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Fuck Muscle Cramps, this is a Teddy Roosevelt thread

Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worsebefore it gets any better.Registered User regular
edited March 2009 in Social Entropy++
So I just got woken up at 3 in the morning by some of the most excruciating pain i've ever experienced. and then when i tried to straighten my leg i'm pretty sure i pulled my calf muscle. i can barely walk on the fucker.

Metzger Meister on
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Posts

  • BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Yeah, that happens to me sometimes. I suggest eating more bananas.

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
  • MeldingMelding Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    amputate your leg, it is the only way to get the evil out.

    Melding on
  • NuzakNuzak Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    it's clearly guilt pains

    i forgive you, metz

    Nuzak on
  • RobchamRobcham The Rabbit King of your pantsRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    EAT SOME O THAT BAN AN A

    Robcham on
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nuzak wrote: »
    it's clearly guilt pains

    i forgive you, metz

    man i must have murdered and then raped a ton of people for this kinda shit.

    Metzger Meister on
  • Donovan PuppyfuckerDonovan Puppyfucker A dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords in the morningRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    So I just got woken up at 3 in the morning by some of the most excruciating pain i've ever experienced. and then when i tried to straighten my leg i'm pretty sure i pulled my calf muscle. i can barely walk on the fucker.

    Back when I was a teenager (still growing), I used to get woken up all the time by the most extraordinary pains in my legs. Went to a doctor, his explanation was 'growing pains'. His suggested remedy? Wearing football socks to bed to keep my legs warm and to encourage good circulation. I wasn't very happy with that, but it did actually work.

    Donovan Puppyfucker on
  • BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Waking up with a cramping leg is terrible.

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    When I get cramp in my calf I find the best thing to do is to stand up straight right away.

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • L|amaL|ama Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    MikeRyu wrote: »
    When I get cramp in my calf I find the best thing to do is to stand up straight right away.

    I think I would collapse if I tried this with really bad cramp. Massaging it (or going 'ow OW ow OW FUCK' and grabbing it really hard) usually works for me.

    L|ama on
  • BYToadyBYToady Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    L|ama wrote: »
    MikeRyu wrote: »
    When I get cramp in my calf I find the best thing to do is to stand up straight right away.

    I think I would collapse if I tried this with really bad cramp. Massaging it (or going 'ow OW ow OW FUCK' and grabbing it really hard) usually works for me.

    You'd think this, but Mike is right. Standing up gets rid of those cramps a lot faster than rolling on your bed and crying in pain.

    BYToady on
    Battletag BYToady#1454
  • MikeRyuMikeRyu Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    L|ama wrote: »
    MikeRyu wrote: »
    When I get cramp in my calf I find the best thing to do is to stand up straight right away.

    I think I would collapse if I tried this with really bad cramp. Massaging it (or going 'ow OW ow OW FUCK' and grabbing it really hard) usually works for me.

    It seems like the wrong thing to do but it stops the cramp immediately.

    MikeRyu on
    Ranmasig5.png
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    i'm glad i'm alone in the house because the pain was literally bad enough to force a scream out of me. And then I stood up and my vision got all spotty but I forced myself to walk to the kitchen for a drink of water. going from the bed to the standing position was the worst part. then it just hurt from the crazy leg trying to fucking kill me.

    Metzger Meister on
  • Bad-BeatBad-Beat Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Put a banana up your ass.

    Bad-Beat on
  • ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Gotta get some of that Potassium goodness.

    Nah, but that happens to me a lot. Usually, I can just straighten my leg, and it kind of twinges for a minute, then it's good. I've never tried standing up right away and walking, mostly because when I wake up various random parts of my body (like, half my hand and my wrist, or my shoulders) are usually numb, thereby preventing me from getting out of bed.

    Tox on
    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    My leg cramped all the way up while I was stuck in an Obama related traffic jam a few days ago and I still can't walk on it correctly.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    My leg cramped all the way up while I was stuck in an Obama related traffic jam a few days ago and I still can't walk on it correctly.

    Racist

    Wedge Biggs on
    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    What...I don't even....

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    during basic i would wake up in the middle of the night with the worst shin splints i could have ever imagine. i could touch my leg and feel the muscle separating from the bone and my toes would be curling inwards.

    Mister Longbaugh on
  • RobchamRobcham The Rabbit King of your pantsRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    LAAAAAAAAAAAAAACIIIIIIIIIIIIIST

    Robcham on
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Mister Longbaugh on
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    My nipples seem to be dripping.

    ChicoBlue on
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    then you are not a man.

    Mister Longbaugh on
  • Wedge BiggsWedge Biggs Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    What...I don't even....

    An Obama related traffic accident? Like hundreds of Muslim cab drivers were suddenly slowing you down? You really need to be more PC.

    Wedge Biggs on
    I ain't never crossed a man who didn't deserve it. - Artis Ivey Jr.
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    then you are not a man.

    You, sir, just missed a chance to suck my nipples.

    ChicoBlue on
  • ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    Tox on
    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • Metzger MeisterMetzger Meister It Gets Worse before it gets any better.Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    What...I don't even....

    An Obama related traffic accident? Like hundreds of Muslim cab drivers were suddenly slowing you down? You really need to be more PC.

    well to be fair it was the morning call to prayer.

    Metzger Meister on
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    Jam, not accident. He was in Orange County, so everyone from LA felt the need to drive there all at once. Unfortunately, my house is between the two.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Mister Longbaugh on
  • ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    Jam, not accident. He was in Orange County, so everyone from LA felt the need to drive there all at once. Unfortunately, my house is between the two.

    What, is he the new Prophet? Like, wherever he is, is that the new Mecca or something?
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    Tox on
    Twitter! | Dilige, et quod vis fac
  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    How the fuck do I know. I'm the least political person I know.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • BearstranautBearstranaut Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    man when I was younger up until my late teens it would sometimes like feel like the tendon connecting my ass to my leg was trying to contract until it detached. It would leave me on the ground, looking like the hanging man from a tarot card for awhile until I drank some water and screamed for a bit.

    anyways enough about me lets talk about you

    Bearstranaut on
    You ever try and draw Falcor as a giant dong? No? It just ends up looking like a long cyclops.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    Nads wrote: »
    Jam, not accident. He was in Orange County, so everyone from LA felt the need to drive there all at once. Unfortunately, my house is between the two.

    What, is he the new Prophet? Like, wherever he is, is that the new Mecca or something?
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    i was infantry yeah. sand hill's where they train us nowadays.

    Mister Longbaugh on
  • ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    i was infantry yeah. sand hill's where they train us nowadays.

    Really? Damn, they put us through the sand hill. It sucked balls. Actually had some dumbass in my platoon fall in right on top of an ant hill (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country, the sand hill was so named because it was covered in red ant hills). He lasted about 20 sec before he lost his shit in ant bites.

    Of course, never mind they told day ZERO that if they fall in on an ant hill, move away from the fucking ant hill.

    Tox on
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  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country,

    ...

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
  • BearstranautBearstranaut Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    ants are such delightful scamps

    Bearstranaut on
    You ever try and draw Falcor as a giant dong? No? It just ends up looking like a long cyclops.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • Mister LongbaughMister Longbaugh Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Tox wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    and then, in the morning, i would get up and run. up hills. because i am a man

    Where'd you go to basic?

    benning.

    Sandhill? Or were you Infantry?

    i was infantry yeah. sand hill's where they train us nowadays.

    Really? Damn, they put us through the sand hill. It sucked balls. Actually had some dumbass in my platoon fall in right on top of an ant hill (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country, the sand hill was so named because it was covered in red ant hills). He lasted about 20 sec before he lost his shit in ant bites.

    Of course, never mind they told day ZERO that if they fall in on an ant hill, move away from the fucking ant hill.

    those fucking ants are everywhere nowadays. without fail, every time we went out on a field exercise, i would be the asshole who dropped prone right on top of a god damn nest of the things.

    buddy of mine dove into cover right on top of a nest of brown recluses though so i guess it could have been worse

    Mister Longbaugh on
  • ChicoBlueChicoBlue Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Your country smells bad and I wouldn't serve it breakfast.

    ChicoBlue on
  • L|amaL|ama Registered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country,

    ...

    those ants were totally going to launch the first attack of the invasion

    L|ama on
  • ToxTox I kill threads he/himRegistered User regular
    edited March 2009
    Nads wrote: »
    Tox wrote: »
    (NOTE: For those of you who lack the balls to have bravely served our great country,

    ...

    Benning is not only a Basic Combat Training station, but it's also the Infantry School, which means it serves primarily as the United States Army Infantry School and One Station Unit Training Center. All such types of posts that are related to combat arms (Infantry, Artillary, etc) only train male recruits.

    Or, what?

    Tox on
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  • NadsNads Bob Ducca Asleep in a cul-de-sac.Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited March 2009
    I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords.

    Nads on
    3c5d24e9-b7f2-44ba-bbf2-3b4658af70bd.jpg
This discussion has been closed.