TexiKenDammit!That fish really got me!Registered Userregular
Pitch Perfect, what a frustrating experience. It's got some really good things going for it, and then some really dumb, bad things that happen like a second later. It's one of those movies that's trying to deconstruct and satirize these kinds of aimed at teen girl movies yet at the same time wants to get away with the same generic things and that is what makes it fall into that average pool. Imagine if you will someone jumping out a collapsing building, hand stretched, trying to grab hold of those in the helicopter (these people are Bring It On and 10 Things I Hate About You and Clueless but stay with me, symbolism), and yes!, they grab hold, but then these other people jump out of the building too, who are like, marketing and producers and focus group people, and grab onto that person and drag her down into the rubble below. Hands slip, screams are had, Sylvester Stallone Cliffhanger. Yeah, I think I nailed that confusing comparison about a 100%.
I've never watched Glee, never cared to, but this movie should have poked fun at the uber competitiveness a bit more. John Michael Higgins and Elizabeth Banks were the best part of the movie (Minstrel Cycles is Grade A quality punnage right there), but everything occurs from a safe little cocoon that of course the uptight, traditional looking blonde Stepford Wives girl wants to stick to her ways, but Anna Kendrick, who has three tattoos and racoon eyes because of makeup, because she's a free spirit, see, she's going to make things super kewl with her music mixing skillz because all she cares about is music and also has no character flaws because she's a DJ!
It's not a bad cast movie either, despite everyone looking 25 when they should be early college. The main four girls are really good (and I know there has to be a lesbian makeout scene of Anna Kendrick and Brittney Snow in the shower somewhere, maybe on the Blu-Ray), Higgins and Banks are great as well, but Not Dane Cook was terrible and I haven't seen less chemistry onscreen between two romantic leads since Corky Romano. The entire boys team really were just all punch in the face worthy, even, I hate to say, Adam from Workaholics. And then you have some bad, forced comic relief in the form of washed up old acapellas who exist for no reason other than to laugh at because they're old, it was a-ca-stupid (I did love everything being a-ca-something). The music stuff just didn't mean anything to me, especially that acapalla street battle scene, and I really thought it was stupid to use a Lilly Allen song made popular by it's use of fuck and then replace it with f you very much when you could have just used a different song instead, and I thought I would never hear Party In the USA ever again after the Vancouver Olympics but here it came!
One thing I really started to notice, however, is how dirty and offensive some of the writing was. I was totally fine with it, because that's what humor should be allowed to be and just because you make a joke doesn't mean it's being mean to someone or some group, but I swear if this material was in a Rogen comedy or on Family Guy it would be seen as punching down or something that would draw ire from the same people/critics who probably praised it here. This is nothing against the film, more the response of this film by the same people who would shit on the other sort of movies out there. Fat Amy getting "shot" was funny and the scene rolled well into leading into the next part, as was acting like having Nodes was as serious as cancer, yet if say the same thing happened in Pineapple Express 2 it would be fat shaming and blah bluh blah. Same with the use of vomit. It works, but were it used the same way in another movie it would be called gross and juvenile.
So, I don't know. There was good stuff here, probably a bit too much pandering to the Glee people, and I can see where it can improve and move on from some predictable notes and humor, yet I have a feeling the sequel goes in another, safer direction. It's a movie worth watching, but there were so many times where I just looked at my phone or kept saying to the screen to "move on, you aren't funny or charming, Not Dane Cook!"
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TexiKenDammit!That fish really got me!Registered Userregular
And a sidenote from Pitch Perfect, Breakfast Club is still a great movie, they should have honored it by making PP rated R.
Edward seriously I worry about you, can't you just self hate by watching cleveland sports? I mean isn't the immenent loss of the cavs to the hawks enough pain?
I would like some money because these are artisanal nuggets of wisdom philistine.
Edward seriously I worry about you, can't you just self hate by watching cleveland sports? I mean isn't the immenent loss of the cavs to the hawks enough pain?
TexiKenDammit!That fish really got me!Registered Userregular
He could watch Fun Size, that's a movie that takes place in Cleveland that mostly works with a surprising amount of heart you wouldn't expect given the premise.
Pitch Perfect was pretty blatantly someone saying "HEY LET US REMAKE BRING IT ON, BUT MORE LIKE THAT GLEE SHOW EVERYONE IS INTO," and pretty much succeeding.
C'mon, it gave us barf angels. Show some respect.
I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
So hey, there exists a movie called Zombeavers. It is exactly what it sounds like. It is the B-est of B-movies, with the lowest of low budgets, but it more or less works by just running with its stupid-as-balls premise and having goofy fun with it.
It is probably the best zombie beaver movie that will ever be made. It is also very short. It even subverts a trope or two! (NOTE: It does not subvert the trope of having gratuitous titties. That trope is definitely there.)
If any of this makes you at all inclined to give it a shot, you'll probably enjoy yourself well enough. If this sounds so goddamn stupid that you can't even, maybe steer clear.
I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
Haha I watched it, was surprisingly good for silly fun. My favourite line was probably "Guys we can't turn on each other that's what the Beavers would want!"
Pitch Perfect, what a frustrating experience. It's got some really good things going for it, and then some really dumb, bad things that happen like a second later. It's one of those movies that's trying to deconstruct and satirize these kinds of aimed at teen girl movies yet at the same time wants to get away with the same generic things and that is what makes it fall into that average pool. Imagine if you will someone jumping out a collapsing building, hand stretched, trying to grab hold of those in the helicopter (these people are Bring It On and 10 Things I Hate About You and Clueless but stay with me, symbolism), and yes!, they grab hold, but then these other people jump out of the building too, who are like, marketing and producers and focus group people, and grab onto that person and drag her down into the rubble below. Hands slip, screams are had, Sylvester Stallone Cliffhanger. Yeah, I think I nailed that confusing comparison about a 100%.
I've never watched Glee, never cared to, but this movie should have poked fun at the uber competitiveness a bit more. John Michael Higgins and Elizabeth Banks were the best part of the movie (Minstrel Cycles is Grade A quality punnage right there), but everything occurs from a safe little cocoon that of course the uptight, traditional looking blonde Stepford Wives girl wants to stick to her ways, but Anna Kendrick, who has three tattoos and racoon eyes because of makeup, because she's a free spirit, see, she's going to make things super kewl with her music mixing skillz because all she cares about is music and also has no character flaws because she's a DJ!
It's not a bad cast movie either, despite everyone looking 25 when they should be early college. The main four girls are really good (and I know there has to be a lesbian makeout scene of Anna Kendrick and Brittney Snow in the shower somewhere, maybe on the Blu-Ray), Higgins and Banks are great as well, but Not Dane Cook was terrible and I haven't seen less chemistry onscreen between two romantic leads since Corky Romano. The entire boys team really were just all punch in the face worthy, even, I hate to say, Adam from Workaholics. And then you have some bad, forced comic relief in the form of washed up old acapellas who exist for no reason other than to laugh at because they're old, it was a-ca-stupid (I did love everything being a-ca-something). The music stuff just didn't mean anything to me, especially that acapalla street battle scene, and I really thought it was stupid to use a Lilly Allen song made popular by it's use of fuck and then replace it with f you very much when you could have just used a different song instead, and I thought I would never hear Party In the USA ever again after the Vancouver Olympics but here it came!
One thing I really started to notice, however, is how dirty and offensive some of the writing was. I was totally fine with it, because that's what humor should be allowed to be and just because you make a joke doesn't mean it's being mean to someone or some group, but I swear if this material was in a Rogen comedy or on Family Guy it would be seen as punching down or something that would draw ire from the same people/critics who probably praised it here. This is nothing against the film, more the response of this film by the same people who would shit on the other sort of movies out there. Fat Amy getting "shot" was funny and the scene rolled well into leading into the next part, as was acting like having Nodes was as serious as cancer, yet if say the same thing happened in Pineapple Express 2 it would be fat shaming and blah bluh blah. Same with the use of vomit. It works, but were it used the same way in another movie it would be called gross and juvenile.
So, I don't know. There was good stuff here, probably a bit too much pandering to the Glee people, and I can see where it can improve and move on from some predictable notes and humor, yet I have a feeling the sequel goes in another, safer direction. It's a movie worth watching, but there were so many times where I just looked at my phone or kept saying to the screen to "move on, you aren't funny or charming, Not Dane Cook!"
In Pitch Perfect 2, all of these issues are actually made worse. The plot is stretched thin with too much going on, and a lot of the jokes seem lazily written. I don't think Kay Cannon gets enough flack for it but I think her writing is on par with or worse than Seth McFarlane's... probably worse. If his name were on it, I think there'd be a Mary Sue article on how cheap and offensive it is. Especially the way the gay character is handled.
The jokes get all the obvious laughs and are a step up from something like a CBS comedy, but they're still pretty shallow. I don't think either are bad at all though (early seasons of Glee weren't either, for that matter), but I think 2 should've had more fine tuning.
For what it's worth, I thought a Glee S1 was amazing, and I loved Pitch Perfect.
Also, Night of the Lepus sounds like it should be hilaribad, but it's mostly just boring. The few actual bunny attacks are kinda funny, but I hesitate to recommend it as even ironic entertainment.
Oh, one more thing about Zombeavers - both the opening credits and end credits song are pretty great.
I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
just got back from MMFuryRoad. it was...ok? I can really appreciate the technical skill in making this movie but i just wasn't engaged. part of me wanted to laugh and part of me wanted to feel the tension but those feelings just kept getting mixed by awesome guitar riffs. If i was flipping the channels i'm not sure i'd stop and watch it again...it was very close to being boring.
One in Five people are broken and can not enjoy awesome. I'm sorry Pailyder I hear they are working on a patch.
i really am broken but at the same time...going into the movie and having read the hype around it i expected to be on the edge of my seat the whole time and i wasn't. the cut to black transitions were awkward and like i said the transition from silliness to surreal or intense just didn't click with me. like the part
where they are talking about the green place and how they passed it on the way to the desert and it was where the crows were...that should have been some deep intense feeling moment and i watched furiosa fall down and cry and i was just like...that's it?
just got back from MMFuryRoad. it was...ok? I can really appreciate the technical skill in making this movie but i just wasn't engaged. part of me wanted to laugh and part of me wanted to feel the tension but those feelings just kept getting mixed by awesome guitar riffs. If i was flipping the channels i'm not sure i'd stop and watch it again...it was very close to being boring.
One in Five people are broken and can not enjoy awesome. I'm sorry Pailyder I hear they are working on a patch.
i really am broken but at the same time...going into the movie and having read the hype around it i expected to be on the edge of my seat the whole time and i wasn't. the cut to black transitions were awkward and like i said the transition from silliness to surreal or intense just didn't click with me. like the part
where they are talking about the green place and how they passed it on the way to the desert and it was where the crows were...that should have been some deep intense feeling moment and i watched furiosa fall down and cry and i was just like...that's it?
well at least you found out you don't like movies, you're gonna save a ton of money now.
reVerseAttack and Dethrone GodRegistered Userregular
"That's Sue Storm, her power is invisibility."
*creates a big fuck you force explosion*
Oh yeah, invisibility. That's her main power.
+6
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TexiKenDammit!That fish really got me!Registered Userregular
Tomorrowland, aka Small Wonder Terminator 2 National Treasure, another frustrating experience. It's ambitious, but not totally rubbish, just very meh. It is very much like Godzilla in that the trailers sell you a hella different movie than what you get. But it's not as bad as what Godzilla was, yet you're left seeing what Bird wanted to do while being forced to carry a bunch of other weird Lindelhof and Studio mandates.
Let's squash the objectivist qualm first. It's not. It's more trying to shoehorn in a chosen one story into a fight against the inevitable dystopia where the hope of youth energizes the now lost prior torch bearer. It's not Randian so much as Tolkein-ien. If Clooney is anything he's a Tony Stark who gave up, and the story is much more pragmatist until the very ridiculous third act. Hell, even Robin Williams in Hook is a better analogue than anything objectivist. So shame on critics trying to get cool guy twitter snark points to hammer that theme when it doesn't exist.
So let's start there. The story is told via a flashback basically that already removes any lingering sense of tension, which was a bad decision. Because the first 15 minutes are the best part of the movie, and clearly what Bird wanted to do in his accustomed stylized 60's yet modern era storytelling we've seen before in his work. It's when we see Tomorrowland in 1964, as a kid Clooney gumptions his way into this world of possibility with his homemade jetpack. And the special effects and look of the city is great, you really get this sense that you're in for a ride.
But then we fast forward 50 years and we're stuck with a girl who is a genius but not really a rebel, just a hopeful girl doing sabotage of the dismantling of the NASA shuttle launchpad because we're stupid and not doing much space stuff anymore. This is where she gets arrested and receives her Tomorrowland token, given to her by a mysterious girl who also gave Clooney his token decades earlier. From there it's robot fights, the hopeful kid meeting the grumpy old guy, the girl showing up again, and essentially a fetch quest for the first hour that never materializes into what the movie seemed to promise.
God, I don't want to spoil it, and I'm not, but I feel the need to point out there is very little Tomorrowland in this movie, which is over 2 hours and should have had 30 minutes chopped off easily. What you see in the trailers and the first scene of the movie is about it (and boy did they change the trailers to bait and switch certain things, just like Godzilla). And it's such a shame. Because the reason for all the negative vibes in the world is explained here which makes no sense, is a complete cop out, and just isn't replaced with anything worthwhile other than a stupid story about two wolves that a 13 year old who just read the Communist Manifesto and listened to Dark Side of the Moon for the first time would say "oh knock it off, dude."
Of the four main leads, Clooney, House, and the young girl who plays Athena are really good (especially Athena, she might be an upcoming breakout actress). The girl who plays the plucky young rebel optimist never lands as either optimistic or as witty enough and it's a shame the movie centers around her and not Clooney (or Athena). And man does she wear all the markings of a Poochie, designed by Disney Committee and Lindelhof trying to make her seem smarter than she is. Female, smart but never shown just told to us, a somewhat loner who drapes nostalgia around her as a security blanket and nothing is ever her fault.
This is also a movie that, for a Disney film, kills a lot of people onscreen. More people die here than in Avengers 2, that's not an exaggeration. Yet it also shows kids gets being beat up and violence in a very natural fashion that is very refreshing. I know that might make you tilt your head a bit but it treats violence like an 80's movie would involving kids, like a Goonies. It's there, it's not glorified, and when a robot is attacking you they aren't going to be nicer to the kid, they are going to use their advantage to end the fight quicker. And it shows the effects of what being in an explosion would really do to you, you will have tissues in your nose to stop the bleeding for a while.
The third act falls apart completely and is a total cop out in trying to have a message to wake the world up from accepting mediocrity, so much so the power literally went off right before the big final fight action piece, which made a lot of people just leave the theater and not come back. And the very end feels like studio forced ending that flat out sucks, and is the movie equivalent of soft bigotry of low expectations.
So Tomorrowland was basically a place for all the smart people before, the dreamers and such who actually made things. Inventors, engineers, basic smart people.
But now, under the new, non dystopia version, it's for every dreamer. So stupid guitar player on the street, he's like, an artist, man, so he's chosen to come to this world now. And so is the lady who plants a tree in the inner city. And a lady who basically works a GM plant who seems like a normal assembly line lady. And an airplane pilot (which makes the whole disappear thing totally not cool in that particular instance). The message they try to imply is that any dreamer is now welcomed into Tomorrowland, but in doing so it's exactly what Papa Incredible said, when everyone is special no one is. I know I'm dropping some cynicism on it that I shouldn't but it's a very insincere Coke Commercial attempt to show we're all special that completely goes against what Bird was trying to do in the beginning. Which is why it totally doesn't feel like he had a say in it.
It's an average movie, with a lot of cool things, and some really neat designs and set pieces. But not much humor (what little there is is forced), not much story, and just not enough here to pay and see for two hours. Wait for Netflix.
Watched the new Michael Bay Ninja Turtles on Netflix last night. Overall a decent enough film that's enjoyable. The writing is mediocre, but everything else works well enough.
Definitely worth the time it takes to watch it, but I wouldn't necessarily recommend spending more than your Netflix subscription on it.
Watched the new Michael Bay Ninja Turtles on Netflix last night. Overall a decent enough film that's enjoyable. The writing is mediocre, but everything else works well enough.
Definitely worth the time it takes to watch it, but I wouldn't necessarily recommend spending more than your Netflix subscription on it.
i saw in the cinema on a whim because i'd seen everything else out that week and i can tell you it is definitely not worth the time it takes to watch it. at all.
i dont regret many things, but i do regret my money getting added to bay box office that day.
Deaderinred on
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Captain Marcusnow arrives the hour of actionRegistered Userregular
Like you said, the first part at the World's Fair is amazing.
They really could have gone in a better direction with
the concept of Tomorrowland kicking people out and then falling into decay. It really reminded me of Rapture, what with the ideal society of the best and brightest going to shit. But nope! They only kicked the one guy out. The part about the glorious vision of the trailer actually being a commercial was a nice twist.
"That's Sue Storm, her power is invisibility."
*creates a big fuck you force explosion*
Oh yeah, invisibility. That's her main power.
Well, better than Sue Storm from the first F4, where her main superpower was becoming visible and naked at awkward times!
That would have been an awesome power. If only we had gotten that instead of...I'm sure she did something in those movies...whatever that was.
She got caught in the buff a few times.
I mean, it was Jessica Alba, so it wasn't like I was complaining too much...
Wait, it was Jessica Alba. She managed to make being a stripper in Sin City mundane and boring. Her "caught in the nude" bits in F4 were eyeroll-worthy.
"That's Sue Storm, her power is invisibility."
*creates a big fuck you force explosion*
Oh yeah, invisibility. That's her main power.
Well, better than Sue Storm from the first F4, where her main superpower was becoming visible and naked at awkward times!
That would have been an awesome power. If only we had gotten that instead of...I'm sure she did something in those movies...whatever that was.
She got caught in the buff a few times.
I mean, it was Jessica Alba, so it wasn't like I was complaining too much...
That always seemed so stupid to me. It's Jessica Alba, and a PG-13 comic book movie, they aren't going to show her naked so why write so many "almost naked" sequences? It would've made more sense and been more in character to have Johnny keep winding up in the buff anyway and it's Chris Evans so you can show a hell of a lot more And keep your precious PG13.
"That's Sue Storm, her power is invisibility."
*creates a big fuck you force explosion*
Oh yeah, invisibility. That's her main power.
Well, better than Sue Storm from the first F4, where her main superpower was becoming visible and naked at awkward times!
That would have been an awesome power. If only we had gotten that instead of...I'm sure she did something in those movies...whatever that was.
She got caught in the buff a few times.
I mean, it was Jessica Alba, so it wasn't like I was complaining too much...
That always seemed so stupid to me. It's Jessica Alba, and a PG-13 comic book movie, they aren't going to show her naked so why write so many "almost naked" sequences? It would've made more sense and been more in character to have Johnny keep winding up in the buff anyway and it's Chris Evans so you can show a hell of a lot more And keep your precious PG13.
And with him you could always have , ah, strategically placed fireball.
"That's Sue Storm, her power is invisibility."
*creates a big fuck you force explosion*
Oh yeah, invisibility. That's her main power.
Well, better than Sue Storm from the first F4, where her main superpower was becoming visible and naked at awkward times!
That would have been an awesome power. If only we had gotten that instead of...I'm sure she did something in those movies...whatever that was.
She got caught in the buff a few times.
I mean, it was Jessica Alba, so it wasn't like I was complaining too much...
That always seemed so stupid to me. It's Jessica Alba, and a PG-13 comic book movie, they aren't going to show her naked so why write so many "almost naked" sequences? It would've made more sense and been more in character to have Johnny keep winding up in the buff anyway and it's Chris Evans so you can show a hell of a lot more And keep your precious PG13.
And with him you could always have , ah, strategically placed fireball.
I always go to the doctor immediately when I have strategically placed fireballs.
remember when silver surfer turned up and galactus was a giant cloud? Fun times.
That movie managed to make Ultimate Galactus boring.
+1
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reVerseAttack and Dethrone GodRegistered Userregular
I have never seen Jessica Alba in anything good.
The Eye made me wonder if I would enjoy the movie more if I were blind, which is not a good thing when all you've got going on are the looks of your main star.
Posts
I've never watched Glee, never cared to, but this movie should have poked fun at the uber competitiveness a bit more. John Michael Higgins and Elizabeth Banks were the best part of the movie (Minstrel Cycles is Grade A quality punnage right there), but everything occurs from a safe little cocoon that of course the uptight, traditional looking blonde Stepford Wives girl wants to stick to her ways, but Anna Kendrick, who has three tattoos and racoon eyes because of makeup, because she's a free spirit, see, she's going to make things super kewl with her music mixing skillz because all she cares about is music and also has no character flaws because she's a DJ!
It's not a bad cast movie either, despite everyone looking 25 when they should be early college. The main four girls are really good (and I know there has to be a lesbian makeout scene of Anna Kendrick and Brittney Snow in the shower somewhere, maybe on the Blu-Ray), Higgins and Banks are great as well, but Not Dane Cook was terrible and I haven't seen less chemistry onscreen between two romantic leads since Corky Romano. The entire boys team really were just all punch in the face worthy, even, I hate to say, Adam from Workaholics. And then you have some bad, forced comic relief in the form of washed up old acapellas who exist for no reason other than to laugh at because they're old, it was a-ca-stupid (I did love everything being a-ca-something). The music stuff just didn't mean anything to me, especially that acapalla street battle scene, and I really thought it was stupid to use a Lilly Allen song made popular by it's use of fuck and then replace it with f you very much when you could have just used a different song instead, and I thought I would never hear Party In the USA ever again after the Vancouver Olympics but here it came!
One thing I really started to notice, however, is how dirty and offensive some of the writing was. I was totally fine with it, because that's what humor should be allowed to be and just because you make a joke doesn't mean it's being mean to someone or some group, but I swear if this material was in a Rogen comedy or on Family Guy it would be seen as punching down or something that would draw ire from the same people/critics who probably praised it here. This is nothing against the film, more the response of this film by the same people who would shit on the other sort of movies out there. Fat Amy getting "shot" was funny and the scene rolled well into leading into the next part, as was acting like having Nodes was as serious as cancer, yet if say the same thing happened in Pineapple Express 2 it would be fat shaming and blah bluh blah. Same with the use of vomit. It works, but were it used the same way in another movie it would be called gross and juvenile.
So, I don't know. There was good stuff here, probably a bit too much pandering to the Glee people, and I can see where it can improve and move on from some predictable notes and humor, yet I have a feeling the sequel goes in another, safer direction. It's a movie worth watching, but there were so many times where I just looked at my phone or kept saying to the screen to "move on, you aren't funny or charming, Not Dane Cook!"
1. The Lazarus Effect
2. Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
3. The Voices
One was actually a good movie. But all of them really defy simple explanation.
pleasepaypreacher.net
I'M WATCHING THE CAVS RIGHT NOW
pleasepaypreacher.net
twitch.tv/Taramoor
@TaramoorPlays
Taramoor on Youtube
CAVS WON!
TWO IN A ROW
WHOOO!
C'mon, it gave us barf angels. Show some respect.
It is probably the best zombie beaver movie that will ever be made. It is also very short. It even subverts a trope or two! (NOTE: It does not subvert the trope of having gratuitous titties. That trope is definitely there.)
If any of this makes you at all inclined to give it a shot, you'll probably enjoy yourself well enough. If this sounds so goddamn stupid that you can't even, maybe steer clear.
Also one of these days I really wanna watch Night of the Lepus.
More bat-wing?
MWO: Adamski
In Pitch Perfect 2, all of these issues are actually made worse. The plot is stretched thin with too much going on, and a lot of the jokes seem lazily written. I don't think Kay Cannon gets enough flack for it but I think her writing is on par with or worse than Seth McFarlane's... probably worse. If his name were on it, I think there'd be a Mary Sue article on how cheap and offensive it is. Especially the way the gay character is handled.
The jokes get all the obvious laughs and are a step up from something like a CBS comedy, but they're still pretty shallow. I don't think either are bad at all though (early seasons of Glee weren't either, for that matter), but I think 2 should've had more fine tuning.
Also, Night of the Lepus sounds like it should be hilaribad, but it's mostly just boring. The few actual bunny attacks are kinda funny, but I hesitate to recommend it as even ironic entertainment.
Oh, one more thing about Zombeavers - both the opening credits and end credits song are pretty great.
The topless scene in Cabin in the Woods, maybe?
i really am broken but at the same time...going into the movie and having read the hype around it i expected to be on the edge of my seat the whole time and i wasn't. the cut to black transitions were awkward and like i said the transition from silliness to surreal or intense just didn't click with me. like the part
Blizzard: Pailryder#1101
GoG: https://www.gog.com/u/pailryder
well at least you found out you don't like movies, you're gonna save a ton of money now.
*creates a big fuck you force explosion*
Oh yeah, invisibility. That's her main power.
Let's squash the objectivist qualm first. It's not. It's more trying to shoehorn in a chosen one story into a fight against the inevitable dystopia where the hope of youth energizes the now lost prior torch bearer. It's not Randian so much as Tolkein-ien. If Clooney is anything he's a Tony Stark who gave up, and the story is much more pragmatist until the very ridiculous third act. Hell, even Robin Williams in Hook is a better analogue than anything objectivist. So shame on critics trying to get cool guy twitter snark points to hammer that theme when it doesn't exist.
So let's start there. The story is told via a flashback basically that already removes any lingering sense of tension, which was a bad decision. Because the first 15 minutes are the best part of the movie, and clearly what Bird wanted to do in his accustomed stylized 60's yet modern era storytelling we've seen before in his work. It's when we see Tomorrowland in 1964, as a kid Clooney gumptions his way into this world of possibility with his homemade jetpack. And the special effects and look of the city is great, you really get this sense that you're in for a ride.
But then we fast forward 50 years and we're stuck with a girl who is a genius but not really a rebel, just a hopeful girl doing sabotage of the dismantling of the NASA shuttle launchpad because we're stupid and not doing much space stuff anymore. This is where she gets arrested and receives her Tomorrowland token, given to her by a mysterious girl who also gave Clooney his token decades earlier. From there it's robot fights, the hopeful kid meeting the grumpy old guy, the girl showing up again, and essentially a fetch quest for the first hour that never materializes into what the movie seemed to promise.
God, I don't want to spoil it, and I'm not, but I feel the need to point out there is very little Tomorrowland in this movie, which is over 2 hours and should have had 30 minutes chopped off easily. What you see in the trailers and the first scene of the movie is about it (and boy did they change the trailers to bait and switch certain things, just like Godzilla). And it's such a shame. Because the reason for all the negative vibes in the world is explained here which makes no sense, is a complete cop out, and just isn't replaced with anything worthwhile other than a stupid story about two wolves that a 13 year old who just read the Communist Manifesto and listened to Dark Side of the Moon for the first time would say "oh knock it off, dude."
Of the four main leads, Clooney, House, and the young girl who plays Athena are really good (especially Athena, she might be an upcoming breakout actress). The girl who plays the plucky young rebel optimist never lands as either optimistic or as witty enough and it's a shame the movie centers around her and not Clooney (or Athena). And man does she wear all the markings of a Poochie, designed by Disney Committee and Lindelhof trying to make her seem smarter than she is. Female, smart but never shown just told to us, a somewhat loner who drapes nostalgia around her as a security blanket and nothing is ever her fault.
This is also a movie that, for a Disney film, kills a lot of people onscreen. More people die here than in Avengers 2, that's not an exaggeration. Yet it also shows kids gets being beat up and violence in a very natural fashion that is very refreshing. I know that might make you tilt your head a bit but it treats violence like an 80's movie would involving kids, like a Goonies. It's there, it's not glorified, and when a robot is attacking you they aren't going to be nicer to the kid, they are going to use their advantage to end the fight quicker. And it shows the effects of what being in an explosion would really do to you, you will have tissues in your nose to stop the bleeding for a while.
The third act falls apart completely and is a total cop out in trying to have a message to wake the world up from accepting mediocrity, so much so the power literally went off right before the big final fight action piece, which made a lot of people just leave the theater and not come back. And the very end feels like studio forced ending that flat out sucks, and is the movie equivalent of soft bigotry of low expectations.
But now, under the new, non dystopia version, it's for every dreamer. So stupid guitar player on the street, he's like, an artist, man, so he's chosen to come to this world now. And so is the lady who plants a tree in the inner city. And a lady who basically works a GM plant who seems like a normal assembly line lady. And an airplane pilot (which makes the whole disappear thing totally not cool in that particular instance). The message they try to imply is that any dreamer is now welcomed into Tomorrowland, but in doing so it's exactly what Papa Incredible said, when everyone is special no one is. I know I'm dropping some cynicism on it that I shouldn't but it's a very insincere Coke Commercial attempt to show we're all special that completely goes against what Bird was trying to do in the beginning. Which is why it totally doesn't feel like he had a say in it.
It's an average movie, with a lot of cool things, and some really neat designs and set pieces. But not much humor (what little there is is forced), not much story, and just not enough here to pay and see for two hours. Wait for Netflix.
Definitely worth the time it takes to watch it, but I wouldn't necessarily recommend spending more than your Netflix subscription on it.
MWO: Adamski
i saw in the cinema on a whim because i'd seen everything else out that week and i can tell you it is definitely not worth the time it takes to watch it. at all.
i dont regret many things, but i do regret my money getting added to bay box office that day.
Like you said, the first part at the World's Fair is amazing.
They really could have gone in a better direction with
The ending was completely awful, I agree.
e: oh there it is
Well, better than Sue Storm from the first F4, where her main superpower was becoming visible and naked at awkward times!
That would have been an awesome power. If only we had gotten that instead of...I'm sure she did something in those movies...whatever that was.
She got caught in the buff a few times.
I mean, it was Jessica Alba, so it wasn't like I was complaining too much...
Wait, it was Jessica Alba. She managed to make being a stripper in Sin City mundane and boring. Her "caught in the nude" bits in F4 were eyeroll-worthy.
That always seemed so stupid to me. It's Jessica Alba, and a PG-13 comic book movie, they aren't going to show her naked so why write so many "almost naked" sequences? It would've made more sense and been more in character to have Johnny keep winding up in the buff anyway and it's Chris Evans so you can show a hell of a lot more And keep your precious PG13.
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And with him you could always have , ah, strategically placed fireball.
I always go to the doctor immediately when I have strategically placed fireballs.
That movie managed to make Ultimate Galactus boring.
The Eye made me wonder if I would enjoy the movie more if I were blind, which is not a good thing when all you've got going on are the looks of your main star.
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