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Projeck · October 2008

BLAH BLAH BLAH

Pony · October 2008

those are words

Tube · October 2008

Asthma only happens to weak minded people.

Pony · October 2008

i just accomplish more achivemtns in tf2 than i ever did just now

it was on a bs server tho

still counts

sandvich is mine

seizureorbs · October 2008

oh god, scarab

I read all that and that is pretty scary

really glad I don't have asthma right now

Kovak · October 2008

a post about asthma?

Projeck · October 2008

pony how did you play tf2 one handed

BusterK · October 2008

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

Asthma only happens to weak minded people.

But Asthma can happen to anybody

The_Scarab · October 2008

It's nowhere near as serious but like I said, when you are a complete tool and misplace your medication, it very quickly turns horrifying.

Mr. Henry Bemis · October 2008

oh man i was there and i completely fucked up my stats but it was awesome

Tube · October 2008

BusterK wrote: »

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

Asthma only happens to weak minded people.

But Asthma can happen to anybody

no just weak minded people

Pony · October 2008

my stats are going to be lies forever but who cares

i have sandvich flaregun etc

sdrawkcaB emaN · October 2008

The_Scarab wrote: »

Asthma is pretty much the most tormenting and horrifying chronic condition.

I'm talking serious attacks here, not your wheezing run of the mill stuff.

One time, I laughed hard at John Stewart on the Daily Show so hard that I ended up having an episode. And I couldn't find my inhaler. Anywhere, I look high and low for a good ten minutes, and this is a small, very tidy place. It's gone. I shrug it off and assume it will pass, I can and have throughout my life dealt with minor attacks, you just sit down and watch TV. As a writer and an avid gamer I dont exactly have many anyways, you usually dont breath heavily sitting down at a desk.

But it's not getting better. It isn't subsiding. It's an hour later and I'm still not breathing fine. I open a window, get some fresh air, suck in some deep breaths of cold November air, it is denser, it feels like its working but it is only exacerbating the situation, chilling my lungs. I'm starting to worry now, it's not improving. Worry is your worst enemy, it increases your heart rate and by extension your breathing rate. But you cant breath enough so you feel dizzy. I tried everything, I google alternatives without medication. All of them are new age bollocks and herbal. Hot steam from a kettle is said to work, so I breath that in, holding my hand on the button so it burns off an entire three pints of water into vapour which burns my face and cheeks, and doesnt help things. I was desperate, and the doctors had told me water vapour does work in the past so its not like this was some internet mumbo.
So I'm stumbling around my apartment, literally unable to breath, like try it now, hold your breath, constantly. To the point where you can no longer hold it. Now hold it still, until your lungs burn and you feel dizzy, and your chest stings and you feel bad. That's what it was like for about 10 minutes. Every breath was like sucking an entire milkshake through a straw in one go, in less than a second. The tremendous effort on your ribcage makes you sprain all the muscles in your chest, your back, your sides.
Lying down makes things worse, much worse. So does sitting or standing. The only position you can adopt to give you any respite is a crawl stance on all fours, spluttering and wheezing for half an hour, desperately trying to lower your heart rate to control your breathing, but also panicking. What if it never stops? You cant go rummaging around for your inhaler can you? It'll make things worse. you might not find it. Turned out it wasnt in the apartment, it was still in my jacket pocket at the dry cleaners (yeah, the first time I ever had a suit dry cleaned).
Staggering around the place, shirt off, the weight of my tee actually restricting my abdomen even the slightest. hair in my face, eyes closed. Sitting just waiting for it to end, one way or another. Incredible pain, endless, constant, coupled with no oxygen at all. None. You wheeze, then you cough. Each breath such immense effort that you get tired, exhausted, you want to lie down but you cant because doing so stops all breathing period. Then coughing interrupts the breathing for just long enough that you need to suck in a huge gulp, which strains your ribs. A vicious cycle of torment.

Eventually my girlfriend comes in, finds me spread eagle passed out, telephone on the floor off the hook as I had just reached for it to call 999 then collapsed - and rushes me to A and E. I wake up with a tube down my throat propped up in a ward 8 hours later. A nurse comes over and extubates me which is a horrible sensation. But breathing that first conscious breath, freedom in my lungs, airway open. It is a rapturous feeling, ecstatic. Incredible. It's like you had never taken a breath so deep in your entire life. Through your mouth, then your nose. Sitting up, reaching above your head, breathing in. Amazing feeling.

A harsh lesson in responsibility and not taking a serious medical condition as serious as I should have.

Nowadays I am absolutely obsessive about where it is, on my person at all times, a duplicate in a cupboard. The worst suffering I have ever experienced in my life. A persistent state of pain and worry, on the edge of unconsciousness.

And I have been shot with an arrow through my leg. That was nothing by comparison. Protip: Carbon fibre shafts shatter and take five hours of surgery to remove the fragments. what a fucking mess.

I don't understand why you didn't call 911 like a normal person as soon as you couldn't find your inhaler and the situation worsened

Jordyn · October 2008

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

Jordyn wrote: »

so when's he changing back to normal again?

HIYO

At least I was more concise than Backwards Name.

BusterK · October 2008

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

BusterK wrote: »

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

Asthma only happens to weak minded people.

But Asthma can happen to anybody

no just weak minded people

Diagonally?
Pretty sneaky sis

sdrawkcaB emaN · October 2008

Jordyn wrote: »

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

Jordyn wrote: »

so when's he changing back to normal again?

HIYO

At least I was more concise than Backwards Name.

maybe my logorrhea was intentional

for humor

or something

Mr. Henry Bemis · October 2008

backwards is the least concise

sdrawkcaB emaN · October 2008

Mr. Henry Bemis wrote: »

backwards is the least concise

f u

Mr. Henry Bemis · October 2008

manchu

The_Scarab · October 2008

sdrawkcaB emaN wrote: »

I don't understand why you didn't call 911 like a normal person as soon as you couldn't find your inhaler and the situation worsened

Because as mentioned, it escalates very quickly. Lack of oxygen, lack of concentration, confused and panicking. Plus, in the past I've had ones that just pass with time. You keep thinking you can just weather the storm but before you know it you cant breathe, have 20 seconds to make it to the phone and fumble with the keypad before the next thing you know you wake up 8 hours later having passed out.

If my girlfriend hadn't walked in right that second... ugh.

Like I said, I brought it entirely upon myself. Didn't make it any more bearable.

Pony · October 2008

alright dubdub

i am going to sleep now

hopefully i dont die!

if i do i blame orik

Orikaeshigitae · October 2008

:mrgreen:

The_Scarab · October 2008

Orikaeshigitae wrote: »

Orik what's up with your back? Is this general purpose pain or is there some serious condition going on there?
Also, tell me more about this major brain surgery. Consider my curiosity piqued.

Orikaeshigitae · October 2008

oh i fucked up my back about two years ago by lifting a microwave with improper form, pulled it something serious

in ontario, under workplace safety guidelines you are not allowed to lift 70lb+ boxes by yourself - at this job it was a regular occurence because management was retarded

so basically i fucked up my back and kept straining it so it never really got better, and now it is very weak and gets put out pretty easily

one of the reasons i want to get to the gym but am also scared of going to the gym, i like being able to stand and carry things

Tube · October 2008

you will probably find regular deadlifting will solve your back problem

ThatDudeOverThere · October 2008

is it bad that a thread about a horrible medical problem is one of the funniest I've read in a while

Orikaeshigitae · October 2008

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

you will probably find regular deadlifting will solve your back problem

yeah, that's why i'm definitely going once i get in the black again

Tube · October 2008

ThatDudeOverThere wrote: »

is it bad that a thread about a horrible medical problem is one of the funniest I've read in a while

Personally I think I made my post of the year but I am an underappreciated genius.

seizureorbs · October 2008

which one tube

Ranx · October 2008

pony's stroke posting reads like Rorscach

Theidar · October 2008

Damn, this is late but glad you aren't dead and will recover, Pony.

Hylianbunny · October 2008

jesus christ, Pony

what Theidar (and everyone else) said, hope you get better soon.

Goatmon · October 2008

Ranx wrote: »

pony's stroke posting reads like Rorscach

oh God, it does

hahahahah

GoldenSeducer · October 2008

Speedy recovery, Pony.

#pipe · October 2008

Man I was just trimming my beard and got mad shocks off the trimmer when I ran it under the water

So I guess what I'm saying is that I'm a fucking moron

Fallout · October 2008

damn pony

my sympathies

get well soon!

sdrawkcaB emaN · October 2008

#pipe wrote: »

Man I was just trimming my beard and got mad shocks off the trimmer when I ran it under the water

So I guess what I'm saying is that I'm a fucking moron

ahhahhaha wow

hats fucking off pipe

geckonidae · October 2008

yeah another late poster in to say get better quickly pony

woooo

Threadbare Sock · October 2008

Cardboard Tube wrote: »

ThatDudeOverThere wrote: »

is it bad that a thread about a horrible medical problem is one of the funniest I've read in a while

Personally I think I made my post of the year but I am an underappreciated genius.

I appreciate you,, tube

Spoiler:

,

Fallout · October 2008

i think i'm coming down with a throat thing

Penny Arcade

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