I had to explain to some coworkers today why the repeated use of shortening the word decision isn't going to work.
It is being used in this context:
"So, we need to decide who has the D here?"
"No, it's completely clear, he has the D."
"But, what is I want the D instead?"
After explaining why that won't work, especially with anyone younger in the corporation, I proceeded to have to re-explain it to my boss, and my bosses boss.
I'll take Extremely Awkward conversations for $1000 Alex.
Selfish whining in the spoiler because I feel bad but need to put it down somewhere:Spoiler:I wish Mrs. Elbasunu would start to feel like enjoying the bedroom company of Mr. Elbasunu again soon I've done my research and I know this kind of thing can take a long time, not just to physically recover (obviously) but to emotionally return to the equation. Lord knows I'm not going to force any issues, but I was starting to worry maybe she'd lost interest in me because I gained some weight, or something else I was doing, but she said that wasn't the case.
Our son is so great, and she's such a great mom. He's 7 months old next week. I just wish seeing her be an amazing mom didn't also make me super extra attracted to her, because she's not just not in the mood for any of it.
I want to say we could start a club but I'm not fully convinced this particular club would satisfy anything.Spoiler:Just know there are plenty of us in the same boat. Leah is 7.5 months old, wife is super attractive, just not having that mood but once a couple months back.
I am (and was last time) in the opposite boat. From the day Kim finds out she is pregnant, she basically wants no physical contact outside of pecks on the cheek and occasional hand-holding for the entire stretch. She says she just feels "off" and wants to wait out the clock on her own in as many ways as possible.
And you just gotta respect that and give them their space and ride it out by yourself for a stretch. Now, this time next year and still nothing, or if you start getting other negative signs, you might have a therapy-sized problem on your hands. But lots of people will tell you that first year is a very different place to be for moms and they all react very differently to the whole process.
And I guarantee she's being truthful about your weight not being the issue. BUT (and I can tell you this from experience) vigorous exercise and putting effort into your health really does help release pent-up energy, especially sexual energy. If all you're doing is sitting around the house watching TV and handling your own business (and believe me I've been there) you're just going to feel worse about all of it. Put yourself together a simple daily routine (pushups, situps, and squats will take you a long way) and just work through it.
It won't take the place of what you're missing, but you'll feel a LOT less like a coiled snake in your own house all the damn time. Just don't be an idiot in how you present it to her, or you'll fuck stuff up. "I'm doing pushups because all this energy has to go SOMEWHERE," is a really dumb thing to say. "This doesn't have anything to do with you, us, or our bedroom, I just feel like I could tighten up a little and take better care of myself," is a smart thing to say.
This is good advice, thanks. And just to reiterate, I am 100% not being pushy, and definitely giving her space and respect. It's just really difficult to get over the "is there something wrong with me?" brain tricks. I'd love to squeeze in some workouts...but I just don't know when I can do it.
What SAP is and does is the mystery of my life. I had dinner with an SAP developer once and even he could not tell me in private conversation exactly what the fuck SAP does.
As far as I can tell, it's like the software division of IBM. Insert money, eventually receive business software, continue to insert money for the rest of your life to maintain it.
gotta paradigm those key metrics or you'll never immanentize the eschaton