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Im a dad!

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    mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    just think, you were all like that once

    there was a point in time where yiffing hentai robots weren't even a part of your world

    mrpaku on
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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    EDIT: That made no sense, nevermind. :P

    Sheri on
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    TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    ZeroZero wrote:
    ZeroZero wrote:
    Normandy is a black person name.
    I didn't know that Scandinavian people were black.
    No see. Like black people name their kids crazy things. It's an SNL skit and it's on family guy where they make fun of the one show and the mom's name is Florida, and she starts lamenting that she is named after a state. Nameing a kid Normandy would be kind of the same thing.
    That was Family Guy. Also you're totally missing the point. My kids will be able to beat up your kids.
    That's it.

    I'm going with kantankeris's advice.

    My first son will be named "Motherfucking Bazooka".

    FINALLY someone finally gets it.
    [spoiler:fd45abb97c]the woman in Children of Men was going to name her daughter "Bazooka" for awhile until the end of the movie where she changes h er mind.[/spoiler:fd45abb97c]

    TankHammer on
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    uc4lifeuc4life Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    uc4life wrote:
    Pic

    :(

    I was hoping for some cyborg-like infant.

    I mean, I guess a normal fleshbag is good, too, but, yanno... mecha-baby. :(

    babyborg.jpg

    cant believe i just did this

    uc4life on
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    RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited January 2007
    That's it.

    I'm going with kantankeris's advice.

    My first son will be named "Motherfucking Bazooka".

    FINALLY someone finally gets it.
    [spoiler:62da622128]the woman in Children of Men was going to name her daughter "Bazooka" for awhile until the end of the movie where she changes h er mind.[/spoiler:62da622128]

    for serious?

    man, here I was thinking that Bazooka would be a badass name.

    And then I remembered Bazooka Joe.

    And his shitty gum and comics.

    You guys think Glock Swanson is a good name?

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
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    sundayssundays Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    sundays on
    siggerdigger.gif
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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    FINALLY someone finally gets it.
    [spoiler:4ac181b511]the woman in Children of Men was going to name her daughter "Bazooka" for awhile until the end of the movie where she changes h er mind.[/spoiler:4ac181b511]

    Oh man, people spoilering things without any non-spoilered indication of what they're spoilering defeat the purpose of spoilering at all, cuz I'm gonna highlight it because I don't know what it's about, then BAM, Children of Men spoiler'd.

    (not that it was a real spoiler you posted. It's just that people do that a lot and I'm all like, 'but I didn't know!')

    Sheri on
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    naporeon wrote:
    Raneados wrote:
    2) His name is john but you're going to call him jack? WHat's up with that?
    Jack has been a familiar for the name John for ages. In fact, it wasn't even a given name until fairly recently; before then, it was exclusively applied to Johns and other J names, like Jacob. Haven't you ever heard anyone call JFK, "Jack Kennedy"?

    The John/Jack thing is even the subject of part of one of my favorite plays, The Importance of Being Earnest.
    Gwendolen wrote:
    "Jack?... No, there is very little music in the name Jack, if any at all, indeed. It does not thrill. It produces absolutely no vibrations... I have known several Jacks, and they all, without exception, were more than usually plain. Besides, Jack is a notorious domesticity for John! And I pity any woman who is married to a man called John. She would probably never be allowed to know the entrancing pleasure of a single moment’s solitude."
    Anyhow, congrats, OP! That's a big baby, for being five weeks early!

    I learned this from a Daffy Duck Cartoon.


    "Alias John, alias Johnny, alias Jack, alias Jackie!?"

    I was quick enough to put two and two together.

    sarukun on
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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    Make her go on a date before she figures out her sexual preference.

    Five seems like a good age.

    Sheri on
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    MendozaMendoza Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    he looks like a cat

    Mendoza on
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    TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    That's it.

    I'm going with kantankeris's advice.

    My first son will be named "Motherfucking Bazooka".

    FINALLY someone finally gets it.
    [spoiler:ec7b979b9d]the woman in Children of Men was going to name her daughter "Bazooka" for awhile until the end of the movie where she changes h er mind.[/spoiler:ec7b979b9d]

    for serious?

    man, here I was thinking that Bazooka would be a badass name.

    And then I remembered Bazooka Joe.

    And his shitty gum and comics.

    You guys think Glock Swanson is a good name?
    Sounds too much like Brock Sampson.
    EDIT: And at the same time not enough like Brock Sampson.

    TankHammer on
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    mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    lesbian porn would be ruined pretty much forever

    mrpaku on
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    sarukun wrote:
    I got my girlfriend to agree that were we to marry and have kids, our first girl would be named "Normandy". She said no to calling the boy child "Anzio" though, but that would be a totally fucking awesome name.

    Anzio Ricciardelli. Fuck yeah! I'm going to push for that to be his middle name if this ever happens.

    [spoiler:a71ceb52f0]Normandy and Anzio are two amphibious assaults from World War II. One in France, the other in Italy.[/spoiler:a71ceb52f0]

    Why would you name your child after two of the localities in which transpiered some of the bloodiest and savage losses of life in human history?

    Edit: tense and ambiguation
    I don't understand your question. It's like "why would you give your child an incredibly powerful name in honor of an action leading to the defeat of the greatest evil force of the 20th century? Yeah man, I should have gone with Bob after that guy, y'know, from accounting.

    Original names are where it's at man. Jack is generic to the point of being associated with action heroes, and I respect that. I have a different approach.

    EDIT: I have to correct myself, gf wants to spell it "Normandi" and I guess I'm okay with that.

    I prefer to think of it as a tragic loss of life in the name of the greater good, you prefer to think of it as a triumphant march against evil.


    Potato Potato. I'd sooner go with something a little more metaphysical.

    sarukun on
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    MarathonMarathon Registered User regular
    edited January 2007

    You guys think Glock Swanson is a good name?

    Everyone would just call him Cock.

    Marathon on
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    GantZGantZ Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sheri wrote:
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    Make her go on a date before she figures out her sexual preference.

    Five seems like a good age.

    Introduce her to cock at the youngest age possible.

    GantZ on
    powah.jpg
    Redeemer wrote:
    GantZ, cock now.
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    Raijin QuickfootRaijin Quickfoot I'm your Huckleberry YOU'RE NO DAISYRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited January 2007
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    That whole "Guys can't hit girls" thing doesn't apply to butch dykes.

    Raijin Quickfoot on
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    DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    "Cool" names for your kids are stupid and just make them look like they are dorks with dorky, borderline-abusive parents. You wanna use those "cool" names? Put them on your dog. Rotties named "Panzer" do not raise an eyebrow. Children named "Panzer" do.

    Unless it's a boy and you're naming him Sue. And you're Johnny Cash.

    Defender on
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    mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Defender wrote:
    "Cool" names for your kids are stupid and just make them look like they are dorks with dorky, borderline-abusive parents. You wanna use those "cool" names? Put them on your dog. Rotties named "Panzer" do not raise an eyebrow. Children named "Panzer" do.

    Unless it's a boy and you're naming him Sue. And you're Johnny Cash.

    Thanks, Dick.

    mrpaku on
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    sundayssundays Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sheri wrote:
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    Make her go on a date before she figures out her sexual preference.

    Five seems like a good age.

    but that's before the kids learn shame

    daughter having sex for the first time
    me, running up in the room, wailing
    all tears and semen, everywhere

    how could you do this to your father, Claire

    sundays on
    siggerdigger.gif
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    SheriSheri Resident Fluffer My Living RoomRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Defender wrote:
    "Cool" names for your kids are stupid and just make them look like they are dorks with dorky, borderline-abusive parents. You wanna use those "cool" names? Put them on your dog. Rotties named "Panzer" do not raise an eyebrow. Children named "Panzer" do.

    Unless it's a boy and you're naming him Sue. And you're Johnny Cash.

    Dorky, definitely. Borderline abusive? I dunno about that, duder.

    Sheri on
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    sarukunsarukun RIESLING OCEANRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    uc4life wrote:
    uc4life wrote:
    Pic

    :(

    I was hoping for some cyborg-like infant.

    I mean, I guess a normal fleshbag is good, too, but, yanno... mecha-baby. :(

    babyborg.jpg

    cant believe i just did this

    This needs to go in your child's baby book.


    It must.

    sarukun on
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    sundays wrote:
    Sheri wrote:
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    Make her go on a date before she figures out her sexual preference.

    Five seems like a good age.

    but that's before the kids learn shame

    daughter having sex for the first time
    me, running up in the room, wailing
    all tears and semen, everywhere

    how could you do this to your father, Claire
    ahahaha
    Goddamnit Jad, come back more often

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I knew a girl named Jack once.

    She was pretty fucking awesome.

    Callius on
    tonksigblack.png
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    SeñorAmorSeñorAmor !!! Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    uc4life wrote:
    uc4life wrote:
    Pic

    :(

    I was hoping for some cyborg-like infant.

    I mean, I guess a normal fleshbag is good, too, but, yanno... mecha-baby. :(

    babyborg.jpg

    cant believe i just did this

    Better, but no leg enhancements? Baby Jack weeps from his stainless steel tear ducts.

    SeñorAmor on
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    DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Sheri wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    "Cool" names for your kids are stupid and just make them look like they are dorks with dorky, borderline-abusive parents. You wanna use those "cool" names? Put them on your dog. Rotties named "Panzer" do not raise an eyebrow. Children named "Panzer" do.

    Unless it's a boy and you're naming him Sue. And you're Johnny Cash.

    Dorky, definitely. Borderline abusive? I dunno about that, duder.

    You know, like, psychological abuse. Naming a boy "Darthmaul" because you are a pathetic dork basically invites him to have no friends. It's far worse than an ordinary name like Reginald ("Reggie" is OK) or Julian (people will just assume he's gay, but at least "Jules" seems less gay).

    Defender on
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    RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited January 2007
    Defender's birth name is Sideburns.

    It sounded like a good idea at the time, but man what were they thinking?

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
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    CalebrosCalebros a k a TimesNewPwnin Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Defender wrote:
    Sheri wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    "Cool" names for your kids are stupid and just make them look like they are dorks with dorky, borderline-abusive parents. You wanna use those "cool" names? Put them on your dog. Rotties named "Panzer" do not raise an eyebrow. Children named "Panzer" do.

    Unless it's a boy and you're naming him Sue. And you're Johnny Cash.

    Dorky, definitely. Borderline abusive? I dunno about that, duder.

    You know, like, psychological abuse. Naming a boy "Darthmaul" because you are a pathetic dork basically invites him to have no friends. It's far worse than an ordinary name like Reginald ("Reggie" is OK) or Julian (people will just assume he's gay, but at least "Jules" seems less gay).

    what about the name Beef

    it is not nerdy

    the kid would grow up being the most manly and popular of all the school kids

    Calebros on
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    sundayssundays Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    sundays wrote:
    Sheri wrote:
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    Make her go on a date before she figures out her sexual preference.

    Five seems like a good age.

    but that's before the kids learn shame

    daughter having sex for the first time
    me, running up in the room, wailing
    all tears and semen, everywhere

    how could you do this to your father, Claire
    ahahaha
    Goddamnit Jad, come back more often

    i am actually here a lot, it's just that i post not

    but you are being watched

    sundays on
    siggerdigger.gif
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    LarlarLarlar consecutive normal brunches Moderator, ClubPA Mod Emeritus
    edited January 2007
    I've always liked Seph as a boy's name. It's cool and unique and isn't borderline abusive. Plus it has a tinge of FFVII that most people won't ever pick up on anyway.

    Larlar on
    iwantanswers3.png
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    DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Defender's birth name is Sideburns.

    It sounded like a good idea at the time, but man what were they thinking?

    My birth name is Muttonchops Landingstrip McFumanchu. Named after styles of pubescent hair.

    Defender on
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Defender's birth name is Sideburns.

    It sounded like a good idea at the time, but man what were they thinking?

    His mom was on so much smack that 'ole Sideburns here just slid out her slacked cunt.

    Callius on
    tonksigblack.png
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    DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited January 2007
    uc4life wrote:
    Dynagrip wrote:
    Stay the fuck inside and just post your stupid cat macros. You are now in like the danger zone for ironic deathland. Careful!

    Ill try, only 14 hours till my flight....wait did you just give me approval to post kitties? Ill do it somewhere else, dont want to sully my son's thread.
    Wear like 2 parachutes on the plane, just in case. srsly.l

    Dynagrip on
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    KnobKnob TURN THE BEAT BACK InternetModerator Mod Emeritus
    edited January 2007
    woooo congrats!

    babies are awesome

    Knob on
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    MarathonMarathon Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Larlar wrote:
    I've always liked Seph as a boy's name. It's cool and unique and isn't borderline abusive. Plus it has a tinge of FFVII that most people won't ever pick up on anyway.

    Probably for the best on account that it's totally gay.

    Marathon on
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    scarlet st.scarlet st. Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    sundays wrote:
    sundays wrote:
    Sheri wrote:
    sundays wrote:
    i think maybe i just want to be able to harrass her first boyfriend and her being lesbian will ruin that for me

    Make her go on a date before she figures out her sexual preference.

    Five seems like a good age.

    but that's before the kids learn shame

    daughter having sex for the first time
    me, running up in the room, wailing
    all tears and semen, everywhere

    how could you do this to your father, Claire
    ahahaha
    Goddamnit Jad, come back more often

    i am actually here a lot, it's just that i post not

    but you are being watched
    >.>

    scarlet st. on
    japsig.jpg
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    mrpakumrpaku Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    if you name a kid beef, you are basically daring god to make him five-six and like 110 lbs

    mrpaku on
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    RankenphileRankenphile Passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood.Registered User, Moderator Mod Emeritus
    edited January 2007
    Defender wrote:
    Defender's birth name is Sideburns.

    It sounded like a good idea at the time, but man what were they thinking?

    My birth name is Muttonchops Landingstrip McFumanchu. Named after styles of pubescent hair.

    Mutton is kind of a cool name.

    Also, some couple once named their kid Asheron.

    I mean, sure they call him Ash, which is a cool name, but god damn it this is why geeks shouldn't breed.

    Rankenphile on
    8406wWN.png
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    DefenderDefender Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Calebros wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    Sheri wrote:
    Defender wrote:
    "Cool" names for your kids are stupid and just make them look like they are dorks with dorky, borderline-abusive parents. You wanna use those "cool" names? Put them on your dog. Rotties named "Panzer" do not raise an eyebrow. Children named "Panzer" do.

    Unless it's a boy and you're naming him Sue. And you're Johnny Cash.

    Dorky, definitely. Borderline abusive? I dunno about that, duder.

    You know, like, psychological abuse. Naming a boy "Darthmaul" because you are a pathetic dork basically invites him to have no friends. It's far worse than an ordinary name like Reginald ("Reggie" is OK) or Julian (people will just assume he's gay, but at least "Jules" seems less gay).

    what about the name Beef

    it is not nerdy

    the kid would grow up being the most manly and popular of all the school kids

    Well, two things:

    1) The kid better be big and male, and not like Roast Beef from Achewood.

    2) If the kid is big and male, you know what? He might get "beef" as a nickname. Forcing nicknames is super-lame.

    Defender on
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    TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I remember reading EGM one time during my teenage years and there was a letter talking about how a nerd and his nerd-wife named their daughter Rinoa after the Final Fantasy VIII character. I shared this story years later with the girlfriend and she loved the name and I had to explain to her that, no, it was not a good name because of the horrible implications it would put on us.
    She has not played nor seen Final Fantasy so I guess I understand how she wouldn't realize what she was saying.


    women.

    TankHammer on
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    CalliusCallius Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Knob made his child's middle name "Danger."

    I'm sorry, but that's FUCKING AWESOME.

    Callius on
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