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Best 5 Seconds of Her Life! (nsfw)
alt_oids
Registered User new member
Registered User new member
Background: I was a virgin (24 years old) until recently. Started dating a girl, asked her out, etc etc and ended up having relations with her after a few weeks.
This is perfectly fine with me, except that I seem to be unable to last more than a few minutes (<2-3) in bed. I feel like I have no control whatsoever, and the couple of times that we tried to have a second go at it, I was able to become erect but it went away once I tried to slip on the condom again. I feel like I'm not doing a very good job satisfying her, and while she has been encouraging, I can also feel her frustration.
I've tried going more slowly and tried to keep my mind occupied on other things to slow down the ejaculation, but the only thing that that accomplished was me losing the erection. A large portion of that was probably just mental; I felt a bit stressed out about "performing" and such and felt a lot of pressure.
So........I'd like to ask you kind folks for tips/suggestions on how I might last longer in bed and what I can do to maximize her pleasure? She's had other partners before, so she's a bit more experience than I am.
This is perfectly fine with me, except that I seem to be unable to last more than a few minutes (<2-3) in bed. I feel like I have no control whatsoever, and the couple of times that we tried to have a second go at it, I was able to become erect but it went away once I tried to slip on the condom again. I feel like I'm not doing a very good job satisfying her, and while she has been encouraging, I can also feel her frustration.
I've tried going more slowly and tried to keep my mind occupied on other things to slow down the ejaculation, but the only thing that that accomplished was me losing the erection. A large portion of that was probably just mental; I felt a bit stressed out about "performing" and such and felt a lot of pressure.
So........I'd like to ask you kind folks for tips/suggestions on how I might last longer in bed and what I can do to maximize her pleasure? She's had other partners before, so she's a bit more experience than I am.
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One piece of advice is to masturbate sometime beforehand. Maybe 8-12 hours? So when you're in bed, you have the stamina but you also aren't going to lose your erection either.
Another? Try doing male Kegels exercises. When you go to the bathroom, stop urinating completely. Hold it for a few seconds and then release. Do that several times each time you take a piss. Indeed, this is supposed to help you suppress the rush of an orgasm and thus maximize your endurance.
Particularly: "Your fingers never ejaculate and your forearms never go soft."
Relax and don't worry.
The cuddling part is also awesome if you guys have time to spend.
whiskey dick ain't a myth
The difference for me between lasting 10-15 minutes and 2 hours is:
a.) Pacing, there's no rule that says after penetration you just have to hump like a machine. Back off, slow it down, don't move for a few seconds.
b.) Lube, without lube things go much quicker, which isn't always bad. In the event it's lasting a while, re-application of lube is usually needed.
c.) Her positioning and what she's doing. There's a lot to be said about HER involvement in how quickly you get off, if you're trying to pace yourself and she keeps doing "that one thing" that gets you off way quick, tell her to to hold on, to do that later.
I think he needs to try different positions, some angles are more sensitive than others.
edit: Yes the excitement of just having sex will wear off so far as super-anxiety, that comes with time. Then the real fun stuff begins.
Kegel exercises are a fine suggestion, but be careful. Stopping urination will help identify the muscle, but don't do the exercises while peeing, because that will possibly lead to urinary tract infections. Instead, just do that once maybe to identify the muscle, and then do the kegels anytime other than while peeing--you can be doing them at work or in class and nobody will know!
Pretty much spot on.
This is some great advise.
My best advice is to breathe. Sex is a lot like working out and I find that if I just maintain a good, steady breathing pattern it becomes easier to last. What I think it is is that it helps me calm down and not focus so much on the orgasm feeling and more on just having fun.
Remember though you don't have to last for 15mins or more every time. The average sexually encounter lasts 11 minutes so I've heard. Just try to have fun, maybe use some thicker condoms, and relax, it will help.
I'm gonna agree with this. And add a little bit of my own.
Once you're done, don't just roll off of her and go to sleep. Just cause you got yours doesn't mean it's all over.
And don't stress on pleasing her at all. Women are harder to please, but what I've come to find is that the more effort you put into it the better it is for them. They get their pleasure from the mood, environment, and such. A penis just needs to be touched and it's usually good to go. A woman needs more than that. So focusing too much on physical stimulation isn't always going to get the job done.
I remember my first time lasting less than a minute. I've been with my fiance for 2 1/2 years roughly and we've been sexually active the whole time with one another. And even now on occasion I'll have trouble lasting longer than a few minutes. But there are times I'll be going at it for 20 minutes or so. The penis is a strange thing.
And as far as losing your erection, you're probably right about the stress part. I'm sure most of it is you putting a lot of pressure on yourself and just over-thinking it. So just calm down, take it as it goes, and communicate with your girl about it. Find out what she likes, doesn't like, and what she's interested in trying. It'll make both of your experiences much better.
Good luck and have fun.
Your dick is not the star of the show.
Make it about her and you can't go wrong.
basically;
you know how you squeeze to stop peeing?
do that when you are near finishing while jerkin it. not too late though, you should be able to "catch" it
lots of that
If you follow this tack, don't drink too much. It can prevent you from getting it up at all.
water spirals the wrong way out the sink