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Redhead Wants To Fuck His Mom
I Win Swordfights
all the traits of greatnessstarlight at my feetRegistered User regular
all the traits of greatnessstarlight at my feetRegistered User regular
If not here is the story
http://forums.penny-arcade.com/showpost.php?p=8035495&postcount=792
anyway Faynor and I were talking about our families and started talking about small towns and stuff and how scary they are and it prompted me to look up Forbestown. I now present you with their official website (pay close attention to the URL):
http://www.road-kill-cafe.com/forbestown/about.html
How fucked up is your family, SE++?
http://forums.penny-arcade.com/showpost.php?p=8035495&postcount=792
I Win Swordfights wrote:Jesus goddamn christ thanksgiving
I don't know if you noticed (you didn't) but I have been gone for the past almost four days.
Well, it is because I was up in Forbestown, California, which is about as rural and buttfucky as you can get in California.
They got metheads, crack babies, and there was even a guy next door to my uncle's house in super short cutoff denim shorts with willy nelson locks having his own personal one man ecstasy fueled rave.
Now, normally, I consider my Uncle's house a safe haven from all this insanity.
However, on this particular thanksgiving getaway, I got hit with the brown eye of the storm.
Let's go to thanksgiving day.
I have a cousin, who we'll call Ally because that's her name.
Ally is your typical fourteen year old "emo" girl, who writes stupid poetry and listens to stupid music and has stupid friends and has her room painted black with posters of My Chemical Romance up on her walls.
Now, despite all this, Ally is pretty fun to hang out with, and we've been close since we were very young.
However, Ally's parents, my aunt and uncle, are pretty liberal and uncaring and allow profuse alcohol consumption by all.
I tend not to drink at these gatherings because I don't trust those meth'd up hillbillies not to break in and start shit.
Ally does not follow this particular stigma.
Ally gets pissdrunk and when everyone goes to bed, begins to hit on me.
You may be asking yourself "Swordfights, did you remember to bring your condoms" to which I say, shut up let me finish my story.
So Ally is hitting on me, trying to take off my pants, saying things akin to "I hate you, because you're illegal" and "Is it bad that I wanna kiss you", and when I kissed her on the forehead to shut her up she replied with "No, not like that"
So I'm about ready to let her collapse onto the floor and pass out for the night when she does collapse, but instead of passing out, she proceeds to claw at herself saying "I CAN FEEL IT I CAN FEEL HIM HITTING ME HE'S KICKING ME OH GOD" and so I have to restrain her because she is breaking the skin.
She proceeds to claw me
A couple times during this episode she passes out and stops breathing, so I slap and shake her awake until she regains consciousness and breathes.
I can't leave the girl alone because there is a very high probability she will choke on her own vomit and die.
So as I'm sitting there thinking "God damnit why didn't I go to sleep two hours ago", I see a family friend we invited along walk by.
I go grab her, and we take her into the bathroom, induce vomiting, and I wake up her parents and tell them what happened and get my sleepy ass to bed.
Fun Thanksgiving, right?
anyway Faynor and I were talking about our families and started talking about small towns and stuff and how scary they are and it prompted me to look up Forbestown. I now present you with their official website (pay close attention to the URL):
http://www.road-kill-cafe.com/forbestown/about.html
How fucked up is your family, SE++?
I Win Swordfights on
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What spring does with the cherry trees.
your = belonging to you
their = belonging to them
there = not here
they're = they are
Interesting story, though. Did your cousin ever get out of her emo phase?
The Apocalypse Has Never Been More Fun
Secret Satan Wishlist!! Thinkgeek Wish List
copycat
My story came first!
Like, a year before!
What spring does with the cherry trees.
Well she moved into this scene myspace thing
She's still pretty cool we don't really talk about her wanting my dick
If you mouse over the text, it'll switch to red text, all caps.
your = belonging to you
their = belonging to them
there = not here
they're = they are
no kidding
I stumbled upon my (female) cousin masturbating. Or maybe removing a tampon. Or something.
She was standing on the toilet seat and leaning against the wall for some strange reason I still don't understand
Anyway, I slammed the door as soon as i saw bare ass
God, I still have no fucking clue what she was doing
guys my hot sister blew me last night and swallowed it was super hot
do I want to type up what dumbfucks my cousins have been...
JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
do it. the world must know of stupid bitches.
Although i don't really know what it's about so it is open to interpretation
What spring does with the cherry trees.
seriously
i need to complete the scene in my head
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xEZcslNOEBg
Okay gimme a few minutes to work up the energy.
JordynNolz.com <- All my blogs (Shepard, Wasted, J'onn, DCAU) are here now!
Which i mean is kinda cool, but being the hottest black chick in Arizona? There's pool of what 30 people total.
if only he could live up to your illustrious career in threadmaking
if only
it was hilarious
What spring does with the cherry trees.
was?
your = belonging to you
their = belonging to them
there = not here
they're = they are
That was one of the best threads we've ever had
she was talking about his richard nixon mask
I will tell you gus right now though, I am not so good at mean words so I will only ignore the barbs, there will be no word fights
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQ5XOwiryv0