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I recently started a webcomic

endlessorigamiendlessorigami Registered User new member
edited October 2010 in Artist's Corner
I don't really know where I should post this, but I wanted to share my webcomic with fans of Penny Arcade

check it out:
http://www.endlessorigami.blogspot.com/

which_came_first.png

endlessorigami on

Posts

  • amateurhouramateurhour One day I'll be professionalhour The woods somewhere in TennesseeRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    Alright..

    You have more than one comic on your site. Please don't just post one here and then link your site. It either looks like you're just site whoring by barely skirting the rules or that you only have one comic drawn and you're already looking for feedback. It's going to make a lot of people not click your site, and this advice is coming from someone who made a LOT of mistakes trying to showcase his (failed, but soon to be reborn) comic in the past.

    Moving past that...

    Your art style is super simple, but really nice in my opinion. However if you're going to have a simple art style, your writing has to be fucking amazing, and unfortunately it's not. This one though made me laugh...

    trust_fall.png

    Also, I'd stay away from color strips. This one looks like it doesn't belong and it doesn't match the art style of your other strips.

    drive_Pies.png

    Okay, these two made me laugh a little too, but both of them need some work. The first one shouldn't have the grandpa, and the second should have something besides just the graph...

    fuckitlist.png

    the_renaissance.jpg

    You're not terrible. I get kind of a Cyanide and Happiness meets XKCD meets PBF vibe, which means it's a little confusing because your writing and joke telling varies a lot from strip to strip. Keep at it though. I feel like some of your jokes are super safe and some are super dirty, you should find a happy medium and try to stick to that.

    On a more website critical note, you've got a fair amount of comics. Wordpress, with either webcomic + inkblot, comicpress, or stripShow (which I prefer) are free and web hosting with a domain name is less than $100 a year now. I'd move your stuff over to a dedicated site with a better layout since you don't seem to have problems updating regularly, which is a really good thing.

    Good luck!

    amateurhour on
    are YOU on the beer list?
  • WassermeloneWassermelone Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    [pedantic]That Venn Diagram doesn't make any sense.

    You could put in the overlap "Cool things I know about the Renaissance" because that would be a subset of "What I know".[/pedantic]

    Wassermelone on
    http://steamcommunity.com/id/wassemelone
  • tynictynic PICNIC BADASS Registered User, ClubPA regular
    edited October 2010
    Or if you're actually trying to make a joke, the big one could be "Information about the renaissance" and then the overlap would be "what I know about the renaissance". But it's still not very funny. Plus, Venn diagram comics are a dime a dozen.

    tynic on
    phots on my flickr pics on my tumblr
  • MagicToasterMagicToaster JapanRegistered User regular
    edited October 2010
    A morman chick? Shouldn't it be mormon?

    MagicToaster on
  • EWomEWom Registered User regular
    edited October 2010
    A lot of your jokes seem very dated. I mean, you did a joke about 1992.

    EWom on
    Whether they find a life there or not, I think Jupiter should be called an enemy planet.
  • endlessorigamiendlessorigami Registered User new member
    edited October 2010
    amateurhour wrote: »
    Alright..

    You have more than one comic on your site. Please don't just post one here and then link your site. It either looks like you're just site whoring by barely skirting the rules or that you only have one comic drawn and you're already looking for feedback. It's going to make a lot of people not click your site, and this advice is coming from someone who made a LOT of mistakes trying to showcase his (failed, but soon to be reborn) comic in the past.

    Moving past that...

    Your art style is super simple, but really nice in my opinion. However if you're going to have a simple art style, your writing has to be fucking amazing, and unfortunately it's not. This one though made me laugh...

    trust_fall.png

    Also, I'd stay away from color strips. This one looks like it doesn't belong and it doesn't match the art style of your other strips.

    drive_Pies.png

    Okay, these two made me laugh a little too, but both of them need some work. The first one shouldn't have the grandpa, and the second should have something besides just the graph...

    fuckitlist.png

    the_renaissance.jpg

    You're not terrible. I get kind of a Cyanide and Happiness meets XKCD meets PBF vibe, which means it's a little confusing because your writing and joke telling varies a lot from strip to strip. Keep at it though. I feel like some of your jokes are super safe and some are super dirty, you should find a happy medium and try to stick to that.

    On a more website critical note, you've got a fair amount of comics. Wordpress, with either webcomic + inkblot, comicpress, or stripShow (which I prefer) are free and web hosting with a domain name is less than $100 a year now. I'd move your stuff over to a dedicated site with a better layout since you don't seem to have problems updating regularly, which is a really good thing.

    Good luck!

    Thanks for the in depth critique it really helps.

    endlessorigami on
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