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I caught a pigeon today
Janson
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
So last week was my baby brother's 19th birthday and as he lives in the same city as me I offered to take him to see a movie in addition to his present. He said yes and we arranged to see Iron Man tonight but before we went to the cinema I suggested we have a meal as we were both pretty hungry.
So we were sitting in the restaurant and halfway through our meal when my brother goes to the bathrooms (he'd spilt something on a white t-shirt so went to scrub it off before it stained). As I'm sitting there I hear a shriek from the waitress and a flapping of wings and look up to see a pigeon flying around the room. The waitress and another waiter are in a bit of a panic and looking at each other wondering what to do.
Well, fortunately my brother and I had a table by the window. The pigeon headed straight for the window, collided with the glass and dropped down onto the table. I seized the opportunity while it was still a little stunned to jump up and put my hands around it, pinning its wings to its sides, and pick it up. I then carried it out of the restaurant (it didn't struggle, strangely enough; okay, I was pinning its wings but it didn't even really attempt to move) and placed it down on the ground where it looked around itself in a bit of a daze and then flew off.
The waitress said thank you with a sigh of relief but sadly that was all my efforts bought me. The meal was still pretty expensive. I did wash my hands before touching my food again because pigeons are vermin. Once I saw a pigeon drop dead out of the sky in front of me. I thought about poking its body to see if it really was dead but decided the fact that it was on its back was enough.
So we were sitting in the restaurant and halfway through our meal when my brother goes to the bathrooms (he'd spilt something on a white t-shirt so went to scrub it off before it stained). As I'm sitting there I hear a shriek from the waitress and a flapping of wings and look up to see a pigeon flying around the room. The waitress and another waiter are in a bit of a panic and looking at each other wondering what to do.
Well, fortunately my brother and I had a table by the window. The pigeon headed straight for the window, collided with the glass and dropped down onto the table. I seized the opportunity while it was still a little stunned to jump up and put my hands around it, pinning its wings to its sides, and pick it up. I then carried it out of the restaurant (it didn't struggle, strangely enough; okay, I was pinning its wings but it didn't even really attempt to move) and placed it down on the ground where it looked around itself in a bit of a daze and then flew off.
The waitress said thank you with a sigh of relief but sadly that was all my efforts bought me. The meal was still pretty expensive. I did wash my hands before touching my food again because pigeons are vermin. Once I saw a pigeon drop dead out of the sky in front of me. I thought about poking its body to see if it really was dead but decided the fact that it was on its back was enough.
Janson on
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because thats the polite thing to do
Like a waterballoon.
Not even joking either.
pack up folks
But with a squirrel?
Mm, pigeon pie. At least that meal would've been free. But sometimes I actually do feel a little bit of pity for small creatures. I saved a mouse my friend's cat was trying to kill, although that was because I didn't want to have to pick up a dead and gutted mouse off her floor rather than because I wanted the mouse to live.
and then a full-grown lion just busted all up in our office! I had to basically wrestle it for a minute but then we managed to get it out the door and onto the sidewalk finally
though they seem to think it's treasure they're leaving you
Well I got 100 problems.
i had a real mouser of a cat once
would eat their heads and leave the rest on my doorstep
like some sort of crazy paper boy
dang wam you like hercules
aaah skeet skeet skeet skeet skeet skeet
I'm sorry i'll behave
that was amazing
http://youtube.com/watch?v=21nZ9P0SenA
more like popeye, only with alcohol instead of spinach
I had a cat that must've been the opposite of tsplitter's cat. Ate the bodies and left the heads in the long grass for us to find when we sat down in the garden to have a picnic.
Spelling pigeon obviously is, though.
his name is buzzkill
noooooo
As we drove away, I turned my head and watched a car driving in the opposite direction speed up deliberately to hit it. Man, you might do that to a pigeon but you don't do that to a pheasant.
last night, oddly enough, the conversation turned to a woman whose super power was that her body generated electricity when she was turned on.
so she had to fuck villains to kill them
i named her :!:VOLTLUPTIOUS:!:
My hormones are a little on the fritz today. Iron Man nearly made me cry in an early scene.
janson - which scene?
he was my favourite troll
ya hear that zonky? carry a dictionary and you're in