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[Legal Help] Cremation remains
FrostyAlphaWolf
Registered User regular
Registered User regular
I'll try and get just the basics in here, but it's still going to be a little long.
Early in November of last year (2009) my uncle took his life for his own reasons, one of which involved the problems he was having with a pretty nasty divorce. He lived in California, while the rest of my family lives here in North Carolina. After it happened, we made it our main goal to get his remains brought back to us in any form so we could give him a proper service. However, his ex-wife (and obviously ex-aunt) has refused to give us any information about what she has done with his body; there are a variety of situations going on there, but the main one is that she wants money from us (the family).
We have contact with several close friends of my uncle, including the sheriff, as well as the mortuary he was supposedly sent to, but the ex-wife won't give anyone any answers about what has happened to the remains. Supposedly he was sent to the mortuary to be cremated, but there's no way of knowing that's true since we only heard it from the ex-wife, and with the way she's been acting there's no reason to believe anything she has said so far.
From checking Google, all I could find about this situation is that remains are to be kept for 60 days, but disposed of afterward. The plan is to contact the mortuary and ask them if the ex-wife won't pick up the remains in time then they might let us have them since we're his family. However, since we're not even sure he's been through that process yet, we don't even have a time frame to go by.
The only official news we have concerning a service was a local announcement for a memorial in California, but several people we know that went said she didn't have any kind of ashes or remains with her, so the mystery remains. Basically what I wanted to know was if there is any kind of legal action we can take to have him brought back home, something about how family has precedence over spouses maybe. We're not looking to create any kind of trouble with the ex-wife (she's made plenty so far), the only concern we have is getting my uncle back for a proper burial and service.
tl;dr: Ex-aunt won't give up uncle's remains to family, curious if any legal action can be taken.
Early in November of last year (2009) my uncle took his life for his own reasons, one of which involved the problems he was having with a pretty nasty divorce. He lived in California, while the rest of my family lives here in North Carolina. After it happened, we made it our main goal to get his remains brought back to us in any form so we could give him a proper service. However, his ex-wife (and obviously ex-aunt) has refused to give us any information about what she has done with his body; there are a variety of situations going on there, but the main one is that she wants money from us (the family).
We have contact with several close friends of my uncle, including the sheriff, as well as the mortuary he was supposedly sent to, but the ex-wife won't give anyone any answers about what has happened to the remains. Supposedly he was sent to the mortuary to be cremated, but there's no way of knowing that's true since we only heard it from the ex-wife, and with the way she's been acting there's no reason to believe anything she has said so far.
From checking Google, all I could find about this situation is that remains are to be kept for 60 days, but disposed of afterward. The plan is to contact the mortuary and ask them if the ex-wife won't pick up the remains in time then they might let us have them since we're his family. However, since we're not even sure he's been through that process yet, we don't even have a time frame to go by.
The only official news we have concerning a service was a local announcement for a memorial in California, but several people we know that went said she didn't have any kind of ashes or remains with her, so the mystery remains. Basically what I wanted to know was if there is any kind of legal action we can take to have him brought back home, something about how family has precedence over spouses maybe. We're not looking to create any kind of trouble with the ex-wife (she's made plenty so far), the only concern we have is getting my uncle back for a proper burial and service.
tl;dr: Ex-aunt won't give up uncle's remains to family, curious if any legal action can be taken.
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FrostyAlphaWolf on
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I think this might depend on who is the administrator or executor of your uncle's estate. If his ex-wife was appointed to this position in his will, or if she got the position in any other way, then she's probably in charge of disposing of the body, and there may not be much you can do.
If you're serious about trying to get the remains, you'll need a lawyer and your late uncle's will, if he had one.
First off, my condolences for your loss.
Second off, I advise you contact a real lawyer.
Looking at some quick caselaw in both NC and CA, a person cannot claim a property right to a dead body, but generally can claim a quasi property right as to the body's possession and disposition--all this really means is that you aren't exactly arguing to "own the body" but rather to "have a right to the body for the sake of giving a proper burial" which appears to be what you want anyways.
Both NC and CA appear to recognize a claim to possess a dead body for purposes of burial arising from a spouse or next of kin. From what I have quickly gathered, it appears you have a valid course of action, but it might be up to a court to determine whether you or one of your family members has a stronger claim than the ex-wife.
Were your aunt and uncle entirely divorced? I would guess the more separated the two were, the better claim you will have as next of kin over a spouse--but a lawyer with experience in these matters will much better equipped to know how these things often turn out. It would also appear that time is important in this matter, and getting someone who knows the ins and outs of these tricky situations might be useful as they might know who to call or what to do to make sure your family's wishes are fufilled before something happens.