There's no job thread? Now there is!

Kakodaimonos · May 2012

I like our old trader.

"Welcome to prop trading. You're either fucking someone over or getting fucked over. You get fucked over too much, we fire you. Always be the fuckor, not the fuckee."

DrZiplock · May 2012

That right there is pretty solid advice for a lot of things.

Abracadaniel · May 2012

UUUUUUUUgh.

One of our customers is using some janky chat client that does video, voice, file sharing, etc. and they wanted to know if their two customer service guys here could have it installed on their machines. Looked at the app, it's fine, I don't have any issues with it. But for the fucking life of me, it will not connect. We've fiddled with our firewall settings and at one point temporarily set everything open and still no dice. I decided to try it from home and it installed just fine, not a single issue.

(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

FIREWALLS

DrZiplock · May 2012

The answer is:

"Unfortunately, no. We're not able to instal that particular chat client onto our CS rep's computers. It lacks the security we require while conducting business online. If you'd like, I can recommend some enterprise level chat programs that are more secure."

Nogs · May 2012

DrZiplock wrote: »

The answer is:

"Unfortunately, no. We're not able to instal that particular chat client onto our CS rep's computers. It lacks the security we require while conducting business online. If you'd like, I can recommend some enterprise level chat programs that are more secure."

our IT department just goes "look customer service rep, you can install it yourself and try to get it to work, but we are not supporting it, as it is not required software to do your business."

which is fine, but it's also their excuse for not upgrading to windows 7. everyone is still on XP.

DrZiplock · May 2012

Double edged sword, indeed.

Blake T · May 2012

Nogs wrote: »

DrZiplock wrote: »

The answer is:

"Unfortunately, no. We're not able to instal that particular chat client onto our CS rep's computers. It lacks the security we require while conducting business online. If you'd like, I can recommend some enterprise level chat programs that are more secure."

our IT department just goes "look customer service rep, you can install it yourself and try to get it to work, but we are not supporting it, as it is not required software to do your business."

which is fine, but it's also their excuse for not upgrading to windows 7. everyone is still on XP.

I quite literally opened a computer with xp and started one program.

That was painful.

Abracadaniel · May 2012

So so glad I was able to upgrade all the workstations here.

Win 7, 64 bit, minimum of 4GB RAM, i5s and 22inch dual monitors all around.

But still they complain about how slow they are.

Abracadaniel · May 2012

Up until a year ago you were rocking a Pentium 2 with 256MB on XP on a single 15in monitor.

Fuck yooooou

Yukira · May 2012

There is a salesman who refuses to upgrade Office past 2003. The Office 2007/2010 compatibility tool stopped opening more recent files on his computer, so he has other people open them, and convert them to an Office 2003 format.

He is going to be very upset when his computer is finally replaced an has Office 2010 installed. We no longer have 2003 in any form.

Beasteh · May 2012

interview went rather well

i had a panic attack just before i went in but managed to keep it under control

Tef · May 2012

I think it's probably because my work computer needs don't extend past MS Word and PowerPoint that the Core 2 Duo, 1gb ram and discrete ATi card running XP on dual 1920 x 1024 monitors works just fine for me. Of course, if i was running some engineering programs or anything else intensive I could see why a setup like mine would be like pulling teeth

Aretè · May 2012

Our entire environment here is XP/2003. I have until the end of June to migrate our users to 2010. Should be fun, this office has a decent amount of luddites that abhor any sort of change. After that we will work on changing over to windows 7. Right now I have two VMs one XP and the other window's 7 for testing. The problem is getting our traders upgraded, thankfully our entire environment is virtualizated. No physical PCs only thin clients, so if someone's machine shits the bed, just a matter of assigning them a new one through mgmt console

Tef · May 2012

Yeah, we started using the new version of office recently and we had people adamant that it was the end of days.

Yukira · May 2012

Nearly the entire company is on Windows 7 except a few diagnostic laptops that have Windows XP because the vendor refuses to update the program.

JoeUser · May 2012

My last day at this current project! Weird, I've been here for more than 2 years.

Kwoaru · May 2012

What do you actually do, Joe

Hunter · May 2012

He's literally a red panda. He's just switching zoos.

Edcrab · May 2012

He's actually a hired killer, and compensates by spreading cuteness

JoeUser · May 2012

Kwoaru wrote: »

What do you actually do, Joe

I'm a "consultant" generally speaking, but I do software architecture and development, focusing on .NET and other Microsoft technology.

Edcrab · May 2012

Man he even put the consultant in quotation marks! What did I tell you!

Abracadaniel · May 2012

Most of the workstations are running Office 2003

Because at some point we got a legit installer for X number of workstations and oh hey it doesn't do any kind of license check so it can literally be installed on all workstations ever and is.

Few people who can benefit from Office 2010 have it. It's decent.

Reginald · May 2012

As computers become faster, it is my job as a data architect to make sure software and queries more cumbersome to offset productivity gains.

This is to keep jobs. You're welcome!

Rolo · May 2012

Reginald wrote: »

As computers become faster, it is my job as a data architect to make sure software and queries more cumbersome to offset productivity gains.

This is to keep jobs. You're welcome!

all of our databases are excel spreadsheets

mcp · May 2012

Had an interview last week, thought it went pretty well, and it turns out it did!

They called yesterday, and want me to come in to meet the CEO and talk turkey.

The HR lady is out today, so I'll email her, and call on Monday.

Here's hopin' they don't lowball the salary.

Yukira · May 2012

Rolo wrote: »

Reginald wrote: »

As computers become faster, it is my job as a data architect to make sure software and queries more cumbersome to offset productivity gains.

This is to keep jobs. You're welcome!

all of our databases are excel spreadsheets

At my last job, the sales people had an Excel spreadsheet stored on a server share. We would get calls once a day or so with a complaint that the program would lock up.

It was Excel attempting to autosave the few gigs of data over the network.

Reginald · May 2012

Yukira wrote: »

Rolo wrote: »

Reginald wrote: »

As computers become faster, it is my job as a data architect to make sure software and queries more cumbersome to offset productivity gains.

This is to keep jobs. You're welcome!

all of our databases are excel spreadsheets

At myblast job, the sales people had an Excel spreadsheet stored on a server share. We would get calls once a day or so with a complaint that the program would lock up.

It was Excel attempting to autosave the few gigs of data over the network.

Well done to both of you. That is pretty much the pinnacle of data inaccuracy and slowness. Maybe store the data in an XML format within excel, if you need extra room to breathe.

Yukira · May 2012

The users refused to break up the one large file into smaller files.

Hunter · May 2012

I worked for a PhD Chemist that didn't realize that an excel file can have multiple worksheets. He saved each file as a single worksheet, even if he was carrying over calculations and data from one to another. The logic loops that came from his changes in one and the effects on others actually opened up a hole in space-time over the work site.

Ruckus · May 2012

Hunter wrote: »

I worked for a PhD Chemist that didn't realize that an excel file can have multiple worksheets. He saved each file as a single worksheet, even if he was carrying over calculations and data from one to another. The logic loops that came from his changes in one and the effects on others actually opened up a hole in space-time over the work site.

A little spackle should cover that right up.

Aphostile · May 2012

Soooooo who's got two thumbs and just got a second interview with a company in the bay area who controls all things ever?

This guyyyyyyy.

Janson · May 2012

Awesome!

Usagi · May 2012

Aphostile wrote: »

Soooooo who's got two thumbs and just got a second interview with a company in the bay area who controls all things ever?

This guyyyyyyy.

:^:

Abracadaniel · May 2012

nice

Aphostile · May 2012

Guess who's got two thumbs and after opening the fridge and trying to catch an errant rolling soda can dropped his pyrex container of lunch food on the ground having it shatter all over the place as soon as lunchtime rolled around?

This guyyyyyy.

DON'T EVEN CARE.