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Help with a fucking stubborn friend
Foolish Chaos
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
So here is the deal. At like 8pm last night I get a call from my friend. He says that his mom freaked out and kicked him out. In the middle of the phone call, he hangs up. About 15 minutes later, he calls me back and says that his mom tried to pick him up, told him to go home. He didn't think it was a good idea.
This shit went on for a bit longer until I just went down to pick him up. For a bit of background, we both graduated high school last year and are attending community college. I live with my parents, and they were fine with him staying for a night or two while he works things out. He doesn't drive.
So I figured it was just some minor squabble, and it seems like it was just that. She freaked out over some minor thing, over reacted and told him to get out. But here is where shit gets kind of crazy. First off, he tells me that he might have other friends he could live with for awhile. I say, okay who? Turns out they are some people he met on the internet. One lives about 30 minutes away, while the other lives in another state. While he is staying over, his mom calls him a couple of times, apparently in tears. He tells me it is probably because she hates loosing control over him. /facepalm
His same state friend backed out, and now only the out of state person is left. And she seems okay with it. I can't even get him to stay with his mom and work this shit out over the weekend (has to wait till monday before he can get what he needs to leave). Even if it would make it easier for everyone, he wont do it.
But I'm not trying to pretend like I understand their relationship. He never seemed to like her for whatever reason. But this all just seems like its being blown WAY out of proportion. I am trying to tell him that he should continue college in his relatively stable environment, but he keeps telling me that he "can always go back". Which is kind of bullshit if he now has to worry about living conditions, a job, getting a car, etc.
I don't know, am I out of line here? Really unsure about how to handle this, or if I should do anything at all.
/drama
This shit went on for a bit longer until I just went down to pick him up. For a bit of background, we both graduated high school last year and are attending community college. I live with my parents, and they were fine with him staying for a night or two while he works things out. He doesn't drive.
So I figured it was just some minor squabble, and it seems like it was just that. She freaked out over some minor thing, over reacted and told him to get out. But here is where shit gets kind of crazy. First off, he tells me that he might have other friends he could live with for awhile. I say, okay who? Turns out they are some people he met on the internet. One lives about 30 minutes away, while the other lives in another state. While he is staying over, his mom calls him a couple of times, apparently in tears. He tells me it is probably because she hates loosing control over him. /facepalm
His same state friend backed out, and now only the out of state person is left. And she seems okay with it. I can't even get him to stay with his mom and work this shit out over the weekend (has to wait till monday before he can get what he needs to leave). Even if it would make it easier for everyone, he wont do it.
But I'm not trying to pretend like I understand their relationship. He never seemed to like her for whatever reason. But this all just seems like its being blown WAY out of proportion. I am trying to tell him that he should continue college in his relatively stable environment, but he keeps telling me that he "can always go back". Which is kind of bullshit if he now has to worry about living conditions, a job, getting a car, etc.
I don't know, am I out of line here? Really unsure about how to handle this, or if I should do anything at all.
/drama
Foolish Chaos on
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Isn't that totally irrational? Hes not even sure if he wants to tell her where he is going.
But the end result is, if he refuses to go back and live with his mom, and you aren't offering him room and board, you really have absolutely no say in the matter.
Of course he might have put more thought into this than he is letting on, though it all seems like he is making these decisions on the fly.
edit: I mean I've been in touch with him for the last couple of weeks nearly every day (thanks to Borderlands) and he seemed fine, then 30 minutes after a play session I get the call.
However, it's still his life. You can try to figure out what is going on so you can give him good advice, but you'll never be able to make the decisions and so, you aren't responsible for him, or the way his life turns out. That's the way advice is. You can give it all you want, but they are free to leave or take it.
there's nothing really wrong with this until you find out he's living on the streets rather than going back home because he has parent issues
That is basically what I am assuming by this point. Either that or the fight was a little bit different when he described. When I mentioned that my parents wanted his moms number, he was not pleased... He said that maybe he should go back home and try and get his things, and stay there for the weekend depending on how their conversation went.
But yeah, I'm just going to take what you guys said here and not make it so much my problem, cause it really isn't.
edit: And then his mom stops by tonight.... Jesus. I've had enough drama these past two days to last me a lifetime.