It's hairy. A hairy shark! Those are gills.

No dude, it has hairy teeth and hair in it's gills. It's a fucking hairy shark.

Don't be silly, this is a hairy fish: The Hairy Angler (Caulophryne polynema) is an ocean fish, and was first discovered by a BBC film crew while creating the documentary series The Blue Planet. The female is about the size of a football and its body is covered in long antennae, which it uses to detect the movements of any prey nearby. The male is a tenth the size; about the size of a ping pong ball. The Hairy Angler has an expanding stomach so that it is capable of eating other fish bigger than itself — due to the scarcity of passing food. It lives in the dark zone, over 1000 metres (3,300 feet) below the surface of the ocean, so although its skin is red, this will actually render it invisible, as red light does not exist at this depth. Very little is known about the Hairy Angler. It is also worth noting that as it lives at such a great depth, its habitat has yet to be explored properly. Fucker is invisible.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/7087194/ The chimps chewed off most of Davis’ face, tore off his foot and attacked his limbs and genitals. Davis was transported to Loma Linda University Medical Center, where he had surgery late Thursday night. Don't fuck with chimps. Edit: As St. James confronted the chimp, the six-two former running back turned to find a second chimp — also a male, this one older and bigger — bearing down on him as well. With both hands, he pushed the bigger animal. Both chimps pounced. One of the animals grabbed him in a bear hug before chomping into the bone above his right eyebrow. He then stuck his finger in St. James's right eye, gouging it out. The same animal clamped his teeth onto St. James's nose, biting it off, as the other chimp chewed away at St. James's fingers. In the melee, one of the chimps dug in his claws and ripped the skin off the right side of St. James's face, causing it to flop over and cover his left eye, temporarily blinding him. One of the primates sunk his teeth into St. James's skull. He then closed his jaws on St. James's mouth, ripping off his lips and most of his teeth. St. James tried to put one of his hands down the animal's throat, but the chimp just kept chewing on it and chewing on it, and he couldn't get it out. That's horrifying, but the circumstances that led to that attack are straight-up depressing. It's seriously one of the saddest animal stories I've ever read.

I often wonder if deep sea research subs are just going around permanently blinding all these innocent animals by shining giant white spotlights directly at their faces in a place where light generally doesn't even exist in large qualities.

I bought a pack that has Planet Earth and The Blue Planet together for cheap at Amazon - its fucking AMAZING. It blows my mind when theyre like "This is a tuna fish. And we'll go deeper. A deep sea shark! And deeper! This...um, no idea what the fuck this is. The is the first time ANYONE has ever seen this." There's something in that doc called like a sasquach crab or something that has hairy legs. It's not scary and it's awesome.

I often wonder if deep sea research subs are just going around permanently blinding all these innocent animals by shining giant white spotlights directly at their faces in a place where light generally doesn't even exist in large qualities. Do those animals look innocent to you? Best angler fish: [QUOTE]The unusual jaw mechanism and esca of Thaumatichthys has been described as a "living mouse-trap with bait". The premaxillaries on either side of the upper jaw are able to rotate nearly 180° down to trap prey attracted by the luminescent lure; this closing action is effected by large, extremely well-developed upper jaw muscles. Muscles in the illicium allow the esca to be swung forward and backward, so as to better entice prey inside the mouth. The upper jaw mechanism enables prey to be captured without the lower jaw, which can remain moving for the purposes of respiration. QUOTE]Someone explain this to me in English.

I am never going to go near a monkey ever. Ever.

[QUOTE=Couscous;9610906] I often wonder if deep sea research subs are just going around permanently blinding all these innocent animals by shining giant white spotlights directly at their faces in a place where light generally doesn't even exist in large qualities. Do those animals look innocent to you? Best angler fish: The unusual jaw mechanism and esca of Thaumatichthys has been described as a "living mouse-trap with bait". The premaxillaries on either side of the upper jaw are able to rotate nearly 180° down to trap prey attracted by the luminescent lure; this closing action is effected by large, extremely well-developed upper jaw muscles. Muscles in the illicium allow the esca to be swung forward and backward, so as to better entice prey inside the mouth. The upper jaw mechanism enables prey to be captured without the lower jaw, which can remain moving for the purposes of respiration. QUOTE]Someone explain this to me in English. Eesh. I think I saw one of those in the movie version of The Wall.

Is it just me, or did any of you guys think "Hmmm... I wonder how that would taste..." Also, the whole fear of the ocean thing. The sea monster that would make me shit my pants and make my heart explode would be this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkUQt2QWz7s I'd be just swimming along and I dive underneath a few yards and OHHHH FUCK. I know it's a deep sea creature, but when I'm over the ocean on a boat I can't help but think: Something like that is right underneath me.

Giant vagina-fish is NSFW.

Cloverfield made my ocean fear 99% worse. Watching that documentary The Deep Sea, it ended and I was floored by the amount we HAVE NEVER SEEN and know NOTHING about. We're all concerned with the moon and mars, yet we haven't even mastered the ocean floor. If that rock salamander can live 10 years without food, in some deep ocean trench, Cloverfield monster is starting to get a little hungry...

Nature is fuckin' awesome. crocodile icefish: Spoiler: show spoiler hide spoiler Larva: Their blood is transparent because they have no hemoglobin and/or only defunct erythrocytes. Their metabolism relies only on the oxygen dissolved in the liquid blood, which is believed to be absorbed directly through the skin from the water. This works because water can dissolve the most oxygen when it is coldest. Also, their muscles (except the heart muscle) lack myoglobin. These extraordinary properties seem to be an adaptation to the extreme cold of their habitat. (Note that water temperature can drop below 0 °C (the freezing point of freshwater) in the Antarctic sea, but, on the other hand, stays rather constant.) Channichthyidae are the only known vertebrates without hemoglobin. While they don't use hemoglobin anymore, remnants of hemoglobin genes can be found in their genome. For a discussion of the discovery, genetic analysis and evolutionary implications of this condition, see the first chapter of Sean B. Carroll's book The Making of the Fittest.[1] Other photos of adults: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_ovJS1Em-6d...arentFish1.jpg http://billeder-billedbasen.emu.dk/a...E/9E/10880.jpg

That reminds me of these things: It's a glass catfish, and they rule. I have like 3 in my tank, and the hang together. When you feed them, you can see the food in the stomach - every one of the organs is balled up right there behind the head, so he literally will swallow the food, and it travels about a centemeter and sits in the stomach. They're awesome.

I almost forgot. We've discussed chimpanzees and gorillas at length, but I don't think anybody mentioned their cousins, the often neglected and endangered orangutan. Spoiler: show spoiler hide spoiler Spoiler: show spoiler hide spoiler Spoiler: show spoiler hide spoiler

Baby orangutans are so cute.

Another transparent animal - Ghost Shrimp! I bought one of these guys as a feeder for my red claw crabs, but they just left her alone and now she's a permanent feature of the tank.

There is another kind of crustacean called ghost shrimp. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thalassinidea It looks freakier: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...a_deltaura.jpg Thalassinidea is an infraorder of decapod crustaceans that live in burrows in muddy bottoms of the world's oceans. In Australian English, the littoral thalassinidean Trypaea australiensis is referred to as the yabby[1] (a term which also refers to freshwater crayfish of the genus Cherax), frequently used as bait for estuarine fishing; elsewhere, however, they are poorly known, and as such have few vernacular names, "mud lobster" and "ghost shrimp" counting among them.

That ghost shrimp is much better, I'll admit.

Orangutans really do look like a pile of old brown laundry. A pile of laundry that can lift 500 pounds with one hand. This is not an exaggeration. Apparently a female orangutan was seen to do this when angry once, in a zoo. edit: i don't think any strength tests have been performed with gorillas to any precision, but given that there are gorillas that approach ten feet in height if they were to stand up straight, I'm going to guess that their ability to lift is measured in tons. I am willing to guess that an adult male silverback could easily flip over a car or truck. Using judo on a gorilla would not work because their arms are too long. Try shoulder throwing something with an arm that's five feet long. Besides this, they weigh four hundred pounds. You can try to lever them over your hip, but all they have to do is lift their arm. Their mass gives them automatic leverage. Martial arts grappling works because it allows humans to use the enemy's body and their own as leverage, giving them superiority. A gorilla's standard leverage based on mass, combined with their strength, makes that completely useless. That and they could easily bite you to death, or bearhug you or grab your head and crush it exactly as easily as I would crush a bird's.

Sharks are pretty awesome. Always thought they were badass since they've outlasted the dinosaurs.

Nature is fuckin' awesome. crocodile icefish: Spoiler: show spoiler hide spoiler Larva: That looks fantastic and bizare. Very cool.

They got wussier over the years. However, in 1996, three shark experts, Michael D. Gottfried, Leonard J. V. Compagno and S. Curtis Bowman, questioned the reliability of Randall's method. According to them, shark's tooth enamel height does not necessarily increase in proportion with the animal's total length.[7] Gottfried and his co-workers tried to solve this issue by means of conducting new research and analysis to create a method for measuring the size of large sharks (including C. megalodon) with much greater accuracy, which was published in 1996. The proposed method is: "Megatooth's" Total Length in meters = [− (0.22) + (0.096) × (Slant height of tooth in [mm])].[7] Using this new method, the maximum size of megalodon was calculated to be 15.9 metres (52 ft) with a body mass of about 47 metric tons (52 short tons).[7] But this calculation was based on a 168 mm (6⅝ inch) long upper anterior tooth, which was the biggest tooth in the possession of this team at the time.[7] Since then, even larger C. megalodon teeth have been excavated which indicate that the shark could grow to more than 17 metres (56 ft).[13] Shark researcher Cliff Jeremiah also has suggested a method to determine the size of the large sharks, including C. megalodon,[1] and his method is considered to be among the most reliable.[1] He suggested that the jaw perimeter of a shark is directly proportional to its total length, with the width of the roots of the largest teeth being a proxy for estimating jaw perimeter. For every centimeter of root width of the largest tooth, he asserts, there was approximately 4.5 feet of the shark. He concluded that C. megalodon could grow up to 18.2 metres (60 ft),[1] with a body mass of about 70 metric tons (77 short tons). Many scientists acknowledge that C. megalodon could grow to more than 18 metres (59 ft).[1][14] Interestingly, a C. megalodon jaw has been reconstructed by a shark researcher, Vito Bertucci, in 1999 which is now recognized as the largest modern reconstruction in the world and indicates a length of over 23 metres (75 ft).[15] Hence, from the research of several scientists, it is clear that C. megalodon is the largest shark that has ever lived and is among the largest fishes known to have existed.[7] Size of mouth: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...lodon_jaws.jpg Reconstructed Megalodon jaws on display at the National Aquarium, Napier, New Zealand. The man in the picture is 5'10"/1.78m

Megalodon's name will always be tainted in my mind due to having watched Shark Attack 3: Megalodon. Easily one of the worst movies I have ever seen.

Trajectory of the animal thread: D'awwww cute --> Holy god undersea terror --> Man vs. Beast in a steel cage match.