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Worst books ever written/published?

DrezDrez Registered User regular
edited January 2007 in Debate and/or Discourse
This doesn't necessarily have to be classic novels or anything, or even very popular ones (though a mention of either would probably breed the most discussion). I am curious what books people have read that they hate, and why. I ask for two reasons: mild curiosity, and I am currently trying to write and I'm interested in knowing what some people dislike in popular literature and the reasoning because their dislike. Please mark very in-depth info with spoiler tags.

I'll open it up with my absolute least favorite book. I dislike this book far more than any I've ever read:

A Separate Peace by John Knowles.

I read this in school, long ago, but it sticks out clearly in my mind, and apparently they adapted it to a movie, which is now playing on a TV in the other room...I watched up to the tree scene and walked away in disgust. There is absolutely nothing redeeming about this book, in my opinion. It is told in a first-person narrative, mostly in flashback, and is a story about two friends/roommates at an all-boys school.

As far as I'm concerned, the narrator is a mean-spirited, ambitious, jealous, vapid egomaniac, who perpetrates some rather evil actions against his happy, high-spirited, friend Phinny. Phinny is a genuinely good person. The narrator is a genuinely bad person. This would be fine if it weren't told as some pretentious flashback to the "days of yore" when, apparently, the narrator thinks himself a child, all his evil actions in the past.

My biggest problem is that there were two climactic moments in the story:

[realspoiler:a98cdadd6b]The narrator knocks Phinny out of a tree and breaks his leg.

The narrator upsets Phinny while he is healing and Phinny breaks his leg again and dies.[/realspoiler:a98cdadd6b]

To me, the rest is filler, and I thought the book was awful and didn't really send any clear message except that the narrator was a true asshole who was now trying to push all his childhood actions behind him in his adult life.

Thoughts? Other books you hate?

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    thorpethorpe Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    A Lesson Before Dying.

    Just an awful version of To Kill A Mockingbird.

    And, I'm rather hateful towards Life of Pi.

    thorpe on
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    arod_77arod_77 __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2007
    The Bear and the Dragon by Tom Clancy is a true mess

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    Mai-KeroMai-Kero Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    The Catcher in the Rye.

    Motherfucker should have shot himself on the first page and saved us all some time.

    Mai-Kero on
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    Irond WillIrond Will WARNING: NO HURTFUL COMMENTS, PLEASE!!!!! Cambridge. MAModerator mod
    edited January 2007
    The Stand by Steven King

    Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. The sequel(s) might have been worse, but I wouldn't know because I won't read anything else by that dumb fucker.

    The Firm by John Grisham

    The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand.

    Magister Ludi/ The Glass Bead Game by Hermann Hesse. Fuck Herman Hesse. Fuck that guy.

    I also read a Robin Cook book at one point and it was terrible. I think it was called Coma but I don't really remember much more about it. I have a feeling that if I actually went ahead and read any of those Rainbow Six books they'd make the list as well.

    Irond Will on
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    DynagripDynagrip Break me a million hearts HoustonRegistered User, ClubPA regular
    edited January 2007
    Kevin J. Anderson.....


    KEVIN J. ANDERSON

    Dynagrip on
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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I can't think of any truly awful books I've read, but I did once try to read a Sebastian Faulks book - he's written Charlotte Gray and a number of other well-respected novels. There was nothing particularly bad about the one I read (Birdsong), but when I came to the sex scene it was so ludicrously written that it completely ruined the message the book was trying to send to me (it is otherwise a serious depiction of a soldier in WW1 - so far as I can remember). It wouldn't have been so bad on its own - it was just completely incongruous with the rest of the book. It did actually win the award for 'worst sex scene' the year it was published.

    Janson on
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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Dynagrip wrote:
    Kevin J. Anderson.....


    KEVIN J. ANDERSON

    Oh, yes. Painful, painful, painful. But not actually the worst - there is some terrible Star Wars fiction out there that manages to be ten times more unreadable than Anderson's books. Can't remember the author's name, but, kids, stay away from SW fiction in general (unless it's by Aaron Allston).

    Janson on
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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Irond Will wrote:
    The Stand by Steven King

    Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. The sequel(s) might have been worse, but I wouldn't know because I won't read anything else by that dumb fucker.

    The Firm by John Grisham

    The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand.

    Magister Ludi/ The Glass Bead Game by Hermann Hesse. Fuck Herman Hesse. Fuck that guy.

    OK, going to hitch to this post for a sec...

    I personally really liked The Fountainhead a lot...I thought it was a page-turner, even for as big as it is.

    Do you dislike it because of the actual writing, or because you hate the philosophy and/or content/situations presented?

    Drez on
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    ZimmydoomZimmydoom Accept no substitutes Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I had an English teacher in high school for a couple of years who basically just assigned books from Oprah's book club. She was a sweetheart and a great teacher, but Goddamnit did her reading list suck. If it didn't have a 14 year-old black girl getting raped, then I wasn't reading it. "The Color Purple" was pretty good, but five books later after finishing "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings" I was ready to beat Maya Angelou's ass with a rake until she said her name was Toby.

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    TankHammerTankHammer Atlanta Ghostbuster Atlanta, GARegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Irond Will wrote:
    The Stand by Steven King

    Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. The sequel(s) might have been worse, but I wouldn't know because I won't read anything else by that dumb fucker.

    The Firm by John Grisham

    The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand.

    Magister Ludi/ The Glass Bead Game by Hermann Hesse. Fuck Herman Hesse. Fuck that guy.

    Wow... I guess I have to start liking Ayn Rand so you can hate authors I have enjoyed reading... I'm about to finish the Stand right now actually.
    I don't think they're masterworks or anything but they pass the time.

    I read Rainbow 6 years ago and tried to read Bear and the Dragon but that fucker put me to sleep.

    I'd have to say that pretty much all books based on video-games, tabletop, science-fiction television/movies and card games suck pretty hard. The only one I read and enjoyed was Eric Nylund's Halo: Fall of Reach and even as fun as that was it was still written at a 4th grade level.

    After that though I'm going and reading Earthsea.

    TankHammer on
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    DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Out From Nowhere. I forget who the author is, and I don't care.

    Had to read it in middle school English class. Of all the tripe I've had to slog through during my stint in public school, I could find at least one redeeming feature in all of them- except that one.

    None of the characters are likable, nevermind that they have no change or growth throughout the entire book. And it's so awkwardly written, too. The supposed "climax" of the story was so convulted in it's description that I spent ten minutes reading the passage over and over trying to make sense of what the fuck was going on.

    [spoiler:8ff28f3ba2]Oh no, the dumb dog I never cared about jumped out of a moving car and now injured itself! OH DEAR WILL HE MAKE IT I WISH I COULD READ FASTER TO FIND OUT.[/spoiler:8ff28f3ba2]

    DarkPrimus on
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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Irond Will wrote:
    The Stand by Steven King

    Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. The sequel(s) might have been worse, but I wouldn't know because I won't read anything else by that dumb fucker.

    The Firm by John Grisham

    The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand.

    Magister Ludi/ The Glass Bead Game by Hermann Hesse. Fuck Herman Hesse. Fuck that guy.

    Wow... I guess I have to start liking Ayn Rand so you can hate authors I have enjoyed reading... I'm about to finish the Stand right now actually.
    I don't think they're masterworks or anything but they pass the time.

    I read Rainbow 6 years ago and tried to read Bear and the Dragon but that fucker put me to sleep.

    I'd have to say that pretty much all books based on video-games, tabletop, science-fiction television/movies and card games suck pretty hard. The only one I read and enjoyed was Eric Nylund's Halo: Fall of Reach and even as fun as that was it was still written at a 4th grade level.

    After that though I'm going and reading Earthsea.

    One note about video game-based novels.

    Hell: A Cyberpunk Thriller is based on the game of the same name. It's an uber-rare book now but I thought it was one of the best science fiction books I've ever read, and actually presented the story much better than the game (which came first).

    I always forget about it, but your post reminded me of it. Highly recommended, if you can find it at the library or something.

    Also, Pandora Directive (based on the Tex Murphy game) was actually a pretty good novel. Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Fathers, by Jane Jensen, was horrible - but The Beast Within was good.

    Drez on
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    AgemAgem Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Drez wrote:
    A Separate Peace by John Knowles.

    I read this in school, long ago, but it sticks out clearly in my mind, and apparently they adapted it to a movie, which is now playing on a TV in the other room...I watched up to the tree scene and walked away in disgust. There is absolutely nothing redeeming about this book, in my opinion. It is told in a first-person narrative, mostly in flashback, and is a story about two friends/roommates at an all-boys school.

    As far as I'm concerned, the narrator is a mean-spirited, ambitious, jealous, vapid egomaniac, who perpetrates some rather evil actions against his happy, high-spirited, friend Phinny. Phinny is a genuinely good person. The narrator is a genuinely bad person. This would be fine if it weren't told as some pretentious flashback to the "days of yore" when, apparently, the narrator thinks himself a child, all his evil actions in the past.

    My biggest problem is that there were two climactic moments in the story:

    [realspoiler:f6f68d3f91]The narrator knocks Phinny out of a tree and breaks his leg.

    The narrator upsets Phinny while he is healing and Phinny breaks his leg again and dies.[/realspoiler:f6f68d3f91]

    To me, the rest is filler, and I thought the book was awful and didn't really send any clear message except that the narrator was a true asshole who was now trying to push all his childhood actions behind him in his adult life.

    Thoughts?
    If anything, the narrator's actions provoked an essentially correct (negative) response from you, although I think you kind of missed the point. You have to explore themes, symbolism, and all that good stuff. I mean, reading A Separate Peace can be enjoyable, but it isn't written to be enjoyable in the same way, say, Lord of the Rings is. There's a lot in there about how dangerous paranoia and envy are, as shown by the narrator's actions, for example, but reading it just for the plot may not get that across.

    You're not necessarily supposed to absolutely despise the narrator as a human being, but you are supposed to see how harmful his actions are and relate that to the world around you.

    Agem on
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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Agem wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    A Separate Peace by John Knowles.

    I read this in school, long ago, but it sticks out clearly in my mind, and apparently they adapted it to a movie, which is now playing on a TV in the other room...I watched up to the tree scene and walked away in disgust. There is absolutely nothing redeeming about this book, in my opinion. It is told in a first-person narrative, mostly in flashback, and is a story about two friends/roommates at an all-boys school.

    As far as I'm concerned, the narrator is a mean-spirited, ambitious, jealous, vapid egomaniac, who perpetrates some rather evil actions against his happy, high-spirited, friend Phinny. Phinny is a genuinely good person. The narrator is a genuinely bad person. This would be fine if it weren't told as some pretentious flashback to the "days of yore" when, apparently, the narrator thinks himself a child, all his evil actions in the past.

    My biggest problem is that there were two climactic moments in the story:

    [realspoiler:227bddb5dd]The narrator knocks Phinny out of a tree and breaks his leg.

    The narrator upsets Phinny while he is healing and Phinny breaks his leg again and dies.[/realspoiler:227bddb5dd]

    To me, the rest is filler, and I thought the book was awful and didn't really send any clear message except that the narrator was a true asshole who was now trying to push all his childhood actions behind him in his adult life.

    Thoughts?
    If anything, the narrator's actions provoked an essentially correct (negative) response from you, although I think you kind of missed the point. You have to explore themes, symbolism, and all that good stuff. I mean, reading A Separate Peace can be enjoyable, but it isn't written to be enjoyable in the same way, say, Lord of the Rings is. There's a lot in there about how dangerous paranoia and envy are, as shown by the narrator's actions, for example, but reading it just for the plot may not get that across.

    You're not necessarily supposed to absolutely despite the narrator as a human being, but you are supposed to see how harmful his actions are and relate that to the world around you.

    See, the main problem I have with the book is that it isn't enjoyable and it's pretty much drudging to read. That, in and of itself, is not enough to call a book "horrible," I admit. What makes it horrible is that it is such a painful story, but the themes explored are rather childish. It's a story about a jealous twit. Sure, I can relate it to stuff around me, but so what? The book fails as a literary piece, in my opinion, because it is little deeper than an anecdote. There's just not much there.

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    OlivawOlivaw good name, isn't it? the foot of mt fujiRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I have not had the pleasure, but my mom is convinced that the Bridges of Madison County is the worst book ever written.

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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Oh!

    Charles Dickens' Hard Times. In my opinion Dickens is hugely overrated and Hard Times is nothing but an extremely hard slog. Our class only had to read the first few chapters and that was quite enough, thank you.

    Janson on
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    CouscousCouscous Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    How about Eldest?
    Going to the stream by the house, they quickly disrobed. Eragon surreptitiously watched the elf, curious as to what he looked like without his clothes. Oromis was very thin, yet his muscles were perfectly defined, etched under his skin with the hard lines of a woodcut. No hair grew upon his chest or legs, not even around his groin. His body seemed almost freakish to Eragon, compared to the men he was used to seeing in Carvahall--although it had a certain refined elegance to it, like that of a wildcat.

    Couscous on
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    AgemAgem Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Drez wrote:
    See, the main problem I have with the book is that it isn't enjoyable and it's pretty much drudging to read. That, in and of itself, is not enough to call a book "horrible," I admit. What makes it horrible is that it is such a painful story, but the themes explored are rather childish. It's a story about a jealous twit. Sure, I can relate it to stuff around me, but so what? The book fails as a literary piece, in my opinion, because it is little deeper than an anecdote. There's just not much there.
    Nevermind then. I just thought you didn't like it solely because the narrator was a dick, but if you thought the book was shallow, we just have a difference of opinion.

    Agem on
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    UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I'd have to say that pretty much all books based on video-games, tabletop, science-fiction television/movies and card games suck pretty hard.

    The anatomy of a typical chapter in Trollslayer, by William King:

    Felix, the dodgy human adventurer, gets wind of some kind of a quest.

    Gotrek, the insane dwarf, calls Felix a "manling" and makes a funny face.

    There is a paragraph of deep reflection, in which we ponder the vast differences between dwarven and human society.

    Felix and Gotrek go find the thing they're suppose to find/protect/kill/rescue/destroy.

    Gotrek runs his thumb along the blade of his ancestral axe, drawing a thin bead of blood.

    The author gives an intricate, roll-by-roll description of the battle encounter. There is always at least one instance of Gotrek whirling around with both axes, screaming maniacally. Felix, meanwhile, experiences Inner Angst(TM).

    Gotrek is finally dead! Hurrah!

    No he's not.

    In a Shocking Twist(TM), the thing they're supposed find/protect/kill/rescue/destroy is actually something that they need to destroy/lose/protect/kill/find! For the good of the Empire! And stuff!

    They do.

    Repeat.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Agem wrote:
    Drez wrote:
    See, the main problem I have with the book is that it isn't enjoyable and it's pretty much drudging to read. That, in and of itself, is not enough to call a book "horrible," I admit. What makes it horrible is that it is such a painful story, but the themes explored are rather childish. It's a story about a jealous twit. Sure, I can relate it to stuff around me, but so what? The book fails as a literary piece, in my opinion, because it is little deeper than an anecdote. There's just not much there.
    Nevermind then. I just thought you didn't like it solely because the narrator was a dick, but if you thought the book was shallow, we just have a difference of opinion.
    Yeah, it's a combination of the two for me. What's funny is my teacher hated it too, but was forced to teach it. She didn't tell that to the class, but afterward I went up to her and told her how awful I thought it was, and she agreed with me. :P

    To each their own though. She abhorred Edgar Allen Poe and rhymed poetry.

    Drez on
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    JragghenJragghen Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I didn't particularly mind A Separate Peace, although I did find it mildly dry.

    I couldn't stand As I Lay Dying. I thought it was one of the stupidest books I had ever been forced to read.

    Also, Sword of Truth.
    Hissing, hackles lifting, the chicken's head rose. Kahlan pulled back. Its claws digging into stiff dead flesh, the chicken slowly turned to face her. It cocked its head, making its comb flop, its wattles sway. "Shoo," Kahlan heard herself whisper. There wasn't enough light, and besides, the side of its beak was covered with gore, so she couldn't tell if it had the dark spot, But she didn't need to see it. "Dear spirits, help me," she prayed under her breath. The bird let out a slow chicken cackle. It sounded like a chicken, but in her heart she knew it wasn't. In that instant, she completely understood the concept of a chicken that was not a chicken. This looked like a chicken, like most of the Mud People's chickens. But this was no chicken. This was evil manifest.

    Seriously, people. Just try to beat that

    Jragghen on
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    FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    I hated A Separate Peace too. Which is funny, because it's one of my SO's favorite books and we've had these long conversations about it where she says that I just don't get it and I'm like.. no, I get it, I just don't like it.
    Agem wrote:
    As far as I'm concerned, the narrator is a mean-spirited, ambitious, jealous, vapid egomaniac, who perpetrates some rather evil actions against his happy, high-spirited, friend Phinny.

    Oddly enough, I didn't like the narrator or Phinny. Phinny reminded me of the jock closet cases at my school. Sure, he's happy, but he's young, beautiful, athletic, and never had anything bad happen to him until this coddled little Abercrombie and Fitch model breaks his leg, and now that he's physically imperfect all of a sudden we're supposed to weep for him? Fuck that. That and I kept wishing the two main characters would fuck and get it over with.
    Irond Will wrote:
    The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand.

    The rape scene in The Fountainhead made me physically naseous. This book was basically about Ayn Rand's adolescent fantasy man - an imaginary lover so perfect to be inhuman who she wished would sweep her off her feet.

    Another book I hated: Lord of the Flies. It's supposed to be about human nature? No, it's about the nature of early 20th century British schoolboys. The characters have themselves been heavily abused, so abuse is all they know. I don't know much about William Golding's life, but if that's his vision of human nature I feel sorry for him.

    Feral on
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    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
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    thorpethorpe Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Jragghen wrote:
    I didn't particularly mind A Separate Peace, although I did find it mildly dry.

    I couldn't stand As I Lay Dying. I thought it was one of the stupidest books I had ever been forced to read.

    Also, Sword of Truth.
    Hissing, hackles lifting, the chicken's head rose. Kahlan pulled back. Its claws digging into stiff dead flesh, the chicken slowly turned to face her. It cocked its head, making its comb flop, its wattles sway. "Shoo," Kahlan heard herself whisper. There wasn't enough light, and besides, the side of its beak was covered with gore, so she couldn't tell if it had the dark spot, But she didn't need to see it. "Dear spirits, help me," she prayed under her breath. The bird let out a slow chicken cackle. It sounded like a chicken, but in her heart she knew it wasn't. In that instant, she completely understood the concept of a chicken that was not a chicken. This looked like a chicken, like most of the Mud People's chickens. But this was no chicken. This was evil manifest.

    Seriously, people. Just try to beat that

    You win with the force of ten-hundred exploding neutron stars.



    And I liked The Stand. Jurassic Park was fun in a juvenile sort of way, as was Sphere.

    thorpe on
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    LondonBridgeLondonBridge __BANNED USERS regular
    edited January 2007
    Contact by Carl Sagan was sooooooooooooooooooooooo boring. Movie was much better.

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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Feral wrote:
    until this coddled little Abercrombie and Fitch model breaks his leg

    Hahahahahahahah, that's awesome. Just FYI though, you are quoting Agem up there, but that was my description of the book, not his.
    Feral wrote:
    Another book I hated: Lord of the Flies. It's supposed to be about human nature? No, it's about the nature of early 20th century British schoolboys. The characters have themselves been heavily abused, so abuse is all they know. I don't know much about William Golding's life, but if that's his vision of human nature I feel sorry for him.

    Ahh, thank you. I was going to mention Lord of the Flies but I left it off, as I wanted to see if anyone else mentioned it. Lord of the Flies is my second least favorite book.

    Drez on
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    UndefinedMonkeyUndefinedMonkey Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Jragghen wrote:
    Also, Sword of Truth.
    :shock:

    Seriously, people. Just try to beat that

    You know what, I'm gonna retract my vote for Trollslayer. Goodkind makes King look like M. John Harrison.

    UndefinedMonkey on
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    AgemAgem Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Feral wrote:
    Another book I hated: Lord of the Flies. It's supposed to be about human nature? No, it's about the nature of early 20th century British schoolboys. The characters have themselves been heavily abused, so abuse is all they know. I don't know much about William Golding's life, but if that's his vision of human nature I feel sorry for him.
    You should read Heart of Darkness.

    Agem on
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    thorpethorpe Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Agem wrote:
    Feral wrote:
    Another book I hated: Lord of the Flies. It's supposed to be about human nature? No, it's about the nature of early 20th century British schoolboys. The characters have themselves been heavily abused, so abuse is all they know. I don't know much about William Golding's life, but if that's his vision of human nature I feel sorry for him.
    You should read Heart of Darkness.

    Heart of Darkness is my favorite short story.

    And I liked Lord of the Flies.

    To each his own.

    thorpe on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    AgemAgem Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    thorpe wrote:
    Agem wrote:
    Feral wrote:
    Another book I hated: Lord of the Flies. It's supposed to be about human nature? No, it's about the nature of early 20th century British schoolboys. The characters have themselves been heavily abused, so abuse is all they know. I don't know much about William Golding's life, but if that's his vision of human nature I feel sorry for him.
    You should read Heart of Darkness.
    Heart of Darkness is my favorite short story.

    And I liked Lord of the Flies.

    To each his own.
    Oddly, I liked Heart of Darkness but not Lord of the Flies. Nothing wrong with Lord of the Flies, I just couldn't get into it.

    But the themes are similar.

    Agem on
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    ElJeffeElJeffe Moderator, ClubPA mod
    edited January 2007
    Anything by Dean Koontz.

    I read a lot of his books when I was in Jr. High and early in high school, and I liked them a lot. When I got older, I learned what decent writing was, and realized what a fucking hack Koontz is. Now I can't read five pages of his writing without wanting to hurl.

    ElJeffe on
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    DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    titmouse wrote:
    How about Eldest?
    Going to the stream by the house, they quickly disrobed. Eragon surreptitiously watched the elf, curious as to what he looked like without his clothes. Oromis was very thin, yet his muscles were perfectly defined, etched under his skin with the hard lines of a woodcut. No hair grew upon his chest or legs, not even around his groin. His body seemed almost freakish to Eragon, compared to the men he was used to seeing in Carvahall--although it had a certain refined elegance to it, like that of a wildcat.

    He should add "gay" to his resume.

    "NEW BOOK BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLI, GAY TEENAGER."

    DarkPrimus on
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    thorpethorpe Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    DarkPrimus wrote:
    titmouse wrote:
    How about Eldest?
    Going to the stream by the house, they quickly disrobed. Eragon surreptitiously watched the elf, curious as to what he looked like without his clothes. Oromis was very thin, yet his muscles were perfectly defined, etched under his skin with the hard lines of a woodcut. No hair grew upon his chest or legs, not even around his groin. His body seemed almost freakish to Eragon, compared to the men he was used to seeing in Carvahall--although it had a certain refined elegance to it, like that of a wildcat.

    He should add "gay" to his resume.

    "NEW BOOK BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLI, GAY TEENAGER."

    He's a teenager? That would explain some stuff, I guess.

    thorpe on
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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    JansonJanson Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Oh!

    Jeffe's post reminds me; anything by R. L. Stine. I once read one of my sister's books. It was atrocious. I couldn't even like him as a child.

    Janson on
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    FeralFeral MEMETICHARIZARD interior crocodile alligator ⇔ ǝɹʇɐǝɥʇ ǝᴉʌoɯ ʇǝloɹʌǝɥɔ ɐ ǝʌᴉɹp ᴉRegistered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Drez wrote:
    Just FYI though, you are quoting Agem up there, but that was my description of the book, not his.

    Oops, sorry.
    Agem wrote:
    You should read Heart of Darkness.

    I did, but it was a long time ago and I don't remember it terribly well. I remember that it didn't grate on me nearly as much as Lord of the Files.

    Feral on
    every person who doesn't like an acquired taste always seems to think everyone who likes it is faking it. it should be an official fallacy.

    the "no true scotch man" fallacy.
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    JragghenJragghen Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    thorpe wrote:
    DarkPrimus wrote:
    titmouse wrote:
    How about Eldest?
    Going to the stream by the house, they quickly disrobed. Eragon surreptitiously watched the elf, curious as to what he looked like without his clothes. Oromis was very thin, yet his muscles were perfectly defined, etched under his skin with the hard lines of a woodcut. No hair grew upon his chest or legs, not even around his groin. His body seemed almost freakish to Eragon, compared to the men he was used to seeing in Carvahall--although it had a certain refined elegance to it, like that of a wildcat.

    He should add "gay" to his resume.

    "NEW BOOK BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLI, GAY TEENAGER."

    He's a teenager? That would explain some stuff, I guess.

    He was 15 when he started the first book. He's 20-something now, I believe. Also worth noting that the book was published by his parents, so his being published at that age is put in a highly different light.

    Jragghen on
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    DrezDrez Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    ElJeffe wrote:
    Anything by Dean Koontz.

    I read a lot of his books when I was in Jr. High and early in high school, and I liked them a lot. When I got older, I learned what decent writing was, and realized what a fucking hack Koontz is. Now I can't read five pages of his writing without wanting to hurl.

    I agree, and I think Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman aren't gifted writers either.

    However, I read Lightning recently, by Koontz, and I think the story itself was interesting. I wouldn't call him an "excellent writer" but I admit I really liked the book and the story.

    Same with Weis/Hickman. The difference in literary quality between that duo and, say, George R. R. Martin is so vast, I get a nosebleed thinking about it. Even so, I'd have to say I enjoyed every Chronicles and Legends series book, both Raistlin Chronicles books, and the two transition books - The Second Generation and Dragons of a Summer Flame. I think their writing is shit, but I love those books regardless because the characters are interesting and the stories are fun.

    Drez on
    Switch: SW-7690-2320-9238Steam/PSN/Xbox: Drezdar
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    Der Waffle MousDer Waffle Mous Blame this on the misfortune of your birth. New Yark, New Yark.Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Janson wrote:
    Oh!

    Jeffe's post reminds me; anything by R. L. Stine. I once read one of my sister's books. It was atrocious. I couldn't even like him as a child.
    Oh god, I just remembered how young I was when I realized what "predictable" meant in terms of literature.




    Also: olol bible just to beat people to the punch.

    Der Waffle Mous on
    Steam PSN: DerWaffleMous Origin: DerWaffleMous Bnet: DerWaffle#1682
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    DarkPrimusDarkPrimus Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Jragghen wrote:
    thorpe wrote:
    DarkPrimus wrote:
    titmouse wrote:
    How about Eldest?
    Going to the stream by the house, they quickly disrobed. Eragon surreptitiously watched the elf, curious as to what he looked like without his clothes. Oromis was very thin, yet his muscles were perfectly defined, etched under his skin with the hard lines of a woodcut. No hair grew upon his chest or legs, not even around his groin. His body seemed almost freakish to Eragon, compared to the men he was used to seeing in Carvahall--although it had a certain refined elegance to it, like that of a wildcat.

    He should add "gay" to his resume.

    "NEW BOOK BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLI, GAY TEENAGER."

    He's a teenager? That would explain some stuff, I guess.

    He was 15 when he started the first book. He's 20-something now, I believe. Also worth noting that the book was published by his parents, so his being published at that age is put in a highly different light.

    He STARTED the book at age 15. It wasn't actually published until he was 19, and if you think he didn't revise it at all, I got some beachfront property here in Iowa to sell you.

    Shit, I've got story ideas from back when I was 15. Suppose I should claim I wrote it all back then?

    DarkPrimus on
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    Mai-KeroMai-Kero Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Jragghen wrote:
    thorpe wrote:
    DarkPrimus wrote:
    titmouse wrote:
    How about Eldest?
    Going to the stream by the house, they quickly disrobed. Eragon surreptitiously watched the elf, curious as to what he looked like without his clothes. Oromis was very thin, yet his muscles were perfectly defined, etched under his skin with the hard lines of a woodcut. No hair grew upon his chest or legs, not even around his groin. His body seemed almost freakish to Eragon, compared to the men he was used to seeing in Carvahall--although it had a certain refined elegance to it, like that of a wildcat.

    He should add "gay" to his resume.

    "NEW BOOK BY CHRISTOPHER PAOLI, GAY TEENAGER."

    He's a teenager? That would explain some stuff, I guess.

    He was 15 when he started the first book. He's 20-something now, I believe. Also worth noting that the book was published by his parents, so his being published at that age is put in a highly different light.

    Don't the elves in his books die if they lie?

    Yeah.

    Mai-Kero on
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    HozHoz Cool Cat Registered User regular
    edited January 2007
    Yeah, I hate everything. But recently I finished Hyperion and I've decided to hate it a little extra. When I read the word "tunic" in the love-noir-detective (yes, you read that right) story every inch of my body was in revulsion. The prose overall was tacky and the characters were uninteresting. And to top it all off the first story was like one of the best short stories I've ever read so it basically wills you to read the whole damned book despite how bad it gets. When I finished I decided to declare war on Dan Simmons.

    Hoz on
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