Sympathy card

Talka

A family friend (my age) passed away a few days ago, and I'm under orders from my mom to send a sympathy card to the parents. I've never sent one before, so I'm not really sure of the etiquette on these kind of things. Is it rude/improper to send it on a Hallmark card from the sympathy section? Google says I should use personal letterhead, but I'm 21 years old and don't have any of that. Also, what sorts of things should I write? I knew the girl pretty well but not her parents. Not really sure what I can say, and anything I try to write sounds more pretentious than heartfelt.

Elin

Get pen and paper and write them a short letter. Tell them about how you knew their daughter and how she will be missed. Express sympathy for their loss.

Talka

Regular 8.5x11 paper is fine?

VisionOfClarity

You can send a card and add a personal note. When my father passed most of the cards we received were like this.

Chanus

Anything is fine... this is definitely an "It's the thought that counts" thing.

Tell a short story (a few paragraphs tops) about their daughter that means something to you.

Enc

Well, obviously you don't want to use crinkled up notepaper. But the idea here is not the paper. Her parents are not going to look down at your letter and judge the quality of your wax seal or the weight of your vellum.

Type up a nice letter talking about their daughter. They want to know about her, they want to be reminded about how she lived. Be kind and honest, and maybe send in an appropriate picture of her and her friends, if you have one in a parent-friendly group setting.

It's a hard thing to do, but it means a lot.

Sir Headless VII

Don't worry that much about it. The parents will probably get lots of cards like your and if yours isn't that good it will just blend in with the rest. If you get a hallmark card and add personal note to it you will be golden (you would be fine with a hallmark card and a couple of lines written in there).

Asiina

Sorry to hear about your friend.

Just get either a blank card or a generic sympathy one. It's just the medium to write the note, which is more important.

You don't necessarily have to focus on her death, but you can write something about her that you two shared. An interest, time you spent together, etc. Knowing specifically what she meant to other people will be something nice for them to see.

Passerbye

Sorry to hear about your loss. It sucks.

I recently went through this with a friend of mine. A short letter on how you knew their daughter (anecdotes help here) and how you're sorry for their loss tucked into a nice 'sympathy for your loss' Hallmark card should be sufficient. Just be honest in your language, don't worry about sounding fancy, and you'll be fine.

Corvus

VisionOfClarity wrote: »

You can send a card and add a personal note. When my father passed most of the cards we received were like this.

Yeah, this.