One-Night Stand Issue

Mertzy

So this girl and I hooked up the other night and parted ways in the morning at separate times. I didn't get a chance to get her number and I really liked her. I did the lamest thing of sending her a Facebook message with my number for lunch sometime directly the morning after, and she replied, but with nothing much on getting together again. It really kind of got to me as I'm not really used to the whole one-night-only thing.

How should I get over this? I still really want to see her again and get to know her.

Fandyien

I'd take this as a lesson: don't sleep with someone until you've gone on a date or three with them.

Mertzy

Thanks, Petey McBible.

Nocren

I was kinda in the same situation a few months back. Best advice I can give you is just "let it go." Not being sarcastic or anything. Just "hey, it was fun. Cool."

Sorry to hear she's not interested in anything more, but hey, you'll find someone that does eventually.

Mertzy

This is kind of on the lines of what I've been thinking, I just wanted it in words. The rest of life is good.

Thanks.

Jigrah

Alright, this is an incredibly hard situation to tackle.

What happened that night? Was alcohol a large or small factor?

Fandyien

Mertzy wrote: »

Thanks, Petey McBible.

You're welcome, individual with lack of standards who is destined to be riddled with STDs.

SatanIsMyMotor

Fandyien wrote: »

Mertzy wrote: »

Thanks, Petey McBible.

You're welcome, individual with lack of standards who is destined to be riddled with STDs.

Actually, what you said was pretty stupid and had nothing to do with the problem he posted about.

To the OP - I honestly wouldn't worry about it. Just one of those things you should probably let go.

noir_blood

Regardless of where you met her and what you did, she has your phone number and knows you would like to get together(granted, it wasn't delivered in the best way, but moving on..) if she wants to, she'll give you a call. If not, maybe she was just looking for a fun time.

Sentry

SatanIsMyMotor wrote: »

Fandyien wrote: »

Mertzy wrote: »

Thanks, Petey McBible.

You're welcome, individual with lack of standards who is destined to be riddled with STDs.

Actually, what you said was pretty stupid and had nothing to do with the problem he posted about.

To the OP - I honestly wouldn't worry about it. Just one of those things you should probably let go.

It was only stupid because of why he said it, the moral absolutism and all... but honestly, this should be a lesson to the OP not to partake in one night stands if he can't handle the emotional fall out.

A one night stand is a mutually agreed upon endevour, typically. Some people just aren't built to partake in them, and there's nothing wrong with that either. You can either seperate your emotions from the act or you can't, and if you can't, one night stands are a bad idea.

necroSYS

Pretty much just chalk it up to life experience and move on. You probably creeped her out a bit by Facebook stalking her the very morning after.

Fandyien

Sentry wrote: »

SatanIsMyMotor wrote: »

Fandyien wrote: »

Mertzy wrote: »

Thanks, Petey McBible.

You're welcome, individual with lack of standards who is destined to be riddled with STDs.

Actually, what you said was pretty stupid and had nothing to do with the problem he posted about.

To the OP - I honestly wouldn't worry about it. Just one of those things you should probably let go.

It was only stupid because of why he said it, the moral absolutism and all... but honestly, this should be a lesson to the OP not to partake in one night stands if he can't handle the emotional fall out.

A one night stand is a mutually agreed upon endevour, typically. Some people just aren't built to partake in them, and there's nothing wrong with that either. You can either seperate your emotions from the act or you can't, and if you can't, one night stands are a bad idea.

I'd just to clarify for everyone calling me stupid that I wasn't offering that from a moral point of view. I could care less who nails who and the circumstances in which said boning takes place.

I was just offering him a piece of advice - precisely the same one you're giving, only more succintly because I have not slept and am having a difficult time articulating my thoughts in a non-condescending fashion.

VisionOfClarity

necroSYS wrote: »

Pretty much just chalk it up to life experience and move on. You probably creeped her out a bit by Facebook stalking her the very morning after.

Yea, this.

Usagi

VisionOfClarity wrote: »

necroSYS wrote: »

Pretty much just chalk it up to life experience and move on. You probably creeped her out a bit by Facebook stalking her the very morning after.

Yea, this.

Yep.

Let it go.

DodgeBlan

On a positive note

the good thing about one night stands is they sometimes happen twice (assuming she travels in circles you travel in) and maybe you can just be cooler after the second time.

Waffles or whatever

Fandyien wrote: »

I'd take this as a lesson: don't sleep with someone until you've gone on a date or three with them.

Best advice ever.

Just had my first one night stand a few days ago. Decided to call her back to see where it would go. Long story short, alcohol is a requirement for that relationship.

Going off that quote again. Don't fuck anyone unless you've known them for awhile and aren't repulsed by them.

Forkes

Fandyien wrote: »

I'd take this as a lesson: don't sleep with someone until you've gone on a date or three with them.

This is actually good advice. If you are at all interested in a lasting relationship with the girl, don't sleep with her on the first date. Or night.

It's not a moral issue, it's more of a "Hey I like you, and it's not about sex."

But yeah, I'd say let it go, if she wants more she'll hit you up for it.

Pheezer

Fandyien wrote: »

Mertzy wrote: »

Thanks, Petey McBible.

You're welcome, individual with lack of standards who is destined to be riddled with STDs.

This was not appropriate.

Metalbourne

Usagi wrote: »

VisionOfClarity wrote: »

necroSYS wrote: »

Pretty much just chalk it up to life experience and move on. You probably creeped her out a bit by Facebook stalking her the very morning after.

Yea, this.

Yep.

Let it go.

Well, there was a chance that she just wasn't interested in pursuing a relationship and is avoiding attaching any strings to no-strings-attached sex.

But anyway, OP, this is the part where you sit down and think about the situation and reevaluate whether casual sex is for you. Believe me, you're not any less of a man if you don't think you can do that without getting emotionally involved.

Shogun

Metalbourne wrote: »

Usagi wrote: »

VisionOfClarity wrote: »

necroSYS wrote: »

Pretty much just chalk it up to life experience and move on. You probably creeped her out a bit by Facebook stalking her the very morning after.

Yea, this.

Yep.

Let it go.

Well, there was a chance that she just wasn't interested in pursuing a relationship and is avoiding attaching any strings to no-strings-attached sex.

But anyway, OP, this is the part where you sit down and think about the situation and reevaluate whether casual sex is for you. Believe me, you're not any less of a man if you don't think you can do that without getting emotionally involved.

dis.

It happened. Note the past tense on that. That's all its ever going to be.

Mertzy

Update for anyone interested:

Thanks for all the input you guys. I've decided to just move on and mark it off as another fun time that didn't last longer than it needed to. It was fun but it's best if we're both on the same page about it I guess.

I actually found out today from a now mutual friend of ours that she actually has a boyfriend which she failed to mention, so it's best that I didn't end up with her anyways. I'm single so I can just keep looking with what happened here in mind.