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Improper Replies

JordynJordyn Registered User regular
edited December 2007 in Singularity Engine++
My phone rang last night

"Hello?"
"Hi Jordyn, sweetie. It's Mary."
"..."
"Your dad's girlfriend."
"oh uh ok."

I see my dad about once every 5 years. Now his girlfriend his calling me? What in the fuck. She starts getting all weepy and shit and my immediate thought "ah fuck, my dad didn't die or some shit, did he? I can't go to some funeral and pretend to be sad."

No, apparently my dad's mom died. Sometimes referred to as a grandma. I didn't really know her either though so whatever.

Mary wants me to talk to my dad on the phone, like what do I say? Gosh dad, sorry that lady I guess I was related to but didn't know at all died. She puts him on the line and he says a bunch of stuff including "it's nice to hear your voice" which kinda pissed me off, and a bunch of other stuff pissed me off.

But before Mary handed him the phone she said "I love you."

I LOVE YOU. This lady I never talk to, who I have met a total of maybe 3 times had just decided to say "I love you" to me, expressing, among others things, the fact that she knows absolutely nothing about me and is stupid.

I replied


"uhng"


How have you improperly replied to things?

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JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
Jordyn on
«134

Posts

  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited December 2007
    not uhng-ta?

    Mysst on
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  • FalloutFallout GIRL'S DAY EVERY DAYRegistered User regular
    edited December 2007
    what would framling say if he knew about the title of this thread

    he would be ashamed

    Fallout on
    xcomsig.png
  • RageRage Registered User
    edited December 2007
    Shouldn't that be iMproper?

    Fram's working on the divorce paperwork already.

    edit: hi5 Fallout

    Rage on
  • SeriouslySeriously Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Maybe she heard it as mmmmmmmmm

    Seriously on
  • JordynJordyn Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    ah fuck, I'll fix it.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    My phone rang last night

    "Hello?"
    "Hi Shibby, sweetie. It's Mary."
    "..."
    "Your dad's girlfriend."
    "oh uh ok."

    I see my dad about once every 5 years. Now his girlfriend his calling me? What in the fuck. She starts getting all weepy and shit and my immediate thought "ah fuck, my dad didn't die or some shit, did he? I can't go to some funeral and pretend to be sad."

    No, apparently my dad's mom died. Sometimes referred to as a grandma. I didn't really know her either though so whatever.

    Mary wants me to talk to my dad on the phone, like what do I say? Gosh dad, sorry that lady I guess I was related to but didn't know at all died. She puts him on the line and he says a bunch of stuff including "it's nice to hear your voice" which kinda pissed me off, and a bunch of other stuff pissed me off.

    But before Mary handed him the phone she said "I love you."

    I LOVE YOU. This lady I never talk to, who I have met a total of maybe 3 times had just decided to say "I love you" to me, expressing, among others things, the fact that she knows absolutely nothing about me and is stupid.

    I replied


    "uhng"


    Thats how I did it

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    This one time a guy walked up to me and was all like, "Hey, fag. Why don't you go get a job?"

    And I was all like, "SLEEP NOW IN THE FIRE!"

    And I started headbanging around him.

    No, wait.

    That was the proper response.

    ChicoBlue on
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I was once pulled over for speeding and before anything could happen I accidentally gave the cop a blowjob


    lucky break, eh?

    Javen on
    bar-cc-1.jpg
  • SeriouslySeriously Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    What is the point of that post, shibbylube?

    Seriously on
  • DrIanMalcolmDrIanMalcolm Does somebody go out into the park and pull up the dinosaurs' skirts?Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Oota buuta Solo?

    DrIanMalcolm on
    dfd58e54-76e3-4cca-a87e-8fabd8a8c8eb_zpscb3d0a8b.jpg
  • Zombies Tossed My Salad!Zombies Tossed My Salad! Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Some chick at a show called me a dick head.

    I stuttered for a second and came up with "cunt...butt..."

    and then I turned around

    Zombies Tossed My Salad! on
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I also reply to as many questions as possible with fitting Gladiator quotes.

    You'd be surprised to find how many times "You sold me queer giraffes" is applicable in everyday conversation

    Javen on
    bar-cc-1.jpg
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Some chick at a show called me a dick head.

    I stuttered for a second and came up with "cunt...butt..."

    and then I turned around

    Man you are like

    so metal

    Javen on
    bar-cc-1.jpg
  • lostwordslostwords Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    ChicoBlue, i just want to say your posts today have been high-larious.

    Also, umm, my bbcode was messed up one time, i guess.

    lostwords on
    rat.jpg tumbler? steam/ps3 thingie: lostwords Amazon Wishlist!
  • Auntie ShibbyAuntie Shibby Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    What is the point of my post, Jordyn?

    Auntie Shibby on
    clowninthewoods.png
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    My roommate's girlfriend's father, after being diagnosed with terminal cancer, discussed with his doctor the things he wanted to do before he died.

    Doc: "Well, what sorts of things, sky diving, mountain climbing, etc?"

    CancerDad: "Well...I've never fucked a midget."


    During his memorial service a week or two ago the minister began talking about 'Living life to the fullest, etc.' and CancerDad's wife whispered to their daughter (my roommate's girlfriend) 'This is the midget speech' and she burst out laughing.

    Abracadaniel on
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    one time an ex said "I love you" and I informed her I had to poop

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • The Far SideThe Far Side __BANNED USERS regular
    edited December 2007
    Javen wrote: »
    I was once pulled over for speeding and before anything could happen I accidentally gave the cop a blowjob


    lucky break, eh?
    shit, welcome to my world

    The Far Side on
    33aqfwk.jpg
  • JordynJordyn Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Lots of times when people order tickets at work, I will say "You're welcome" or "No problem" out of habit before they say something that I should say those in response to.

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • PiptheFairPiptheFair Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    My roommate's girlfriend's father, after being diagnosed with terminal cancer, discussed with his doctor the things he wanted to do before he died.

    Doc: "Well, what sorts of things, sky diving, mountain climbing, etc?"

    CancerDad: "Well...I've never fucked a midget."


    During his memorial service a week or two ago the minister began talking about 'Living life to the fullest, etc.' and CancerDad's wife whispered to their daughter (my roommate's girlfriend) 'This is the midget speech' and she burst out laughing.

    ahahahhaa

    PiptheFair on
    STEAM
    Skayel wrote:
    One time, I had a friend over to play a bit of Red Alert on my LAN. During the game he said he needed to go to the bathroom, so we paused it. After about 10 minutes of wondering where the hell he went, I get up and go to check on him.

    Turns out he was trying to screw my dog.
    Once I was taking a poop at a restaurant and a kid crept underneath the door into my stall. I let out a big fart and then he threw up all over the floor in front of me and I just stared at him.
  • The Far SideThe Far Side __BANNED USERS regular
    edited December 2007
    "you too!"

    The Far Side on
    33aqfwk.jpg
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    PiptheFair wrote: »
    Dumb Hero wrote: »
    My roommate's girlfriend's father, after being diagnosed with terminal cancer, discussed with his doctor the things he wanted to do before he died.

    Doc: "Well, what sorts of things, sky diving, mountain climbing, etc?"

    CancerDad: "Well...I've never fucked a midget."


    During his memorial service a week or two ago the minister began talking about 'Living life to the fullest, etc.' and CancerDad's wife whispered to their daughter (my roommate's girlfriend) 'This is the midget speech' and she burst out laughing.

    ahahahhaa

    We tried so hard to find a female midget who would dress up in a nurses outfit for when he became bedridden. Midgets are harder to find that you'd think.

    Abracadaniel on
  • JordynJordyn Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    What is the point of my post, Jordyn?

    Improper reply

    Jordyn on
    thumbsupguy-1.jpg
    JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
  • MysstMysst King Monkey of Hedonism IslandRegistered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Once I was asked if the sex the previous night was unsatisfactory.

    I said yes.

    Mysst on
    smacksigcopy-1.jpg
    Twitter Steam Playstation- Mechaphiliac
  • KeithKeith Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Jordyn wrote: »
    Lots of times when people order tickets at work, I will say "You're welcome" or "No problem" out of habit before they say something that I should say those in response to.

    I do this.

    "Do you have any Wiis?"
    "Nope."
    "oh...."
    "No problem."
    "Uh....thanks"

    Keith on
    ej0SzAe.jpg
  • Wise_aWise_a Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    "you too!"

    take luck

    good luck taking the luck that you may have

    Wise_a on

  • theDangertheDanger Registered User
    edited December 2007
    At my last job, which was at a library on my college campus, the boss that I really liked got replaced by the boss that I ended up really hating. In another branch of the library, the woman's husband was also employed manager/alcoholic. Now, it so happens that I often ended up in this other branch of the library frequently, and was good friends with many of the employees there, so would often hang around. Whilst doing so, I was just casually glancing at the shelves where they keep books people have put on hold for later pickup.
    I noticed, that among many self-help and motivational books that the husband had, were two books dealing with custody battles. That boss-lady was always showing pictures of their little baby.
    Later that week, when ms. boss-lady came and sat on my desk and told me that she just wanted everyone to know she was going through a tough time and that she was beginning the process of divorce and she just hoped everyone would understand, I giggled.
    I didn't mean too, it just came out.

    theDanger on
  • JavenJaven Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    theDanger wrote: »
    At my last job, which was at a library on my college campus, the boss that I really liked got replaced by the boss that I ended up really hating. In another branch of the library, the woman's husband was also employed manager/alcoholic. Now, it so happens that I often ended up in this other branch of the library frequently, and was good friends with many of the employees there, so would often hang around. Whilst doing so, I was just casually glancing at the shelves where they keep books people have put on hold for later pickup.
    I noticed, that among many self-help and motivational books that the husband had, were two books dealing with custody battles. That boss-lady was always showing pictures of their little baby.
    Later that week, when ms. boss-lady came and sat on my desk and told me that she just wanted everyone to know she was going through a tough time and that she was beginning the process of divorce and she just hoped everyone would understand, I giggled.
    I didn't mean too, it just came out.

    you monster

    Javen on
    bar-cc-1.jpg
  • AbracadanielAbracadaniel Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Last weekend after laughing about some stupid little girls at the concession stand in the movie theater with the register guy he said 'Enjoy your movie, man.'

    'You too...uh...if you see a movie anytime soon...'

    Abracadaniel on
  • KeithKeith Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    theDanger wrote: »
    At my last job, which was at a library on my college campus, the boss that I really liked got replaced by the boss that I ended up really hating. In another branch of the library, the woman's husband was also employed manager/alcoholic. Now, it so happens that I often ended up in this other branch of the library frequently, and was good friends with many of the employees there, so would often hang around. Whilst doing so, I was just casually glancing at the shelves where they keep books people have put on hold for later pickup.
    I noticed, that among many self-help and motivational books that the husband had, were two books dealing with custody battles. That boss-lady was always showing pictures of their little baby.
    Later that week, when ms. boss-lady came and sat on my desk and told me that she just wanted everyone to know she was going through a tough time and that she was beginning the process of divorce and she just hoped everyone would understand, I giggled.
    I didn't mean too, it just came out.

    you're dumb

    Keith on
    ej0SzAe.jpg
  • theDangertheDanger Registered User
    edited December 2007
    Keith wrote: »
    theDanger wrote: »
    At my last job, which was at a library on my college campus, the boss that I really liked got replaced by the boss that I ended up really hating. In another branch of the library, the woman's husband was also employed manager/alcoholic. Now, it so happens that I often ended up in this other branch of the library frequently, and was good friends with many of the employees there, so would often hang around. Whilst doing so, I was just casually glancing at the shelves where they keep books people have put on hold for later pickup.
    I noticed, that among many self-help and motivational books that the husband had, were two books dealing with custody battles. That boss-lady was always showing pictures of their little baby.
    Later that week, when ms. boss-lady came and sat on my desk and told me that she just wanted everyone to know she was going through a tough time and that she was beginning the process of divorce and she just hoped everyone would understand, I giggled.
    I didn't mean too, it just came out.

    you're dumb

    it's funny. she seemed to have much the same reaction.

    theDanger on
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    One time a girl told me she liked my crotch-bulge. I said "right back at ya".

    That was a lie.

    Her crotch-bulge disgusted me.

    Ruckus on
    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • WeaverWeaver Hail CascadiaRegistered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Our server admin guy came around the corner and asked what was going on to which I replied, "Butts", which was a full & proper response.

    Weaver on
    hCpR4ri.jpg
    Steam: weavermatic
  • Bad-BeatBad-Beat Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    One day at work there was a long line of cutomers. Usually the general response when you start with a new customer is 'Thank you for waiting'.

    I didn't say it to one customer and because he was an ass he said, "thank you for waiting". To make me feel bad for not saying it to him.

    I just said "no problem" and finished serving him.

    Bad-Beat on
  • ObbiObbi Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited December 2007
    one time my software improperly responded with the wrong HTTP error which made me confused for longer than it should've.

    Obbi on
  • RuckusRuckus Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Obbi wrote: »
    one time my software improperly responded with the wrong HTTP error which made me confused for longer than it should've.

    HTTP 404 USER IS USELESS

    Learn to type, you n00b.

    Ruckus on
    Raneados wrote: »
    so what SPECIFICALLY is the problem with my hole?
  • MulletudeMulletude Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    I work as a courier for a company whose name includes the letters F and X. Sometimes people are saying things to me as I am trying to leave and I just smile and nod. I have no idea what was said or if they just told me they fucked my mom...Smile and nod.

    Mulletude on
    XBL-Dug Danger WiiU-DugDanger Steam-http://steamcommunity.com/id/DugDanger/
  • STATE OF THE ART ROBOTSTATE OF THE ART ROBOT Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    Yeah when my dads ex-girlfriend said "I love you" to me, it was awkward. Like what do you say to someone who you don't really know or like for that matter when they say that?

    STATE OF THE ART ROBOT on
  • NuzakNuzak Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    doctor: well, your temperature is about 30 [whatever] degrees.

    old woman, with massive tennis-ball sized cancer: oh that's good?

    [she looks at her loving husband, who has visited her every day in hospital and brought her good food and read to her and things. her husband smiles back, it's really touching.]

    doctor: yes, that's normal.

    my thoughts: [god i feel awkward just standing here like i've been doing for the last five minutes. better say something.]

    cancer woman: so i'm not dying then!

    me, jovially: yet!

    doctor, old woman, old man all staring at me: D :<

    Nuzak on
  • Burning OrganBurning Organ Registered User regular
    edited December 2007
    "you too!"

    Like when I say I'm going to go eat, and someone says "Have a nice dinner." I just respond with "You too!"


    (not the exact quote, 5 e$ for anyone who can find or remember the quote)

    EDIT: Oh, I was beatd.

    Burning Organ on
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