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If you donate a Kidney to your wife, then get Divorced. can you take that back?

SmallLadySmallLady Registered User regular
edited January 2009 in Debate and/or Discourse
From the BBC
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7818751.stm
Divorce man 'wants kidney back'


_45359697_kidney_226.jpg Some divorce lawyers say a kidney is not a marital asset to be divided

A US man divorcing his wife is demanding that she return the kidney he donated to her or pay him $1.5m (£1m) in compensation.
Dr Richard Batista told reporters that he decided to go public because he was frustrated at the slow pace of divorce negotiations with his estranged wife.
He said he had not only given his heart to his wife, Dawnell, but donated his kidney to save her life.
But divorce lawyers say a donated organ is not a marital asset to be divided.
Dr Batista married Dawnell in 1990 and donated the kidney to her in 2001. She filed for divorce in 2005 and a settlement has still not been reached.
'Betrayal'
He told reporters at his lawyer's office in Long Island, New York, that going public was a last resort.

o.gifstart_quote_rb.gifI felt humiliated, betrayed, disrespected and disregarded end_quote_rb.gif


Dr Richard Batista

"There is no deeper pain that you can ever express than betrayal from somebody who you love and devoted your life to," he said. He said he had been prevented from seeing their three children for extended periods.
"I felt humiliated, betrayed, disrespected and disregarded for me as a person, as a man, as a husband, as a father."
Dr Batista's lawyer, Dominic Barbara, said his client was "asking for the value of the kidney" that he gave his wife.
A lawyer for Mrs Batista said: "The facts aren't as represented by Dr Batista. We will be addressing the issues before the judge within the next few days."
I"m a little flabbergasted by this new article. How does one give back a kidney?

"we're just doing what smalllady told us to do" - @Heels
SmallLady on
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Posts

  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Man it's totally sexist how if a woman doesn't want a kidney she can just get an abortion but if a man doesn't want a kidney well tough shit for him he has to pay childney support for the next 18 years!

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    They don't expect to get the kidney back. In fact, they don't even really expect to get the money since the government's pretty set on not assigning value to organs. The guy's just trying to get a lot of publicity for the case because he feels he's getting screwed over by his wife in regards to their kids.

    Quid on
  • EchoEcho ski-bap ba-dapModerator mod
    edited January 2009
    Quid wrote: »
    They don't expect to get the kidney back. In fact, they don't even really expect to get the money since the government's pretty set on not assigning value to organs. The guy's just trying to get a lot of publicity for the case because he feels he's getting screwed over by his wife in regards to their kids.

    All I get from this is a feeling of the guy being a petty douchebag.

    Echo on
  • Gnome-InterruptusGnome-Interruptus Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Wow, thats retarded.

    Some things just shouldnt be divided up in divorce court. Just like his ex-wife shouldnt be able to turn around and hand him an 11 year invoice for her personal services as an escort service.

    Gnome-Interruptus on
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    MWO: Adamski
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem Points to 'off' Points to 'on'Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Echo wrote: »
    Quid wrote: »
    They don't expect to get the kidney back. In fact, they don't even really expect to get the money since the government's pretty set on not assigning value to organs. The guy's just trying to get a lot of publicity for the case because he feels he's getting screwed over by his wife in regards to their kids.

    All I get from this is a feeling of the guy being a petty douchebag.
    His wife had him served with divorce papers in the middle of a surgery he was performing.

    :edit: IIRC, they'd been having marital problems, he wanted to save the marriage, and donated the kidney.

    matt has a problem on
    nibXTE7.png
  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Echo wrote: »
    Quid wrote: »
    They don't expect to get the kidney back. In fact, they don't even really expect to get the money since the government's pretty set on not assigning value to organs. The guy's just trying to get a lot of publicity for the case because he feels he's getting screwed over by his wife in regards to their kids.

    All I get from this is a feeling of the guy being a petty douchebag.
    To me it'd depend on how the wife was acting in regards to the divorce. My understanding is that she cheated on him after receiving the kidney, demanded a divorce, and is currently denying him access to their children. Edit: Oh, hey, and the surgery thing.

    So really it seems more like they're both petty douche bags.

    Quid on
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Douchebag marries cuntbucket, results in messy divorce.

    In other news, dog bites man.

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem Points to 'off' Points to 'on'Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Quid wrote: »
    Echo wrote: »
    Quid wrote: »
    They don't expect to get the kidney back. In fact, they don't even really expect to get the money since the government's pretty set on not assigning value to organs. The guy's just trying to get a lot of publicity for the case because he feels he's getting screwed over by his wife in regards to their kids.

    All I get from this is a feeling of the guy being a petty douchebag.
    To me it'd depend on how the wife was acting in regards to the divorce. My understanding is that she cheated on him after receiving the kidney, demanded a divorce, and is currently denying him access to their children. Edit: Oh, hey, and the surgery thing.

    So really it seems more like they're both petty douche bags.
    I don't think I'd call the guy a douche in this situation though, it seems like he tried to work things out amicably and even save the marriage, but it's come down to he has to fight fire with fire.

    matt has a problem on
    nibXTE7.png
  • ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    They're going through a divorce. When people go through something like that, they frequently do very douche-y things to each other. That doesn't necessarily make them douchebags.

    I think he's probably just trying to use this for leverage.

    Thanatos on
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Marriage is such a great institution, isn't it guys?

    The foundation of a stable society.

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I don't think I'd call the guy a douche in this situation though, it seems like he tried to work things out amicably and even save the marriage, but it's come down to he has to fight fire with fire.
    Nah. If he can afford a decent lawyer he shouldn't have trouble getting a court agreement on visitation unless he's some monstrous jack ass or something. Certainly something short of mass publicization of their problems.

    Quid on
  • enlightenedbumenlightenedbum Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    Marriage is such a great institution, isn't it guys?

    The foundation of a stable society.

    Only if the gays can't marry. If they can...chaos!

    enlightenedbum on
    Self-righteousness is incompatible with coalition building.
  • QuidQuid Definitely not a banana Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    Marriage is such a great institution, isn't it guys?

    The foundation of a stable society.
    Fact: Had rad and I both been single I guarantee 38% more liquor would have fallen on your floor.

    Quid on
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited January 2009
    Yeah, this sounds like "woman was a bitch, guy is trying to get even by stupid means" thing.

    And I don't think this is the fault of marriage, it's the fault of people being assholes. We don't whine about how much cars suck because some guy decided to use his to run down the guy he was pissed at.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Yeah, this sounds like "woman was a bitch, guy is trying to get even by stupid means" thing.

    And I don't think this is the fault of marriage, it's the fault of people being assholes. We don't whine about how much cars suck because some guy decided to use his to run down the guy he was pissed at.

    Yeah, I was being mostly flippant.

    Mostly.

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • TomantaTomanta Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    He's not going to get anything because half his organs are legally hers anyway, unless he has a good prenup...

    (come on, someone had to!)

    Tomanta on
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Tomanta wrote: »
    He's not going to get anything because half his organs are legally hers anyway, unless he has a good prenup...

    (come on, someone had to!)

    No just one rib.
    Chris Rock wrote:
    How much for one rib?

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    ElJeffe wrote: »
    Yeah, this sounds like "woman was a bitch, guy is trying to get even by stupid means" thing.

    And I don't think this is the fault of marriage, it's the fault of people being assholes. We don't whine about how much cars suck because some guy decided to use his to run down the guy he was pissed at.

    They mostly come out at night.

    Mostly.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Hee hee.

    I hear that in my head as Cartman, not as the little girl from Aliens.

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • MedopineMedopine __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    Bullshit. He gave it to her as a gift, he doesn't get to claim that value back.

    Medopine on
  • ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Medopine wrote: »
    Bullshit. He gave it to her as a gift, he doesn't get to claim that value back.
    Just like the ring, right?

    Man, leave it to the woman to come in here and totally villainize the guy. Of course, if she were suing to get her virginity back, you'd be ready to knock down the gates for her.
    Kidding, kidding... please don't hurt me, Medo. I'm a bleeder.

    Thanatos on
  • AdrienAdrien Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Dr Batista married Dawnell in 1990 and donated the kidney to her in 2001. She filed for divorce in 2005 and a settlement has still not been reached.
    He said he had been prevented from seeing their three children for extended periods.
    A lawyer for Mrs Batista said: "The facts aren't as represented by Dr Batista. We will be addressing the issues before the judge within the next few days."

    I don't necessarily agree that this is dumb. An act of desperation, maybe.

    Adrien on
    tmkm.jpg
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Bitches get all the breaks in divorce.

    First they want the kids
    Then they want the house
    Then they want their kidneys

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • riposte101riposte101 Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Quid wrote: »
    They don't expect to get the kidney back. In fact, they don't even really expect to get the money since the government's pretty set on not assigning value to organs. The guy's just trying to get a lot of publicity for the case because he feels he's getting screwed over by his wife in regards to their kids.

    That sums it up. I feel for the guy. We don't have all the information, but I would say this guy is getting screwed if he doesn't get to see his children.

    riposte101 on
  • CouscousCouscous Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Is there a "if a partner literally needs something to live, he or she can't get it back after the divorce" rule?

    Couscous on
  • MedopineMedopine __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    Thanatos wrote: »
    Medopine wrote: »
    Bullshit. He gave it to her as a gift, he doesn't get to claim that value back.
    Just like the ring, right?

    Man, leave it to the woman to come in here and totally villainize the guy. Of course, if she were suing to get her virginity back, you'd be ready to knock down the gates for her.
    Kidding, kidding... please don't hurt me, Medo. I'm a bleeder.

    Maybe she should sue to get the value of all those blowjobs repaid

    Medopine on
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem Points to 'off' Points to 'on'Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    She doesn't seem like the type who gives blowjobs to someone she's married to.

    matt has a problem on
    nibXTE7.png
  • CouscousCouscous Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Medopine wrote: »
    Thanatos wrote: »
    Medopine wrote: »
    Bullshit. He gave it to her as a gift, he doesn't get to claim that value back.
    Just like the ring, right?

    Man, leave it to the woman to come in here and totally villainize the guy. Of course, if she were suing to get her virginity back, you'd be ready to knock down the gates for her.
    Kidding, kidding... please don't hurt me, Medo. I'm a bleeder.

    Maybe she should sue to get the value of all those blowjobs repaid

    Ha, wives having sex with their husbands. Good one.

    Couscous on
  • ThanatosThanatos Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Medopine wrote: »
    Thanatos wrote: »
    Medopine wrote: »
    Bullshit. He gave it to her as a gift, he doesn't get to claim that value back.
    Just like the ring, right?

    Man, leave it to the woman to come in here and totally villainize the guy. Of course, if she were suing to get her virginity back, you'd be ready to knock down the gates for her.
    Kidding, kidding... please don't hurt me, Medo. I'm a bleeder.
    Maybe she should sue to get the value of all those blowjobs repaid
    He's a surgeon, I'm sure he can afford to give her $20.

    Thanatos on
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    She doesn't seem like the type who gives blowjobs to someone she's married to.

    Man if he didn't at least negotiate a blowjob in reciprocation for that kidney he's totally pussy-whipped.

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • HonkHonk Honk is this poster. Registered User, __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    Strange fella...

    Honk on
    PSN: Honkalot
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    I mean seriously.

    You give the girl a kidney and when she gets out of the hospital her first trip better be downtown know what I'm sayin?

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    Hee hee.

    I hear that in my head as Cartman, not as the little girl from Aliens.

    And now so do I.

    Which makes it better.

    Is there much left to discuss here? Not in an I'ma-lock-this sense, but... really? Does anyone disagree that the move is some combination of desperation/tit-for-tat/douchery that will go nowhere in court and serve just to sensationalize the issue, and that the woman sounds like she's being a bitch?

    I'm not sure where to go with this, other than lulz.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • matt has a problemmatt has a problem Points to 'off' Points to 'on'Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    I mean seriously.

    You give the girl a kidney and when she gets out of the hospital her first trip better be downtown know what I'm sayin?
    It was, it was just with another guy.

    The story is that their marriage was on the rocks and he thought giving her a kidney and saving her life would help things.

    He was wrong.

    matt has a problem on
    nibXTE7.png
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    I mean seriously.

    You give the girl a kidney and when she gets out of the hospital her first trip better be downtown know what I'm sayin?

    "Fine, I'll give you my organ, but after that I'ma give you my organ, capice?"

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • MedopineMedopine __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    I mean seriously.

    You give the girl a kidney and when she gets out of the hospital her first trip better be downtown know what I'm sayin?
    It was, it was just with another guy.

    The story is that their marriage was on the rocks and he thought giving her a kidney and saving her life would help things.

    He was wrong.

    Yup, too bad for him. Kidney was still a gift, kidney is no longer his, value of kidney can't be reclaimed.

    Medopine on
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    I mean seriously.

    You give the girl a kidney and when she gets out of the hospital her first trip better be downtown know what I'm sayin?
    It was, it was just with another guy.

    The story is that their marriage was on the rocks and he thought giving her a kidney and saving her life would help things.

    He was wrong.

    Let her keep the kidney. What he really needs is

    51hmsPeUDAL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_AA240_SH20_OU01_.jpg

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited January 2009
    Feral wrote: »
    I mean seriously.

    You give the girl a kidney and when she gets out of the hospital her first trip better be downtown know what I'm sayin?
    It was, it was just with another guy.

    The story is that their marriage was on the rocks and he thought giving her a kidney and saving her life would help things.

    He was wrong.

    Incidentally, that makes him an ass and vaguely reminiscent of the creepy Nice Guys who whine about the girls who don't return their affections. "I love you! But, you know, not enough to save your life unless there's something in it for me."

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Yeah. If your relationship is on the rocks, give her a kidney because you're a good person and you don't want to see a human being suffer.

    Don't give her a kidney expecting a romance movie ending.

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
  • YallYall Registered User regular
    edited January 2009
    Given what we know (which is admittedly little) I'm not sure why we are saying the guy is being a douche.

    If we say it's fair for her to request support, how is it not fair for him to receive compensation for donating a kidney?

    Yall on
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