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OBL Really Just Died?

123457

Posts

  • South hostSouth host I obey without question Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    P10 wrote: »
    If he doesn't want to believe it, he doesn't have to. But there's enough evidence any reasonable person would accept the official story.

    Doesn't the official story strike you as completely insane?

    No. Not at all.

    South host on
    Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment.
  • Kipling217Kipling217 Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    South host wrote: »
    P10 wrote: »
    If he doesn't want to believe it, he doesn't have to. But there's enough evidence any reasonable person would accept the official story.

    Doesn't the official story strike you as completely insane?

    No. Not at all.

    Its not like we have seen even a hint of evidence to the contrary.

    Kipling217 on
    The sky was full of stars, every star an exploding ship. One of ours.
  • LearnedHandLearnedHand Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2011
    South host wrote: »
    P10 wrote: »

    Doesn't the official story strike you as completely insane?

    No. Not at all.

    Well, there you have it. If you think that it's perfectly reasonable that bin Laden was living in a mansion near the preeminent Pakistani military academy for several years and then a small group of elite military guys stormed this mansion, had no resistance, killed bin Laden (in spite of the fact that nobody was armed) and then after killing him, they threw his body in the ocean. No media confirmation. An immediate "burial at sea". And they did this because they wanted to respect Muslim tradition.

    If that sounds right to you, then okay. I understand entirely. I mean, I'm not being a dick about this. If that sounds plausible to you then fine.

    But to me, it sounds peculiar to say the least.

    LearnedHand on
  • OtarOtar Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Otar wrote: »
    Having read the entire thread I didn't see it discredited anywhere

    I meant in the mainstream news, this was discredited shortly after the statement was made. From what I've read, the clear consensus among Islam scholars is that burial at sea is only allowed if the person dies while at sea and there's no chance to get them back to land, et cetera.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/may/02/sea-burial-osama-bin-laden
    And if that is news to you clearly you aren't well versed enough in this topic to even form an opinion

    I don't know everything about the topic nor do you. This doesn't preclude one from contributing to civilised discussion on the matter.
    And it doesn't matter who in Al-Qaeda said it as long as it wasn't Bin Laden.

    Really? I don't think you actually mean this. So some 14 year old kid who says that he's in al-Qaeda and maybe his older brother is in a group called al-Qaeda (it's all just a loose confederation of people claiming to be al-Qaeda, of course...there's no top-down leadership or structure) says, "Oh yeah. I can confirm that Bin Laden is dead" that's good enough for you? Just absolutely anybody who's in al-Qaeda? Somebody who's never met bin Laden? They can say, "bin Laden is dead" and you'll buy that? That's ridiculous.
    thats for the standard test range of SNPs, you just extend the test region. Takes more time, higher accuracy.

    edit: with that, im out. Feel free to discard all I have said. Not interested in a protracted discusion this time at night.

    No, by all means get some sleep. Then maybe come back and explain DNA analysis in more detail and in layman's terms. Because I have no idea what all that "SNP" business means and it would be great to get an explanation from a bonafide DNA expert.

    If by discredited you mean 'is still a subject of ongoing debate with supporters from within the islamic community on both sides' then yes, yes it is discredited.

    Otar on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • OtarOtar Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    South host wrote: »
    P10 wrote: »

    Doesn't the official story strike you as completely insane?

    No. Not at all.

    Well, there you have it. If you think that it's perfectly reasonable that bin Laden was living in a mansion near the preeminent Pakistani military academy for several years and then a small group of elite military guys stormed this mansion, had no resistance, killed bin Laden (in spite of the fact that nobody was armed) and then after killing him, they threw his body in the ocean. No media confirmation. An immediate "burial at sea". And they did this because they wanted to respect Muslim tradition.

    If that sounds right to you, then okay. I understand entirely. I mean, I'm not being a dick about this. If that sounds plausible to you then fine.

    But to me, it sounds peculiar to say the least.

    How often do you think westpoint cadets go around kicking doors down and demanding to know who all the occupants of a house are? If you're answer is 'never', as it should be, his proximity to a military academy means exactly nothing except that he was intelligent and chose to hide in plain site. Also you still haven't addressed what they SHOULD have done with the body since Saudia Arabia refused it. You just keep saying 'that's stupid' without offering an alternative that wouldn't be ignoring islamic traditions.

    Otar on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • BurtletoyBurtletoy Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    South host wrote: »
    P10 wrote: »

    Doesn't the official story strike you as completely insane?

    No. Not at all.

    Well, there you have it. If you think that it's perfectly reasonable that bin Laden was living in a mansion near the preeminent Pakistani military academy for several years and then a small group of elite military guys stormed this mansion, had no resistance, killed bin Laden (in spite of the fact that nobody was armed) and then after killing him, they threw his body in the ocean. No media confirmation. An immediate "burial at sea". And they did this because they wanted to respect Muslim tradition.

    If that sounds right to you, then okay. I understand entirely. I mean, I'm not being a dick about this. If that sounds plausible to you then fine.

    But to me, it sounds peculiar to say the least.

    Again.

    What part of this seems 'off the mark' to you?

    Or

    'why would everyone, everyone on every conceivable side of this conflict, why would they all agree with a US lie rather than tell the truth.'

    Burtletoy on
  • OctoparrotOctoparrot Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    South host wrote: »
    P10 wrote: »

    Doesn't the official story strike you as completely insane?

    No. Not at all.

    Well, there you have it. If you think that it's perfectly reasonable that bin Laden was living in a mansion near the preeminent Pakistani military academy for several years and then a small group of elite military guys stormed this mansion, had no resistance, killed bin Laden (in spite of the fact that nobody was armed) and then after killing him, they threw his body in the ocean. No media confirmation. An immediate "burial at sea". And they did this because they wanted to respect Muslim tradition.

    If that sounds right to you, then okay. I understand entirely. I mean, I'm not being a dick about this. If that sounds plausible to you then fine.

    But to me, it sounds peculiar to say the least.

    It's almost as if you are completely incorrect about both the details and context of every action you just described.

    Octoparrot on
  • Styrofoam SammichStyrofoam Sammich WANT. normal (not weird)Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I saw Osama Bin Laden getting a slurpee at a gas station out on I-5 the other day.

    Styrofoam Sammich on
    wq09t4opzrlc.jpg
  • ArchArch Neat-o, mosquito! Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    I saw Osama Bin Laden getting a slurpee at a gas station out on I-5 the other day.

    Part of me really wants this to be a thing similar to Elvis sightings.

    The other part of me realizes it would incur some really heavy racism on the part of the people telling and reporting the story

    Arch on
  • Styrofoam SammichStyrofoam Sammich WANT. normal (not weird)Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Arch wrote: »
    I saw Osama Bin Laden getting a slurpee at a gas station out on I-5 the other day.

    Part of me really wants this to be a thing similar to Elvis sightings.

    The other part of me realizes it would incur some really heavy racism on the part of the people telling and reporting the story

    You'll notice I refrained from saying Osama Bin Laden sold me a slurpee at a gas station on i-5

    Styrofoam Sammich on
    wq09t4opzrlc.jpg
  • JihadJesusJihadJesus Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    They made a postive claim (Osama was killed) and backed it up with evidence (DNA testing). They also chose to withold some evidence (photos of the corpse).

    You can either attack and refute the evidence that they provided (...good luck with that) because they witheld additional evidence that makes you suspicious, or you can't. You don't get to say 'they didn't let me hold his severed head in my hands, so they're full of shit', i.e. what they DIDN'T provide means fucking nothing if you can't refute what they did.

    Which, clearly, you can't do in any way since you don't even seem to comprehend exactly what that is.

    JihadJesus on
  • LearnedHandLearnedHand Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2011
    What part of this seems 'off the mark' to you?

    I guess the whole thing.

    Otar wrote: »
    Also you still haven't addressed what they SHOULD have done with the body since Saudia Arabia refused it. You just keep saying 'that's stupid' without offering an alternative that wouldn't be ignoring islamic traditions.

    First of all, I don't believe for one second that the US military/government cares about Islamic traditions.

    As to what they should have done, they should have called the world-wide media in, allowed them to inspect the body, take pictures, ask questions, et cetera. You know, journalism and stuff.

    Then as to what you actually do with the body, that's a minor issue. You can cremate it. Or throw it in the ocean. I mean, I guess that in itself isn't an issue. But it's absurd to pass that off as keeping with Islamic tradition.

    LearnedHand on
  • Styrofoam SammichStyrofoam Sammich WANT. normal (not weird)Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    The military has actually made a big deal of respecting muslim society as much as possible.

    Because it makes our job there a lot easier.

    Unlike, you know, making a spectacle of the body.

    Styrofoam Sammich on
    wq09t4opzrlc.jpg
  • OctoparrotOctoparrot Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Arch wrote: »
    I saw Osama Bin Laden getting a slurpee at a gas station out on I-5 the other day.

    Part of me really wants this to be a thing similar to Elvis sightings.

    The other part of me realizes it would incur some really heavy racism on the part of the people telling and reporting the story

    You'll notice I refrained from saying Osama Bin Laden sold me a slurpee at a gas station on i-5

    He jumped into my taxi couple nights ago, he wanted to go to the adult bookstore on 3rd and Cherrybrook.

    Octoparrot on
  • DracomicronDracomicron Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Kipling217 wrote: »
    South host wrote: »
    P10 wrote: »
    If he doesn't want to believe it, he doesn't have to. But there's enough evidence any reasonable person would accept the official story.

    Doesn't the official story strike you as completely insane?

    No. Not at all.

    Its not like we have seen even a hint of evidence to the contrary.

    Actually, the story is not insane enough. If I were making this up, Osama would've been driving a mech and seconds away from launching a stolen soviet ICBM nuke at Moscow from his underground facility in order to start World War III when Seal Team 6, wearing power armor and led by God Emperor Obama, First Of His Name, would've bust through wave after wave of Al-Qaida and corrupt Pakistani forces to gun him down using dual-wielded railguns and chainsaw swords.

    Then Bin Laden's death would have released the thousand demons he was drawing power from (to combat kindey failure, you see), which would have then possessed the nuke and started the countdown again. God-Emperor Obama would then use his powerful psychic mindblast to tear open a hole in reality to safely get his soldiers out of there while the facility collapsed. Then he would turn around and stride back into the missile chamber to confront the now-reanimated zombie corpse of Osama Bin Laden. Osama would laugh and say, in a heavily accented evil voice, that the explosion would kill millions of Pakistanis, and that the entire Muslim world would know that it was due to the United State's actions. Then Obama would say, "No. Not today." He'd grab a plasma rifle that Ayman al-Zawahiri dropped and shoot the rock over the controls, causing a massive cave-in due to the superheated plasma and burying the missile deep underground.

    As Obama was out-running the explosion, Zombie Bin Laden would grab onto his leg and say, "You cannot escape!" and Obama would say, "Yes I can" then punt the terrorist's head into a chasm. Fade to white as the nuke goes off.

    The next day, High Inquisitor Hillary Clinton is digging through the rubble, searching for her onetime rival, now grudging friend. A rock moves! She goes and clears away the rock to find God Emperor Obama, unconscious but alive. He regains consciousness and says, "The threat has ended. I'm going to go home to my solid gold space station and make love to my wife while the Bard Kanye West sings next to the bed."

    Then they both give the camera a thumbs-up and FREEZE FRAME.

    THAT is what it would be if it were an insane story.

    Dracomicron on
  • OtarOtar Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    What part of this seems 'off the mark' to you?

    I guess the whole thing.

    Otar wrote: »
    Also you still haven't addressed what they SHOULD have done with the body since Saudia Arabia refused it. You just keep saying 'that's stupid' without offering an alternative that wouldn't be ignoring islamic traditions.

    First of all, I don't believe for one second that the US military/government cares about Islamic traditions.

    As to what they should have done, they should have called the world-wide media in, allowed them to inspect the body, take pictures, ask questions, et cetera. You know, journalism and stuff.

    Then as to what you actually do with the body, that's a minor issue. You can cremate it. Or throw it in the ocean. I mean, I guess that in itself isn't an issue. But it's absurd to pass that off as keeping with Islamic tradition.

    Except about half the people debating this issue in the islamic community agree what was done was roughly in line with their traditions, or are you an expert in islamic traditions? I'm not but with ~1/2 the experts agreeing for you to so easily hand wave their claim would take some level of expertise.

    And you really think it'd be a great idea to call a press conference with a corpse? Are you insane dude?

    Edit: I mean seriously, the idea that a press conference should be held to show off the 'american trophy' is disgusting like, are you thinking at all? Think for about 0.2 seconds what would happen at this press conference? It'd be a circus and a clear target for terrorist attacks and just think about the back lash for the image of the country, I mean jesus.

    Otar on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Styrofoam SammichStyrofoam Sammich WANT. normal (not weird)Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Octoparrot wrote: »
    Arch wrote: »
    I saw Osama Bin Laden getting a slurpee at a gas station out on I-5 the other day.

    Part of me really wants this to be a thing similar to Elvis sightings.

    The other part of me realizes it would incur some really heavy racism on the part of the people telling and reporting the story

    You'll notice I refrained from saying Osama Bin Laden sold me a slurpee at a gas station on i-5

    He jumped into my taxi couple nights ago, he wanted to go to the adult bookstore on 3rd and Cherrybrook.

    I saw Osama Bin Laden with a Chinese menu in his hand, walking through the streets of Soho in the rain. He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook's. Going to get himself a big dish of beef chow mein.

    Styrofoam Sammich on
    wq09t4opzrlc.jpg
  • Uncle_BalsamicUncle_Balsamic Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Even if they don't really care about Islamic tradition, they can only gain by claiming to be.

    Uncle_Balsamic on
    2LmjIWB.png
  • PotatoNinjaPotatoNinja Fake Gamer Goat Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    It is painfully clear that the photographs, DNA evidence, political announcements, random tweets, Pakistani political response, official Al Queda admissions, congratulations, discussions, and statements have all been part of an elaborate ploy to enact the most meaningless and least effective conspiracy of all time.

    Luckily, the amateur detectives (well, at this point there's really only one, maybe two of you, so maybe just "detective") hanging out on an internet forum dedicated to videogames and dicks are ready to blow this entire conspiracy wide fucking open. So far, we've established that it doesn't make sense that the military would dispose of the body quickly after taking photographic and genetic proof to ensure proper identification.

    I mean, why wouldn't the military cart around the body with them and show it off to the public and media? What possible consequences could that have? Who in the world would that possibly upset? If we could look at the body we wouldn't need to rely on stupid stuff like "DNA evidence" that's all confusing and full of science bullshit and could be wrong one out of a billion times, instead we could just be like "that's totally him."

    This is basically a Tom Clancy novel, if the main character spent all his time fucking around on a messageboard about videogames on the internet instead of that stupid spy bullshit.

    I for one am excited.

    PotatoNinja on
    Two goats enter, one car leaves
  • LearnedHandLearnedHand Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2011
    Otar wrote: »
    Except about half the people debating this issue in the islamic community agree what was done was roughly in line with their traditions, or are you an expert in islamic traditions? I'm not but with ~1/2 the experts agreeing for you to so easily hand wave their claim would take some level of expertise.

    And you really think it'd be a great idea to call a press conference with a corpse? Are you insane dude?

    Edit: I mean seriously, the idea that a press conference should be held to show off the 'american trophy' is disgusting like, are you thinking at all? Think for about 0.2 seconds what would happen at this press conference? It'd be a circus and a clear target for terrorist attacks and just think about the back lash for the image of the country, I mean jesus.

    I'm not going to entertain this "burial at sea is part of Islamic tradition" any further. If you think it is, fine.

    And yes, a press conference with the corpses. Like they did with Uday and Qusay Hussein. It doesn't have to be broadcast live with the corpse propped up in the foreground. But the media should be allowed in to take pictures and investigate this. Get an autopsy done too. Let's do this right. Don't just dump him in the fucking ocean.

    And what about when they captured Saddam? Here's the extremely "respectful" press conference for that complete with jeering military dudes:

    http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=3c4_1200806498

    LearnedHand on
  • JihadJesusJihadJesus Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Octoparrot wrote: »
    Arch wrote: »
    I saw Osama Bin Laden getting a slurpee at a gas station out on I-5 the other day.

    Part of me really wants this to be a thing similar to Elvis sightings.

    The other part of me realizes it would incur some really heavy racism on the part of the people telling and reporting the story

    You'll notice I refrained from saying Osama Bin Laden sold me a slurpee at a gas station on i-5

    He jumped into my taxi couple nights ago, he wanted to go to the adult bookstore on 3rd and Cherrybrook.

    I saw Osama Bin Laden with a Chinese menu in his hand, walking through the streets of Soho in the rain. He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook's. Going to get himself a big dish of beef chow mein.
    <3<3<3
    Reported for awesome.

    [Edit]
    And Draco, I'd totally play the shit out of that game.

    JihadJesus on
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    They had the compound where bin Laden was at under surveillance for over a year, using spotters on the ground and a full suite of technology at their disposal to determine how many people were inside, what their routines were, that a few of the people never ever went outside... it's not like they were just in the neighborhood and saw bin Laden tipping the pizza guy, they acted once they had absolutely confirmed he was there and they had enough information on the place and those in it to formulate a plan of action to maximize objectives with minimal risk to personnel. And keep in mind, even though the operation was incredible in its efficiency they still had problems, being forced to destroy one of their helicopters because it was damaged, which also meant leaving behind bin Laden's wives, who they had originally planned to take as well, instead of leaving for the Pakistani authorities.


    LearnedHand, for someone who is suspicious of the official story you don't seem to have looked into the official story, like, at all. BBC NewHour was talking about the details of the raid for weeks, with more and more information from high-ranking officials and accredited experts - from America, from Britain, from Pakistan, and probably from other places as well.

    I'm not going to entertain this "burial at sea is part of Islamic tradition" any further. If you think it is, fine.

    THAT IS NOT WHY THEY BURIED HIM AT SEA. THEY BURIED HIM AT SEA BECAUSE A) SAUDI ARABIA DIDN'T WANT THE BODY, B) THEY DIDN'T WANT A MARTYR'S SHRINE FOR HIM, C) THEY DIDN'T WANT PEOPLE COMING TO PISS ON THE GRAVE. THIS HAS BEEN MENTIONED IN THE THREAD MULTIPLES TIMES, STOP ACTING LIKE THE ONLY REASON THEY THREW HIM IN THE OCEAN WAS BECAUSE THEY ARE PRETENDING THAT'S HOW MUSLIMS HAVE FUNERALS.

    AND NO, THEY DON'T NEED TO DO A FUCKING AUTOPSY. THEY WATCHED HIM GET SHOT IN THE FUCKING HEAD ON THEIR LIVE SATELLITE FEED.

    I am losing what little patience I have trying to educate you about this, because it's obvious you're not listening to what is being said.

    DarkPrimus on
  • South hostSouth host I obey without question Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    And you don't think we learned something from those announcements? Maybe "hey, parading corpses and prisoners doesn't immediately cause an insurgency to stop! In fact, I think it pissed some people off!"

    South host on
    Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment.
  • OtarOtar Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Otar wrote: »
    Except about half the people debating this issue in the islamic community agree what was done was roughly in line with their traditions, or are you an expert in islamic traditions? I'm not but with ~1/2 the experts agreeing for you to so easily hand wave their claim would take some level of expertise.

    And you really think it'd be a great idea to call a press conference with a corpse? Are you insane dude?

    Edit: I mean seriously, the idea that a press conference should be held to show off the 'american trophy' is disgusting like, are you thinking at all? Think for about 0.2 seconds what would happen at this press conference? It'd be a circus and a clear target for terrorist attacks and just think about the back lash for the image of the country, I mean jesus.

    I'm not going to entertain this "burial at sea is part of Islamic tradition" any further. If you think it is, fine.

    And yes, a press conference with the corpses. Like they did with Uday and Qusay Hussein. It doesn't have to be broadcast live with the corpse propped up in the foreground. But the media should be allowed in to take pictures and investigate this. Get an autopsy done too. Let's do this right. Don't just dump him in the fucking ocean.

    And what about when they captured Saddam? Here's the extremely "respectful" press conference for that complete with jeering military dudes:

    http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=3c4_1200806498

    Yea go right ahead, but first admit that there is nothing in the Qu'ran against it some Islamic experts think that it is in line with the general faith. And admit you are not an expert. After that you can hand wave it away, I get it dude, that's all you've got left argument wise and since you won't admit you're wrong you have to cling to that. So admit it's a valid point of view and one adopted by people much more knowledgable than you and I won't bring it up again.

    And also, god forbid we should learn from our previous unethical actions. Why, if we did something disgusting and depraved before we should be doomed to repeat it forever! So you think ideally we should still be burning witches and hanging our enemies in plain view eh? What you posted proves exactly nothing. It was a disgusting unethical display then it would still be one now.

    Otar on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • DracomicronDracomicron Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Otar wrote: »
    Except about half the people debating this issue in the islamic community agree what was done was roughly in line with their traditions, or are you an expert in islamic traditions? I'm not but with ~1/2 the experts agreeing for you to so easily hand wave their claim would take some level of expertise.

    And you really think it'd be a great idea to call a press conference with a corpse? Are you insane dude?

    Edit: I mean seriously, the idea that a press conference should be held to show off the 'american trophy' is disgusting like, are you thinking at all? Think for about 0.2 seconds what would happen at this press conference? It'd be a circus and a clear target for terrorist attacks and just think about the back lash for the image of the country, I mean jesus.

    I'm not going to entertain this "burial at sea is part of Islamic tradition" any further. If you think it is, fine.

    And yes, a press conference with the corpses. Like they did with Uday and Qusay Hussein. It doesn't have to be broadcast live with the corpse propped up in the foreground. But the media should be allowed in to take pictures and investigate this. Get an autopsy done too. Let's do this right. Don't just dump him in the fucking ocean.

    And what about when they captured Saddam? Here's the extremely "respectful" press conference for that complete with jeering military dudes:

    http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=3c4_1200806498

    How are Uday and Qusay Hussein at all relevant to Osama Bin Laden? They're not religious figures, they don't even exist in anywhere near the same brain-space mental heirarchy that OBL was in.

    I'd also like to point out that all that Saddam Hussein stuff happened well before Obama was president, and attitudes may have changed since then.

    I'm declaring this thread to be about conspiracies that are more insane than Osama Bin Laden's death.

    Dracomicron on
  • LearnedHandLearnedHand Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2011
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    LearnedHand, for someone who is suspicious of the official story you don't seem to have looked into the official story, like, at all.

    Well, that's true. I think the story is completely ludicrous and I never believed it from day one. But I don't sit at home going over government documents and news stories and the like trying to uncover the truth. You know, like people who investigate the Kennedy assassination or whatever and watch the Zapruder film over and over.

    I mean, it strikes me as total bullshit but I don't really care.

    LearnedHand on
  • BurtletoyBurtletoy Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Plus we all know Obama and Bush are, like, identical twins.

    So they would obviously react the same way.

    Burtletoy on
  • South hostSouth host I obey without question Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    "This giant metal object can fly in the air at hundreds of miles an hour, while carrying hundreds of people across oceans safely and reliably" is something that can strike people as bullshit if they don't look into it. But then they get over their initial skepticism and look into it, and realize that planes are controlled using machines rather than magic.

    South host on
    Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment.
  • ArchArch Neat-o, mosquito! Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    South host wrote: »
    "This giant metal object can fly in the air at hundreds of miles an hour, while carrying hundreds of people across oceans safely and reliably" is something that can strike people as bullshit if they don't look into it. But then they get over their initial skepticism and look into it, and realize that planes are controlled using machines rather than magic.

    So what you are saying is, if I get this right, is that Osama was actually a machine.

    Which makes sense, actually!

    Where did they bury Megatron after the Autobots and a child destroyed him?

    That's right they dumped him in the fucking ocean

    Arch on
  • DracomicronDracomicron Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    JihadJesus wrote: »
    Octoparrot wrote: »
    Arch wrote: »
    I saw Osama Bin Laden getting a slurpee at a gas station out on I-5 the other day.

    Part of me really wants this to be a thing similar to Elvis sightings.

    The other part of me realizes it would incur some really heavy racism on the part of the people telling and reporting the story

    You'll notice I refrained from saying Osama Bin Laden sold me a slurpee at a gas station on i-5

    He jumped into my taxi couple nights ago, he wanted to go to the adult bookstore on 3rd and Cherrybrook.

    I saw Osama Bin Laden with a Chinese menu in his hand, walking through the streets of Soho in the rain. He was looking for a place called Lee Ho Fook's. Going to get himself a big dish of beef chow mein.
    <3<3<3
    Reported for awesome.

    [Edit]
    And Draco, I'd totally play the shit out of that game.

    I think it would play something like a cross between Planescape: Torment and the new Space Marine game.

    Dracomicron on
  • DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Well, Pakistan just arrested five CIA informants who helped the US in the bin Laden raid. But I guess the headline should read "Pakistan keeps up the smokescreen for the benefit of Obama's re-election, bin Laden alive but unavailable for comment".

    DarkPrimus on
  • JihadJesusJihadJesus Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    And if Islamic custom requires that people be buried within 24 hours of their deaths as has been reported, WTF do you think they did with anyone that died on board a ship at sea for the last 2,000 years? Stuffed 'em in a barrel and called it good enough?

    JihadJesus on
  • GaddezGaddez Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    DarkPrimus wrote: »
    LearnedHand, for someone who is suspicious of the official story you don't seem to have looked into the official story, like, at all.

    Well, that's true. I think the story is completely ludicrous and I never believed it from day one. But I don't sit at home going over government documents and news stories and the like trying to uncover the truth. You know, like people who investigate the Kennedy assassination or whatever and watch the Zapruder film over and over.

    I mean, it strikes me as total bullshit but I don't really care.

    So, what the hell are you doing in this thread? you obviously haven't given the topic any real thought, you don't have anything to back up your gut feeling, Theres no reason for the pakistani government, AQ, republicans, and the president to collectively lie about this, and now that you've been completely exposed as ignorant of the many factors involved with the matter you are pleading that you really don't care.

    Like I asked a page ago: what would it take to convince you that these events did in fact happen as described?

    Gaddez on
  • LearnedHandLearnedHand Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2011
    Gaddez wrote: »
    Like I asked a page ago: what would it take to convince you that these events did in fact happen as described?

    I think I've covered this one. Inviting the global media to view the body, ask questions of government officials and military commanders and just having done things right. An autopsy. Proper investigation. If I was there, the conversation would have gone like this:

    LearnedHand: Boy, that was surprising. So who killed bin Laden then?

    Dude: Yeah, that was me.

    LearnedHand: He wasn't even armed. What the hell, man?

    Dude: I know, I know. I panicked.

    LearnedHand: Well, these things happen, I guess. We should probably call the world-wide media and --

    Commander: Alright, boys. Let's get this guy to the ocean.

    LearnedHand: Wait...what for?

    Commander: We're going to throw him in.

    LearnedHand: Well, fine but. I mean...this is kind of a big story. The media probably would want to know about this. And you know, for some kind of proof that this happened.

    Commander: No time. Islamic law dictates that burials must be done in 24 hours.

    LearnedHand: Well, fine but if we put the call out, the world-wide media can be here in half an hour.

    Commander: No, no. We have to put him in the ocean now.

    LearnedHand: Why the ocean anyway?

    Commander: It's what Muslims do.

    LearnedHand: Are you quite sure about that?

    Commander: I read it on a menu once.

    LearnedHand: What? This is Osama bin Laden. We have to let everybody know about this and have a proper investigation. You can't just throw him in the ocean. It's absurd. Islamic traditions be damned, this is a story that needs to be told and it has to be done right.

    Commander: So give me a hand with this body then.

    LearnedHand: Fine. But don't blame me when people don't believe that any of this happened.

    LearnedHand on
  • PotatoNinjaPotatoNinja Fake Gamer Goat Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Gaddez wrote: »
    Like I asked a page ago: what would it take to convince you that these events did in fact happen as described?

    Long form death certificate.

    PotatoNinja on
    Two goats enter, one car leaves
  • JihadJesusJihadJesus Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    You skipped over the part where they used fucking DNA evidence to document his death. You know, that thing you have no comprehension of and can't refute in any way.

    JihadJesus on
  • South hostSouth host I obey without question Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    You...you really aren't getting the whole "burial at sea" thing, are you?

    Burial within 24 hours is Islamic tradition. We offered to transfer the body to Saudi Arabia. They did not want it. We're not going to bury him on American soil. We're not going to bury him on land where he has sympathizers.

    As no other country could meet the criteria of
    1. accepting the body
    2. being an area where the burial site would not become a shrine
    3. being an area where the burial site would not be desecrated

    the U.S. government instead opted to dispose of the body off of a ship, which although not entirely in keeping with normal Islamic burial practices, is much better than not burying him immediately, or letting the body be desecrated.

    South host on
    Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment.
  • SmasherSmasher Starting to get dizzy Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    What exactly would an autopsy prove anyway? I can't imagine him being recognizable beyond a reasonable doubt given that he was shot in the head.

    And if they were making this up, why would they not just stick with the story of him being armed?

    Smasher on
  • GaddezGaddez Registered User regular
    edited June 2011
    Let me rephrase this Learnedhand because I was Perhaps unclear on the matter:

    What would it take at this point for you to belive that the official story is in fact true, keeping in mind that since we no longer have his body we can't in fact ship it to you for personal inspection.

    Gaddez on
  • LearnedHandLearnedHand Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited June 2011
    Gaddez wrote: »
    Let me rephrase this Learnedhand because I was Perhaps unclear on the matter:

    What would it take at this point for you to belive that the official story is in fact true, keeping in mind that since we no longer have his body we can't in fact ship it to you for personal inspection.

    Releasing the photos and the videos would probably go some ways.

    LearnedHand on
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