Man, that last dream felt like it lasted a week. What was I even doing again?
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome
--- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by Katrina
--- Guarded by Toby the ape
-- Nikolai - SAVED by letting him die and join Anna
-- Gypsy - SAVED by rescuing Igor
-- Crazium - SAVED because I know formulas like a boss
-- Burgo - Just wants peace, not a bad guy, grandson of Piotyr
- Leshy Riddles
-- What do the fairies want?
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Inv High Priestess - Baba Yaga
--- Will help me if I give her "food"
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
--- Serves Queen of Swords (Dark Master is a woman!)
--- Definitely going to be a pain in my ass again
--- Desires revenge, but can't now
-- Queen of Cups - Katrina
--- Kind and loving and trying to help me
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me
--- Goals are an illusion?
-- Queen of Swords - ?
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Dark Master(!)
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 1. Bone - HAVE - Tombstone in swamp
-- 2. Sense - HAVE - Squid Stone
-- 3. ? - Stolen from Hangman Tree, possibly by Baba Yaga
-- 4. Blood - HAVE - Monastery
-- 5. Mouth - Taken by castle people. Katrina used it to get me out?
-- 6. Heart - Given to Gregor, missing and likely dead
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle
-- Tanya
--- Vampire, daughter of Innkeepers
-- Stranger
--- Referred to as Dark Master (!)
--- Not well liked by most in castle
- MISC
-- Get Erana's staff in front of town
--- Cast Destiny Spell
--- Requires one dead thing and one living thing to sacrifice itself
-- How did I get here?
-- Who brought me here?
-- How in blazes can I get out of here?
Well, holy shit. Let's pare that down to manageable tasks for now...
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome
--- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Inv High Priestess - Baba Yaga
--- Will help me if I give her "food"
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 3. ? - Stolen from Hangman Tree, possibly by Baba Yaga
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle
- MISC
-- How did I get here?
-- Who brought me here?
There. I guess. Well, I did get another round of shit for Baba Yaga, so let's start there, since I'm nearby.
Hey, have you and Baba got something going on the side that I don't know about?
I'd vomit, but given what I know about Baba Yaga, that might just turn her on, so I'll just leave it at "No". Time to grind me some more bonemeal, though...
And here we go, one more time...
OK, OK, I know the drill, feet stuck to the floor, yadda yadda...
Here, I brought you more useless shit food. Let's start with the bonemeal.
What do you want in return for your little gift?
Well, let's start from the beginning. I got dropped here mysteriously in the Dark One's cave, and ever since then, I've been...
Wait, what? The folks at the castle? The Dark Master brought me here on purpose? Why didn't I just get summoned directly to the Master, then?
They just didn't realize how powerful the Dark Influences are. They are keeping a close watch over you now, though. The castle folks used a lot of magic to get you here. You should be sure and thank them for your visit when you see them.
Oh, I'll hope to see them really soon.
To-Do:
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter? --- Meet out front of castle
- MISC -- How did I get here?
-- Who brought me here? -- The folks at the castle brought me here, but why?
Anyway, as I was saying, ever since I got here, I've been collecting Dark One Rituals. I heard one was nearby here. Have you seen it?
So you heard about that, eh? I found it hidden in the Hangman Tree some years ago. You're asking for trouble. I hope you know using that Ritual for any purpose will only bring you grief.
It can be used in either of two ways. Its main purpose is to bring a Dark One across to this world. However, a very powerful wizard could use it to send the Dark One back to its world.
Well, then, it's a good thing I'm a...
You don't qualify as a very powerful wizard, as I see it. Still, you want it, you got it.
You put the Breath Ritual away in your pack.
Hey, you haven't seen anything....bah, thanks, I guess.
To-Do:
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 3. Breath - HAVE - Baba Yaga
I still have this goo, too. Maybe I can trade this for something that would make me a more powerful wizard?
Magic? Let me think, what have I got that won't let you get me? I suppose you want something other than a spell to cause warts? Oh, all right. Here's a spell scroll to teach you the 'Hide' spell. I use it all the time, as you can tell.
+6 Learn Invisibility Spell from Baba Yaga (247)
Invisibility could come in handy...
Hero near, Out of Here!
Well, fuck going back there, then. Unless I burn the place down at some point, that is.
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome
--- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
I suppose I should give that gnome his Good Humor back. That should make me popular.
Hey Burgo. I'm about to make the entire town happy again...just trust me.
Ooh, breakfast!
So guys, it turns out that in order for me to get that staff in front of town, I need someone to sacrifice themselves to bring a loved one back. So, for example, if I tracked down your daughter, and she happened to be, say, dead, well, how about it, guys?
... ...
Right, I know my way out. First, though...
OK, Gnome, fuck with me and I end you. Everyone will probably be just as happy.
That's a good gnome. Wait, don't say anything! That will only make it harder to do the right thing...
Eat. Don't speak.
+15 Restore Punny's Humor (262)
Not bad. Pretty good, actually. Hey, I feel funny. I mean REALLY funny. What was that thing?
Toxic, probably. I got it from Baba Yaga, who claims it'll fix your humor.
You know what they say about humor, if you don't got it, ya won't get it. And if ya don't get it, I'm sure someone will try to explain it at great length.
Do you know why Gnome jokes are so short? So that they won't go over the Dwarves' heads. There's no point in telling a Dwarf a joke with a double meaning. He won't get either one. Judging from the expression, 'What you don't know can't hurt you,' Dwarves are practically invulnerable.
Of course, far be it from me to say that all Dwarves are just plain dumb. Most are pretty greedy, too. Dwarves get their money the hoard way. They won't even spend the time a day. Dwarves don't care how people treat them, as long as they do.
Of course, you know what you got when the singing dragon fell into the Dwarf mine? 'A flat miner.' And on that note, let's change the subject.
And to think I actually thought it would work. Shame on me I guess.
Well, now that I'm back in the funny business, it's one more show and I'm back on the road. I'm going to show these yokels that he who laughs last just didn't get it.
Well, my work here is done...I guess. I'll just be going...
Some people spread happinesss wherever they go; others, whenever they go. Fortunately, you are the former. If ya was the ladder, you'd probably have a few rungs missing.
Before ya blow, Joe, I figure Iowa. I'm going ta let ya in on a secret only we Gnomes know. I'm going ta tell ya the Ultimate Joke. Don't wince, Vince. This is straight, mate. Ya tell this one, and whoever hears it is going ta laugh. Really laugh. Can't help it, can't stop it kind of laugh.
Only works once, and should only be used in last resorts, Mort. It's the last laugh, so ta speak. The best jest of the west. Yours fer the telling.
The Gnome tells you a rather silly joke. You find yourself laughing despite yourself.
See what I mean, Gene? Tell this joke to a big bad dude that's out ta do ya in, then exit while he's laughin'. Use it or lose it. Bye, bye, Birdie.
Sure, I'll remember that right when my mastery of magical forces proves insufficient. So, likely never? Thanks, though.
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome --- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
--- SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke to distract someone once.
Now to go deal with that dried-up Domovoi in the Monastery.
Quick use of the Hexapod sign, and...
...here we are. So...dried up husk of a Domovoi? What's over on the cabinet there?
This amazingly lifelike sculpture looks like a cross between a baby Troll and a hermit or dervish. It fits the description of a "Domovoi" except that it's totally dried out (and unmoving).
That was rather oddly specific. Rehydration potion, do your thing!
+6 Rehydrate Dried Domovoi (268)
Glad am I to be alive. Happy thanks, I give you. Careful you should be here. Dangerous very it is. Feed the guard, or destroy it, to find the secret passage down. Luck to you.
...that was it? I've already done that shit! Bah, my boy Blue had better appreciate it, anyway. So, what else is there to do today?
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi --- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter? --- Meet out front of castle
Oh, right. I have some major questions for her this time, too. I'm not going to let her beauty distract me tonight. First, I should train up, though, and look impressive in my own right.
...Later that night, after much magic training...
Here we go...
Hey, Katrina, I was...uhh...wow...
You want to see how awesome I am at magic? Look, I can Levitate right on over this gate with ease!
Err, I mean, hey, did you hear about the time I outdueled two wizards down in Africa Tarna?
I love hearing stories of your adventures. I've never met a true Hero before. I was starting to get a little scared out here by myself. I'm so glad you are here. You make me feel so safe.
I've Heroed in many parts of the world, but you are the most attractive person I've ever seen.
Are you flirting with me? Usually, it's the other way around. You are very attractive, after all. It is rather warm tonight, isn't it? My scarf felt too confining. I hope you will excuse the fact I'm not wearing it. I know it's not proper, but I didn't think you would mind.
Oh, I don't mind, I don't think anyone minds...(C'mon, Jim, focus!) Hey, I was wondering, why did you call me here in the first place?
Isn't this a date? I mean, you did meet me here and everything. I wanted so much to speak with you again. You are very handsome, you know. I'd love to kiss you, but I don't think I will just yet. You are far too tempting to resist.
Speaking of tempting to resist, holy shit...I mean, I need to stay focused here. Did you or your family summon me here to Mordavia in the first place?
I've got to be off now. Please meet me again, say, three nights hence? I'll be waiting to see you here.
Katrina walks off into the forest to the west and is quickly gone from sight.
I'll just keep to my thoughts here for a bit. I'll be coherent again by the next set, I promise...
Points tally (starting from 241):
+6 Learn Invisibility Spell from Baba Yaga
+15 Cure Punny's Humor
+6 Rehydrate Dried Domovoi
Total: 268 points out of 500
EDIT: It's still hard to wrap my brain around the fact that Katrina is voiced by the same actress as Commander Shepard. Of course, these are the sorts of roles Jennifer Hale usually does (like Cinderella).
DisruptedCapitalist on
"Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
0
ShimshaiFlush with Success!Isle of EmeraldRegistered Userregular
This is great!
As it always is!
Steam/Origin: Shimshai
0
NocrenLt Futz, Back in ActionNorth CarolinaRegistered Userregular
To be fair, Hale doesn't use this accent often. Usually it's English (Bastilla/Shateel Shan, Mazzy Fenton) or America (Shepard, Totaly Spies).
Sometimes I think Baba Yaga is my favorite character in the series. She's evil, but she's just so polite about it.
Also, please tell me that I'm not the only one who actually giggled at some of those Gnome jokes?
At least he got the punchlines to make sense after he got his humor back. There'll be one more Gnome comedy routine in the next set, which should go up fast since I already have the voices and screenshots ready (another set of me being overambitious and not being able to get an entire day in one set).
0
NocrenLt Futz, Back in ActionNorth CarolinaRegistered Userregular
I found the Gnome's insults a lot funnier.
Though since I played the unpatched version, I never managed to get all the rituals and finish the game.
Okay, I have my bearings again. Now what did I just learn from that expert interrogation?
To-Do:
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle in 3 days
I learned I have 3 days to be a better interrogator. I need to learn more, and quickly.
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Saved Dry Domovoi...now what?
-- Gnome - SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke, doing one last performance
- Leshy Riddles
-- What do the fairies want?
The night is still young, so let's see about those fairies.
Oh, fairies, where are you? Here's a nice Hero, just what you said you needed, am I right?
Fairies? Is that you?
Well, didn't you wake up on the wrong side of the living this morning? Hi, I'm Jim Darkmagic. You may have been dead before I did my thing, but I'm kind of a big deal around here. Let me show you how things roll around here when I'm involved.
You eat flames...
...and I emerge victorious. Everybody wins! Well, except you, but you hardly care, since you were dead in the first place, am I right?
Anyway, where were we? Oh right, fairies. The search continues!
Did I say I wanted fairies? I mean I wanted a staff! Come to papa!
You reach for the glowing staff.
Hey! What the...?
At least I'm still awake this time.
You have been tempted by a mere illusion, but there is a true Staff in Mordavia -- the Staff of Erana. Before the Staff may be claimed, there must be a sacrifice made. One life for that of another. You must bring about that sacrifice!
Already working on it. I think the innkeepers are warming up to the idea.
Once you have completed the sacrifce, you will need to perform the Ritual of Release which you can use to free the Staff from its confinement. I will teach you this ritual. In return, you must come back here when you have Erana's Staff.
Good deal. So, all I need to do is come here with the staff? What happens then?
Fucking fairies. Could just say a pleasant goodbye, you know.
To-Do:
- Leshy Riddles
-- What do the fairies want? Fairies want me to bring them the Staff of Erana
Well, I suppose I should go see that gnome's exit performance. At least make sure the guy leaves town afterwards.
You will be mine. Oh yes, you will be mine.
Hi, I'm here for the comedy routine? No, really.
Yep, I'm here on purpose. Do what you can to make sure that it wasn't a huge mistake on my part.
So you're back. No, it's your front. Take a seat, no, take two, they're small. I've got a joke just for ewe, so don't look so sheepish.
Urge to burn things...rising...
Good Evening, ladies and gentlemen and all you others. I'd like to say how glad I am to be here -- I'd like to say it. Seriously, folks, staying at the Hotel Mordavia has been like staying at a resort. A last resort.
My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked. I couldn't even complain about the room service -- there wasn't any to complain about. And the innkeeper's wife really went out of her way to make me feel at home -- she ignored me completely.
...
I said to the doctor, 'My heart keeps making a strange noise. It keeps on going tick, tick, tick.' 'Aha' said Dr. Cranium. 'Ve have vays of making you tock.'
Next I went to visit the local store. If you don't know what's up, then you haven't seen their prices lately. And the shopkeeper -- what a gossip! She suffers from acute indiscretion. I dislike repeating gossip, but what else can you do with it?
And boy, oh, boy, the monsters in this place. If I ever came face to face with a Revenant, I know what steps I'd take -- long ones. What would I do if I saw a Necrotaur? Hope it didn't see me.
...
So, when you've lost your wit, broken your funny bone, and none of your puns are fun, it helps to have a Hero handy. You know, that reminds me very little of the story about the gravedigger who was so bored he buried himself in his work.
You know, I could tell you more jokes, but you'd only laugh at them. So long and be good. If you can't be good, then be careful.
Hey, John made a pun! On that note, I've seen enough, I think. Later, gnome, hope you find your way out of town quickly.
Yep, I'll just show myself out.
Now it's so long, it's been nice to know you. I like you -- I have no taste, but I like you. If you ever make it to Silmaria, look me up. I never forget a friend, especially if he owes me money.
I'll have to remember that. Silmaria. Never go there.
To-Do:
-- Gnome - SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke - Left for Silmaria, thankfully
Now, I can use a good night's sleep.
Getting tired? I've long since been there. But yet again, some dumbass in the inn is making a fucking racket.
Blue! I saved your dry friend. What's that do for me?
You did good. Domovoi very happy not to be in very bad place. Domovoi very happy not to be dried up. Bad Place Domovoi all better now. Bad Place Domovoi now live in Burgomeister's place. Maybe good luck to Burgomeister.
Good for him. How does that help me?
You help me. I you help. You want be big Hero? You want make many people happy? You want make friends and influence people?
I do enjoy my fair share of praise and worship from grateful people, yes.
Tell you a story. Yuri and Bella have daughter Tanya. Lovely daughter. Laughing daughter. One day, Tanya taken away. All because of doll. Tanya sweet child. Tanya like everyone. Then Bella have dream. Dream Tanya taken away. Bella very scared.
Not let Tanya play outside. Not let Tanya have friends. Tanya get scared of dark. Tanya many times alone at back of inn in dark. One day, monster come. Big monster. Friendly monster. He visit Tanya's window. He talk to Tanya. Tanya not afraid of dark. Tanya now have monster friend.
One night, Tanya very unhappy, so monster take Tanya away. Monster want to make Tanya happy. Now Tanya gone. Tanya gone to castle. No one see Tanya leave. No one see Tanya go. No one but Domovoi. Domovoi try to stop Tanya, but too late. Tanya already outside with monster.
No tell Bella. No tell Yuri. Very bad thing. Tanya need Hero, not dead parents. Only brave, powerful Hero save Tanya.
Yeah...I wouldn't ever want something to happen to Tanya's parents...so where do I come in again?
Bella hide doll in cabinet. You take doll. Tanya love doll. Maybe you help Tanya. No talk Bella. No show Bella doll. Make Bella very scared. Make Bella very unhappy.
You take doll. You take doll to Tanya some day. Some day you very powerful Hero, you take doll to Tanya. Take doll. Become plenty powerful Hero. Then Tanya you help.
Tanya's doll...in this cabinet right here?
Well, she certainly missed her doll. Maybe this will cure her or something.
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi - SAVED - Gave me Tanya's Doll --- Saved Dry Domovoi...now what?
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by 'Aunt Trina'
--- Guarded by Toby the ape
- Castle Borgov
-- Tanya
--- Vampire, daughter of Innkeepers
--- Wants her doll
Now, sleep...
Oh, son of a...now what?
There is definitely some magic interfering with the vision. It is difficult to tell whether I am getting through or not... Either you are mystically rusty or your crystal is dusty. You are not helping. I need to concentrate here. I think I'm starting to get something... Wait, let me see if I can adjust the antenna...
You hear the sudden sound of music and a different voice saying, "And now for something completely different..."
The music and the voices fade as you start to awake.
Yep, nothing like a good night's sleep...that certainly wasn't anything like it, anyway. Breakfast?
So, guys, I'm having a dilemma. I need to take that Staff protecting the town to the fairies for some reason, but I need to sacrifice someone to do it. If I told you I could save your dead daughter by sacrificing one of you, who's most up for it? Come on, everybody wins...
... ...
Right, you guys think it over, and I'll let you know if I can find a better way to nab that staff protecting the entire town from the undead. I'll just let myself out.
This morning blows so far. I feel the need to burn something to cheer myself everyone up.
This should do.
Now, to find something flammable...
If Igor get big Hero job, can he be pyromaniac too?
Follow your dreams, you can reach your goals. I'm living proof.
I actually feel much better now. And I doubt anyone will miss the monastery, either. Everybody really does win! Now, anything else I can take care of this morning?
To-Do:
- Leshy Riddles
-- Fairies want me to bring them the Staff of Erana
Ahh, I can answer that last riddle. I wonder what that'll earn me? Off to find out!
Nyaah ni nah ni naah nah!
Just because I already burned something to the ground today, doesn't mean I'm done burning things. Get it?
Oops! Hi there. Nine and eight makes seventeen, watch out for the Faerie Queen. Cloaked by magic, pale of cheek, what is it that the Faeries seek?
They seek Erana's Staff. But, then again, so do I, so that should be an interesting meetup once that happens, eh?
+2 Answer Leshy Faerie Riddle (270)
I'm almost out of riddles, I'll ask you nothing more, but come back in a while to see what I've in store!
Finally, something for Jim! Ok, Leshy, let me have it!
Leshy, Leshy, riddles done. Thank you much for all the fun.
Mother fucker.
Points tally (starting from 268):
+2 Answer Leshy Faerie Riddle
Total: 270 points out of 500
Yeah, I remember the gnome leaving town, but I don't remember meeting Katrina outside the gates or burning the monastary. (But I do remember the dream of Erasmus.) I dunno. It's been like 12 years since I last tried playing it, I think.
"Simple, real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time." -Mustrum Ridcully in Terry Pratchett's Hogfather p. 142 (HarperPrism 1996)
because it prevents any of these flavor things (meetings with Katrina, dreams at the inn, dreams in the garden, one other thing in the inn I'm trying to trigger yet) from happening anymore. Burning the monastery is a purely optional thing that I just do for fun, because I can.
EDIT: I'm at the point where there's basically nothing of point value I can do until I perform the above spoiler, so I think there'll be one more set where I train up magic and see the rest of the dreams, one last fortune, and one more meetup with Katrina before heading into the endgame sequence. It'll be a set of pure flavor.
Ok, Leshy, next time you pull that shit, you get your own trial by fire. Now, what was I doing before that assault by bush?
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to save Tanya from the castle, using doll
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina --- Meet out front of castle in 3 days
Looks like Tanya is the central character in everyone's business, but I might anger the Dark Master if I just waltzed in and grabbed her. For now, I should probably train to be as strong as I can be to show Katrina what a real hero looks like...
Soon, staff, very soon...
Psh, real heroes use all the weights...
There, that should be easy enough...
You think you've done about as much stair-stepping as your body can handle.
Yeah, I'll be feeling that in the morning. But what's a little training without some magic?
You folks in the audience may think that's simply a looped animation, but the reality is the same, except you'd just stare at that for a good hour. Before I get mind-numbingly bored, though, I feel the pressing need to murder something.
And just look at those guns! Maybe I'll just call em Flame, Frost and Force. What, you only see two guns up there? Well, the third is just going to have to be left to your imagination, then...
That pretty much killed the day nicely. I think I've earned some free garlic dinner.
Evening, everyone. Did you all get a chance to think about my proposal? Who wants to be the quite literal sacrifical lamb? If you are uncomfortable, I'm perfectly willing to perform the sacrificing...
... ... ... ... ...
Hey, now, that staff protecting the entire village from being massacred by the undead isn't going to pull itself out of the hill, now...I'll just show myself to my room, then.
They just need more time to decide.
I'll sleep well tonight, though...
Your sleep is interrupted around midnight. You can hear weeping from somewhere below your room.
Dreams, domovoi, now what?
Seems to be coming from the innkeeper's room...
Eavesdropping is cool when heroing is involved...right?
You must accept it, Bella. Tanya is dead. You will never see her again.
No! I cannot believe it. She can't be. I know she is alive. I know she will come back to us.
Crying will not bring her back to us. This is foolish. Just go to sleep.
How can I sleep, when my baby is not safe? She is at the castle, I know she must be.
Then she must be dead. Bella, there is nothing we can do.
The cries fade off to quiet sobs.
Not to sound even more like an asshole, but not quiet enough! I have to fix this, somehow. Maybe I'll ask Katrina about it when I see her in two days. For now, though...
...more training! I don't think I can sleep here with all this crying, though...
I need to sleep somehwere I'll actually get sleep.
This should be perfect. Why haven't I beel sleeping here all along again?
Oh right...those dreams...
You are in this weird and wonderful place once more. This time you remember all the times you have been here before, and despite the beauty, you are afraid. You listen for the voice. It calls out for you.
...Katrina?...
...I don't remember dying, actually...
You are overwhelmed with horror, and you remember running away. Your lungs struggle in the agony of no air, and you remember screaming.
You are helpless and hopeless, and you remember the eternal loneliness. With all your remaining strength, you reach out to touch the voice.
...Katrina?...
Damn it! I really need to figure out what these dreams are trying to tell me. Oh well, try again tonight, I guess. First, though...breakfast!
So...guys. I realize that I've been kind of an asshole about this whole missing daughter business, and that it may have been insensitive for me to ask you to sacrifice yourselves. And it may have also been a bit selfish of me to do it specifically to take the one thing keeping your town alive. So, for all that, I apologize, and I promise I'll do everything I can to bring your daughter back safely.
... ...
It's okay, I can let myself out. Oh, and thanks for all the breakfasts.
...now, I feel like training some combat spells, namely Force Bolt. Now, where's a good place to practice that...?
Oh hi, Elderbury. I bet you thought I forgot about that little attempted murder business, didn't you? Well, now you're going to help me train for a while...
He weebles and wobbles and doesn't fall down! This is perfect training. I could spend all day doing this...
...and I did, too. Now to figure out this fucking dream...
You reach out to take her hand, and smile as she smiles back at you. You hold open your arms, and she flows into them. You embrace one another, and share your happiness.
...best...dream...ever...come to Jim, Katrina...
You both laugh with joy as you each behold the stranger you have known so long; this friend you have never met, but always cared for, this love you share for the first time and forever.
...wait. First time? Never met? Who are you, mystery woman?
You kiss the lips of the mage Erana.
...!
I...uh...huh? Erana? That's it, I need to go see a professional about this shit.
I need a psychiatrist fortune teller, now!
So, I had a dream that I was making out with Erana, who is dead. Is that weird?
The Magician Erana's death is shrouded in mystery. I do not know her true fate. I only know that her staff protects the town and her garden protects anyone in need of safety.
And gives me fucked-up dreams! Maybe a fortune will tell me more.
Again, the cards are prepared, and they shall reveal what they will.
To-Do:
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Inv High Priestess - Baba Yaga
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
--- Serves Queen of Swords (Dark Master is a woman!)
--- Definitely going to be a pain in my ass again
--- Desires revenge, but can't now
-- Queen of Cups - Katrina
--- Kind and loving and trying to help me
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me
--- Goals are an illusion?
-- Queen of Swords - ?
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Dark Master(!)
Maybe we'll learn more about the Dark Master, then?
Queen of Cups again? That's bullshit!
The woman of loving shall be revealed. What may we now learn of her distant past?
Fine, I'll play along. Maybe it'll be different this time?
This is the sign of magic and creativity. The, as the others who influence your life, has the power. She is one to whom magic has been the strongest influence upon her life. She is a master weaver of spells. What next can we learn?
The Ace of Cups is the sign of overflowing joy and happiness. This is a woman who uses her power joyfully, giving gracefully and lovingly to others. She is generous and loving, and she has shown this through her use of magic. This woman gives from her heart.
I'm loving this info about Katrina more and more...we go on!
Ah, your gentle woman, too, has been bound by something. A crisis has occurred, a defeat or imprisonment by someone. What more can we learn?
Is she actually imprisoned by the Dark Master, then?
This is a sign of balanced force, a stalemate, of things not coming to a resolution. That with which the woman came in conflict has also been held in check. They were locked in battle, or they were both defeated in the past.
So, locked in struggle with the Dark Master, then? This is starting to sound a little concerning...what's next?
The Hanged Man is the symbol of sacrifice. The conflict in the past required this woman to give up something of value. She has paid some great price, but the outcome is uncertain. Let us see the next card.
Alas, this card shows a tomb and someone at final rest. The woman's sacrifice was exile or possibly even death. Yet her sacrifice still affects you somehow. Somehow I cannot believe that her sacrifice was in vain.
Sacrifice? Exile? Katrina isn't in exile...
The Dark One! This is the first time in these readings that the Darkness-which-lies-waiting has been active rather than merely a major influence. Somehow, this woman is bound by the Darkness. Whether she has been subverted, or destroyed, I cannot tell. Something remains, else there would be no reading.
Bound by the Darkness? In what way?
I think that this powerful woman battled with the Dark One. She was defeated, or perhaps sacrificed herself to prevent it from entering this world. But what will be the outcome of all this?
Sacrificed herself in battle with the Dark One? That doesn't sound like Katrina...that sounds like Piotyr's story about Erana. What will affect the Dark One's control, though?
You! Then you are not only a friend to the gypsies, but a great hero as well. Your destiny shall affect the world, my young friend. You will determine the fate of this woman. You shall face the Dark One. Reveal the final influence upon this Reading.
At least I have a purpose here, now. So, what's the overriding influence this time? Void again?
So, the Darkness still covers all. I had hoped that you might be spared...that you might not have to face the Darkness. But that is the way of the Hero, is it not? To face that which others fear and dread?
Well, somebody has to do it, might as well be me!
Okay, I'm still a little confused, though. In the last reading, you turned over what looked like the Queen of Cups, and it sounded a lot more like Katrina, a woman from the castle that I've been meeting up with regularly.
I have no knowledge of such a person. Much is strange about your story. I would not entirely trust this Katrina, if I were you. The Queen of Swords is quite deceptive.
Whoa, whoa, Queen of Swords?! So, then Erana really is the Queen of Cups, then...and if Katrina is the Queen of Swords, that means...
To-Do:
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me -- Queen of Swords - ?
--- Either deceiver or deceived --- Dark Master(!)
Katrina is the Dark Master! She brought me here! But why?...Oh, shit! I'm meeting up with her in a day! So, what do I know now?
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- High Priestess - Baba Yaga
-- Queen of Cups - KatrinaErana!
--- Kind and loving and trying to help me
--- Bound by the Dark One, trapped in battle
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina!
--- Dark Master!
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me(!)
--- Cares for Tanya in Castle
--- Goals are an illusion?
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
- Rituals of the Dark One: -- 5. Mouth - Taken by castle people. Katrina used it to get me out?
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter? DARK MASTER!
--- Meet out front of castle TONIGHT
-- Stranger
--- Referred to as Dark Master (!) Must be Ad Avis, then!
--- Not well liked by most in castle
-- Why did they bring me here?
So, she's the Dark Master, brought me here in the first place, is in charge of Ad Avis at the castle, cares for Tanya, wants to see me for some unknown purpose, may actually love me, and probably has the Mouth Ritual? Holy fucking shit! I need to do some serious training, and fast!
Serpents are no match for Jim Darkmagic! I need to get this Flame Dart to Dark Master levels, now!
Okay, maxed out that spell. Now I'm all prepared for...
...now remember, Jim. She doesn't know that you know she's the Dark Master. Now be subtle, be subtle...
I wanted to ask a favor of you. I need your help. I'm trying to find...Oh, but we hardly even know one another, and here I am asking you for favors. I'm sorry. It's just that this is so important to me that I couldn't wait to ask you. It's strange how much I look forward to seeing you. I've never really cared about men before.
...wow...
What can I do to serve you, Lady Master?
I wanted you to find some things for me. But it's really too dangerous. I'd hate for you to get hurt trying to help me. Never mind. Besides, I don't even know if I can trust you yet.
I'm trustworthy, really! And I'm really strong!
I need someone dependable; someone who will face danger willingly for me. Perhaps when we get to know one another better, I'll be able to tell if you are the one I need.
But I am! Just tell me where to go!
I know that one of the things I need is hidden in the swamp. You have to be very strong or clever to avoid getting killed there. I'm not sure you are ready to face the dangers awaiting you in that dismal place.
I can and have! Just give me a chance, Lady Master Katrina!
Please, work on your skills before we next meet. Mordavia is a very dangerous place. I do need your help, but I don't want anything harmful to happen to you. Farewell.
...damn it! Smooth, Jim, really smooth. She needs some things, though, one of which is in the swamp? She wants the Rituals! Good thing I've already got four.
...but, really? Not ready yet?Train up my skills?! I'll show her how much of a hero I can really be. I just need to sleep on it to get an idea...
One more dream, Erana? It's not cheating if I'm sleeping, right?
The Darkness reaches for you. The tendrils of twisted magic writhe around you, sucking at your very soul. Your Staff is torn away. Your magic is sheared from you, and you lie defenseless before the all-devouring blackness.
Aww, this is the shitty dream...
You are swallowed by the Darkness. Now you draw forth the last of your power -- your very life force. With your final spell, you bind the Darkness from within, and send it back to the Chaos from which it came.
It takes you with it.
Okay, Erana, I get it now. I'll do you right. I'll go save Tanya.
Points tally (starting from 270):
+0 Learn to do what is right
Total: 270 points out of 500
There are actually three additional inn dreams (one dark master, two mysterious wizard), but to my knowledge, they are randomly triggered, and I have been unable to trigger them. At this point, I think I've covered enough optional stuff to just go forward with the main plot. The Dark Master dream is only tangentially related to the plot (it's mostly just more bitching about how useless you are), and the mysterious wizard dreams are completely unrelated to the plot (just to be funny).
EDIT: And part of why this took a week to post is that I spent a good four evenings grinding up magic. Basically just watch each training animated GIF for three hours, and you get the general idea.
There are actually three additional inn dreams (one dark master, two mysterious wizard), but to my knowledge, they are randomly triggered, and I have been unable to trigger them. At this point, I think I've covered enough optional stuff to just go forward with the main plot. The Dark Master dream is only tangentially related to the plot (it's mostly just more bitching about how useless you are), and the mysterious wizard dreams are completely unrelated to the plot (just to be funny)
EDIT: And part of why this took a week to post is that I spent a good four evenings grinding up magic. Basically just watch each training animated GIF for three hours, and you get the general idea.
"Mysterious wizard"? You mean Erasmus? I know he tries to find you while you're sleeping at least once.
There are actually three additional inn dreams (one dark master, two mysterious wizard), but to my knowledge, they are randomly triggered, and I have been unable to trigger them. At this point, I think I've covered enough optional stuff to just go forward with the main plot. The Dark Master dream is only tangentially related to the plot (it's mostly just more bitching about how useless you are), and the mysterious wizard dreams are completely unrelated to the plot (just to be funny)
EDIT: And part of why this took a week to post is that I spent a good four evenings grinding up magic. Basically just watch each training animated GIF for three hours, and you get the general idea.
"Mysterious wizard"? You mean
Erasmus?
I know he tries to find you while you're sleeping at least once.
Technically that isn't known until the end of the game, and I'm trying to spoil as little as possible.
Good morning, staff. Today is the day that shit gets done.
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to save Tanya from the castle, using doll
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by 'Aunt Trina'
--- Guarded by Toby the ape
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina!
--- Dark Master!
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me (real?)
--- Cares for Tanya in Castle --- Wants me to prove my worth
--- Goals are an illusion?
--- Why bring me here? To get the rituals
- MISC
-- Get Erana's staff in front of town
--- Cast Destiny Spell
--- Requires one dead thing and one living thing to sacrifice itself
--- Faeries want me to bring it to them
Saving Tanya ought to impress a whole host of folks. But first...breakfast, of course!
Hey, guys. I'm going to need to load up on garlic this morning, because I have a castle to infiltrate. Still haven't figured out exactly how I'm going to deal with that whole sacrifice business, though. You folks have any ideas?
... ...
Huge help, guys. Well, think fast, because at some point I'm just going to have to start spraying Flame Darts until it all works....I'll just let myself out.
To the cemetery!
Now, I know Igor gave me the key and all, but I'm a wizard. And wizards simply don't roll that way. Open!
And, in we go.
Here, though, I'm using the key. Don't tell any other wizards, it's embarrassing.
No problem. Now, straight to Tanya's room!
Err...Tanya?
The monster doesn't seem to like you letting light into the room. Maybe you would have better luck at night.
What's that, John? You think I should wait until nightfall to save a vampire? Fine, I'll just explore the rest of this place, then.
Hello? Anyone home? Someone's here to prove how useful they really are...nobody? Oh well, I guess you're all sleeping.
Hmm...this place is new, I wonder what's down this way?
Yet another unused bed. And a giant fucking chest. Let's Trigger to make sure it's not magically enchanted...
Huh, I guess it's magically enchanted, then. But I know something you don't know, Mr. Wraith...
I am also magically enchanted.
Finally, the Wraith vanishes under the force of your onslaught, its ties to this world severed at last. In the chest you find a small flask labelled "Healing" and 25 Crowns. Pretty nice for a few minutes work!
Sure, but lousy for killing time until nightfall. Guess I'll just have to grind magic again until the sun sets outside...
...That evening...
Okay, back to Tanya...
Who is it this time, Toby?
Rorrah graraff hroorarrr.
I think that's Ape for "Your Hero and Savior."
Hello. Do you live in the castle now too?
Don't remember me, then? Maybe you'll remember this doll...
What's that you got? Toby, let him in.
Rorr, arraghra rarrar.
Toby, he has our dolly!
+15 Give the Doll to Tanya (295)
Oh, Vana, I thought I lost you! Look, Toby! It's Vana. Thank you for bringing her to me. I thought she was lost. Where did you find her?
It was at the inn. The folks there are fairly insane about garlic, though, so you may want to be careful with that. It's pretty sad, really.
If I went back to the Inn, I'd never be afraid of the dark again.
Rrrooghra arrogrooora.
Toby says that everyone would be afraid of me now. I don't want them to be afraid of me.
I don't think that'd be a problem. Your mommy cries herself to sleep at night. It makes it hard to get a decent night's rest there, actually.
I miss my Mommy. Sometimes I want to cry but I can't anymore. I just feel sad.
Actually, on that subject, there may be a way to make you a normal person again. We can use Erana's Staff in front of town to do it.
I like the Staff. It always made such pretty flowers in town. You say it will make me all better and I won't be a Bad Thing anymore?
Sure, except...never mind.
Oh, Toby! I can see Mommy and Daddy again!
Grorarro ooraroogt?
Toby asks what else will the staff do?
Well...it may require a sacrifice to bring you back to life...
Rrorra grourraoo.
Toby says he understands. He says you should take us to the Staff now, so I can be with Mommy and Daddy again!
Well...okay, let's get out of here, then...
...and here we are! Let me just start up the ritual, and see if the folks at the inn figured out who to use as a sacrifice...
Will you trade your Life to give Life to the child?
Will you die willingly for the one you love?
Uh huh.
No, Toby! No!
So shall the sacrifice be done!
So is the Sacrifice complete! I am again the Staff of Erana.
+25 Save Tanya and Get Staff of Erana (310)
I love you too, Toby.
...Tanya, we should probably get to the inn...
You take the sobbing child in your arms and carry her to the Inn. You awaken her parents and are overwhelmed by their gratitude and joy. It is long before you manage to escape to the peace of your own room for what is left of the night.
Well, that was some night. Breakfast?
So, after all that time I gave you, it was the monster that gave himself up for her life. Aren't you so glad you tried to keep her from him for all that time?
He may have looked like a monster, but he obviously had a heart and mind of great kindness.
Damn straight. To Toby!
Oh, and Tanya, while you're here, is there anything else you can tell me about Katrina or Ad Avis?
I didn't like him. He didn't like me. He didn't like Katrina, either. They were always having fights, but he had to do what she told him to do. That made him very mad.
Heh, now that is funny. Makes me like Katrina even more, actually.
Now that I have the Staff, what's the next step again?
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi --- Wants me to save Tanya from the castle, using doll SAVED
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife --- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by 'Aunt Trina'
--- Guarded by Toby the ape SAVED
-- Nikolai - SAVED by letting him die and join Anna
-- Gypsy - SAVED by rescuing Igor
-- Crazium - SAVED because I know formulas like a boss
-- Gnome - SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke
-- Burgo - Just wants peace, not a bad guy, grandson of Piotyr
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina!
--- Dark Master!
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me (real?) --- Cares for Tanya in Castle --- Wants me to prove my worth Saving Tanya ought to do that
--- Goals are an illusion?
--- Why bring me here? To get the rituals
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
--- Serves Queen of Swords (Dark Master is a woman!)
--- Definitely going to be a pain in my ass again
--- Desires revenge, but can't now
- MISC -- Get Erana's staff in front of town
--- Cast Destiny Spell
--- Requires one dead thing and one living thing to sacrifice itself
--- Faeries want me to bring Staff to them
Suppose I should go find those fairies, and see why they were so interested in having me bring this staff to them. I'll just kill time until night...and then...
Hello? Fairies?
Good news. I managed to get this Staff of Erana, and...
Hey! The fuck is this?
The human has returned with the Staff. We shall finally gain what we have sought for so long. Staff of Erana, hear my command! I, Tatiana, Queen of the Faerie Folk, summon thee and claim thee for my own!
Aww, hell no!
Staff, hear my command! Thou shalt hear and obey my words. I am thy master now!
You feel an incredible rush of magical energy filling you. It tickles. You hear a voice in your head:
I am now the Staff of the Hero. He is the hand of destiny, and shall restore the spirit of Erana.
Hey, faeries! Guess what? Turns out I just remembered another spell!
Summon Staff: 200
You're damned right.
So, the human has claimed the Staff of Erana? Then by his death, the Staff shall be mine! Guards, destroy that human creature!
With what, your magic? Reversal, bitch!
The human has a spell which reverses spells. Use your area attacks!
And now you've officially crossed the line. Eat Darkmagic vengeance, bitch!
A voice sounds in your mind: "Hand of Destiny, you are now triumphant. She who would use me for her own glory is defeated. You shall now have the spell of Resistance.
Resistance: 100
Good deal...and what's this?
+15 Chase Away Faeries and get Heart Ritual (325)
To-Do:
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 1. Bone - HAVE - Tombstone in swamp
-- 2. Sense - HAVE - Squid Stone
-- 3. Breath - HAVE - Baba Yaga
-- 4. Blood - HAVE - Monastery
-- 5. Mouth - Katrina probably has it
-- 6. Heart - Given to Gregor, missing and likely dead HAVE! - Faeries!
- MISC --- Faeries want me to bring Staff to them Well, fuck them, it's mine now!
Poor Gregor, probably also tricked and possibly killed by those bitches. It's been a long couple days, though. Time to head back to the inn for a good night's sleep.
Up and over...
Hero with Erana's Staff, coming through...let me in!
Aww...guys! Your Hero has arrived! And I come bearing the Staff of Erana!
It sounds like you have been through many dangers in Mordavia.
It seems you are a very brave Hero here.
Can I have your autograph?
Of course, anything for my adoring fans!
You find yourself signing your autograph for everyone here and getting a bad case of writer's cramp. Such is the price of glory.
So, fans, any gossip that might be useful to me tonight?
Oh, very well. Maybe we do gossip once in a while.
Perhaps we do tell things about others occasionally.
But we never repeat gossip, so try to get it straight the first time we tell it.
Actually, this gossip is about you.
Someone overheard Tanya playing where the staff used to be.
She was singing, 'Trina's in love. Trina loves a human. Trina's in love.'
Since you are the only human having any dealings with that Vampire...
We thought you might be interested in that story..
You can never tell about some people, unless you're a gossip.
That's...good to know, actually.
To-Do:
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina! - Dark Master!
--- In love with me (real?!)
I always enjoy a good showering of praise...but what I can really use is a good night's sleep.
Finally!
What's this, now?
The note says "Meet me at the castle gates tonight. We have much to talk about. -- Katrina"
Yep, even the Dark Master is aware of how awesome I am now. Everything's coming up Jim Darkmagic!
Points tally (starting from 270):
+15 Give Doll to Tanya
+25 Save Tanya and Get Staff of Erana
+15 Defeat Faeries and Get Heart Ritual
Total: 325 points out of 500
What about if we call it & (or the staff formerly known as the Staff of Erana)?
0
NocrenLt Futz, Back in ActionNorth CarolinaRegistered Userregular
That QfGV mention reminds me of the paladin's opening.
Rakeesh greats you in Silmaria after Erasmus summons.
Rakeesh: My Friend! There is much work to be done here and I brought Soulforge for you to use!
(if you played paladin in 4)
R: I see you already have a paladin sword....
That QfGV mention reminds me of the paladin's opening.
Rakeesh greats you in Silmaria after Erasmus summons.
Rakeesh: My Friend! There is much work to be done here and I brought Soulforge for you to use!
(if you played paladin in 4)
R: I see you already have a paladin sword....
That QfGV mention reminds me of the paladin's opening.
Rakeesh greats you in Silmaria after Erasmus summons.
Rakeesh: My Friend! There is much work to be done here and I brought Soulforge for you to use!
(if you played paladin in 4)
R: I see you already have a paladin sword....
What happens if
You were a paladin in 3 but not in 4?
If you skipped classes and didn't get Pytor's sword you would use Soulforge instead. I think Rakeesh is pretty much retired at that point and mostly busy with investigating the major plot of the game's background (Major story event that sets QfG5 in motion, but happens before you even start playing)
of finding out who killed the King while you're busy competing for the throne. I think he is also making sure that you're safe during the games as well.
Posts
Set Music - Punny Bones - The Gnome
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome
--- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by Katrina
--- Guarded by Toby the ape
-- Nikolai - SAVED by letting him die and join Anna
-- Gypsy - SAVED by rescuing Igor
-- Crazium - SAVED because I know formulas like a boss
-- Burgo - Just wants peace, not a bad guy, grandson of Piotyr
- Leshy Riddles
-- What do the fairies want?
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Inv High Priestess - Baba Yaga
--- Will help me if I give her "food"
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
--- Serves Queen of Swords (Dark Master is a woman!)
--- Definitely going to be a pain in my ass again
--- Desires revenge, but can't now
-- Queen of Cups - Katrina
--- Kind and loving and trying to help me
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me
--- Goals are an illusion?
-- Queen of Swords - ?
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Dark Master(!)
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 1. Bone - HAVE - Tombstone in swamp
-- 2. Sense - HAVE - Squid Stone
-- 3. ? - Stolen from Hangman Tree, possibly by Baba Yaga
-- 4. Blood - HAVE - Monastery
-- 5. Mouth - Taken by castle people. Katrina used it to get me out?
-- 6. Heart - Given to Gregor, missing and likely dead
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle
-- Tanya
--- Vampire, daughter of Innkeepers
-- Stranger
--- Referred to as Dark Master (!)
--- Not well liked by most in castle
- MISC
-- Get Erana's staff in front of town
--- Cast Destiny Spell
--- Requires one dead thing and one living thing to sacrifice itself
-- How did I get here?
-- Who brought me here?
-- How in blazes can I get out of here?
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome
--- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Inv High Priestess - Baba Yaga
--- Will help me if I give her "food"
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 3. ? - Stolen from Hangman Tree, possibly by Baba Yaga
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle
- MISC
-- How did I get here?
-- Who brought me here?
To-Do:
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle
- MISC
-- How did I get here?
-- Who brought me here?
-- The folks at the castle brought me here, but why?
It can be used in either of two ways. Its main purpose is to bring a Dark One across to this world. However, a very powerful wizard could use it to send the Dark One back to its world.
You put the Breath Ritual away in your pack.
To-Do:
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 3. Breath - HAVE - Baba Yaga
+6 Learn Invisibility Spell from Baba Yaga (247)
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome
--- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
+15 Restore Punny's Humor (262)
Do you know why Gnome jokes are so short? So that they won't go over the Dwarves' heads. There's no point in telling a Dwarf a joke with a double meaning. He won't get either one. Judging from the expression, 'What you don't know can't hurt you,' Dwarves are practically invulnerable.
Of course, far be it from me to say that all Dwarves are just plain dumb. Most are pretty greedy, too. Dwarves get their money the hoard way. They won't even spend the time a day. Dwarves don't care how people treat them, as long as they do.
Of course, you know what you got when the singing dragon fell into the Dwarf mine? 'A flat miner.' And on that note, let's change the subject.
Before ya blow, Joe, I figure Iowa. I'm going ta let ya in on a secret only we Gnomes know. I'm going ta tell ya the Ultimate Joke. Don't wince, Vince. This is straight, mate. Ya tell this one, and whoever hears it is going ta laugh. Really laugh. Can't help it, can't stop it kind of laugh.
Only works once, and should only be used in last resorts, Mort. It's the last laugh, so ta speak. The best jest of the west. Yours fer the telling.
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
-- Gnome
--- Humor stolen by Baba Yaga
--- Got Good Humor Bar for him
--- SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke to distract someone once.
+6 Rehydrate Dried Domovoi (268)
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to rehydrate his friend at the "bad place", likely Monastery
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle
...Later that night, after much magic training...
Points tally (starting from 241):
+6 Learn Invisibility Spell from Baba Yaga
+15 Cure Punny's Humor
+6 Rehydrate Dried Domovoi
Total: 268 points out of 500
Voices...in!
LULZ
EDIT: It's still hard to wrap my brain around the fact that Katrina is voiced by the same actress as Commander Shepard. Of course, these are the sorts of roles Jennifer Hale usually does (like Cinderella).
As it always is!
Also, please tell me that I'm not the only one who actually giggled at some of those Gnome jokes?
At least he got the punchlines to make sense after he got his humor back. There'll be one more Gnome comedy routine in the next set, which should go up fast since I already have the voices and screenshots ready (another set of me being overambitious and not being able to get an entire day in one set).
Though since I played the unpatched version, I never managed to get all the rituals and finish the game.
Set Music - Fairy Fountain
To-Do:
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter?
--- Meet out front of castle in 3 days
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Saved Dry Domovoi...now what?
-- Gnome - SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke, doing one last performance
- Leshy Riddles
-- What do the fairies want?
Anyway, where were we? Oh right, fairies. The search continues!
To-Do:
- Leshy Riddles
-- What do the fairies want? Fairies want me to bring them the Staff of Erana
My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked. I couldn't even complain about the room service -- there wasn't any to complain about. And the innkeeper's wife really went out of her way to make me feel at home -- she ignored me completely.
...
I said to the doctor, 'My heart keeps making a strange noise. It keeps on going tick, tick, tick.' 'Aha' said Dr. Cranium. 'Ve have vays of making you tock.'
Next I went to visit the local store. If you don't know what's up, then you haven't seen their prices lately. And the shopkeeper -- what a gossip! She suffers from acute indiscretion. I dislike repeating gossip, but what else can you do with it?
And boy, oh, boy, the monsters in this place. If I ever came face to face with a Revenant, I know what steps I'd take -- long ones. What would I do if I saw a Necrotaur? Hope it didn't see me.
...
So, when you've lost your wit, broken your funny bone, and none of your puns are fun, it helps to have a Hero handy. You know, that reminds me very little of the story about the gravedigger who was so bored he buried himself in his work.
You know, I could tell you more jokes, but you'd only laugh at them. So long and be good. If you can't be good, then be careful.
To-Do:
-- Gnome - SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke - Left for Silmaria, thankfully
Not let Tanya play outside. Not let Tanya have friends. Tanya get scared of dark. Tanya many times alone at back of inn in dark. One day, monster come. Big monster. Friendly monster. He visit Tanya's window. He talk to Tanya. Tanya not afraid of dark. Tanya now have monster friend.
One night, Tanya very unhappy, so monster take Tanya away. Monster want to make Tanya happy. Now Tanya gone. Tanya gone to castle. No one see Tanya leave. No one see Tanya go. No one but Domovoi. Domovoi try to stop Tanya, but too late. Tanya already outside with monster.
No tell Bella. No tell Yuri. Very bad thing. Tanya need Hero, not dead parents. Only brave, powerful Hero save Tanya.
You take doll. You take doll to Tanya some day. Some day you very powerful Hero, you take doll to Tanya. Take doll. Become plenty powerful Hero. Then Tanya you help.
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi - SAVED - Gave me Tanya's Doll
--- Saved Dry Domovoi...now what?
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by 'Aunt Trina'
--- Guarded by Toby the ape
- Castle Borgov
-- Tanya
--- Vampire, daughter of Innkeepers
--- Wants her doll
There is definitely some magic interfering with the vision. It is difficult to tell whether I am getting through or not...
Either you are mystically rusty or your crystal is dusty.
You are not helping. I need to concentrate here. I think I'm starting to get something...
Wait, let me see if I can adjust the antenna...
The music and the voices fade as you start to awake.
I actually feel much better now. And I doubt anyone will miss the monastery, either. Everybody really does win! Now, anything else I can take care of this morning?
To-Do:
- Leshy Riddles
-- Fairies want me to bring them the Staff of Erana
+2 Answer Leshy Faerie Riddle (270)
Points tally (starting from 268):
+2 Answer Leshy Faerie Riddle
Total: 270 points out of 500
Magic:
Voices...in!
EDIT: I'm at the point where there's basically nothing of point value I can do until I perform the above spoiler, so I think there'll be one more set where I train up magic and see the rest of the dreams, one last fortune, and one more meetup with Katrina before heading into the endgame sequence. It'll be a set of pure flavor.
Set Music - Hotel Mordavia
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to save Tanya from the castle, using doll
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Meet out front of castle in 3 days
You are in this weird and wonderful place once more. This time you remember all the times you have been here before, and despite the beauty, you are afraid. You listen for the voice. It calls out for you.
You are overwhelmed with horror, and you remember running away. Your lungs struggle in the agony of no air, and you remember screaming.
You are helpless and hopeless, and you remember the eternal loneliness. With all your remaining strength, you reach out to touch the voice.
...now, I feel like training some combat spells, namely Force Bolt. Now, where's a good place to practice that...?
You reach out to take her hand, and smile as she smiles back at you. You hold open your arms, and she flows into them. You embrace one another, and share your happiness.
You both laugh with joy as you each behold the stranger you have known so long; this friend you have never met, but always cared for, this love you share for the first time and forever.
You kiss the lips of the mage Erana.
To-Do:
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Inv High Priestess - Baba Yaga
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
--- Serves Queen of Swords (Dark Master is a woman!)
--- Definitely going to be a pain in my ass again
--- Desires revenge, but can't now
-- Queen of Cups - Katrina
--- Kind and loving and trying to help me
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me
--- Goals are an illusion?
-- Queen of Swords - ?
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Dark Master(!)
This is the sign of magic and creativity. The, as the others who influence your life, has the power. She is one to whom magic has been the strongest influence upon her life. She is a master weaver of spells. What next can we learn?
The Ace of Cups is the sign of overflowing joy and happiness. This is a woman who uses her power joyfully, giving gracefully and lovingly to others. She is generous and loving, and she has shown this through her use of magic. This woman gives from her heart.
Ah, your gentle woman, too, has been bound by something. A crisis has occurred, a defeat or imprisonment by someone. What more can we learn?
This is a sign of balanced force, a stalemate, of things not coming to a resolution. That with which the woman came in conflict has also been held in check. They were locked in battle, or they were both defeated in the past.
The Hanged Man is the symbol of sacrifice. The conflict in the past required this woman to give up something of value. She has paid some great price, but the outcome is uncertain. Let us see the next card.
Alas, this card shows a tomb and someone at final rest. The woman's sacrifice was exile or possibly even death. Yet her sacrifice still affects you somehow. Somehow I cannot believe that her sacrifice was in vain.
The Dark One! This is the first time in these readings that the Darkness-which-lies-waiting has been active rather than merely a major influence. Somehow, this woman is bound by the Darkness. Whether she has been subverted, or destroyed, I cannot tell. Something remains, else there would be no reading.
You! Then you are not only a friend to the gypsies, but a great hero as well. Your destiny shall affect the world, my young friend. You will determine the fate of this woman. You shall face the Dark One. Reveal the final influence upon this Reading.
To-Do:
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Queen of Swords - ?
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Dark Master(!)
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- High Priestess - Baba Yaga
-- Queen of Cups - Katrina Erana!
--- Kind and loving and trying to help me
--- Bound by the Dark One, trapped in battle
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina!
--- Dark Master!
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me(!)
--- Cares for Tanya in Castle
--- Goals are an illusion?
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 5. Mouth - Taken by castle people. Katrina used it to get me out?
- Castle Borgov
-- Katrina
--- Cares for Tanya
--- Also HOT
--- Master's Daughter? DARK MASTER!
--- Meet out front of castle TONIGHT
-- Stranger
--- Referred to as Dark Master (!) Must be Ad Avis, then!
--- Not well liked by most in castle
-- Why did they bring me here?
...but, really? Not ready yet? Train up my skills?! I'll show her how much of a hero I can really be. I just need to sleep on it to get an idea...
The Darkness reaches for you. The tendrils of twisted magic writhe around you, sucking at your very soul. Your Staff is torn away. Your magic is sheared from you, and you lie defenseless before the all-devouring blackness.
You are swallowed by the Darkness. Now you draw forth the last of your power -- your very life force. With your final spell, you bind the Darkness from within, and send it back to the Chaos from which it came.
It takes you with it.
Points tally (starting from 270):
+0 Learn to do what is right
Total: 270 points out of 500
Voices...in!
EDIT: And part of why this took a week to post is that I spent a good four evenings grinding up magic. Basically just watch each training animated GIF for three hours, and you get the general idea.
Technically that isn't known until the end of the game, and I'm trying to spoil as little as possible.
Magic User 63 - The Heart of the Matter
Set Music - Tanya and Toby
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to save Tanya from the castle, using doll
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by 'Aunt Trina'
--- Guarded by Toby the ape
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina!
--- Dark Master!
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me (real?)
--- Cares for Tanya in Castle
--- Wants me to prove my worth
--- Goals are an illusion?
--- Why bring me here? To get the rituals
- MISC
-- Get Erana's staff in front of town
--- Cast Destiny Spell
--- Requires one dead thing and one living thing to sacrifice itself
--- Faeries want me to bring it to them
...That evening...
+15 Give the Doll to Tanya (295)
The Sacrifice of Life for Love. Your love for the child is great.
You see Toby silently nod his head.
Will you trade your Life to give Life to the child?
Will you die willingly for the one you love?
So shall the sacrifice be done!
So is the Sacrifice complete! I am again the Staff of Erana.
+25 Save Tanya and Get Staff of Erana (310)
Oh, and Tanya, while you're here, is there anything else you can tell me about Katrina or Ad Avis?
Now that I have the Staff, what's the next step again?
To-Do:
- Townsfolk:
-- Domovoi
--- Wants me to save Tanya from the castle, using doll SAVED
-- Innkeeper Yuri and wife
--- Missing daughter Tanya
--- Vampire in Castle Borgov, cared for by 'Aunt Trina'
--- Guarded by Toby the ape SAVED
-- Nikolai - SAVED by letting him die and join Anna
-- Gypsy - SAVED by rescuing Igor
-- Crazium - SAVED because I know formulas like a boss
-- Gnome - SAVED - Gave me Ultimate Joke
-- Burgo - Just wants peace, not a bad guy, grandson of Piotyr
- Fortune: 4 Folks that affect me
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina!
--- Dark Master!
--- Either deceiver or deceived
--- Suffered hardships in past
--- Bound to the present
--- In love with me (real?)
--- Cares for Tanya in Castle
--- Wants me to prove my worth Saving Tanya ought to do that
--- Goals are an illusion?
--- Why bring me here? To get the rituals
-- Inv King of Coins - Ad Avis
--- Serves Queen of Swords (Dark Master is a woman!)
--- Definitely going to be a pain in my ass again
--- Desires revenge, but can't now
- MISC
-- Get Erana's staff in front of town
--- Cast Destiny Spell
--- Requires one dead thing and one living thing to sacrifice itself
--- Faeries want me to bring Staff to them
I am now the Staff of the Hero. He is the hand of destiny, and shall restore the spirit of Erana.
+15 Chase Away Faeries and get Heart Ritual (325)
To-Do:
- Rituals of the Dark One:
-- 1. Bone - HAVE - Tombstone in swamp
-- 2. Sense - HAVE - Squid Stone
-- 3. Breath - HAVE - Baba Yaga
-- 4. Blood - HAVE - Monastery
-- 5. Mouth - Katrina probably has it
-- 6. Heart - Given to Gregor, missing and likely dead HAVE! - Faeries!
- MISC
--- Faeries want me to bring Staff to them Well, fuck them, it's mine now!
To-Do:
-- Queen of Swords - Katrina! - Dark Master!
--- In love with me (real?!)
Points tally (starting from 270):
+15 Give Doll to Tanya
+25 Save Tanya and Get Staff of Erana
+15 Defeat Faeries and Get Heart Ritual
Total: 325 points out of 500
Voices added.
Handmade Jewelry by me on EtsyGames for sale
Me on Twitch!
I vote for Shaft Jr.
Shaft-rana? Nope.
Stana? Eh..
Yeah, I got nothing.
I'll open the naming vote to the floor.
My idea was to name it Toby.
I like Toby. Nice remembrance of who helped you actually get it.
It calls itself Staff of the Hero.
And it's not like
Also, I'm starting to wonder who you'll romance in QfGV
I picked the latter for my Paladin, especially since the former wasn't a choice.
Edit: Considering this is Jim, he'll probably try to romance EVERYONE. Even Rakeesh.
Well, yeah, but that's even more of a mouthful. :P
What about if we call it & (or the staff formerly known as the Staff of Erana)?
Rakeesh: My Friend! There is much work to be done here and I brought Soulforge for you to use!
(if you played paladin in 4)
R: I see you already have a paladin sword....
Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
Wilds of Aladrion: [https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/comment/43159014/#Comment_43159014]Ellandryn[/url]