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[PHALLA!] Phalla Arcade

ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
edited October 2007 in Debate and/or Discourse
Session Start (CardboardBox:NeedlepointVampire): Sun Sep 30 15:04:04 2007

[15:04] NeedlepointVampire: Hey.
[15:23] NeedlepointVampire: I said hey. you going to answer me?
[15:24] CardboardBox: Sorry, pr0n called.
[15:24] NeedlepointVampire: I so didn’t need to know that.
[15:30] NeedlepointVampire: Hello?
[15:30] NeedlepointVampire: Are you still fucking whacking it, or what?
[15:31] CardboardBox: Sorry.
[15:31] CardboardBox: What’s up?
[15:31] NeedlepointVampire: You guys still getting all that goatse shit?
[15:32] CardboardBox: Yeah, Phallus Arcade is still Gaping Asshole Central.
[15:32] CardboardBox: How’s stuff at Something Phallic? You guys getting it, too?
[15:32] NeedlepointVampire: Yeah.
[15:32] CardboardBox: Or did you find the guys yet?
[15:32] CardboardBox: Oh. Suck.
[15:33] NeedlepointVampire: Members are dropping like flies. Guys should learn not to fucking come here during work. I guess nobody likes to visit from home, or something.
[15:34] CardboardBox: srsly
[15:34] NeedlepointVampire: At least five people had their works IP block SP this week. We’re running out of regs.
[15:35] CardboardBox: Same here. We lost like seven or eight.
[15:35] CardboardBox: And nobody wants to register, because we have a rep as “
[15:35] CardboardBox: land of the fucking anus” or something.
[15:36] CardboardBox: Fucking weak.
[15:37] NeedlepointVampire: Yeah, I heae ya.
[15:37] NeedlepointVampire: hear ya.
[15:37] NeedlepointVampire: You know, our forum still kicks your forums ass. Even with all the goatse.
[15:45] NeedlepointVampire: PULL UP YOUR GODDAMED PANTS FUCKER
[15:46] CardboardBox: Shut up bitch.
[15:46] CardboardBox: And no it doesn’t. Phallus Arcade is King of the Forums. Something Phallicis a pathetic imitator.
[15:47] NeedlepointVampire: Whatever.
[15:47] NeedlepointVampire: \ / \ / hatever.
[15:48] NeedlepointVampire: Gotta go man. ttyl
[15:49] CardboardBox: Later.
Session Close (NeedlepointVampire): Wed Aug 08 15:13:47 2007

I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
ElJeffe on
«13456725

Posts

  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited September 2007
    Two forums, both alike in dignity, in fair yadda yadda whatever.

    In the dank jungle that is the intarweb, there are two forums. Well, there’re a whole bunch of forums, but only two are worth discussion: Phalla Arcade, and Something Phallic. Both pride themselves on being the best the net has to offer, their forumers the crème de la crème. Both are largely full of self-important yahoos who revel in dick jokes and… well, that’s about it.

    All has been well in the PA and SP communities, until recently. In the past few weeks, there has been a rash of goatse attacks. People have been signing up to the boards, posting photos of weeping man-maw, and then running away giggling. (Or, rather, being banned with great prejudice.) At first it was thought that the menace originated from outside, from the great untamed wilderness of the web, but those running the communities now think differently. They think the perpetrators are insiders, long-time regs who have been wearied by the heavy yoke of same-old-same-old. People who create alts, post dude-ass, and then feign horror with the rest of their forums.

    That the assault has happened simultaneously on both forumers suggests that the perps are working together – a frightening thought indeed. Or maybe just sort of weird, whatever.

    Even more insidious, the goatse’ers’ attacks aren’t limited to the simple posting of goatse. Oh no, these deviants seek to ruin people’s lives, as well, to the extent that impeding the workings of a silly internet forum constitutes “ruining lives”. The fiends have realized that, for whatever reason, people only ever post from work. They have also, then, taken to anonymously emailing the HR departments of forumers’ workplaces about the presence of “inappropriate images” on the forums, with links to the offending sphincter-pics. As such, forumers have had access to their beloved forums blocked. The horror! The humanity! The laughably improbable plot device!

    The staff at each forum has proved laughably inept at rooting out the goatse’ers, and so they have turned to their forumers, asking them who they think might be responsible for this mess. Maybe the proles can succeed where the glorious leaders have failed.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited September 2007
    Welcome to Phalla Arcade!

    The members of Phalla Arcade are a step above the average netizen. At least, that’s what you tell yourselves. You’re not a bunch of dick-joke-loving philistines like those retards at Something Phallic. When you make a dick joke, you try to work in a reference to classical art. PA’s admin is Cardboard Box.

    The membership of Phalla Arcade is posted below.

    You normally have three moderators, but one of them recently became disgusted and left, never to return. Your current moderators are:

    Aldo
    Oboro

    You will need to elect a third moderator; the vote for this will close Monday, Oct. 1st at 8:00pm.


    Rules:

    Each night, you’ll vote for who you wish to be booted from the forum community. Votes for removal should be bolded and red'd. This person will be IP banned from Something Phallic. (In Phalla terms, he dies.)

    When someone is IP banned (ie, dies), or has access blocked by their place of employment (ie, dies), he immediately registers at Something Phallic. You guys may be bitter rivals, but deep down you recognize that you’re two sides of the same juvenile, sex-obsessed coin. In order to be removed from the game, you must be “removed” from both forums. This applies to good guys as well as bad guys.

    Any powers you may have at one forum transfer to the other forum, unless the role description in your PM says otherwise. Powers may only be used against members of your current forum. An analyst at Something Phallic can not use his analyst powers against a member of Phalla Arcade, for example.

    You are encouraged to read the threads corresponding to both forums, but you may ONLY POST IN WHATEVER THREAD CORRESPONDING TO THE FORUM YOU BELONG TO. If you are a Something Phallic member, you may only post in SP. If you’re killed, you may then only post in Phalla Arcade. If you’re killed again, you’re out, and you don’t get to post no more.

    These are the roles and how many of each there are per forum as of now. Except for Moderators, you only get to see the names of the roles, not their powers:

    Plain Ol Forumer (6)
    Big Fish (2)
    Persona Non Grata (2)
    Analyst (2)
    Coworker (4)
    Alt (2)
    Jr. Admin (1)
    Moderator (2)
    Goatse Technician (3)
    Goatse Alt (1)

    About Moderators:
    Moderators are elected by popular vote. On days when there are mod vacancies, each person may vote for one individual to be a mod. Votes should be bolded and limed. Those with the highest vote counts at the close of voting will be made mods the following day. Once you’re a mod, you’re a mod for life; there is no way to remove you, unless you’re banned, blocked, or you willingly resign. The mods collectively have the following powers:

    - Once per night, the mods may decide upon one person to ban. The decision doesn’t have to be unanimous. If there is a tie, the target will be chosen randomly by the admin (that’s me, your gracious host). As long as any one mod selects a target, a mod-ban will occur.

    - The mods may veto the public ban vote. This requires unanimous consensus among current mods. (If there are only two mods unbanned on a current night, only those two need to vote for a veto). There will be no vote-by-proxies on this – all the mods must be around to veto the vote in person, or it doesn’t happen.

    If a mod is banned or blocked on a given night, the vote for his replacement will take place the following day. If a mod resigns, the vote will take place immediately. If a mod resigns 5 minutes before the vote closes, the regs have 5 minutes to vote for a replacement. If no votes for a new mod are made by the close of voting, the vote will occur on the next day, as if the mod had died.

    In the event of a tie vote, the modship is granted randomly to one of the top vote-getters.


    Win Conditions:
    To win, the good guys must eliminate all Goatse Technicians in both forums.

    The Goatse Technicians win if the good guys fail to eliminate them all. If all GTs are eliminated in one forum but not in the other, the GTs win.


    Addendum (this is where rule clarifications will go):

    Voting closes each night at 8:00pm PST.
    The first vote will be Monday, Oct. 1

    Moderators were chosen at random from among all players after roles were given out. The initial moderators may also be specials or bad guys.

    If the moderators successfully veto the ban vote, there will be no banning that night.



    Order of actions:

    - Moderator kills
    - Bad guy kills
    - Vote kills
    - Election results


    This is the text of the default forumer PM, so nobody can use it for verification purposes:
    Plain Ol Forumer
    Something Phallic


    There’s nothing special about you. Half the time, people don’t even remember who the hell you are. You nurse the hope that someday you might become a moderator, because that may serve as a ticket out of obscurity. Plain Ol Forumers get the following powers:

    - You may combine with four other Plain Ol Forumers to form Voltron. Nah, just kidding, you don’t get shit. There’s nothing special about you, remember?

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited September 2007
    Membership:

    The original members of Phalla Arcade are:

    Fluffy
    amtheaznman
    Fuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud
    cheez
    Raakam
    B:L
    Leitner
    FirstComradeStalin
    chamberlain
    FunkyWaltDogg
    Lord Aetos
    Zot

    The members of Phalla Arcade who are rejects from Something Phallic are:

    UnearthlyStew
    GrundlTerror
    durax

    Your mods are currently:

    Raakam

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    (/goes into the forum options, institutes a filter replacing "he" with "she" and "his" with "hers")

    rofl

    dickwad regs where are my dickwad regs

    Oboro on
    words
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited September 2007
    I added an addendum to the rules post.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Obo!

    You! Me! We're going to rule this place! It's going to be so awesome they'll make us mods fo'real!

    Aldo on
  • B:LB:L I've done worse. Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    cocks dicks lol

    /r/ FORM OF THE HEAD

    (srsly don't poast the dancing dong pls)

    B:L on
    10mvrci.png click for Anime chat
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I think I'm just going to ban whoever posts memes.

    Aldo on
  • B:LB:L I've done worse. Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Aldo wrote: »
    I think I'm just going to ban whoever posts memes.
    Wii shouldn't be discriminated just because of our...

    OH SHI-

    (You should ban whoever does the bald/facial expression shit though. :P )

    B:L on
    10mvrci.png click for Anime chat
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I wonder if any of the mods are bad guys. It wouldn't make sense any way. XD

    Aldo on
  • FrosteeyFrosteey Elaise 1521-2945-8940Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Aldo wrote: »
    I wonder if any of the mods are bad guys. It wouldn't make sense any way. XD

    What a great leader who knows not our enemy.

    Frosteey on
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited September 2007
    I would like to point out that I am well aware that large parts of the backstory are completely illogical, and I play fast and loose with things like how the internet actually works.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • evilbobevilbob RADELAIDERegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Hey guys. If someone could figure out the vote closure time in my timezone by the time I wake up that would be awesome.

    evilbob on
    l5sruu1fyatf.jpg

  • Lord_AetosLord_Aetos Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    And so it begins.

    Lord_Aetos on
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Frosteey wrote: »
    Aldo wrote: »
    I wonder if any of the mods are bad guys. It wouldn't make sense any way. XD

    What a great leader who knows not our enemy.

    !ban Frosteey

    Aldo on
  • Fuzzy Cumulonimbus CloudFuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Hey guys!

    Fuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud on
  • FunkyWaltDoggFunkyWaltDogg Columbia, SCRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Well hi there!

    FunkyWaltDogg on
  • OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    guys I'm banning anime tonight ^_^

    Oboro on
    words
  • Fuzzy Cumulonimbus CloudFuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    I am new to the forumz. I like long walks on the beach. Also, puppies!
    I would lyke 2 interst you in how to maek over 20,000 dollerz a week working on ur own!
    It really works, I swear.
    Send this to ten people and your dreams will come true.
    It really works. My wish came tru.
    Wuld u lyke 2 c my LJ?

    Fuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud on
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited September 2007
    I clarified the win conditions for the baddies.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Okay, so hey, as your moderator I feel like I need to play a role in leading this forum to victory. As such, my guesses on what the roles are about:

    Regular Forumers: Vanillagers
    Big Fish: can influence the vote
    Persona non Grata: Vigilante
    Analyst: Seer
    Alt: can survive one ban/vote
    Jr Admin: Guardian
    Coworkers: network.

    Aldo on
  • FrosteeyFrosteey Elaise 1521-2945-8940Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Aldo wrote: »
    Okay, so hey, as your moderator I feel like I need to play a role in leading this forum to victory. As such, my guesses on what the roles are about:

    Regular Forumers: Vanillagers
    Big Fish: can influence the vote
    Persona non Grata: Vigilante
    Analyst: Seer
    Alt: can survive one ban/vote
    Jr Admin: Guardian
    Coworkers: network.

    Good work. You shall find victory and defeat in equal measure.

    Frosteey on
  • Fuzzy Cumulonimbus CloudFuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    So, can mods be evil in secret? Have we determined this yet?

    Fuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud on
  • FrosteeyFrosteey Elaise 1521-2945-8940Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    So, can mods be evil in secret? Have we determined this yet?

    Yes...

    Frosteey on
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Yes, that's possible.

    Aldo on
  • OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    If you accuse us, we will respond by goatseing you

    wait what no

    Oboro on
    words
  • Cold Salmon and HatredCold Salmon and Hatred __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    I want to cry.


    Why did I have to miss the signups! Why couldn't just one more person cancel out

    Cold Salmon and Hatred on
  • LaOsLaOs SaskatoonRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    evilbob wrote: »
    Hey guys. If someone could figure out the vote closure time in my timezone by the time I wake up that would be awesome.

    Lazy-ass.

    What is your timezone?

    LaOs on
  • ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited September 2007
    Oh, also:

    There is to be no direct communication on game-related matters between the two threads. So you guys can't say, "Hey, other thread, should we do this?" or "Hey, you other guys should totally do this" and so on. PMs are okay, but no in-thread communications.

    Roleplaying and idle chatter is okay, so feel free to trash talk or have fun with it.

    ElJeffe on
    I submitted an entry to Lego Ideas, and if 10,000 people support me, it'll be turned into an actual Lego set!If you'd like to see and support my submission, follow this link.
  • AldoAldo Hippo Hooray Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Right, I'm off to bed. I'm going to think about who else is awesome enough to be a mod tomorrow.

    Aldo on
  • Aroused BullAroused Bull Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    So, let's be absolutely, completely clear on this. If we get goatsed by the trolls, we don't actually get goatsed. Right?

    ...Right?

    Aroused Bull on
  • LaOsLaOs SaskatoonRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    One can hope... one can hope.

    LaOs on
  • OboroOboro __BANNED USERS regular
    edited September 2007
    i motion to use my secret mod power to enforce a rule

    we involuntarily recruit haphazard 8)

    Oboro on
    words
  • LaOsLaOs SaskatoonRegistered User regular
    edited September 2007
    That damn avatar of Unearthly Stew's is really fucking me up.

    LaOs on
  • LeitnerLeitner Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    So, Frostee your sarcasm makes you a pretty tempting target to vote for, But I shall resist.

    Anybody got some targets to bandwagon for death modship (I hear Leitner is pretty awesome mod material)?

    Leitner on
  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Sweet, I like puppies too!!!!!!!!

    Look Out it's Sabs! on
    NNID: Sabuiy
    3DS: 2852-6809-9411
  • Fuzzy Cumulonimbus CloudFuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Saburbia wrote: »
    Sweet, I like puppies too!!!!!!!!
    a/s/l?!?!?!?

    Fuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud on
  • Look Out it's Sabs!Look Out it's Sabs! Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Saburbia wrote: »
    Sweet, I like puppies too!!!!!!!!
    a/s/l?!?!?!?

    All of the above. :winky:

    Look Out it's Sabs! on
    NNID: Sabuiy
    3DS: 2852-6809-9411
  • Fuzzy Cumulonimbus CloudFuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    So the other thread has actual plans while we flirt with each other.
    Awesome?
    y or y

    Fuzzy Cumulonimbus Cloud on
  • iamtheaznmaniamtheaznman Registered User regular
    edited September 2007
    Sup all.

    iamtheaznman on
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