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. If you don't, he'll break your legs! Hahaha! Seriously though.
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[TRENCHES] Tuesday, May 8, 2012 - Snackula
Misery and Toil
I worked as a security officer (aka “person who watches you scan your badge and lets in the pizza guy”) for a game company during the six-month stretch prior to release of their latest game. I can tell you that everyone works hard, but the contract-work game testers would come in and work… and work… and WORK. Initially, it was a mere eight-hour day, but it rapidly progressed to watching as an endless stream of caffeine-induced jittery zombies shuffled in and out of the building, while voice actors, movie stars, and children with difficult diseases danced by like some strange sugar-plum fairy fever dream. The developers of the game itself would stroll in, casually ignore the security devices they’d demanded be installed in their own building, and blow a few grand on catering and special delivery food each week. This while delivering tirades about how the testers were making up bogus errors for them to fix. For my own part, I kept the watch, did the tallies, got the pizza and mail and put up with primadonna personalities with a smile on my face as I towered over the gibbering little venom-monkeys, wondering when one of the poor testers would crack. Naturally, I and all the other contract workers, including the testers that worked themselves to collapse, were all fired and replaced without warning after the game shipped and before the company paid a bonus to those that remained with the company. They even changed the locks on the doors.