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The Virginity Fetish

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Posts

  • TrowizillaTrowizilla Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Trowizilla wrote: »
    Plutocracy wrote: »
    Preacher wrote: »

    Honestly I don't believe the numbers would be that low, ignoring the fact outside of bravado there is a limited possibility of a male ever hitting 50 partners during normal sexual relations in a life time, let alone marrying age.

    I bet if you asked women and men "Would you marry a partner who had slept with 10 people previous to your relationship?" Women would answer in the affirmative more then men by a considerable margin.

    Couldn't that be attributed to the fact that for a woman to truly enjoy sexual intercourse she needs a guy who knows what he's doing while men can reach orgasm more easily?

    From my own (ahem) research, it's just as hard to get a man off as it is to get a woman off. We're not born with blowjob instructions, you know. Men are, however, more encouraged to explore their own bodies, and thus are likelier to be able to get themselves off during sex.

    I dunno, are you talking about oral, anal, or vaginal sex? And of course, not counting things that don't directly stimulate the genitals, like, I dunno, dripping hot wax on your partner's back and whatnot. Oral sex, I would agree with you. Anal/vaginal sex, I'm not so sure.

    I'm talking about the whole shebang, but more on the oral side, as that's the part that needs skill. Guys can , of course, more-or-less masturbate into a vagina, but that's not a skill.
    Hakkekage wrote: »
    I don't know, I don't exactly have experience, but it just seems from a purely practical view that it's easier for guys because they have a big whacking thing right there that's hard to miss, whereas for girls it takes a bit more finesse.

    [tiny]This is part of the reason why I have never been able to get myself off, I think.[/tiny]

    Interestingly, both sexes tend to discover masturbation as toddlers about equally. (Although I'm not hunting for the study I read this in; that's not a search string I want connected to me. D:) There's a lot more information available to guys in the cultural consciousness, though, so learning the technique when they're older is probably easier. I mean, even 10-year-olds know that that beating-off motion = male masturbation; it's featured pretty often on tv, even if just from the waist up, and "jerk-off" is a pretty common term. Female masturbation, however, is much more under-the-rug (:winky:) and barely ever referenced in pop culture.

    Silly personal anecdote time: for ages, I didn't know female masturbation had a name. I called it "billying" for some reason and thought I invented it.

  • DracilDracil Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Senshi wrote: »
    Getting "sick to the stomach" is definitely over the top, but does any guy really enjoy thinking about their girlfriend's other partners, much less in detail? Whether or not they've had sex before isn't a big deal in the slightest--just enjoy the time you have with her. She has a past, just like you, get over it and love her for what she is: a person, just like you.

    For most, it's just a touch of jealousy. It's a known human flaw, not really a huge deal unless people start taking drastic measures.

    Actually yes. There is a complementary fetish to virginity fetish. The cuckold fetish. In fact, I think I've heard of virginity fetishes morphing into cuckold fetishes. A sort of coping mechanism.

  • IreneDAdlerIreneDAdler Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Trowizilla wrote: »
    Hakkekage wrote: »
    I don't know, I don't exactly have experience, but it just seems from a purely practical view that it's easier for guys because they have a big whacking thing right there that's hard to miss, whereas for girls it takes a bit more finesse.

    [tiny]This is part of the reason why I have never been able to get myself off, I think.[/tiny]

    Interestingly, both sexes tend to discover masturbation as toddlers about equally. (Although I'm not hunting for the study I read this in; that's not a search string I want connected to me. D:) There's a lot more information available to guys in the cultural consciousness, though, so learning the technique when they're older is probably easier. I mean, even 10-year-olds know that that beating-off motion = male masturbation; it's featured pretty often on tv, even if just from the waist up, and "jerk-off" is a pretty common term. Female masturbation, however, is much more under-the-rug (:winky:) and barely ever referenced in pop culture.

    Well, the thing is, male genitalia is pretty self-explanatory. Female genitalia isn't quite so obvious. It doesn't take much imagination or persistence to figure out what to do with a penis (though I'm sure you can achieve greater payoffs if you invested the effort), but even just finding the clitoris could take some patience.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • TrowizillaTrowizilla Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Trowizilla wrote: »
    Hakkekage wrote: »
    I don't know, I don't exactly have experience, but it just seems from a purely practical view that it's easier for guys because they have a big whacking thing right there that's hard to miss, whereas for girls it takes a bit more finesse.

    [tiny]This is part of the reason why I have never been able to get myself off, I think.[/tiny]

    Interestingly, both sexes tend to discover masturbation as toddlers about equally. (Although I'm not hunting for the study I read this in; that's not a search string I want connected to me. D:) There's a lot more information available to guys in the cultural consciousness, though, so learning the technique when they're older is probably easier. I mean, even 10-year-olds know that that beating-off motion = male masturbation; it's featured pretty often on tv, even if just from the waist up, and "jerk-off" is a pretty common term. Female masturbation, however, is much more under-the-rug (:winky:) and barely ever referenced in pop culture.

    Well, the thing is, male genitalia is pretty self-explanatory. Female genitalia isn't quite so obvious. It doesn't take much imagination or persistence to figure out what to do with a penis (though I'm sure you can achieve greater payoffs if you invested the effort), but even just finding the clitoris could take some patience.

    I'm kind of curious how much of that is just the amount of ignorance about female genitalia in general. My brothers were told the correct names for their junk (penis and scrotum) basically as soon as they could talk, but I was taught to call my whole genital area "vagina." It's a lot harder to "find" your clit if you don't know that you have one, or that women masturbate at all!

  • Loren MichaelLoren Michael Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Knowing that someone is a virgin is an easy way to not be terribly concerned about STDs without asking potentially awkward questions, as people tend to wear the "virgin" label a little more prominently than the "no herpes and no warts!" label.

    2ezikn6.jpg
  • TrowizillaTrowizilla Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Knowing that someone is a virgin is an easy way to not be terribly concerned about STDs without asking potentially awkward questions, as people tend to wear the "virgin" label a little more prominently than the "no herpes and no warts!" label.

    Not necessarily. There's plenty of people who consider themselves virgins while still having risky oral and anal sex.

    And if you can't ask potentially awkward questions, you shouldn't be having sex.

  • Loren MichaelLoren Michael Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Trowizilla wrote: »
    Knowing that someone is a virgin is an easy way to not be terribly concerned about STDs without asking potentially awkward questions, as people tend to wear the "virgin" label a little more prominently than the "no herpes and no warts!" label.

    Not necessarily. There's plenty of people who consider themselves virgins while still having risky oral and anal sex.

    That's all true enough.

    I forgot about that.

    2ezikn6.jpg
  • ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS
    edited June 2008
    Trowizilla wrote: »
    And if you can't ask potentially awkward questions, you shouldn't be having sex.

    Holy shit golded for absolute truth.

    Medopine wrote: »
    Fuck that woman going "oh god oh no!!"

    It's nature, bitch
  • SkutSkutSkutSkut Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Miscommunication is a big spreader of stds, instead of worrying about it afterwards, you should ask before, and use a condom anyway unless it's a long term relationship and you're both 100% sure you're both clean.

  • IreneDAdlerIreneDAdler Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Trowizilla wrote: »
    I'm kind of curious how much of that is just the amount of ignorance about female genitalia in general. My brothers were told the correct names for their junk (penis and scrotum) basically as soon as they could talk, but I was taught to call my whole genital area "vagina." It's a lot harder to "find" your clit if you don't know that you have one, or that women masturbate at all!

    I certainly agree with you about the lack of education about female genitalia, but I still think that, even given a completely naive person, he or she would know what you're supposed to do with a penis just by looking at it. Form follows function and all that, you know.

    @ Loren, STDs is definitely a good reason, but I don't really think that the questions have to be awkward. If I ever broke up with my boyfriend and started dating other people, I would tell them to go get tested for all the STDs under the sun before I'm willing to take my top off. And I wouldn't feel awkward or embarrassed about this, I'm just taking logical precaution to protect my own health. We're adults now and so should be able to communicate openly about practical things like this.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Torso BoyTorso Boy Registered User
    edited June 2008
    I dunno, high school chicks are annoying and I don't like getting blood on it so I can't relate to this fetish very well.

    Rent wrote: »
    So that's what having no idea what you are talking about looks like
  • Loren MichaelLoren Michael Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    What? There's blood?

    She lied to me.

    2ezikn6.jpg
  • NirakoneNirakone Registered User
    edited June 2008
    Well apparently talking to a foreign soldier is enough for an honour killing :

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/may/11/iraq.humanrights
    Speaking with a foreign solider, she lost what is the most precious thing for any woman. 'People from western countries might be shocked, but our girls are not like their daughters that can sleep with any man they want and sometimes even get pregnant without marrying. Our girls should respect their religion, their family and their bodies.

    So talking to a foreigner = losing virginity to this guy.

  • syndalissyndalis Getting Classy On the WallRegistered User, Loves Apple Products regular
    edited June 2008
  • electricitylikesmeelectricitylikesme Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Hakkekage wrote: »
    Trowizilla wrote: »

    From my own (ahem) research, it's just as hard to get a man off as it is to get a woman off. We're not born with blowjob instructions, you know. Men are, however, more encouraged to explore their own bodies, and thus are likelier to be able to get themselves off during sex.

    I don't know, I don't exactly have experience, but it just seems from a purely practical view that it's easier for guys because they have a big whacking thing right there that's hard to miss, whereas for girls it takes a bit more finesse.

    [tiny]This is part of the reason why I have never been able to get myself off, I think.[/tiny]
    This is pretty much wrong. It is incredibly easy to get myself off in a purely functional unfun way (something about strain on the knees/thighs seems to do the trick), but it actually takes a pretty exception mental effort to get off with a women.

    Of course this probably depends on what she's good at too, but the same is equally applicable for guys as well.

  • ege02ege02 __BANNED USERS
    edited June 2008
    Nirakone wrote: »
    Well apparently talking to a foreign soldier is enough for an honour killing :

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/may/11/iraq.humanrights
    Speaking with a foreign solider, she lost what is the most precious thing for any woman. 'People from western countries might be shocked, but our girls are not like their daughters that can sleep with any man they want and sometimes even get pregnant without marrying. Our girls should respect their religion, their family and their bodies.

    So talking to a foreigner = losing virginity to this guy.

    Yep, that is what fundie Islam is, people. These people are insane beyond redemption.

    Medopine wrote: »
    Fuck that woman going "oh god oh no!!"

    It's nature, bitch
  • trevelliantrevellian Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Trowizilla wrote: »
    And if you can't ask potentially awkward questions, you shouldn't be having sex.

    McGough_EA.png
  • The CatThe Cat Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    You know hearing this about the Muslim community is hardly surprising to me. I think I'm just sort of numb to insanity from the religious sector.

    What was more surprisingly (and made me more angry) was apparently a survey by Maxim or the like in Australia found something like 47% of (male) respondants said they would prefer to marry a women who was a virgin on their wedding night.

    What. The. Fuck.

    Needless to say, that made me feel like going out there and punching 47% of men in the face. I mean after all the alleged social progress in this country, you get 47% of a survey saying that, that is fucked up.

    Come on, they were Zoo readers. Most of them are 14. But yeah, disturbing and also they can go to hell.

    tmsig.jpg
  • The CatThe Cat Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Lemming wrote: »
    Lemming wrote: »
    You know hearing this about the Muslim community is hardly surprising to me. I think I'm just sort of numb to insanity from the religious sector.

    What was more surprisingly (and made me more angry) was apparently a survey by Maxim or the like in Australia found something like 47% of (male) respondants said they would prefer to marry a women who was a virgin on their wedding night.

    What. The. Fuck.

    Needless to say, that made me feel like going out there and punching 47% of men in the face. I mean after all the alleged social progress in this country, you get 47% of a survey saying that, that is fucked up.

    What about the percentage of those men who were virgins themselves?
    No idea. And I don't really think it matters from that perspective anyway - I like to imagine that somehow we have a country of people who think in a slightly wider ranging mindset. But apparently not.

    I think wanting to remain celibate until you're married as well as wanting to marry someone who was celibate until they married you is a valid mindset.

    Somehow I don't think that christians and other morally 'upright' types comprise the main readership demographic of Zoo or any other lad magazine, sweetie.

    tmsig.jpg
  • Double_FacesDouble_Faces Registered User
    edited June 2008
    The Cat wrote: »
    Lemming wrote: »
    Lemming wrote: »
    You know hearing this about the Muslim community is hardly surprising to me. I think I'm just sort of numb to insanity from the religious sector.

    What was more surprisingly (and made me more angry) was apparently a survey by Maxim or the like in Australia found something like 47% of (male) respondants said they would prefer to marry a women who was a virgin on their wedding night.

    What. The. Fuck.

    Needless to say, that made me feel like going out there and punching 47% of men in the face. I mean after all the alleged social progress in this country, you get 47% of a survey saying that, that is fucked up.

    What about the percentage of those men who were virgins themselves?
    No idea. And I don't really think it matters from that perspective anyway - I like to imagine that somehow we have a country of people who think in a slightly wider ranging mindset. But apparently not.

    I think wanting to remain celibate until you're married as well as wanting to marry someone who was celibate until they married you is a valid mindset.

    Somehow I don't think that christians and other morally 'upright' types comprise the main readership demographic of Zoo or any other lad magazine, sweetie.

    Sounds like someone isn't Catholic.

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  • The CatThe Cat Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Well, honestly, that's what's so worrying about that survey. Aus is not a religious country. There's not much cultural impetus for that belief anymore, so one can conclude that its not being expressed as a 'God said this is how it oughta be' sort of thing, but rather an 'I want someone I have more power over', or 'I want to not feel insecure about my performance and god forbid I assuage that insecurity by talking to my partner, she should just never know the touch of another man so that she'll have no point of comparison' thing. Which, ew.

    Oh hey, I broke what little hymen I had myself because I didn't want my first time to be associated with blood and pain (awkwardness is quite enough kthnx). Does that make me a trollop?

    Because trollop is an awesome word.

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  • Double_FacesDouble_Faces Registered User
    edited June 2008
    The Cat wrote: »
    'I want to not feel insecure about my performance and god forbid I assuage that insecurity by talking to my partner, she should just never know the touch of another man so that she'll have no point of comparison' thing. Which, ew.

    I certainly hope that you read the posts where I did my best to make my points clear on exactly what I meant. I don't have the time nor the energy to retype them a third time so please go back and read before you blow my statements out of proportion to argue a point that isn't being made by me.

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  • The CatThe Cat Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    I'm speaking in general terms about the survey respondents there, kiddo. Not accusing you. Unless you're feeling guilty?

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  • Double_FacesDouble_Faces Registered User
    edited June 2008
    C'mon Cat, you just recited the thesis of the entire middle of this thread that has already been cleared up. But please, don't let that stop you. Continue bringing up closed arguments.

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  • The CatThe Cat Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited June 2008
    Uh, no. Really. For many men, wanting a virgin is about desperately not wanting to compete sexually with another man, while forgetting that those other men are out of their lady's life for a reason. If this makes you sad, go find somewhere to shed a few tears. Get it out of your system.

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  • HacksawHacksaw J Duggan Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Think of it this way, fellas: if she's fucking you exclusively, you've won. That's it, game over. You have fucking won. She could go out there and bone half the guys at the local pub, but she's not. Instead, she's home with you, playing Hide the Snake. Other guys? Don't even worry about it; they're not sticking their man meat into her clam chowder (for the sake of argument). If that's not not competing with other men sexually, I don't know what is.

    EDIT: Double your points if you married her.

    Assign bonus points if you've had children together.

  • SenshiSenshi Registered User
    edited June 2008
    You lost me at "married" and scared me at "children".

    >Signatures
    >2012
    ISHYGDDT
  • DodgeBlanDodgeBlan Gaderen PSN: GaderenRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I desperately do not want to compete sexually with other men.

    OooOOOoOoOOOooOOOoOOOoOoOOoOOoOOOOOOOOoooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooo
  • HacksawHacksaw J Duggan Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    DodgeBlan wrote: »
    I desperately do not want to compete sexually with other men.
    The solution is to find a girlfriend who wants exclusitivity. Once you've got that, competition no more!

  • DodgeBlanDodgeBlan Gaderen PSN: GaderenRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Actually a better solution would be to become a better sexer, but i am pretty lazy.

    OooOOOoOoOOOooOOOoOOOoOoOOoOOoOOOOOOOOoooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooo
  • HacksawHacksaw J Duggan Wrestler at LawRegistered User regular
    edited June 2008
    DodgeBlan wrote: »
    Actually a better solution would be to become a better sexer, but i am pretty lazy.
    I like my way better because it results in a stable relationship with minimal chance of STIs.

  • Zilla360Zilla360 Spaaaace! In Space.Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    Variable wrote: »
    imagine if there was a way to tell if a male was a virgin. I wonder if it would even matter.
    Posts on Slashdot.
    Spoiler:

  • Burden of ProofBurden of Proof You three boys picked a beautiful hill to die on. Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    ha ha, virgins are stupid.

  • ElldrenElldren 3067-6294-6208Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    ha ha, the sexual fetishization of virginity is stupid.

    fixed

  • MikeManMikeMan Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    ha ha, virgins are stupid.

    But virgins are stupid when it comes to sex.

    I had no idea what the fuck I was doing before I had sex. I had no idea what it took to be a mature, responsible sexual partner. That's because you learn this shit as you go along. You don't read about it in a magazine, you don't get the hang of it from porn (please god no). You learn by doing, making mistakes, learning from them.

    That is why I definitely, 100% do not want to marry a virgin. I mean holy shit. Chick could be into, like, ball-crushing as the only way she gets off. Sure, it's highly unlikely that she'll discover that, but you have no idea what even your own preferences are until you try them.

    HOW DO YOU FUCK UP BAGELS. YOU BOIL THE WATER. PUT IN THE NOODLES
  • electricitylikesmeelectricitylikesme Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I don't think I was really stupid about sex when I was a virgin. But then again I'm not entirely sure why that was either - I suspect however this probably had something to do with my early obsession with erotic fiction when the internets was still only 33.6k.

  • Psycho Internet HawkPsycho Internet Hawk Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    I stopped caring about virginity after the first (and only) time I took someone's and it turned out to be the worst sex ever. People with previous sexual experience are likely to be better at it.

    The only thing I really remember from my first time was that it hurt. They never tell you it can hurt for guys. And since that was my focus, I know I wasn't very good.

    ezek1t.jpg
  • FellhandFellhand Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    The only thing I really remember from my first time was that it hurt. They never tell you it can hurt for guys. And since that was my focus, I know I wasn't very good.

    o_O Did you bend it wrong or something? I've heard guys say their first time was quite fast, but never that it hurt them.

  • PreacherPreacher Registered User regular
    edited June 2008
    ha ha, virgins are stupid.

    Oh look someone who read the title of the thread and didn't bother to read the thread. Congratulations you win the dumbshit award for the day. Go to SE++ to collect your prize.

  • LemmingLemming Registered User
    edited June 2008
    The Cat wrote: »
    Lemming wrote: »
    Lemming wrote: »
    You know hearing this about the Muslim community is hardly surprising to me. I think I'm just sort of numb to insanity from the religious sector.

    What was more surprisingly (and made me more angry) was apparently a survey by Maxim or the like in Australia found something like 47% of (male) respondants said they would prefer to marry a women who was a virgin on their wedding night.

    What. The. Fuck.

    Needless to say, that made me feel like going out there and punching 47% of men in the face. I mean after all the alleged social progress in this country, you get 47% of a survey saying that, that is fucked up.

    What about the percentage of those men who were virgins themselves?
    No idea. And I don't really think it matters from that perspective anyway - I like to imagine that somehow we have a country of people who think in a slightly wider ranging mindset. But apparently not.

    I think wanting to remain celibate until you're married as well as wanting to marry someone who was celibate until they married you is a valid mindset.

    Somehow I don't think that christians and other morally 'upright' types comprise the main readership demographic of Zoo or any other lad magazine, sweetie.

    Well, I never said that they made up the majority, or even a significant minority, just that some of them probably were. But thanks for being patronizing.

This discussion has been closed.