Cliche? Very. But I need to put into words...somewhere, what has my head spinning and me throwing up every hour or so.
I just learned that my girlfriend of a year has been involved in a relationship with another man since July.
We're long distance and she took a summer job at a bar/restaurant. They met there. Sounds like it started not too long after they met.
I was suspicious (I had seen texts, myspace *ugh* and things).
Asked if there was something I should know...made reference to him directly.
She calmed me down and said no...that there was nothing.
About 3 weeks ago she was down with me and there were more texts and voicemails. Again, I saw some. He wrote, "I miss your touch." along with some other things.
Again...I questioned her..and she denied. Told me he was becoming obsessive..almsot stalkerish.
This is the same week that I told her, for the first time, that I love her. I don't use the word lightly and she knows that. She said it back..there were tears and such. Now, thinking about it, I don't know if the tears were because of guilt or just happiness.
I went to ireland and I got emails from her that were the sweetest thing I could imagine, and a handmade card that brought me to tears when I got back.
He...had a new blog posts up. Making me question things...making me wonder. I asked and she said that she recieved flowers from him while I was away and that she promptly threw them away.
There was talk of breaking off all contact with him and things like that. She told me she would and that it was fine, I shouldn't worry. That she was going to the manager and GM at her work...
Apparently she did break it off with him and the dude is a wreck...enough so that his friends are seeking revenge against this girl. They sent me video proof of them together. There was hugging...and kissing. Speaking with the friends, there was also more.
Girl doesn't know that I know all this yet, and I'm going to see her this friday (I was supposed to be meeting a bunch of family and such).
Do I forgive? Can I? Do I just walk away? Can I trust anything?