with the amulet I wear, but I'm afraid you'll have to get there on your own. There are two healing potions on my desk that you may take with you.
Well, I've done all the work so far. What's a little more, I guess?
You should use this secret passage and escape while they are arguing over the treasure. If they find you in here, you'll be overwhelmed and killed. Thank you again, and good luck! I'll make sure you are richly rewarded for your bravery.
I like the sound of that. "Richly" rewarded.
If you decide to counter the curser, then mind the mirror over mere minds. So tip the canoe and toodleoo! Elsa, if you do the honors, I'll honor your due.
Hm? What's that black bird over there?
Oh well. It's probably nothing.
*BANG BANG BANG BANG*
Hey! How did they get through that bullshit room so fast! Hmph, time to leave I guess.
Welllll... I've got time. Maybe I should take the bird with me, just in case.
Damn. Ah well. Out the secret passage I go!
Wait a minute. How does that even...?
Hey bitch, I'm back. This time I'm gonna fucking kill you.
Surprised to see me? Yeah I guess I'm just pretty damn stupid. You may as well cast a spell at me now.
Wow this takes me back. I loved the hell out of these games when I was a kid, and I thought all the jokes were hysterical, even when I didn't understand them. Now I just find them really annoying. Like, I want to start yelling "NEEEERRRDDSS!" at the programmers who wrote them.
This is appropriate here.
Yes! Look at me! I am awesome! Give me all your money!
Notice Toro is here. Syphyre will have a slightly different final screen than I do, and it'll be obvious why when he gets there.
Yorick cartwheels in, as useless as always.
You bet your damn bippy I did.
This is seriously my favorite pose. I could do this all day. In fact, I think I will.
Actually, I think we bid it "fondieu".
The best part of this series is that we get to save our character and import him into the next game. This game was Mass Effect before there was Mass Effect. I'll go into detail on what exactly transfers over into QFG2 when we get there. Sorry for the long update, but it's about damn time we finished the first game and moved onto the next. See you in QFG2VGA!
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How is that NOT true love?
Were there any options besides Katrina, Erana and Elsa?
You may want to skip the next update then...
Erana is the better person. But even beyond that, there's a very good reason to pick her.
I could even game the system and do whatever I want in 2 but become a Paladin in 3 by just picking it as my import class
I guess if that's the ending you want for your character...
Awake and happy from a fresh night's sleep in Erana's Garden, we head over to the healer's house to sell off our loots.
Why yes. Yes I am a hero. Thank you for noticing. Also thank you for the healing potions and the coins!
So here's the "fun" part. You take a claw, click it on her, and it sells. Then you do it again, and it sells. This is a screenshot after I already sold 10 of them. Yeah. That was boring.
Getting rather sick of these flying hell monsters. I'm gonna grab a few rocks and throw them at it's corpse. Yanno, stress relief.
That's probably enough rock throwing.
Man, did yet another goblin sneak out of its hideout? I feel some pretty stank hot breath behind me.
....uh oh
I recognize this...the mighty terrorsaurus rex! And I'm not even at full health and stamina. Time to do what a fighter hero's gotta do.
I'm taking him down, that's what I'm doing...
I gaze at the fallen foe, giving it the honor of one who fought fiercely, then died in battle.
The Ogre says "My loincloth is too tight!"
After another day and night of training, we return to the first foe we fought, the one who had us in the dirt after only a few seconds. The dreaded, fearsome, Weapon Master
He's either a dick, or a stickler for protocol
Yeah, figured that one out myself!
Asking about Elsa...yeah leaning more in the "he's a dick" direction.
Yep. Totally.
At any rate I'm not here to banter with you, I'm here to train. And lets begin...
At least he's a stickler for protocol during fighting.
I have to take a moment out here to admit I had to go look up how to defeat this bastard. What you are witnessing is actually my 5th attempt, and my stats are maxed out. I learned, after some searching, that your carried item weight actually has an effect on your combat ability. So I dropped my armor, potions, and a few other things weighing me down (not the sword and shield obviously) and was able to defeat him after that. I can only imagine this is a problem in the VGA version, but I really don't know.
Finally, the Weaponmaster cries "ENOUGH!"
Holy hell, this guy is a sore loser. Didn't he realize that he sparring against the soon to be hero of Spielburg and the surrounding lands?
Endgame time? I think it's endgame time.
I was actually looking for that site earlier to post it, but thought it was a different site. I downloaded the music a few years back (and I'm listening to it now).
May I also recommend
The Magic Meadow (Erana's Peace) Guitar Version
Yeah QFG helped introduce me to good video game music. I'd have to say what got me hooked on video game music, though, was a friend of the family who had a Roland M32 (or whatever) synth, and damn did the music from various games sound good on that.
*clap clap clap*
The designs for all of the monsters were much more intimidating in the EGA version. It's surprising that they would change them that drastically.
http://tartarus.rpgclassics.com/qfg1/monsters.shtml
The "Hero's March" is favorite piece of music from all of gaming history. I played these games so many god damn times as a kid so that helps explain it a little.
He does not know of the "way".
Oh I know. I'm prepared. I remember how punilicious he was the end finale for all these games was.
Well Telltale is making a King's Quest game so there is a chance that eventually they may also make a Quest for Glory and Space Quest. Personally I'd rather have them make a Space Quest.
I fully admit to having whistled it (the short version) a few times IRL, it's a spirited little tune. The series overall has some pretty great music. QFG4 is my favorite soundtrack from it; and it's available through the Quest Studios site.
For a while there, Infamous Adventures was working on a series called Quest for Infamy, which would have been a sort of spiritual sequel to these games except with the intent of becoming a world-ruling villain. Sadly, they stopped working on it and have instead finished a KQ3 remake and are nearly finished with their SQ2 remake.
I would have loved something like that.
D'awww
Don't worry, though, there's a video LP on the way right after this one!
converted to josh time
equals
"at least a year later"
right
Yeah, that's me. Just making the forest safe for... well, the only other person I've ever seen in it is Bruno, and some brigands. So I guess I'm making it safe for them.
I'm going to climb the fuck out of you, tree.
It gets boring clicking on the tree over and over. I set the start button of my Xbox 360 controller to Enter in Xpadder, and toggle it on, then walk away for a while. This is high-tech stuff. Back in the day you'd just set something heavy on your keyboard, or tape down the enter key.
Looking good. Looking good. Like I said, normally I'd obsessively max things out but that's easy enough (and more interesting) to do in QFG2, so let's beat this bitch.
But first, let's pick up a few of the things we missed along the way.
Well thanks. That's awful nice of you. I still have no idea how to play cribbage, though.
Yeah like I said this sucks. Erana's Peace doesn't cost a ration and recharges everything no matter how little sleep you actually get there.
And you don't have to play cribbage, either.
Right.
OH SHIT IT'S THE LAND OF THE LOST
Spell cast!
Waste?! Do you know how many steaks I can make out of this thing? I'm going to eat like a king!
It's... a bouncing jelly bowling pin? With red eyes? Well whatever. This thing is clearly a monster. A... really annoying, bouncy monster. And I'm a hero, so I've gotta kill it. It can't be any tougher than that Rex I just slaughtered.
Okay Antwerp. Just tell me where your face is so I can stab it.
Well, it's not here anymore. I guess that means I win. Yeah... yeah! Run away you coward! And don't come back or you'll get more of the same!
OH SHI-
We hold our dagger above our heads, desperately.
Huh. So that's how these things reproduce. So... did I just have sex or something?
All right enough of this nonsense. We find the keyhole in the rock, exactly where Bruno said it would be during his little covert meeting.
We use the toolkit, and not the key we took off the brigand. Practice makes perfect.
By the way, this is the toughest Pick Locks check in the game. You get as many tries as you want, though, as opposed to the safe, where it's three strikes and you're dead.
Yes! Brigands, here I come. Wait, what's that shadow hiding in the cave ahead? Oh yeah, I'm supposed to say the 'word'. What was that again? Klaatu... barada... noose... necktie... I think it was an "N" word. Oh wait! I remember!
Yes! Thank you, gingko biloba!
Nothing here now that we made the troll go away (it's just a standard troll battle like we've done before).
A minotaur! I remember reading about these guys back in the Famous Adventurer's Sneaking 101 course.
All right, so as long as I don't make any loud noises, I should be fine.
Side note here: Magic Users can either fight the minotaur with their spells/dagger or cast calm, which puts Toro to sleep, and then they can safely walk into the clearing, cast open on the gate and walk right into the brigand's fortress. Making any noise on this screen, though, guarantees that the next will be filled with brigands who shoot arrows at you while you try to get across, constantly draining your health.
Hyup! Up and over.
Hm, nothing suspicious here. I'll just walk over this lovely rug.
Huh huh... booby
Fine then! I'll just walk around it and over this sturdy-looking bridge!
NYAAAAAAAA
REWIND TIME FWWWOOOOSHWWWOOP
Oh come on. You guys must have been watching some old slapstick comedies or something. These traps are painfully obvious. Still, I'd better get a close look and make sure I don't make a doofus out of myself.
Using the Look icon on the stretched ropes will keep you from dying by touching them.
Made it through! Surely the brigand leader is behind this door.
Nope, just a mess hall. At least the only brigand is asleep, I should be able to pass eas-- aw shit. I hear footsteps. Time to buckle my swash!
Aha! I have used your security measures against you!
Yes, technology is a fickle mistress. The same things you would have used to keep me out are keeping you out! ...Okay, they're gone.
Letting the brigands see you do this next step alerts them to your scheme and they just take the other way around.
I knew it! So you're the stooges behind the stupid traps out there!
Topple it too early and they just walk around.
Yeah! We kicked the shit out of them. We even closed the door on the other side of the room as it was being opened by the stupid brigands who had to walk all the way around again!
Screw you guys. I know the leader is behind this door.
All right, sorry you guys. This is about halfway through the end sequence, but the other pictures are still uploading and there's a lot of transcribing to be done in this next section. I'll get the rest done tomorrow. For realsies. Promise.
Handmade Jewelry by me on EtsyGames for sale
Me on Twitch!
Actually come to think about it, the endgames in ALL of them are fantastic. But QFG1 just has the right mix of humor and puzzle solving and excellence.
I'm partial to QFG2's endgame sequence myself
EDIT: Getting the last bit of QFG1 done right now, and maybe I'll get started on QFG2 today.
I heartily approve!
Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
Wilds of Aladrion: [https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/comment/43159014/#Comment_43159014]Ellandryn[/url]
I approve.
All right, brigand leader, prepare yourself for-
God damn son of a bitch
Job hunting, or just sight-seeing? I foresee a brilliant future for you in the fall. If you've got something to say, then speak fast or forever hold your pieces. State your case before I case your estate!
Shut the fuck up, Yorick.
You know me? Then perhaps you have come to help. Perhaps you are able to take the child from the band. Alas, poor Yorick! I know me well.
Shut. The. Fuck--
Ten years ago, I swore I would find Elsa no matter what. It took me two years to find her, here with the brigands, and I've posed as her warlock ever since. I couldn't break the spell on her, nor could I leave her to grow up into an attractive woman surrounded by rogues and scoundrels.
Ha! Ten years and you couldn't even make a dispel potion. Some "warlock" you are. It took me less than two weeks to get all my shit together, and I didn't even start with any spells! You suck, Yorick.
Someone had to defend her honor!
Whatever helps you sleep at night. Anyway, I'm here to help Elsa since you clearly are incapable of doing anything except telling bad jokes.
It's about time that someone else helped Elsa before it's too late! Toro and I are the only friends she's got here. Toro is the minotaur that guards this fortress. Elsa found him when he was just a calf, and he's kowtowed to her ever since. He guarantees that the brigands won't give Elsa any bull.
Wait, so the minotaur is her friend too? Couldn't he have "defended her honor" while you actually did something substantial? I guess all those puns aren't going to write themselves. More reward money for me, I guess.
She's a lot like her dad, though. She organized these brigands and changed them from mere thugs into major raiders! She plans to move the entire band away from the valley as soon as the snow clears. If that happens, I know she will never be disenchanted.
Okay, I get it. So it's important that someone who has a Dispel potion gets to her in time. I just so happen to have a Dispel potion, so how's about letting me in on the secret of getting through this room?
I'll protect the Brigand Leader with everything I've got. That's no laughing matter as I get madder. This room is my way of keeping the brigands from bothering the Leader about raises, since it tends to raze the brigands. I designed it myself! This place has people rolling in the aisles.
But... don't you want me to help Elsa? That's what I'm here for, you know. I'm not going to hurt her. Just tell me which door to go through.
There are plenty of doors. You wouldn't want me to spoil your fun, now! Either you'll figure it out in the end, or you'll end it before you're out.
So basically the game designers made a puzzle in this room and they want me to figure it out no matter what. Thanks for nothing, you laughing jackass. Can't you tell me anything helpful?
I borrowed a Magic Mirror from a friend to try to break the spell, but it only works when spells are cast directly at you. If you're going to be the big Hero, I hope you brought a Dispel Potion or something. The true Dispel Potion will break an enchantment. You must splash the potion on Elsa as soon as you can, or she'll skewer you for sure. She's more than a match for old 'Swordy Lordy' now!
God dammit, do you even listen to me? Am I talking to myself? But thanks for letting me know about the mirror. And who is this 'Swordy Lordy' character?
You must know the 'Blade Braggart'. He used to show off in the castle courtyard all the time. Elsa once asked if 'Rapier Ruler' would teach her to use the sword, and the 'Sword Bore' told her he would not waste his talent on females. She came to me in tears. After all, she was only nine at the time. She can teach old 'Weapon Windbag' a thing or two now! Her arm is true, and she's truly disarming.
Okay, okay, enough about the Weapon Master. Tell me more about the mirror.
Ah yes, the 'Mirror with the Leer' as Erasmus calls it (or was it Fenrus?) It reflects a spell back on the caster of the spell. Now where did I put that mirror... was it on the desk in Elsa's office or else in the office on Elsa's desk?
God, you're worse than Erasmus. I'm leaving now.
That's funny, I feel a strong gravitational pull downward.
YAAAAAAARG
Okay, so if you take a wrong path, you instantly fall off the ledge. There's no pathfinding on this screen either, so you have to take very delicate steps or you'll end up rolling on the right hand side. Falling takes a little of your health off, and it's possible (although unlikely) you'll die if it happens enough times. Clicking the hand on yourself or the floor stops you from rolling.
Like so.
You son of a bitch. If I wasn't trying to be a hero I'd kill you. All right, let's try this door.
YOU PEEEEENIS WIIIIIIPE
*some time later*
The door on the right gives you this message, and then you end up...
Here.
Pulling the chain is the next correct action.
For some reason taking the correct steps pisses Yorick off, and he gets up and pulls a Phoenix Wright on you.
At a certain point he begins throwing things at you, like meeps or scrolls. This knocks the hero back a little bit, and could possibly knock him off the edge. So you need to work fast before this happens or you'll be back to square one. Alternatively, you can threaten him with a throwing dagger or flame spell and he'll teleport away, giving you free reign of the room.
If you've never played the game before, this room is kind of annoying.
Back through the door and you need to hurry through the one the chain opened. Trying to open it before you pull the chain just reveals a brick wall in your way.
Finally, we're over here next to this little tiny door.
Interacting with it starts it shaking a little bit, and you've got to get out of the way, similar to the 'ermit cave door.
Finally, the final door is finally revealed. Finally.
I honestly don't know why Yorick doesn't help you through this room. It seems sort of counter-intuitive to his goals. Whatever.
You know what? I bet this goes on forever. There is no Brigand Leader room behind this door or any other door for that matter.
Ha, ha! You must be the brigand leader, Elsa. I am here to rescue you!
What, you want to fight me? Silly girl, I can kill trolls! What makes you think you are any match for HURRRK
*SPLORRRRCH*
Taking too long to do anything, or taking any action besides throwing the Dispel Potion results in your instant death. Do not under any circumstances come to the brigand fortress without the Potion or you're dead, and that's all there is to it.
Are you supposed to drink this thing, or...what? Oh shit, out of time! Here have a potion on meeeeeee
Whoah, baby. You're even hotter than this 14-year-old centaur chick in town who I'm totally not interested in. What say you and I go have a little adventure of our own later? :winky:
I used to wish I was not a brigand's child but actually an enchanted princess. Now I know that I really was enchanted, and I don't have to be a brigand any more!
Well if you want to be technical about it, you're not a princess, but whatever.
Thank you so much for freeing me.
Your dad's gonna give me the reward money for sure, but I wouldn't object to something a little more... personal...
I've got to hurry home to father and get his guards to capture the rest of the brigands before they manage to escape with the rest of the treasure. It must be returned to the rightful owners.
*sigh*... So close.
Yorick! Yorick! I'm me again!
Will your dad be glad that your spell's been repelled! We need to go before the brigand's know or they'll spoil our show. C'mon! We'd better make our getaway before they get in our way.
Yes! Let's all go together!
Yorick and I can return to the castle with the amulet I wear, but I'm afraid you'll have to get there on your own. There are two healing potions on my desk that you may take with you.
Well, I've done all the work so far. What's a little more, I guess?
You should use this secret passage and escape while they are arguing over the treasure. If they find you in here, you'll be overwhelmed and killed. Thank you again, and good luck! I'll make sure you are richly rewarded for your bravery.
I like the sound of that. "Richly" rewarded.
If you decide to counter the curser, then mind the mirror over mere minds. So tip the canoe and toodleoo! Elsa, if you do the honors, I'll honor your due.
Hm? What's that black bird over there?
Oh well. It's probably nothing.
*BANG BANG BANG BANG*
Hey! How did they get through that bullshit room so fast! Hmph, time to leave I guess.
Welllll... I've got time. Maybe I should take the bird with me, just in case.
Damn. Ah well. Out the secret passage I go!
Wait a minute. How does that even...?
Hey bitch, I'm back. This time I'm gonna fucking kill you.
Surprised to see me? Yeah I guess I'm just pretty damn stupid. You may as well cast a spell at me now.
OH SHIT SON
herp a derp
Yeah, that's right, run away, BEYOOOOOTCH
This is appropriate here.
Yes! Look at me! I am awesome! Give me all your money!
Notice Toro is here. Syphyre will have a slightly different final screen than I do, and it'll be obvious why when he gets there.
Yorick cartwheels in, as useless as always.
You bet your damn bippy I did.
This is seriously my favorite pose. I could do this all day. In fact, I think I will.
Actually, I think we bid it "fondieu".
The best part of this series is that we get to save our character and import him into the next game. This game was Mass Effect before there was Mass Effect. I'll go into detail on what exactly transfers over into QFG2 when we get there. Sorry for the long update, but it's about damn time we finished the first game and moved onto the next. See you in QFG2VGA!