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'Whomp!' June 6, 2011 "Heavy Petting"
HugmasterGeneral
Poopmaster GeneralYobuttRegistered User regular
Poopmaster GeneralYobuttRegistered User regular
So, hi. This is my comic, 'Whomp!' I'm looking for feedback on how to make my comic art kind of... I don't know. It's the 'You know it when you see it' thing, but my lines in general feel really messy, and I feel really slow and inefficient in making anything polished. Anyway, check it out, I'd like to keep posting here 'til the end of time. I'll put all new stuff in new posts down the line, as is the common procedure.
I'll start with my latest few comics with my new character, The Supercentenarian.
Now I'll add a few other recent items. You can see anything else directly on my website.
Some of these are inked using a traditional brush pen. Others use my Wacom tablet, though I try for the same effect on both. Also you'll notice they all have a rough print feel to them. I'm really trying to capture that old newspaper printing look, as I've found KC Green to be some inspiration to me. I've begun to steer away from his style, but I still find him to be an incredible artist.
Anyhoo, have at it.
I'll start with my latest few comics with my new character, The Supercentenarian.
Now I'll add a few other recent items. You can see anything else directly on my website.
Some of these are inked using a traditional brush pen. Others use my Wacom tablet, though I try for the same effect on both. Also you'll notice they all have a rough print feel to them. I'm really trying to capture that old newspaper printing look, as I've found KC Green to be some inspiration to me. I've begun to steer away from his style, but I still find him to be an incredible artist.
Anyhoo, have at it.
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Edit: I meant to write 'Bank' in overly obvious letters on the building, but I forgot. I think it's obvious it's being robbed.
Edit2: Also, I'm aware that the commas look like periods. I edited the font to make them more comma-like, so future strips will look right. I'm really pleased with this font, though.
Edit: Fixed a typo.
Everything looks nice and clean, the third panel though seems like it could have been composed better. All the talking is crammed in the bottom while not much is going on in the top half.
Also the panels angles and views are all too similar. There's no variation. It works as it is, but it coulda been better. For example a shot from behind the girl showing a massive audience or auditorium would have added something to the strip.
I like the characters and the subject matter as its something that doesn't typically get a comic, and its just funny.
INSTAGRAM
You hit the nail on the head, sir. I'll work on that. Edit: Meant to say more on the subject. You're right that I'm uncomfortable with drawing backgrounds WHICH IS NO EXCUSE, RONNIE. DAMMIT, DUDE.
Thank you for your kind words. You're right, I cheated on the last one, and I shouldn't have. I usually sketch every frame, but I copy pasted the sketch (but used normal finishing lines.) As for it going on a few panels too long, I guess I'm obsessed with having a comic that's long enough to be worth someone's visit, but not just torrents of words in individual panels. I also like to drag the joke out a little longer than I should for awkwardness, but it definitely didn't work in this latest one (and I really felt it was one of my weaker works.)
Thank you both very much for your highly useful critique, it's very encouraging.
Newest Whomp! strip. With new and improved backgrounds!
Have you experimented at all with color?
That's absolutely what's important.
I have indeed. Up at the second and third strips I posted in the OP there was color with the halftoning (The second of the two colored ones was really bad, probably my most hated Whomp!). It's just as easy to color as it is to leave black and white, but it's definitely a preference.
I'd wager that a healthy majority of famous comics (both web and otherwise) in the world are entirely black and white (or grayscale). This is something that I really admire and seek out actively. The film 'Ed Wood' supported his admiration as well. I am consistently impressed with how great Gunshow is and only uses grayscale with halftoning, and I think I'm going to stick with that.
When done improperly, (the only way I know how) color can make a comic very tacky and visually loud.
(I'm Ronnie, that's the relevance of the strip.)
Yeah, added color to this one. I wanted that child's drawing background thing happening, so color was not optional. I really like how it turned out, though.
'The Joke Is That I'm A Weenie'
I don't quite get the last one thoOMG THERE HE IS!!!
-Alan Moore
Thank you.
The happiness robot is my favorite one. The idea that he notices little things that make people happy is great, and it's hilarious when he naïvely tries to replicate those little things.
Thank you!
I think it's inevitable that at some point, I'll have recurring popular characters from whom I get more enjoyment, but I really want it to be loosey-goosey, anything goes. I like to think of Whomp! as, not so much a contiguous universe, but the insane ramblings of a damaged mind.
The comic I'm gonna post within an hour or so is highly self-referential, and I think that is the closest I'm going to get to anything serial.
Now, I DO very much want to do a real serial comic that isn't Whomp!. I'm still working on what style I want it to be in, and what the story will actually be. I'd like to get some more practice under my belt, but I don't think any respectable artist ever thinks he's at the level he'd like to be.
This one got a bit carried away on the self-referentiality. (I assume I made up that word, so, copyright 2010 Ronnie Filyaw. Whew, protected.)
Oh no he didn't!
(Major Edit: I can't believe I forgot to color the tables. Half were brown and the other half white. I always miss something. Also, I deepened the halftoning as per Fletcher's advice in a below comment, with which I agree wholeheartedly. So, refresh if you don't see the latest image.)
No, but seriously, these are great.
ouch, my pride!
these are really good though
please keep making them!
i reckon the texture-y shading could possibly be done with slightly larger halftone or something
it could just be me, but my eyes kinda hurt of i look too closely, like it's stuck halfway between a deliberate texture pattern and jpeg artifacting
regardless i really like the drawing and the humour is juuust right
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You know, just yesterday I was thinking of how jealous I was about your work and how much people love you. Thanks a ton, Fletch.
And you say the halftoning should be heavier? That's interesting. I've been debating whether my halftone has been too heavy and offputting to people, so I've been going with something lighter. But now I know that's not the case, so I'm going back to my old style, thanks again!
(Oh, also, POKERRRRRRRR. Love your strip.)
It's a new Whomp!, y'allz.
Thanks Mister! Love the new avatar. (Your picture, not the movie.)
Unnecessary side note:
Also, thank you all for forgiving me for the copypasta frames, despite the fact that it was indeed intentional, for anyone who wasn't sure. Anything with a curve was definitely redrawn using the old lines as a guide, but a lot of the time machine is copy pasting, which is obvious. It was to illustrate the identical nature of the events as they occurred each time.
I'm sure it's a preference thing, since I like it so much, but I just wonder if there's anything else I can do to texture it in a way that doesn't make it look cliche. Just plain grayscale is really trashy, but I don't want to lose the lack of color.
Anyone have any suggestions? Or does anyone else other than me actually prefer the halftoning?
Edit: What do you people think of this?
What might you do in my position Mister? You have a strong sense of color. How could I most utilize the scale that is gray with great tact and allure?
I think you've got the right idea. I like the original moire patterns, but I completely understand where it's painful to the eyes after a while. I'd recommend trying the same pattern, but increase it's size here and there. As in, don't use it uniformly for the whole comic. Try a larger version of the moire pattern for large surface areas, like the ground.