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Depressing truths no. 9874:

245

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    SeolSeol Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    -SPI- wrote: »
    The PoP ds game confuses me. Prince of persia started as a sidescroller, so one would assume the new ds game would be the logical artistic progression of the PoP series? WRONG, it's shovelware.
    Fixed. And are you really that confused by that?

    Seol on
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    RookRook Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    To sum up the DS

    12729.jpg

    I'm quite impressed by how authentic this photoshop is. The fact that they've fooled several major websites into reviewing it as well is equally surprising.

    Rook on
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    -SPI--SPI- Osaka, JapanRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Daedalus wrote: »
    wait, chibi emo-Prince? That's hilarious.
    94594420080627screen002dc6.jpg

    Blearghhh

    -SPI- on
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    AntihippyAntihippy Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    -SPI- wrote: »
    Daedalus wrote: »
    wait, chibi emo-Prince? That's hilarious.
    94594420080627screen002dc6.jpg

    Blearghhh

    Chibi can be nice sometimes.

    This is not one of those times.

    He look like Choi from KoF without the awesome.

    Antihippy on
    10454_nujabes2.pngPSN: Antiwhippy
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    DaedalusDaedalus Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Hilarious.

    Daedalus on
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    GrisloGrislo Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    major_tom wrote: »
    TheGuero wrote: »
    major_tom wrote: »
    Normally, when faced with lists like this, I try to be all laissez-faire about it, and just calmly inform people that they're under no obligation to buy these games, so why the hell should they care?

    Then I remember that these things clutter up the fucking DS and Wii sections in shops so badly (especially the preowned, oh god) that I often literally cannot find the game I wanted beneath the mountains of crap. I mean, these games pose a serious logistical problem to me. Especially when shops insist on putting all the stuff I might actually want right at the back.

    I now have this mental image of myself, crushed under a mountain of imagine(tm) games, completely buried, with only my right arm emerging from the pile, with the copy of Rocket Slime I was after clutched in my outstretched, twitching hand.

    I think i'm going to invest in an actual shovel.

    Dramatic much? I understand where your coming from. But honestly, the clutter is not so bad that you cannot find your games. As a matter of fact, the only places that would honestly have that problem at all are places that you should not be buying games at anyway. Yeah, there's a bunch of shovelware. Alot of little girls and boys are going to buy these games and Ubisoft is going to make money. Also, Prince of Persia was on that list.

    To the guy that asked about Hell's Kitchen, I'm assuming that it will be a cooking game and not a gangster urban crime romp.

    I won't lie, I may have been exaggerating a tiny bit. Just for larks, y'know.

    I don't know about where you are, but even the 'specialist' game stores do let the shelves get filled with this kind of junk. Especially the preowned section, as they're obliged to take any crap that comes in, and children not being the most discerning of consumers, love to trade in the games their parents bought them last week for peanuts.

    I think the primary 'can't find any games' problem comes from places like EB stacking their shelves with 'X game is coming soon!' cases. On the day Soul Calibur 4 was released I couldn't find a copy because they literally had about 30 dvd cases for Diablo 3 ("Coming Soon!!!!") taking up their very limited shelf place at my local EB.

    But that's of course another problem for another thread.

    Grislo on
    This post was sponsored by Tom Cruise.
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    PeewiPeewi Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Rook wrote: »
    To sum up the DS

    12729.jpg

    I'm quite impressed by how authentic this photoshop is. The fact that they've fooled several major websites into reviewing it as well is equally surprising.

    So you're telling me that Gamestop has priced a game that doesn't exist? Hilarious.

    Peewi on
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    GyralGyral Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Peewi wrote: »
    Rook wrote: »
    To sum up the DS

    12729.jpg

    I'm quite impressed by how authentic this photoshop is. The fact that they've fooled several major websites into reviewing it as well is equally surprising.

    So you're telling me that Gamestop has priced a game that doesn't exist? Hilarious.

    They once had a listing for Morrowind for the PS2.

    Gyral on
    25t9pjnmqicf.jpg
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    RentRent I'm always right Fuckin' deal with itRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Peewi wrote: »
    Rook wrote: »
    To sum up the DS
    snip

    I'm quite impressed by how authentic this photoshop is. The fact that they've fooled several major websites into reviewing it as well is equally surprising.

    So you're telling me that Gamestop has priced a game that doesn't exist? Hilarious.

    Haha OH MAN that's good HAH HAH HAH

    Rent on
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    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    ben0207 wrote: »
    LewieP wrote: »
    We need an "Imagine" photoshop thread.
    I second this idea.

    I like how they're called Imagine but then all their titles are fairly mundane affairs. Imagine Walk to the Shops, Imagine Watching TV, Imagine Toast and Margarine for Breakfast.

    No no they're overtly sexist titles that enforce that girls should not be anything of merit.

    Like Imagine get him a steak woman!

    King Riptor on
    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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    RenzoRenzo Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    ben0207 wrote: »
    LewieP wrote: »
    We need an "Imagine" photoshop thread.
    I second this idea.

    I like how they're called Imagine but then all their titles are fairly mundane affairs. Imagine Walk to the Shops, Imagine Watching TV, Imagine Toast and Margarine for Breakfast.

    No no they're overtly sexist titles that enforce that girls should not be anything of merit.

    Like Imagine get him a steak woman!

    But they also add the letter Z to everything. (Imagine Dogz, Imagine Catz, Imagine Make me a Zandwich)

    Renzo on
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    ImpersonatorImpersonator Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Renzo wrote: »
    ben0207 wrote: »
    LewieP wrote: »
    We need an "Imagine" photoshop thread.
    I second this idea.

    I like how they're called Imagine but then all their titles are fairly mundane affairs. Imagine Walk to the Shops, Imagine Watching TV, Imagine Toast and Margarine for Breakfast.

    No no they're overtly sexist titles that enforce that girls should not be anything of merit.

    Like Imagine get him a steak woman!

    But they also add the letter Z to everything. (Imagine Dogz, Imagine Catz, Imagine Make me a Zandwich)

    These are all great ideas but how about someone making zee thread? :winky:

    Impersonator on
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    AbsoluteZeroAbsoluteZero The new film by Quentin Koopantino Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Most Successful Consoles + Shovelware = PROFIT!

    Shouldn't be that hard to understand.

    AbsoluteZero on
    cs6f034fsffl.jpg
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    RenzoRenzo Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    As long as Ubisoft make games like Prince of Persia and the (extremely :( ) occasional Beyond Good and Evil, they can make boatloads of shovelware for all I care.

    Far Cry 2 is looking very good too, and it's probably all floating on a bed of shovelware cash.

    Renzo on
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    GyralGyral Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I'm patiently waiting for the inevitable Imagine Barefoot and Pregnant and in the Kitchen Making Me a Sammich.

    Gyral on
    25t9pjnmqicf.jpg
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    slash000slash000 Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I think I lost a few brain cells after reading that list in the OP.

    slash000 on
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    Satanic JesusSatanic Jesus Hi, I'm Liam! with broken glassesRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I feel sort of emo nao.

    Satanic Jesus on
    my backloggery 3DS: 0533-5338-5186 steam: porcelain_cow goodreads
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    agoajagoaj Top Tier One FearRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    I feel sort of emo nao.

    Imagine: Down the Street, not across the road

    agoaj on
    ujav5b9gwj1s.png
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    bloodyroarxxbloodyroarxx Casa GrandeRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Djiem wrote: »
    This shovelware helps fund AAA titles.

    Exactly.

    Ubi has

    * Brothers in Arms: Hell's Highway (PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Far Cry 2 (PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Prince of Persia (2008) (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Rayman Raving Rabbids TV Party (Wii, DS, release in late 2008)
    * Tom Clancy's EndWar (PlayStation 3, PSP, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Shaun White Snowboarding (Wii, PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Naruto: The Broken Bond (Xbox 360)

    All of those shovelware games fund awesome stuff like this, it its not like you are forced to buy shitty budget games.

    bloodyroarxx on
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    APZonerunnerAPZonerunner Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    2lntx7b.png

    APZonerunner on
    APZonerunner | RPG Site | UFFSite | The Gaming Vault
    XBL/PSN/Steam: APZonerunner
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    slash000slash000 Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Hahahah.

    slash000 on
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    -SPI--SPI- Osaka, JapanRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Raving Rabbids isn't being funded by shovelware, it is shovelware.

    -SPI- on
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    SorensonSorenson Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    But is there a reason they can't fund their AAA titles with lower-budget games that, you know, aren't steaming piles of shit?

    Sorenson on
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    slash000slash000 Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Sorenson wrote: »
    But is there a reason they can't fund their AAA titles with lower-budget games that, you know, aren't steaming piles of shit?

    Naw. Ubi is an all-or-nothing kind of business.

    slash000 on
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    DjiemDjiem Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Sorenson wrote: »
    But is there a reason they can't fund their AAA titles with lower-budget games that, you know, aren't steaming piles of shit?

    Seeing how well these games sell, I don't think their target audience think they're shitty.

    Djiem on
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    King RiptorKing Riptor Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Djiem wrote: »
    Sorenson wrote: »
    But is there a reason they can't fund their AAA titles with lower-budget games that, you know, aren't steaming piles of shit?

    Seeing how well these games sell, I don't think their target audience think they're shitty.

    Their target audience is moron parents and little girls that think barbie is real.
    I usually couldn't care less but some of those imagine games are so fucking sexist it's disgusting.

    King Riptor on
    I have a podcast now. It's about video games and anime!Find it here.
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    korodullinkorodullin What. SCRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Petz: 13 years of making shitty pet simulators. They were the first, and I guess they'll be the last. Long after all the Nintendogs and Sims of the world are dead and gone, and people are dying from a nuclear holocaust, some half-broken algorithm at an abandoned Ubisoft development house will still be cranking out Petz-branded games.

    korodullin on
    ZvOMJnu.png
    - The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (2017, colorized)
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    PeewiPeewi Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Djiem wrote: »
    This shovelware helps fund AAA titles.

    Exactly.

    Ubi has

    * Brothers in Arms: Hell's Highway (PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Far Cry 2 (PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Prince of Persia (2008) (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Rayman Raving Rabbids TV Party (Wii, DS, release in late 2008)
    * Tom Clancy's EndWar (PlayStation 3, PSP, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Shaun White Snowboarding (Wii, PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Naruto: The Broken Bond (Xbox 360)

    All of those shovelware games fund awesome stuff like this, it its not like you are forced to buy shitty budget games.

    You call Rayman Raving Rabbids awesome stuff? I'm still bitter that it turned out to be a minigame collection rather than an awesome platformer like the first trailer indicated.

    Peewi on
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    ChrisDudeChrisDude Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    "Imagine Baby Club (DS) - 19/09/08"

    This means any one of three things to me:

    1. Imagine a baby being used as a club! Hit your friends!
    2. Imagine clubbing human babies as you would a baby seal!
    3. Imagine babies going clubbing and learning to be assholes and sluts before they even hit age 2! Why wait to see your child grow up to be someone nobody likes? Pounding trance CD soundtrack included!

    ChrisDude on
    Chris Pennell Is A Huge Nerd - My blog. I talk about nerd-ish things a lot.
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    bloodyroarxxbloodyroarxx Casa GrandeRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Peewi wrote: »
    Djiem wrote: »
    This shovelware helps fund AAA titles.

    Exactly.

    Ubi has

    * Brothers in Arms: Hell's Highway (PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Far Cry 2 (PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Prince of Persia (2008) (PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Rayman Raving Rabbids TV Party (Wii, DS, release in late 2008)
    * Tom Clancy's EndWar (PlayStation 3, PSP, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Shaun White Snowboarding (Wii, PlayStation 3, Xbox 360, Microsoft Windows)
    * Naruto: The Broken Bond (Xbox 360)

    All of those shovelware games fund awesome stuff like this, it its not like you are forced to buy shitty budget games.

    You call Rayman Raving Rabbids awesome stuff? I'm still bitter that it turned out to be a minigame collection rather than an awesome platformer like the first trailer indicated.

    I have lots of >8 year old cousins that love it so I'm kind of biased on that one.

    bloodyroarxx on
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    GyralGyral Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    ChrisDude wrote: »
    "Imagine Baby Club (DS) - 19/09/08"

    This means any one of three things to me:

    1. Imagine a baby being used as a club! Hit your friends!
    2. Imagine clubbing human babies as you would a baby seal!
    3. Imagine babies going clubbing and learning to be assholes and sluts before they even hit age 2! Why wait to see your child grow up to be someone nobody likes? Pounding trance CD soundtrack included!

    All three of those ideas are likely better than what the game actually is.

    Gyral on
    25t9pjnmqicf.jpg
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    cloudeaglecloudeagle Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    The reason there's this much shovelware is because a bunch of it actually sells. I remember a few of the animalz/babiez/whateverz showing up on the DS top 10, and when software is cheap to make, it doesn't have to chart to make a profit.

    And yeah, Ubi's still making non-shovelware games too. Though goddamn, that's a lot of shovelware.

    cloudeagle on
    Switch: 3947-4890-9293
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    darleysamdarleysam On my way to UKRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    ChrisDude wrote: »
    "Imagine Baby Club (DS) - 19/09/08"

    This means any one of three things to me:

    1. Imagine a baby being used as a club! Hit your friends!
    2. Imagine clubbing human babies as you would a baby seal!
    3. Imagine babies going clubbing and learning to be assholes and sluts before they even hit age 2! Why wait to see your child grow up to be someone nobody likes? Pounding trance CD soundtrack included!

    You know, I remember a random Vin Diesel fact about how he likes clapping babies together like blackboard erasers. It's called 'blapping'.

    darleysam on
    forumsig.png
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    cj iwakuracj iwakura The Rhythm Regent Bears The Name FreedomRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Sam Power looks like Imagine marketed towards boys, or something.

    cj iwakura on
    wVEsyIc.png
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    darleysamdarleysam On my way to UKRegistered User regular
    edited September 2008
    cj iwakura wrote: »
    Sam Power looks like Imagine marketed towards boys, or something.

    The name lies. We have no specific powers that any other name doesn't grant you.

    darleysam on
    forumsig.png
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    UnbreakableVowUnbreakableVow Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Wasn't Sam Power already some kid's franchise?

    EDIT: Never mind.

    pajama%20sam.jpg

    UnbreakableVow on
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    urahonkyurahonky Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    So I was at Target buying some XBL point cards (when they were on sale) and I was browsing around the Wii/DS section for a moment. I happened to eavesdrop on this family that was with one of the salesman. They were Christmas shopping.

    The conversation sorta went like this:

    "Hmm. I think he should get a video game or two for Josh for Christmas. I am just not sure what he likes."

    *browses*

    "OH MY GOD! Dolphinz! He loves Dolphins, so he has to like this game. Catz would be great for Jennifer!"

    *grabs them both*

    "They have baby sitting too? Jennifer might want that."

    *grabs it*

    ......

    At this point I wanted to slap the games out of their hands and yell: "THIS IS WHY THEY KEEP MAKING THESE GAMES! STOP IT!"

    urahonky on
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    Operator-COperator-C Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    As much as I hate to say it: these things sell. I think John Davidson's editorial in the latest EGM (What other people play, pg. 38 in sidebar) puts it into perspective.
    Games tied into significant pieces of youth-focused pop culture are more powerful than anything, and internet in SpongeBob games of D3Publisher's Ben 10 titles will pretty much always outweigh that of, say, Metal Gear Solid 4.
    More people are playing games, but the latest generation looks at them quite differently. As "aficionados," does that make us out of touch?

    He's right. With gaming more mainstream than ever before, thanks in large part to Nintendo, expect to see more of those "shovelware." It might be crap to us, the "aficionados," as Davidson put it, but it sells. That's what the people want.

    Frankly, I'm more indifferent as it I believe it keeps the industry alive and well. Though, I do slightly worry about shelf-space as others have mentioned. Then, of course, there's the slippery slope issue as well.

    Operator-C on
    camo_sig2.png
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    syrionsyrion Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Meh, those games fund the development of good games, just as the crap that Disney shovels out pays for the films Miramax makes.

    syrion on
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    DjiemDjiem Registered User regular
    edited September 2008
    Seriously, you guys are being stupid right now.
    Obviously, we, the self-called gamers, have higher standards when it comes to games production, but these people are having fun. We play our games to have fun, and so do they.

    You don't need super deep gameplay for people who don't know what the fuck you're talking about when you say clipping or hit detection. To them, the game rules or suck.

    These games also fund our "hardcore" games. It'll only be a problem when companies will stop making our "good" games and start making shovelware exclusively, but quite frankly, I don't see that happening any time soon.

    Djiem on
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