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Occupy Hell: How come 1% of the forumers get 99% of the gifts?! [Secret Satans]

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Posts

  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    So I get home from the movies tonight and what do I see on my porch? A giant box from the post office!



    ...addressed to my dad. It was sheets.

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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    godmode wrote:
    Kusuguttai wrote:
    godmode wrote:
    Hmmmm a Think Geek package has arrived at my apartment. Of course, it's the one day I'm not there :P I don't remember ordering anything recently, so perhaps this is a gift! Update shortly.

    Assumption correct! My Satan has purchased me the illustrious BAG OF HOLDING!
    photo.jpg

    My roommate (who opened it and snapped the photo in my absence) said there was no message, so my Satan is still a mystery! But thank you, mysterious gifter!

    i have this bag and it is incredible

    Same bag, same Zero hoodie, soon Kusu we shall be indistinguishable from each other.

    I am being completely serious when I say how the fuck did you know what I was wearing today

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  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    FUCK

    sigh

    If it's not here this week, USPS will be hearing from me.

    Gonna pull some United Nations "sternly worded letter" ass-whuppings on them

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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    Seriously I am wearing my zero hoodie how did you know that

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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Registered User
    SLyM wrote: »
    Chocolate covered pretzels taste way better than simply the sum of their parts.

    Which is astounding because both chocolate and pretzels are amazing already

    This is a good post.

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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    FUCK

    sigh

    If it's not here this week, USPS will be hearing from me.

    Gonna pull some United Nations "sternly worded letter" ass-whuppings on them

    Haha no worries mate it was humorous.

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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    If the tracking still hasn't updated there might be somethin goin down. I had problems with the usps last year or the year before and the package got there several weeks late considering I was sending it six hours away by car.

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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Registered User
    edited December 2011
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    If the tracking still hasn't updated there might be somethin goin down. I had problems with the usps last year or the year before and the package got there several weeks late considering I was sending it six hours away by car.

    We basically won't replace anything for our customers until it's 30 days late around this time of year (unless it shows that it was delivered, in that case, it was stolen or misdelivered and we will replace it). They almost always get it in that time.

    ThreeCubed on
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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Registered User
    edited December 2011
    I like that more miniature chains are linking!!
    Spoiler:

    ThreeCubed on
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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Registered User
    A duck! wrote: »
    So my gifts showed up from my Satan! I wish my phone would connect to my PC so I could upload them!

    I got a nice tin of Maple Ice Mints, which I am very quickly munching my way through, two L.E. Modesitt books, Snow Crash and seasons 1 of Venture Bros. and Metalocalypse! Thank you, Mint!

    @Mint is pretty wonderful.

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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    Margarazzi wrote:
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    If the tracking still hasn't updated there might be somethin goin down. I had problems with the usps last year or the year before and the package got there several weeks late considering I was sending it six hours away by car.

    We basically won't replace anything for our customers until it's 30 days late around this time of year (unless it shows that it was delivered, in that case, it was stolen or misdelivered and we will replace it). They almost always get it in that time.

    that is a ridiculously long time to wait for a package if you paid for a certain level of urgency. The incident I had was when I decided to never use the usps again when there's a UPS store next door; never had a problem shipping with them and they always deliver on or very damn close to the estimated date.

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  • KeithKeith Registered User regular
    I have no idea who Mint is

    7LmZWpZ.jpg
    Amazon Wishlist | Steam | 3DS: 3497-0691-2891
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  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    edited December 2011
    OK, Kusu, I just checked the tracking again and it finally got updated

    As of today at 5:09 AM, it was in Richmond, CA

    So expect it hopefully tomorrow, unless the weather there is extremely shit :]

    Sweeney Tom on
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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    OK, Kusu, I just checked the tracking again and it finally got updated

    As of today at 5:09 AM, it was in Richmond, CA

    So expect it hopefully tomorrow, unless the weather there is extremely shit :]
    Thats awesome! And also the same place I have to go to court.

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  • Sara LynnSara Lynn Registered User regular
    My Satanee's stuff is FINALLY headed to my house. Yess.

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  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    Kusuguttai wrote:
    OK, Kusu, I just checked the tracking again and it finally got updated

    As of today at 5:09 AM, it was in Richmond, CA

    So expect it hopefully tomorrow, unless the weather there is extremely shit :]
    Thats awesome! And also the same place I have to go to court.

    Can I be a character witness

    I promise not to provide peanut butter kusu as evidence

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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Registered User
    edited December 2011
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Margarazzi wrote:
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    If the tracking still hasn't updated there might be somethin goin down. I had problems with the usps last year or the year before and the package got there several weeks late considering I was sending it six hours away by car.

    We basically won't replace anything for our customers until it's 30 days late around this time of year (unless it shows that it was delivered, in that case, it was stolen or misdelivered and we will replace it). They almost always get it in that time.

    that is a ridiculously long time to wait for a package if you paid for a certain level of urgency. The incident I had was when I decided to never use the usps again when there's a UPS store next door; never had a problem shipping with them and they always deliver on or very damn close to the estimated date.

    Yes, the USPS is total and udder crap.

    The business mail supervisor made me cry the other day when I brought 150 pieces of mail at 5:06 (they stop accepting mail at 5:00). Yes, I'm ashamed that I teared up, but I was running on 2 hours of sleep and was already frazzled and frustrated that no one would take the damn mail, he was mean, and NO ONE AT THAT GODDAMN FACILITY WOULD TAKE MY FUCKING MAIL THAT ALREADY HAD POSTAGE PAID AND AFFIXED. It wasn't even bulk mail (that they have to process a certain way).

    I understand that they are stressed this time of year, but when no one will come pick up the mail because it's too much for a carrier but not enough for a bobtail, and my warehouse doesn't close until 5pm, and the clerks inside the post office won't accept my mail because it's too many pieces, you leave me no choice but to show up at your dock at 5:06.

    Fuckers.

    ThreeCubed on
    EyQGd.jpg
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  • MarthMarth Contemplative Kermit Registered User regular
    Margarazzi wrote:
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    Margarazzi wrote:
    Kusuguttai wrote: »
    If the tracking still hasn't updated there might be somethin goin down. I had problems with the usps last year or the year before and the package got there several weeks late considering I was sending it six hours away by car.

    We basically won't replace anything for our customers until it's 30 days late around this time of year (unless it shows that it was delivered, in that case, it was stolen or misdelivered and we will replace it). They almost always get it in that time.

    that is a ridiculously long time to wait for a package if you paid for a certain level of urgency. The incident I had was when I decided to never use the usps again when there's a UPS store next door; never had a problem shipping with them and they always deliver on or very damn close to the estimated date.

    Yes, the USPS is total and udder crap.

    The business mail supervisor made me cry the other day when I brought 150 pieces of mail at 5:06 (they stop accepting mail at 5:00). Yes, I'm ashamed that I teared up, but I was running on 2 hours of sleep and was already frazzled and frustrated that no one would take the damn mail, he was mean, and NO ONE AT THAT GODDAMN FACILITY WOULD TAKE MY FUCKING MAIL THAT ALREADY HAD POSTAGE PAID AND AFFIXED. It wasn't even bulk mail (that they have to process a certain way).

    I understand that they are stressed this time of year, but when no one will come pick up the mail because it's too much for a carrier but not enough for a bobtail, and my warehouse doesn't close until 5pm, and the clerks inside the post office won't accept my mail because it's too many pieces, you leave me no choice but to show up at your dock at 5:06.

    Fuckers.

    My dad used to be a teller at USPS. He may have made an exception. *clears throat*
    Spoiler:

    Steam Xbox Live LoL: SadSchaub
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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    Then doesn't that make it a useless post

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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Registered User
    Yeah, I'm aware I was generalizing, because I have encountered some very nice and helpful USPS employees.

    But some of them are so awful it hurts inside.

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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    It just baffles me how entirely incompetent the usps is compared to FedEx and UPS

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  • Sweeney TomSweeney Tom Registered User regular
    Yeah, I think this might be the last time I knowingly use USPS.

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  • KetBraKetBra hiRegistered User regular
    Tef wrote:
    Yay! @ketbra I'm glad you like your presents! :D I'm putting together something a bit more personalised that I'll send myself. Since it'll be coming from Australia, I wanted I make sure you had some gifts prior to Christmas

    Thanks a ton dude! All this stuff is super awesome

    Was just playing some assassin's creed. Running around tripping people with the hookblade is now my favorite thing to do.

    sig.png
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  • KusuguttaiKusuguttai __BANNED USERS
    Yeah, I think this might be the last time I knowingly use USPS.

    I live in the san Francisco bay area. Trentsteel lives somewhere in southern California. It takes 7 hours to drive from my house to, say, Disneyland.

    I paid for 2-3 day shipping. It got there after like two or three weeks. That is an obscene amount of time for how close the shipment was.

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  • nevilleneville The Worst Gay (Seriously. The Worst!)Registered User regular
    Makershot wrote:
    neville wrote:
    @naporeon and @makershot told me about their team name on Bastille Day. It was Bastille Magnolias.
    yeah, they always have awesome team names
    My personal favorite was "I hear that going down on Oprah is like eating cottage cheese out of Rueben Studdard's armpit"

    Would that I could vomit through the internet...

    nevillexmassig1.png
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  • CrackedLensCrackedLens Registered User regular
    i just ordered all of my satanee's stuff

    its coming here to the house so i can rub my junk all over it and then wrap it and send it to you

    you lucky devil you

    XBoxLive Gamertag: ZombieKyle Secret Satan Wishlist
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  • Blake TBlake T Registered User regular
    Syphilis.

    The gift that keeps giving.

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  • WeaverWeaver Storm coming FinallyRegistered User regular
    Fedex and UPS don't process the millions of small, letter sized pieces that are distributed every day. Or bulk mailings that, while are annoying to get, enough people do appreciate to make them profitable. The USPS is badass, but if you're sendinf a larger parcel feel free to use one of the multiple private sector options.

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    Steam: weavermatic
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  • #pipe#pipe Cocky Stride, Musky odours Pope of Chili TownRegistered User regular
    Blake T wrote:
    Herpes.

    The gift that gives for the rest of your life.

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  • MetroidZoidMetroidZoid Registered User regular
    Blake T wrote:
    Syphilis.

    The gift that keeps giving.

    Also Dissapointment. Or does it. Not. Maybe. Who knows?

    9UsHUfk.jpgSteam
    3DS FC: 4699-5714-8940 Playing Pokemon, add me! Ho, SATAN!
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  • KadithKadith Registered User regular
    So I got a text earlier saying I got a package at home. Expecting the best I tell my dear sweet to mother to rip that bitch open.

    This is what she found.
    Spoiler:

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  • ThreeCubedThreeCubed Registered User
    I'm okay with the speed-for-the-price of USPS.

    I'm less okay with their customer service. Very not okay with it in fact.

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  • Lost SalientLost Salient Z is for Zillah who drank too much ginRegistered User regular
    Blake T wrote:
    Syphilis.

    The gift that keeps giving.
    #pipe wrote:
    Blake T wrote:
    Herpes.

    The gift that gives for the rest of your life.

    Trivia category yesterday was riddles. "What can you catch but not throw?" The exact right answer was "a cold" but also accepted was "the clap, herpes, or any other STD as long as you don't show me to prove it."

    QuW2glN.jpg"Sandra's favourite movie is escape from new York because she cries when magpie and brain die because they will never be together." DON'T FREAK OUT HAIL SATAN
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  • naporeonnaporeon Registered User regular
    neville wrote:
    Makershot wrote:
    neville wrote:
    @naporeon and @makershot told me about their team name on Bastille Day. It was Bastille Magnolias.
    yeah, they always have awesome team names
    My personal favorite was "I hear that going down on Oprah is like eating cottage cheese out of Rueben Studdard's armpit"

    Would that I could vomit through the internet...

    Luke and I have very different opinions on what constitutes a good trivia team name.

    Bastille Magnolias was all him, though. Still delightful.

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  • WeaverWeaver Storm coming FinallyRegistered User regular
    Blake T wrote:
    Syphilis.

    The gift that keeps giving.
    #pipe wrote:
    Blake T wrote:
    Herpes.

    The gift that gives for the rest of your life.

    Trivia category yesterday was riddles. "What can you catch but not throw?" The exact right answer was "a cold" but also accepted was "the clap, herpes, or any other STD as long as you don't show me to prove it."

    Your drift.

    7BLr6AJ.jpg
    Steam: weavermatic
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  • Blake TBlake T Registered User regular
    I am sure I can throw a midget with herpes.

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  • Blake TBlake T Registered User regular
    I like weaver's answer though.

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  • WeaverWeaver Storm coming FinallyRegistered User regular
    Blake T wrote:
    I like weaver's answer though.

    :bz

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    Steam: weavermatic
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  • sarukunsarukun Gornlord Interplanetary InsanitariumRegistered User regular
    AhmahGahahmahGahahmahGah packaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaage!

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This discussion has been closed.