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Four words you'll hear in jail
Darth Waiter
Elrond HubbardMordor XenuRegistered User regular
Elrond HubbardMordor XenuRegistered User regular
So, my roommate and I had a fun little discussion about what could possibly happen if the pair of us got into a rousing round of drinking
and then fisticuffs
possibly with some of this
that
or the other....
Inevitably, the subject of incarceration arose
and we decided that there are a series of phrases you definitely want to hear when you wake up in the drunk tank next to your buddy, words of wisdom, warning and survvial; now, some of you may be saying, "Deedubs, why only four words?"
I'll tell you why:
1. You're still drunk or likely hung over; many words at once are confusing.
2. You don't want to attract the attention of the guards; surreptitious conversation is the only way the screws won't catch you.
3. Fewer words make you look tougher, scarier and less likely to be a sex toy for a 300 lb. Crip named Daisy.
4. That's the rules; if you want five words, go right ahead and make your own thread, but you'll be a copying copyface.
For starters:
- "He's got a shank!"
- "Quick! Make a shank!"
- "I'll protect your ass."
- "Don't drink the wine."
- "Don't drop the soap."
- "Don't look at dicks."
But, let's not forget the phrase with the highest probability of being uttered upon awakening in the pokey:
- "Dude, what the fuck?"
And yes, Donald Duck is staring at that stripper's ass.
and then fisticuffs
possibly with some of this
that
or the other....
Inevitably, the subject of incarceration arose
and we decided that there are a series of phrases you definitely want to hear when you wake up in the drunk tank next to your buddy, words of wisdom, warning and survvial; now, some of you may be saying, "Deedubs, why only four words?"
I'll tell you why:
1. You're still drunk or likely hung over; many words at once are confusing.
2. You don't want to attract the attention of the guards; surreptitious conversation is the only way the screws won't catch you.
3. Fewer words make you look tougher, scarier and less likely to be a sex toy for a 300 lb. Crip named Daisy.
4. That's the rules; if you want five words, go right ahead and make your own thread, but you'll be a copying copyface.
For starters:
- "He's got a shank!"
- "Quick! Make a shank!"
- "I'll protect your ass."
- "Don't drink the wine."
- "Don't drop the soap."
- "Don't look at dicks."
But, let's not forget the phrase with the highest probability of being uttered upon awakening in the pokey:
- "Dude, what the fuck?"
And yes, Donald Duck is staring at that stripper's ass.
Darth Waiter on
0
Posts
"You gonna get raped."
Secret Satan 2013 Wishlist
or
'oh no! in prison!!'
martha stewarts vacation prison?
You're doing it wrong
Dear satan I wish for this or maybe some of this....oh and I'm a medium or a large.
edit: this is funny cause im in jail now and this is something i would say
or
Hey, those aren't boobs!
Next time, on the Rocky and Bullwinkle show!
"Welcome back, Darth Waiter."
Good to see you.
edit: I missed ya'll too.
edit: They don't allow bees
Coran Attack!
best possible response