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Meeting people from the internet.

nightmarennynightmarenny Registered User regular
edited July 2011 in Help / Advice Forum
Some I'm a musician trying to put a band together. I just got a response from someone on criegslist in my area. He just invited me to jam with him and his brother. As a get together thing. I'm not sure what I should do to be safe.

nightmarenny on
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My Band "The Wicked Girls" http://soundcloud.com/the-wicked-girls/sets
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Posts

  • cooljammer00cooljammer00 Schattenjägers Gon' SchattenjägeRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Bring a friend? Ask to meet at a neutral, well lit, populated area first? Leave your location with someone who can report you missing?

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    I pronounce it bee-log. Most recent entry: VIDEO GAMES: GUNPOINT, OR A SCIENTIFIC STUDY ON WHAT HAPPENS WHEN GLASS MEETS TROUSERS.
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  • SmokeStacksSmokeStacks License Number 137596Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    All of the above, especially if you are taking a valuable instrument along with you.

    STEAM ME BABY
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  • Chases Street DemonsChases Street Demons Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    First meeting has to be at a neutral, public place. If you're old enough I would say to go grab a bite to eat first and see if they kick off the creepy vibe. Then set up a second time to get together and play.

    It's messed up, but with CL part of the problem is that people know you're coming, and they know what you're bringing with you.

    "Sometimes things aren't complicated," I said. "You just have to be willing to accept the absolute corruption of everybody involved."

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  • rockmonkeyrockmonkey Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Take a friend with you. Tell them the two of you are doing something after the jam session, or that he called and needed to be picked up from someplace as you were leaving to meet them. It doesn't have to be too detailed because the details really aren't their business, so keep it simple. Also tell a third person (friend, family member, SO) where the two of you will be, the time, and anything you happen to know about the two guys you're meeting. Also if you think you'll be done around, say, 10pm, tell this 3rd person to give you a call around 9:45pm on your cell. This also helps to give you an out to leave if they turn out to be normal guys, but, want you to hang around and you don't care to. You can claim based on the call that you need to go. (same prinicpal many people use with first blind dates). You could even schedule the fake call like 30 minutes into the meet as a way out if you feel uncomfortable.

    Be aware of your surroundings.

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  • EggyToastEggyToast Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Are you meeting this guy in rural Indiana or in West Baltimore?

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  • Sir CarcassSir Carcass I have been shown the end of my world Austin, TXRegistered User regular
    edited July 2011
    rockmonkey wrote: »
    Take a friend with you. Tell them the two of you are doing something after the jam session, or that he called and needed to be picked up from someplace as you were leaving to meet them.

    I wouldn't even give a fake reason, just say "This is my friend Jeremiah." Jam sessions are usually pretty social events so bringing a friend wouldn't be too weird.

    I would check and see if there's any practice space rental places in your area and meet there. When I joined a local band here, they were already practicing there and that's where we met. It was something like $12 an hour for an air conditioned room with a mixer, mics, and speakers.

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  • BlindZenDriverBlindZenDriver Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Seriously!

    The odds of this being anything but nice and friendly is so small it's more appropriate to think about traffic accidents while going over there. Unless the meeting place is somewhere VERY shady then just go.

    Bones heal, glory is forever.
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  • oldsakoldsak Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    I've done multiple jam sessions with people from CL. It's always been fine. Of course, they've always been at rented studio space. I suppose I might be concerned if someone wanted to meet at his apartment in some sketch neighborhood.

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  • Chases Street DemonsChases Street Demons Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    BlindZenDriver wrote: »
    Seriously!

    The odds of this being anything but nice and friendly is so small it's more appropriate to think about traffic accidents while going over there. Unless the meeting place is somewhere VERY shady then just go.

    You still wear your seatbelt though. Taking precautions here is a wise idea.

    "Sometimes things aren't complicated," I said. "You just have to be willing to accept the absolute corruption of everybody involved."

    · Agree Awesome
  • BlindZenDriverBlindZenDriver Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    Chases Street Demons wrote: »
    You still wear your seatbelt though. Taking precautions here is a wise idea.

    Of course I wear a seatbelt, but I don't check my car for explosives before I get in.

    In some place on this planet the explosives check would be more advisable than the seatbelt but fortunately not here so I don't bother or worry which makes life easier - same things applies with meeting strangers.

    Bones heal, glory is forever.
    · Agree Awesome
  • DemerdarDemerdar Registered User regular
    edited July 2011
    I would just meet up in a public place to grab a coffee or something (with your instrument in the car, of course) just to make sure they are on the level. If they balk or no-show then obviously something was up. Other than that I wouldn't worry about it (have you spoken to them on the phone? If you have, and they seem pretty chill then just go).

    parabol
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