When you're pushed, [CHATTING] is as easy as breathing

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Posts

  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    It's really more of a dinghy....and the donkies are dead. The psychological issues post donkey sex were a little more traumatic than initially anticipated.

    Mustang on
  • BuckwolfeBuckwolfe Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Mustang wrote: »
    Mustang wrote: »
    You're so fucking negative, you always see the problems and never the opportunities.
    You say why, and I say why not.

    Well...because you'd have to have sex with a donkey, is the obvious answer.

    I'll think about my response while your huddled over your sketch pad and I'm having sex with donkies on my yacht in the carribean.

    So what you're saying is that you would voluntarily continue to have sex with donkeys, or at least have sex with more than one donkey?

    Also, is the yacht part of the deal, or do you have to buy one with part of the million dollars?

    I'd also ask whether or not the million dollars is taxed. Is it like, a donation, or does the state take a big chunk of change out of it?

    Maybe its just me, but when it comes to bestiality I think all bases and conditions should be thoroughly covered...

    Buckwolfe on
  • Angel_of_BaconAngel_of_Bacon Moderator mod
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    The lions scared of the dog and the dog is scared of the lion so you gotta pick one of two options.

    WHICH DO YOU CHOOSE?

    Stay in between them, so neither one can make a move for fear of the other animal, scream a lot, call 911.


    Also Mustang honestly I'm starting to think your threshold for donkey sex bribes are a lot lot lower than a million dollars.

    Angel_of_Bacon on
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Okay, so, SUPER serious question, AC, sort of relevant. I ask this question to all of my good friends and you are now my good friends and I don't think I've asked you guys before (if I have, well, whatever). I have a running tally and it's fascinating to see what people choose

    You're in an alley, running away from an escaped lion who is infamous for rape. You know he's going to rape you. So you are running. UNFORTUNATELY, at the other end of the alley is a dog who is notorious for eating your dominant hand. The lions scared of the dog and the dog is scared of the lion so you gotta pick one of two options. One, be raped by a lion. Two, get your favourite hand bitten off. You'll recieve fast medical attention in either case as you're in a city alley and people will hear your girly screams, but no promises on how lethal either one is, up to you to decide.

    WHICH DO YOU CHOOSE?

    Well I value my hands more than my ass, so I'd have to go for the rape one.
    If something ever happened to my hands I'd seriously consider suicide, my life revolves around my hands.

    Mustang on
  • BuckwolfeBuckwolfe Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Okay, so, SUPER serious question, AC, sort of relevant. I ask this question to all of my good friends and you are now my good friends and I don't think I've asked you guys before (if I have, well, whatever). I have a running tally and it's fascinating to see what people choose

    You're in an alley, running away from an escaped lion who is infamous for rape. You know he's going to rape you. So you are running. UNFORTUNATELY, at the other end of the alley is a dog who is notorious for eating your dominant hand. The lions scared of the dog and the dog is scared of the lion so you gotta pick one of two options. One, be raped by a lion. Two, get your favourite hand bitten off. You'll recieve fast medical attention in either case as you're in a city alley and people will hear your girly screams, but no promises on how lethal either one is, up to you to decide.

    WHICH DO YOU CHOOSE?

    Question!!

    Am I just like the lion's last resort, because he's stressed and has to bust a load, or does he really love me? Like, hypothetically, would he call me a few days later for a hook-up?

    I just don't want to be used, and then left hanging not knowing whether this relationship has any potential or not. I'm not sure if I could take that kind of rejection...

    Buckwolfe on
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2010
    I run back and forth between the dog and the lion.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Twitch Channel
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    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
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  • KochikensKochikens Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    He'd cuddle you after


    Bacon, no go. Gotta pick one. One of them will make a move. They hunger for your hand/holes.

    Kochikens on
  • BuckwolfeBuckwolfe Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    He'd cuddle you after

    I guess I'd have to go with the lion rape then.

    Buckwolfe on
  • MagicToasterMagicToaster JapanRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Does the lion have a small penis?

    MagicToaster on
  • KochikensKochikens Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    He's got a barbed penis.

    Kochikens on
  • Angel_of_BaconAngel_of_Bacon Moderator mod
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Bacon, no go. Gotta pick one. One of them will make a move. They hunger for your hand/holes.

    This is BS man.

    I guess if that strategy didn't work (and frankly I think it would, I think that's what MacGuyver would have gone with), it would have to be the lion rape as well.

    I can draw standing up if there's lingering soreness down there, but drawing without hands would be a lot trickier.

    EDIT: BARBED PENIS NOW YOU'RE JUST MAKING SHIT UP. WHERE DID IT ESCAPE FROM, A GREEK MYTH?!

    Angel_of_Bacon on
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    He's got a barbed penis.

    This wasn't mentioned in the original synopsis!

    Mustang on
  • KochikensKochikens Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Well, it's a fact. Lions have backwards pointing spines on their dicks. YOU SHOULD HAVE RESEARCHED BEFORE MAKING YOUR SELECTION.


    Surprisingly, the tally is prettymuch 50/50, and I have asked a lot of people.

    Kochikens on
  • J-PJ-P Registered User
    edited February 2010
    *walks in*
    ...
    *walks out*

    J-P on
    Ray gun and sharpies.
  • Angel_of_BaconAngel_of_Bacon Moderator mod
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Well, it's a fact. Lions have backwards pointing spines on their dicks. YOU SHOULD HAVE RESEARCHED BEFORE MAKING YOUR SELECTION.


    Surprisingly, the tally is prettymuch 50/50, and I have asked a lot of people.

    I wish I could refute this, but I refuse to google for "lion dicks" to see if you're lying or not.

    Angel_of_Bacon on
  • BuckwolfeBuckwolfe Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Mustang wrote: »
    Kochikens wrote: »
    He's got a barbed penis.

    This wasn't mentioned in the original synopsis!

    Hm....


    Still going with the lion rape.

    The way I figure it, even if a barbed lion penis ruins my asshole, I sincerely doubt I'll get fucked in it again. Not by choice at least. So its not like I have to worry about keeping up appearances that way.

    Plus I'm sure a little plastic surgery could fix any real damage to my asshole. A hand is a whole other story.

    Buckwolfe on
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    I'd still go the rape, I could deal with a colostomy bag a whole lot better than a missing hand.

    Mustang on
  • ManonvonSuperockManonvonSuperock Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Mustang wrote: »
    I always love the one: "Would you have sex with someone for a million dollars?" and people say no.
    Jesus, I would have sex with a donkey for a million dollars. I'm not saying I'd enjoy it, but never having to pay rent again vs. a little emotional scaring, totally worth it.

    Obviously you haven't thought this through, like the people that win the lottery and wind up broke.

    Does this assume that cash exchange for donkey sex would be on the level and above board? Or do you have to go to a donkey-sex friendly country to do the deed? If so, do you have to pay for the flight/hotel/venue? Will you be able to take your ill-gotten gains back into your country of origin, or will you be liable for prosecution? Will you have to move to donkey-sex country as a permanent resident? Do you have to pay for the move? Do you have to pay tax on donkey-sex related income? Do you get it all in one lump-sum or is it a certain amount per year for a certain number of years? Do they just give it to you in one big suitcase and trust you to walk through the seedy neighborhood that is ok with donkey sex and not get mugged on your way back home? Is it going to be publicized? Are you going to have to live down a rep as "Donkey Sex Guy" for the rest of your life, or spend all your money on plastic surgery to get some privacy?

    I doubt the donkey sex business is the cut and dry glamour affair you seem to think it is, Mustang.

    EDIT: OH YEAH HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY EVERYBODY

    so far, this post is the height of my valentine's day.

    well, that and winning a big pack of nice toilet paper playing yut-something, some korean stick-tossing game for lunar new year.

    also, again: fuck valentine's day.

    jus' sayin'

    ManonvonSuperock on
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    The winter olympics is so much better than the summer olympics, lots of high speed/nutty sports and zero commercial bullshit from local advertisers.

    Mustang on
  • KochikensKochikens Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Well, it's a fact. Lions have backwards pointing spines on their dicks. YOU SHOULD HAVE RESEARCHED BEFORE MAKING YOUR SELECTION.


    Surprisingly, the tally is prettymuch 50/50, and I have asked a lot of people.

    I wish I could refute this, but I refuse to google for "lion dicks" to see if you're lying or not.

    Why do you think cats yowl so god damned much when they're boffing

    *adds data to tally*

    Kochikens on
  • Forbe!Forbe! Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Haha, boffing.

    Forbe! on
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  • ManonvonSuperockManonvonSuperock Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    buckwolfe would know. he had that lion-man avatar and err'thang.

    ManonvonSuperock on
  • McGibsMcGibs TorontoRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    I pick the dog.

    I can train myself to use my other hand, AND I'd get a sweet ass hook!
    Or a robot hand.

    McGibs on
    website_header.jpg
  • Angel_of_BaconAngel_of_Bacon Moderator mod
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Well, it's a fact. Lions have backwards pointing spines on their dicks. YOU SHOULD HAVE RESEARCHED BEFORE MAKING YOUR SELECTION.


    Surprisingly, the tally is prettymuch 50/50, and I have asked a lot of people.

    I wish I could refute this, but I refuse to google for "lion dicks" to see if you're lying or not.

    Why do you think cats yowl so god damned much when they're boffing

    *adds data to tally*

    Why do you assume I know what cats are like when they have bang?

    They could reproduce asexually for all I know.

    Angel_of_Bacon on
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Wait a minute, there's going to be robot hands? I want a robot hand.

    Mustang on
  • Forbe!Forbe! Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    I'd kill for a mechanical hand.

    Forbe! on
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  • QuestionMarkManQuestionMarkMan Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Cheesecake

    Pie or cake?

    QuestionMarkMan on
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2010
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Kochikens wrote: »
    Well, it's a fact. Lions have backwards pointing spines on their dicks. YOU SHOULD HAVE RESEARCHED BEFORE MAKING YOUR SELECTION.


    Surprisingly, the tally is prettymuch 50/50, and I have asked a lot of people.

    I wish I could refute this, but I refuse to google for "lion dicks" to see if you're lying or not.

    Why do you think cats yowl so god damned much when they're boffing

    *adds data to tally*

    I don't know about lions specifically, but this is true about housecats.

    It's so they become latched onto each other when they start bucking and thrashing about.

    And Racoons have a forked penis!

    Basically we spent one day in AP Biology talking about animal dicks. As far as I know, we weren't tested on the material.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Twitch Channel
    Steam: munkus_beaver
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    http://www.ccfa.org/
  • McGibsMcGibs TorontoRegistered User regular
    edited February 2010
    you idiots just didn't think that far ahead.
    shredded colon... OR... awesome customized prosthetic.


    I was talking with my friend the other day, and somehow the conversation turned to making totally badass artificial limbs. I mean, your arm/leg whatever is gone, WHY the hell do they try to make those bullshit fake skin things. Everyone can obviously tell theyre fake, you arnt fooling anyone.
    If I lost an appendage, I'd make it goddamn interesting. Get some intricate and ornate armor plates bolted on, then rip all the sleaves off my shirts.
    People dont go: "aww. that poor man has a fake arm."
    they go: "Holy shit, that guy has an awesome plate mail fake arm!"

    McGibs on
    website_header.jpg
  • ManonvonSuperockManonvonSuperock Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    yeah, it'd be like "he improved his arm" instead of "here's a weak-ass impersonation"

    ManonvonSuperock on
  • Forbe!Forbe! Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    McGibs wrote: »
    you idiots just didn't think that far ahead.
    shredded colon... OR... awesome customized prosthetic.


    I was talking with my friend the other day, and somehow the conversation turned to making totally badass artificial limbs. I mean, your arm/leg whatever is gone, WHY the hell do they try to make those bullshit fake skin things. Everyone can obviously tell theyre fake, you arnt fooling anyone.
    If I lost an appendage, I'd make it goddamn interesting. Get some intricate and ornate armor plates bolted on, then rip all the sleaves off my shirts.
    People dont go: "aww. that poor man has a fake arm."
    they go: "Holy shit, that guy has an awesome plate mail fake arm!"

    Dude, I'd totally get a yosemite sam mudflap for my mechanical arm.

    Forbe! on
    bv2ylq8pac8s.png
  • TamTam Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    maybe one day soon you could get one of these

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1OBzc9QfIs&feature=related

    Tam on
  • ManonvonSuperockManonvonSuperock Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    man, that's a really good looking robotic-arm-having arkansas girl.

    ManonvonSuperock on
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    It needs more power, I don't want to pick up stupid keys and crackers.
    I want to punch through walls and crush skulls.

    Mustang on
  • TamTam Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    I meant as a prosthetic rather than an enhancement. Isn't that was Gibs was talking about?

    Tam on
  • Munkus BeaverMunkus Beaver Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited February 2010
    Gibs was clearly talking about auto-mail.

    Munkus Beaver on
    Twitch Channel
    Steam: munkus_beaver
    Humor can be dissected, as a frog can, but it dies in the process.
    http://www.ccfa.org/
  • MustangMustang Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Stop being lame Gibs.

    Mustang on
  • TamTam Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Oh okay. Well, I'm sure Pinako would be happy to make an arm for you if you can find her.

    Tam on
  • Forbe!Forbe! Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    My arm would be a fucking sledge hammer. Or a giant pair of clamps.

    Forbe! on
    bv2ylq8pac8s.png
  • QuestionMarkManQuestionMarkMan Registered User regular
    edited February 2010
    Forbe! wrote: »
    My arm would be a fucking sledge hammer. Or a giant pair of clamps.
    200px-clamps.jpg

    QuestionMarkMan on
This discussion has been closed.