Spectre-x wrote: »
Some problems I have with your comics:
They're really tiny. They're very small and you draw things very small so it's hard to tell what's going on because everything's so very, very tiny.
Your drawings are also very murky and scratchy, with inconsistently-drawn characters. You don't really know how to use contrast between light and dark, so it's hard to tell what's going on because it's hard to tell what the shape of anything is. All of your comics that I have seen so far are like some magic eye thing. I have to look at them and turn my head a bit and squint and focus and unfocus at random intervals to try and figure out what's going on.
And it's too bad that you don't plan on making any changes to that Quick & the Dead thing, because it is almost completely indecipherable at the moment. As Iruka said, they look like they're five feet apart. What's the guy's arm doing in panel four? Turning into a feather duster? Exploding? Vibrating at supersonic speeds? What's he doing with it in the last panel? Is that even how you use a gun or are you inventing a series of actions based on things you have half-remembered from westerns where people use guns that function in a completely different manner? Is the guy who threw the grenade the same guy as the one with the shotgun? Because we need a magnifying glass to tell if this is the case. Other than a grin and a scratch of about three pixels in size there is no way to tell if they are the same guy whatsoever.
What's the grenade doing there? Why was it thrown? If it's to try and kill the first guy, why isn't he diving out of the way instead of drawing his gun, or raising his semiautomatic which he has to cock for some reason to shoot the guy with the shotgun which he also has to cock even though the real shotgun it resembles most is also a semiautomatic? Nothing about the comic makes sense. Hell, the guys seem to even be moving at drastically different speeds.
We can't even tell what they're doing because, again, it's too dark, tiny and messy to properly make out anyone's actions on the page. The guy's hands in the final panel are also wildly different sizes. There's no real flow to people's actions, they look like they're posing for a painting or something. They're not even posing in the middle of actions, but they look like they're posing in between seperate actions. The eyes don't flow naturally from panel to panel, it's hard to tell that they're supposed to be part of a narrative besides the fact that they're on the same page. So it's that, plus your comics have no real internal logic that I can figure out.
I'm sorry, but these are just a huge, indecipherable mess. You need to work on cohesion within the page, cleaning up your stuff so we can tell what's going on, consistensy, flow, gestures, basically everything. Have you read Making Comics yet? By Scott McCloud? I know Understanding Comics was a revelation for you, but Making Comics would benefit you even more, on account of how it deals with all of the many, many issues that plague your comics at the moment.
Finally, I'm baffled by the joke in your Randy Savage comic. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it. Is it the fact that he takes viagra at all? That's not much of a joke. Is it the way viagra is portrayed? Okay, but then you don't need the last panel and you could put in a panel somewhere earlier to provide us with better build-up. Is it the fact that he can only last for three minutes? But he just took viagra. Is it the joke that he can only last for three minutes despite having taken viagra? It's just incredibly confusing. It's like you're trying out all kinds of different elements from all kinds of different possible jokes, but none of these elements really reinforce each other or even have anything to do with each other besides the basic premise of "viagra".
My fav is when I can get my kiss on with other dudes.
Rolo wrote: »
much better ninj!
keep it up!
you might want to try Loomis' "Figure Drawing for All It's Worth" as well, it tends to get to the point a little bit faster than his other books and most of the lessons are self-contained so you don't need to do all that much reading
IDK what a dip pen even is
Iruka wrote: »
don't forget to try and draw from life...
Iruka wrote: »
The inks don't look bad for a first go at it. Inking takes a looong time to get good at, its a skill I need to spend more time on.
Your jesters finger is blending into its head, you probably want to move that hand over.
I think your shape studies are going in the right direction. Try experimenting with your shading. Cycle through a bunch of different motions (little slow circles, very light sweeping strokes, things like that) Shading with the form will also help (AOBs image here:
That's because that's exactly what I did well sort of. I use a freakin huge brush, and then nudge it with the erasure tool randomly. I'm not quite sure how people get such neat forms otherwise.
I think you need to be patient, Ninjai. It can take years and years to improve. Don't worry that you're not at the skill level you want to be at yet. Just keep on practicing.