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John Dies at the End (Coming soon to theaters!)

Big DookieBig Dookie Smells great!Houston, TXRegistered User regular
edited February 2008 in Debate and/or Discourse
"...Like getting run over by a truck made of horror, hauling two tons of stupid."

John Dies at the End, or JDatE for short, has probably been discussed to death on these forums. For those who are new to the internet, JDatE is an online novel by David Wong (not his real name), the creator and webmaster of Pointless Waste of Time. It started off as a short story that Wong wrote for Halloween a few years back, and the response was so overwhelming that he started adding to it and updating it in segments every Halloween. Eventually, it got so big that he decided to make it into a single cohesive story and make the whole thing available online for all to read. According to his records, over 50,000 people have finished the entire story, which is pretty good for such a huge online story.

The story is a horror/comedy hybrid of sorts, and succeeds where many others fail - it does both very, very well. The entire thing is both hilarious and terrifying at the same time, which is a unique sensation while reading it. The story revolves around the supernatural events in a stereotypical midwestern town, and the two slackers who unwittingly throw themselves into the middle of it all. Honestly, I won't even try to describe the plot any more than that, because it wouldn't do the book justice. Needless to say, if you have doubts, go and read the prologue and begin your journey into the insane world of JDatE. Be careful though, it's very, very long - literally a full length novel. Once you start, you won't want to stop, so don't start it until you have several hours to kill.

So why am I bringing this topic up now? Simple - John Dies at the End is now in print! You can now hold a physical, officially-published version of JDatE in your grubby little hands. The published version of the book is also slightly different from the online version, with some new plot details, corrections, and revised story. So if you've already read the book online, you can still have a fresh experience with the published novel. However, the original version of the novel will remain available online for all to enjoy as well, so there's really no excuse for you not to go read it right now!

For those who have read the book already, consider this an official discussion thread. How'd you like the book? What was your favorite part? Is John Cheese really my baby's daddy?

UPDATE (2-23-08)

The film rights for JDatE have been aquired by Don Coscarelli, writer and directer of Bubba Ho-Tep. So apparently this thing is going to become a movie sometime in the possibly near future. Pretty cool stuff.

Big Dookie on
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Posts

  • edited September 2007
    Hmmmm...sounds very interesting.

    Could I pick it up at physical bookstore, potentially? I have cash monies, but no plastic. Also, I dislike waiting for shipping if I can avoid it.

  • B:LB:L Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Amazon.com review:
    Squashua wrote:
    This book by up and coming horror/comedy writer David Wong is one of the scariest novels I've read in a very long time. It's not the sort of scary where you're actually scared while reading. Mostly you will be amused, entertained, and probably a bit surprised at parts. The real terror comes once you try to sleep the next night, and the night after, and the night after that and so forth. I haven't slept a full night in the years since I first read John Dies At The End and this is the reason the state took away my driver's license.

    :lol:

    I loved the online story, so consider this book bought. I just hope they didn't pull a Lucas with their changes.

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  • jothkijothki Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    B:L wrote: »
    Amazon.com review:
    Squashua wrote:
    This book by up and coming horror/comedy writer David Wong is one of the scariest novels I've read in a very long time. It's not the sort of scary where you're actually scared while reading. Mostly you will be amused, entertained, and probably a bit surprised at parts. The real terror comes once you try to sleep the next night, and the night after, and the night after that and so forth. I haven't slept a full night in the years since I first read John Dies At The End and this is the reason the state took away my driver's license.

    :lol:

    I loved the online story, so consider this book bought. I just hope they didn't pull a Lucas with their changes.

    One big thing is that he apparently
    Spoiler:

  • IShallRiseAgainIShallRiseAgain Registered User
    edited September 2007
    There is a sequel out too. I still haven't bothered to read it though.

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  • NeadenNeaden Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    jothki wrote: »
    B:L wrote: »
    Amazon.com review:
    Squashua wrote:
    This book by up and coming horror/comedy writer David Wong is one of the scariest novels I've read in a very long time. It's not the sort of scary where you're actually scared while reading. Mostly you will be amused, entertained, and probably a bit surprised at parts. The real terror comes once you try to sleep the next night, and the night after, and the night after that and so forth. I haven't slept a full night in the years since I first read John Dies At The End and this is the reason the state took away my driver's license.

    :lol:

    I loved the online story, so consider this book bought. I just hope they didn't pull a Lucas with their changes.

    One big thing is that he apparently
    Spoiler:
    Spoiler:

  • Big DookieBig Dookie Smells great! Houston, TXRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    There is a sequel out too. I still haven't bothered to read it though.
    In many ways, I think the sequel is superior to the original. The horror/humor ratio is a bit higher, but it's still hilarious. And he does a genuinely good job at expanding the story in a really great way. There's a "twist" near the end of it that's subtle, but mind-blowing when you realize its implications on both the first and second books.

    Also, it has a monster made up solely of impaled turkeys. How could anyone resist?

  • jothkijothki Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Neaden wrote: »
    jothki wrote: »
    B:L wrote: »
    Amazon.com review:
    Squashua wrote:
    This book by up and coming horror/comedy writer David Wong is one of the scariest novels I've read in a very long time. It's not the sort of scary where you're actually scared while reading. Mostly you will be amused, entertained, and probably a bit surprised at parts. The real terror comes once you try to sleep the next night, and the night after, and the night after that and so forth. I haven't slept a full night in the years since I first read John Dies At The End and this is the reason the state took away my driver's license.

    :lol:

    I loved the online story, so consider this book bought. I just hope they didn't pull a Lucas with their changes.

    One big thing is that he apparently
    Spoiler:
    Spoiler:
    Spoiler:

  • NeadenNeaden Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Big Dookie wrote: »
    There is a sequel out too. I still haven't bothered to read it though.
    In many ways, I think the sequel is superior to the original. The horror/humor ratio is a bit higher, but it's still hilarious. And he does a genuinely good job at expanding the story in a really great way. There's a "twist" near the end of it that's subtle, but mind-blowing when you realize its implications on both the first and second books.

    Also, it has a monster made up solely of impaled turkeys. How could anyone resist?
    You referring to
    Spoiler:

  • DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    jdate.com
    ?

    Tangent, but I'm pretty sure that's a Jewish dating service site.

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  • Big DookieBig Dookie Smells great! Houston, TXRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Neaden wrote: »
    Big Dookie wrote: »
    There is a sequel out too. I still haven't bothered to read it though.
    In many ways, I think the sequel is superior to the original. The horror/humor ratio is a bit higher, but it's still hilarious. And he does a genuinely good job at expanding the story in a really great way. There's a "twist" near the end of it that's subtle, but mind-blowing when you realize its implications on both the first and second books.

    Also, it has a monster made up solely of impaled turkeys. How could anyone resist?
    You referring to
    Spoiler:
    Yup. Because when you take that into consideration with the events of the first story, it really makes you question whether everything that happened in the first book was actually John and Dave working against them, or if they were just using her to manipulate events.

  • TehSpectreTehSpectre @PixelateJake on TwitterRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Best online novel ever.

    I am going to buy a few of these as gifts.

    Dookie, I <3 you.

    Spec_Banner.png
  • durandal4532durandal4532 Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I... kind of thought it was a really really poorly written attempt at a joke.

    That just never stopped.

  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    hmm... I don't know what it is about JDATE... for some reason I found it impossible to stop reading... but for some other reason I don't know if I would really call it good. There were some parts that just took me completely out of the story.
    Spoiler:

    But then, there were other parts that were just.... really good.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • hambonehambone Registered User
    edited September 2007
    I remember the first and middle parts were cool, but the last bits were a mess. The whole bit about fighting aliens under the mall with health power ups was pretty retarded.

    Just a bunch of intoxicated pigeons.
  • TubeTube Says some shit Administrator, ClubPA admin
    edited September 2007
    edit: note to self, we are not talking about system shock 2 in this thread

  • EinhanderEinhander __BANNED USERS
    edited September 2007
    edit: note to self, we are not talking about system shock 2 in this thread

    I was about to ridicule you mercilessly, but it looks like I don't have to now.

    I read it in two sittings. I literally could not stop reading it. I blew off a bunch of friends going to a bar one night and potentially a casual sex episode the next just so I could finish reading it.

    My problem was I couldn't read it for extremely long periods of time because my monitor would give me a headache. Obviously I'm stoked about the print version.

  • TubeTube Says some shit Administrator, ClubPA admin
    edited September 2007
    Einhander wrote: »
    edit: note to self, we are not talking about system shock 2 in this thread

    I was about to ridicule you mercilessly, but it looks like I don't have to now.

    You're not the boss of me.

  • JAEFJAEF Unstoppably Bald Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Einhander wrote: »
    edit: note to self, we are not talking about system shock 2 in this thread

    I was about to ridicule you mercilessly, but it looks like I don't have to now.

    You're not the boss of me.
    I guess the jdate.com setup of the two of you didn't really work out that well? It throws off the system when you're not actually Jewish, Tube.

    Note to self: Read this. I've sort of run into a book brick wall and I'm trying to find something to dig into. Since this is free what the hell.

    Battle.net ID: Jaef#1126 -- Steam: Jaef -- PSN: Jaef -- League of Legends: Jaef
  • TehSpectreTehSpectre @PixelateJake on TwitterRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    If you like comedy+horror it is a good read.

    Also, a pretty decent twist.

    Spec_Banner.png
  • Big DookieBig Dookie Smells great! Houston, TXRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Sentry wrote: »
    hmm... I don't know what it is about JDATE... for some reason I found it impossible to stop reading... but for some other reason I don't know if I would really call it good. There were some parts that just took me completely out of the story.
    Spoiler:

    But then, there were other parts that were just.... really good.
    Yeah, some parts of the story definitely seemed disconnected and not very good. Part of this is the way it was written though. Each "section" of the book was written seperately from each other, with no intention of ever combining them together. When he did combine them into a full story, he had to write a completely new section (Arnie) that tied the stories together. It works for the most part, but there are things that don't really fit in well.

    This is a big reason I think for why he made so many changes in the print version. He wanted it to be more cohesive and cut out some of the stuff he didn't think really fit in. I'm fine with it, since it could make for a better read - plus, you can still read the original version online, so no worries. Like I said earlier though, the sequel is much better in this regard, because he wrote it as one continuous story. The difference really shows in the quality of the sequel.

    Edit - Although, that part you spoilered has one of my favorite lines in the whole book:
    Spoiler:

    I busted out laughing at that point, because up until then I didn't really see where it was going. Then when I saw that line, I realized the entire section was a spoof of FPS games. I'm glad he left it out of the print version, because a more mainstream audience might not get the joke, but it's still pretty funny.

  • BlackjackBlackjack Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I'm reading this now and find myself unable to stop. Only on page 17/chapter 7 right now, and I've found it more funny than creepy/scary. So far the only part that creeped me out was when
    Spoiler:

    I'm really enjoying it so far, though.

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  • edited September 2007
    So, no one's told me if I can pick it up at a physical bookstore or not. If I can, I might just go get it tomorrow.

  • Big DookieBig Dookie Smells great! Houston, TXRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    suilimeA wrote: »
    So, no one's told me if I can pick it up at a physical bookstore or not. If I can, I might just go get it tomorrow.
    I doubt most bookstores will stock it unless someone who works there knows about it and orders it for the store. So most likely, no. However, you can ask the store to order it for you, and you can request that they stock it.

  • Big DookieBig Dookie Smells great! Houston, TXRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Sorry to bump my own thread, but this might be important for people reading it online. Apparently the author decided to revamp the online version to match the print version, and he's updated it in sections. So large chunks of it, as well as the sequel, will be offline for a few weeks probably. Just thought you guys reading through it might want to know.

    On another note, the publisher posted apparently posted a Book Trailer on YouTube.

  • jothkijothki Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Big Dookie wrote: »
    Sorry to bump my own thread, but this might be important for people reading it online. Apparently the author decided to revamp the online version to match the print version, and he's updated it in sections. So large chunks of it, as well as the sequel, will be offline for a few weeks probably. Just thought you guys reading through it might want to know.

    On another note, the publisher posted apparently posted a Book Trailer on YouTube.

    Oh god now he's going to claim that he lost the original version, and the only thing he has left of it are images of photocopied printouts.

  • Don PedroDon Pedro Registered User
    edited September 2007
    I think the third installment is supposed to come out this Halloween, no?

  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I was wondering why I couldn't access the sequel and then realized it was the same with some of the chapters of the first one, good thing I finished it before it started though. Will still try and see if I can buy the book though.

    NNID: Sabuiy
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  • gtrmpgtrmp Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    jothki wrote: »
    Big Dookie wrote: »
    Sorry to bump my own thread, but this might be important for people reading it online. Apparently the author decided to revamp the online version to match the print version, and he's updated it in sections. So large chunks of it, as well as the sequel, will be offline for a few weeks probably. Just thought you guys reading through it might want to know.

    Oh god now he's going to claim that he lost the original version, and the only thing he has left of it are images of photocopied printouts.
    Now I have this odd mental image of George Lucas as a Something Awful forum goon.

  • Nova_CNova_C Social Justice Haruspex Beyond The WallRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Man, I read JDatE a while ago and was completely shocked at it's quality. It manages to blend an expertly written suspense with the largest concentration of dick jokes in any medium. Also, the reviews are awesome.

    "I clicked and didn't move for hours. The next day I woke up retarded."
    Spoiler:

    My blog: www.jonathanirons.net
    My Twitter: IronBorealis
    Be advised, I'm not the best at keeping either updated. >.>
  • SentrySentry Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Nova_C wrote: »
    Man, I read JDatE a while ago and was completely shocked at it's quality. It manages to blend an expertly written suspense with the largest concentration of dick jokes in any medium. Also, the reviews are awesome.

    "I clicked and didn't move for hours. The next day I woke up retarded."
    Spoiler:

    As I said before, that part (for me anyway), just didn't mesh at all with the rest of the story. It was like, meta-comedy that just didn't fit within the context. If he had meshed it better, or somehow found a way to integrate it into the overall story, I probably would have loved it. But the way it was written, it was just jarring and disjointed.

    In other words, I loved the idea of it, but the application left something to be desired.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    wrote:
    When I was a little kid, I always pretended I was the hero,' Skip said.
    'Fuck yeah, me too. What little kid ever pretended to be part of the lynch-mob?'
  • MalkorMalkor Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Is there like, a mirror to the parts he's editing? I just started it.

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  • SamSam Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    So David Wong isn't that dude's real name? What is?

  • Big DookieBig Dookie Smells great! Houston, TXRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Malkor wrote: »
    Is there like, a mirror to the parts he's editing? I just started it.
    Here's an archived version of the site before he relaunched. The main link doesn't work, but you can go to the story directly through the index at the bottom of the page. That link works for now, but I don't know for how long. So read as much as you can.

  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    So in stores, is the book going to say the author is David Wong, or is he going to use his real name?

    Edit: Found it on amazon, has David Wong as the writer. I don't think I would be able to buy it in stores since indigo.ca doesn't have it on it's website and almost most bookstores around here are associated with indigo.

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  • MalkorMalkor Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Big Dookie wrote: »
    Malkor wrote: »
    Is there like, a mirror to the parts he's editing? I just started it.
    Here's an archived version of the site before he relaunched. The main link doesn't work, but you can go to the story directly through the index at the bottom of the page. That link works for now, but I don't know for how long. So read as much as you can.
    I threw money at the problem and a book should be arriving eventually. Thanks though, this should help time go by.

    14271f3c-c765-4e74-92b1-49d7612675f2.jpg
  • FalxFalx Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    man it figures he'd start doing that JUST when I start the sequel.

    Hisao? What's the word for when it feels in your heart that everything in the world is alright?
    .

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  • GlyphGlyph Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Sam wrote: »
    So David Wong isn't that dude's real name? What is?

    No one knows. But the forums he runs is among the most elitist in existence.

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  • JAEFJAEF Unstoppably Bald Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Motherfucker I was 3/4 through when this revamp crap took it all down. Gaahhh.

    Battle.net ID: Jaef#1126 -- Steam: Jaef -- PSN: Jaef -- League of Legends: Jaef
  • Nexus ZeroNexus Zero Registered User
    edited September 2007
    Randomly picked out page 24 and started reading. And now I don't think I can stop...

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