How long do you dudes go without jerking it?

J. Grant

I fucked a 15 year old not that long ago.

[spoiler:7f95f5acd9]OK, I was 15 at the time as well, but it wasn't that long ago if you compare it to the fossil records.[/spoiler:7f95f5acd9]

Creative_Evil

If she's crazy then just ignore her until she goes away, failing that legal action.

Abracadaniel

I'm gonna say no duder.

Meissnerd

Smart Hero wrote:

I'm gonna say no duder.

Draco_Auric

TheKovakistani wrote:

bones have marrow

boners have man marrow

sooo, does that make gay sex a do it your self man marrow transplant? cos that's pretty hot.

Kovak

Take her to the movies

pull the popcorn trick but instead of a real donger put in a dildo

when she grabs it and thinks she has you in her cold, vice like claws

get up and leave.

make sure you were her ride to the theater.

Draco_Auric

naporeon wrote:

She's very good looking.

The issue is more that we're not compatible, and I have a strict "no friends with exes" policy, unless they are exceptional in some way. Like Dr. Girlfriend, that I was talking about last night.

Don't be her friend be her "Buddy"

naporeon

She has sent three more emails since I first posted about her. They are fucking weird. And funny. But mainly weird.

And I'm definitely not going to go hang out with her. There would only be one reason to do that, and to be fair, that's not enough of a reason.

Jordyn

post the e-mails.

alternatingAberration

Does she know where you live?

EDIT: Also

Jordyn wrote:

post the e-mails.

Creative_Evil

TheKovakistani wrote:

Take her to the movies

pull the popcorn trick but instead of a real donger put in a dildo

when she grabs it and thinks she has you in her cold, vice like claws

get up and leave.

make sure you were her ride to the theater.

Rig the popcorn box like the raccoon traps from where the red fern grows.

naporeon

Jordyn wrote:

post the e-mails.

Oh Eric,

I believe for certain Im in love with you post-humorously. Come down. My little sister would love to meet you. We're going to the Reef. Besides that I have two gifts for you. How is that book...read it, reading it...havent picked it up?

L, Boxspring

RSVP Please

Draco_Auric

naporeon wrote:

She has sent three more emails since I first posted about her. They are fucking weird. And funny. But mainly weird.

And I'm definitely not going to go hang out with her. There would only be one reason to do that, and to be fair, that's not enough of a reason.

bah just record and post it to the internet without her consent! much more fun for everyone! (ie. me)

naporeon

I feel like a total
fool writing to you (no matter h0w honest I am, clearly youve moved on) anyhow no one likes to feel foolish and have their heart stepped on at the same time so could you have a bit of mercy and tell me how much you hate me please. thank you/ I dont want to love you and ignoring me doesnt help. TY M

Draco_Auric

naporeon wrote:

Jordyn wrote:

post the e-mails.

Oh Eric,

I believe for certain Im in love with you post-humorously. Come down. My little sister would love to meet you. We're going to the Reef. Besides that I have two gifts for you. How is that book...read it, reading it...havent picked it up?

L, Boxspring

RSVP Please

sooo.... how old is her sister?

edit: spelling

Jordyn

post-humorously.

alternatingAberration

Keep ignoring her, this may be an on going thing we got here

naporeon

Jordyn wrote:

post-humorously.

I am pretty sure that she meant to do that. She's actually pretty smart, and a great writer. She is drunk, by the looks of these.

Creative_Evil

Anybody who uses numbers in the place of letters is not worth your time, the alphabet isn't rocket science.

Meissnerd

It reads like two people wrote two different emails. "Come down"?

Kovak

bonus points if you get her to cut herself and pour salt in the wounds

naporeon

I'll just call at 9:00 or 9:30 if I dont hear from you okay
Which is what I suspect. So make sure you dont answer!

alternatingAberration

naporeon wrote:

I'll just call at 9:00 or 9:30 if I dont hear from you okay
Which is what I suspect. So make sure you dont answer!

Has she called you yet? If not can you record it? Please? Pretty please?

Jordyn

keep ignoring her.

If you need to hideout at our place, that's cool.

Not right now though, we're at Weaver's.

Xyth

She doesn't seem that bad. Ask her nicely for pics of herself. Sans clothes of course.

Creative_Evil

Krosius wrote:

naporeon wrote:

I'll just call at 9:00 or 9:30 if I dont hear from you okay
Which is what I suspect. So make sure you dont answer!

Has she called you yet? If not can you record it? Please? Pretty please?

Stream it so we can give you real-time advise.

Insufficient Postage

Draco_Auric wrote:

TheKovakistani wrote:

bones have marrow

boners have man marrow

sooo, does that make gay sex a do it your self man marrow transplant? cos that's pretty hot.

"Dude, I really don't wanna fuck you in the ass."

"You have to do it, it's life or death."

Kovak

quick now tell her to press 8 for cocks and 9 for dicks

naporeon

Xyth wrote:

She doesn't seem that bad. Ask her nicely for pics of herself. Sans clothes of course.

Ha.

A gentleman always destroys the nudie pics, post breakup.

Xyth

naporeon wrote:

Xyth wrote:

She doesn't seem that bad. Ask her nicely for pics of herself. Sans clothes of course.

Ha.

A gentleman always destroys the nudie pics, post breakup.

Are YOU a gentleman?

alternatingAberration

naporeon wrote:

Xyth wrote:

She doesn't seem that bad. Ask her nicely for pics of herself. Sans clothes of course.

Ha.

A gentleman always destroys the nudie pics, post breakup.

hehe.....wait...are you serious?

naporeon

Krosius wrote:

naporeon wrote:

Xyth wrote:

She doesn't seem that bad. Ask her nicely for pics of herself. Sans clothes of course.

Ha.

A gentleman always destroys the nudie pics, post breakup.

hehe.....wait...are you serious?

Well, I'm serious that *I* do it.

Draco_Auric

If you do end up avoiding her just make sure you let her know that there is at least one creepy internet nerd that would totally fuck her (as long as she flys out to Toronto)

naporeon

SHE JUST KEEPS EMAILING ME. GOD.

Abracadaniel

I destroy the naked photos of females for whom I am no longer in a relationship.

Insufficient Postage

Draco_Auric wrote:

If you do end up avoiding her just make sure you let her know that there is at least one creepy internet nerd that would totally fuck her (as long as she flys out to Toronto)

There is always a creepy internet nerd that would fuck her, I'm sure that she'd have no problem finding a local creepy nerd.

naporeon

Smart Hero wrote:

I destroy the naked photos of females for whom I am no longer in a relationship.

I did hold onto a video once. For a couple months.

For purely sentimental reasons, you understand.

<3

naporeon wrote:

SHE JUST KEEPS EMAILING ME. GOD.

block her?

Zombies Tossed My Salad!

Smart Hero wrote:

I destroy the naked photos of females for whom I am no longer in a relationship.

I have naked photos of 3 females I am not in relationships with. Or have ever been.

Abracadaniel

Me too Nap.