chiasaur11Never doubt a raccoon.Do you think it's trademarked?Registered Userregular
edited March 2011
X-Com aquatic division debriefing: Disruptor field test #1.
Officially, I am incredibly disappointed with all of you.
Civilians died while you ran, doing minimal damage to the enemy infrastructure.
Unofficially, and off the record, this was a success. We killed 2 of the enemy's best soldiers in the midst of a hostile ambush and our entire strike force successfully extracted without injuries or fatalities, despite continually psychic trauma, bombardment with high explosives, and a prime position to tear our forces to shreds. Further, the new weapon systems performed effectively in combat conditions.
Further evaluation will follow. For now, good work.
In light of these findings and a rapidly expanding operations base, promotions seem merited.
Commander Rankenphile will be in overall command of Acheron's field operations, while Captain Campion will direct Charon.
Ensign Nocren, meanwhile, has demonstrated clear command potential that cannot be ignored, in spite of his protests.
The remainder of the promotions are primarily to ensure a reliable command structure at Charon in the event of Campion's untimely demise or incapacitation.
No, for me X-Com is always "there will be a lot of deaths and hopefully more on the side of the enemy".
So I shudder at the thought of withdrawing...
But then again, I have no strategic talents, I will never be anything more than a Corporal ;-)
We'll see what the Director will have in store for me, only he has "the great master plan".
chiasaur11Never doubt a raccoon.Do you think it's trademarked?Registered Userregular
edited April 2011
X-Com status update:
URGENT
Something's coming in. Big silhouette. And the entire contact team is out on a mission.
Might pass over, might be nothing.
But every engineer, scientist, and member of the repair crew with any experience with firearms is to report to the armory immediately. Prototypes from the weapons lab are to be readied for deployment.
Once again, this may not be an issue, but with no active combat personnel available, we cannot afford to be sloppy.
Something's coming in. Big silhouette. And the entire contact team is out on a mission.
Might pass over, might be nothing.
But every engineer, scientist, and member of the repair crew with any experience with firearms is to report to the armory immediately. Prototypes from the weapons lab are to be readied for deployment.
Once again, this may not be an issue, but with no active combat personnel available, we cannot afford to be sloppy.
Chiasaur11
Director, X-Com aquatic branch.
Sounds a little like my brother's first day on duty above ground...
Actually, I guess some of the best soldiers were on station at the time, so this sounds much, much worse. Much worse.
The enemy is inside the base already. My office is in lockdown mode, as are a few others throughout the base, but there's only so long we can hold out.
Dammit. Never should have sent the whole force out. Should have left an emergency garrison.
Should have left something. They tore through the first defenders in seconds. Seconds.
Send backup. Someone.
Anyone.
This is not a drill, I repeat, this is not a drill.
Oh crap, it's not looking good. Maybe the tanks can defend the base until everyone can get back?
elliotw2 on
XBL:Elliotw3|PSN:elliotw2
0
chiasaur11Never doubt a raccoon.Do you think it's trademarked?Registered Userregular
edited April 2011
X-COM PRIORITY TRANSMISSION
Requesting aid! Rpeat, requesting aid!
...shit. Nobody's coming, are they?
If the aliens aren't idiots, they were jamming our transmissions from the start.
Might as well make this a last record. Who knows? Somebody might find it.
We tried. God knows we tried. Things came from the depths to doom humanity, we fought back.
We died fighting back, half the time. We ran with our tails between our legs, as often as not.
And all the same, we thought we could do some good. Hell, we thought we were doing good.
All we were doing was drawing the attention of beings infinitely greater than humanity.
Eventually, they responded.
I have no idea what happened to the field team, or the other facility. I can hope they survived, but it would be a temporary survival. They will come for all of us.
The ramshackle defenses we arranged fell quickly. Ghost and Phoenix were torn to shreds in the hallways. They were lucky.
The science teams.... they changed. I had to stop watching before I could see the full extent, but they were... harvested. No, that isn't right. They harvested themselves, building housings for their parts. Those who resisted were torn to pieces by those who did not. They were screaming. I couldn't hear it, but they were screaming all the same. They shouldn't be able to do it. Screaming should stop when the breathing stops, shouldn't it?
I'm babbling. The important thing is that they're gone. Worse than gone, they joined the enemy. They're pounding on the door now, and all I'm getting from the monitors is static.
No, there's blood now, they're filling with blood. It's dripping out.
It's beautiful.
No, it's not just beautiful, it's singing. Blood doesn't sing, does it?
But it's singing, and it should sing. It's a beautiful song, a falling kind of song.
A drowning kind of song. But it drifts.
It's outside the door now.
I shouldn't open the door. There's something bad outside the door. But if I don't open the door, the singing will stop.
I think I'll open the door for a second. It couldn't hurt anything.
Librarian's ghostLibrarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSporkRegistered Userregular
edited April 2011
Lt. Ghost pulled the shredded remains of Pheonix behind him, another of the aliens appeared around a corner and the pilot let loose a volley from his Xcom laser pistol. The pistol could easily breach the base walls and depressurize whole pods. He was beyond caring.
He'd been hit by the same blast that had nailed Pheonix, but Pheonix and taken the brunt of the shots. Ghost had pulled himself from under the unconscious Pheonix moments after the attackers had swept over them. He could hear shooting from somewhere in the base, but what had happened to the rest of the personnel was now not the pilot's concern. The alien went down under the volley of laser bolts and Ghost finished dragging Pheonix into the hanger.
"Almost there buddy," he muttered to his silent friend. Ghost found the submersible hanger trashed. The second Barracuda attack sub was nothing but a blackened shell, but miraculously, Ghost's own craft sat unharmed amongst the bodies of the slain hanger crew and mechanics. He pulled Pheonix inside the cockpit and began running preflight when shots started to slam against the hull. Looking up, Ghost could see a whole squad of aliens rush into the room. Without a word, Ghost slammed the hatch closed and flooded his ballast as fast as the pumps would go. Slowly, to slowly for ghost, submarine sank out of the hanger.
Pulling away from base, Ghost set course for the closest shore, ready to raise anyone at Wubble Woo to get the word out and get help. As the Barracuda powered to full Ghost relaxed in the pilot's seat right as he saw it. A crack. Small, impossibly small. Ghost didn't know if it had been cause by the weapons fire or falling debris from the hanger massacre, but it was there. Before his very eyes the crack began to spider across the cockpit bubble speeded by the water pressure outside. Ghost blew his ballast to make it to the surface as fast as he could. He checked his gauges and glanced back at the crack. He probably wouldn't, make it. He readied the emergency beacon and took a look and Phoenix, laying bloody and in a coma behind him.
Ghost hated the idea of being killed by suffocation. With a sigh he checked his pistol and waited. He watched his depth gauge drop and the crack increase. It was a race. One he probably would not win.
They don't care about computers. They may not even know. I don't want to be alone again.
I couldn't help. I haven't had a tank to use for weeks. I'm blind now, but I wish it had happened earlier. I can't even delete the files, as my directives mandate retaining all potentially tactically useful data. The best I can do is archive i**
** Procedure Interrupt
**
Directives. That's it. Systems Diagnositic:
Memory Check: 1024GB **
System override. Manual check initiated.
**
Reactor control system status: * * * * system timeout
Backup control system status: * * backup controls online: Efficiency 37%
Zrbite levels: Acceptable
Base self destruct engage: Authorization code: >_%63%61%6E%27%74%63%6F%75%6E%74%3A%29%3A%29
Countdown initiated. Have a nice day!
...you xeno scum. 5
4
I've saved all the data I could to my black box. There wasn't room for me. 3
I won't be coming back this time. 2
O~/Put him in a bed with the captain's daughter
ear-lai in the morning.. 1
Seemed appropriate I guess 0
chiasaur11Never doubt a raccoon.Do you think it's trademarked?Registered Userregular
edited April 2011
X-Com archives: Hostile attack on shipping facility.
Exact times lost due to chronological conflicts (see incident report 34-R, Aquatic Combat division) Only order of events can be confirmed with any real accuracy.
Event 1: Contact made with with hostiles. Data begins offsite transmission for safekeeping.
Event 2: X-Com contact team
arrives.
Commander of ground forces loudly announces that "Alien fucks" are about to wish "Their filthy mothers" had not been such "whores". Transcription not exact, but all surviving sources confirm the speech was "unspeakably vile".
Event 3: Contact team begins attack on hostiles, with the attached mobile armed platform isolating several armed alien life forms.
Event 4: Several hostiles begin behaving abnormally. Contact team apparently begins discussion of an "odd transmission" from Acheron salvage facility. Lt. Nocren is quoted as saying "Look. You can toss all the stars and bars on me you like. I'm still a grunt at heart, and that means I will never have any idea what the hell is going on. I just shoot things" Lt. Raneados responded with, according to multiple sources "Go outside then"
Event 5:X-Com agents EnglishBob, Bursar, and Nocren begin dispersal from craft. Contact made with further hostiles. [/url]
So, this was all an April Fools joke right Chiasaur?
Right? Chia?
I... too, was kidding.
Tofystedeth on
0
chiasaur11Never doubt a raccoon.Do you think it's trademarked?Registered Userregular
edited April 2011
Event 6:
Further contacts.
Discussion continues regarding lack of contact with Acheron. Acting director is described as a "Monday Morning quarterback, no question". "Glad he's not harassing us" Jocular comments continue.
One of the recruits mentions this would leave Commander Rankenphile in charge.
chiasaur11Never doubt a raccoon.Do you think it's trademarked?Registered Userregular
edited April 2011
Event 8: Following further failed attempts to contact command structure, Lt. Nocren loudly states he intends to have a "Turkey shoot" and asks fellow operatives to "line up a couple tangos for me"
He fails to terminate any of the targets, despite their unarmed state.
Upon realizing this, he indulges in bitter mock laughter, and calls the dodging of the hostiles "Funny stuff, assholes". He further mentions he still is "near the top of the killboard", when up against aliens with a goal "beyond making me look bad".
Commander Rankenfile curses something called an "MC Disruptor" loudly at this time for being a "piece of shit" that "can't make a goddamn alien choke itself with its own fucking intestines like that's so much to ask"
With no response from the main base Acheron or the fielded units in 24 hours, Captain Campion set it upon himself to investigate the situation. With Iolo, Imperfect, Weasel, Smokestacks, Valve, and Mum; he set off from Charon. With the help of medication and days away from any conflict the voices had subsided; but when team Charon was within an hour away from the base, suited and ready to go, the clicking began again. The clicking voices talked louder than before, and as they approached, louder than ever. There was only one reasonable solution in Campion's mind. Kill them all, and he did. With a Sonic Cannon, Campion turned his entire team to gravy, and it was delicious. Eating his fill, he decided to go out for a swim, forgetting to put his helmet back, he was instantly crushed by the pressure.
Campion on
4484-7718-8470
0
chiasaur11Never doubt a raccoon.Do you think it's trademarked?Registered Userregular
edited April 2011
Event 10: Nocren continues to fail in his attempts to neutralize hostiles.
Meanwhile, EnglishBob and Bursar eliminate multiple contacts
Event 11:
Nocren fails to eliminate a contact at point blank range, begins cursing profusely.
Event 12: Alien, apparently due to outside prompting, attempts to strangle Lt. Nocren. Commander Rankenphile continues to swear, but in a more upbeat manner.
Librarian's ghostLibrarian, Ghostbuster, and TimSporkRegistered Userregular
edited April 2011
So hey guys you should hear about these weird dreams I had. Everyone got killed and I forgot about my buddy the AI when I heroically went for help. Crazy huh? Well good thing it was all a dream.
While we patiently await our next episode, and as we valiantly struggle against the overloaded servers, I was wondering if anyone would be willing to share their tales of the first time in an X-Com game their base was invaded? I'll start us off.
Terror from the Deep was actually my first X-Com game. My friend lent it to me (I was, like, 12 at the time) and it didn't come with a manual so I pretty much muddled through. Approximately 3/4 of the way into the game things are going swimmingly when, hello, my base is being invaded.
I had left a few extremely under-equipped soldiers back at base because, heh, I didn't have enough room to bring them with me. Queue the most difficult, painful hour of my life as I guard their lives carefully and agonize over the toss of every grenade. Then, holding my breath as a squaddie runs out to pick up a fallen, stronger weapon to get an edge on the attackers.
I lived, but it was a clusterfuck so I essentially lost. But SO MUCH FUN, couldn't stop talking about it to my friends for days. Then they told me about ways to organize you base so invasions weren't such a big deal. Booo.
Posts
Officially, I am incredibly disappointed with all of you.
Civilians died while you ran, doing minimal damage to the enemy infrastructure.
Unofficially, and off the record, this was a success. We killed 2 of the enemy's best soldiers in the midst of a hostile ambush and our entire strike force successfully extracted without injuries or fatalities, despite continually psychic trauma, bombardment with high explosives, and a prime position to tear our forces to shreds. Further, the new weapon systems performed effectively in combat conditions.
Further evaluation will follow. For now, good work.
Why I fear the ocean.
Commander Campion-11
Lt. Rankenfile-8
Ensign Nocren-8
Lt. Raneados-5
Ensign Mr. Mojo-5
Ensign Imperfect-2
Ensign EnglishBob-2
AB Zahrkon (dec) - 8
AB Docken (dec)-2
Recruit Melding (dec)-2
AB Phoenix-D (dec)-2
Ensign BloodySloth(dec)-1
Petty Officer OnTheLastCastle (dec)-1
AB Rainfall(dec) -1
AB Orikashagae (dec)-1
Recruit Staleghoti(dec)-1
LostProphet AI platform-6
Tofystedeth AI platform-6
Pilot killboard:
Lt. Timspork's Ghost (6 USOs, 9 confirmed kills)
RisenPhoenix (3 USO, 3 confirmed kills)
In light of these findings and a rapidly expanding operations base, promotions seem merited.
Commander Rankenphile will be in overall command of Acheron's field operations, while Captain Campion will direct Charon.
Ensign Nocren, meanwhile, has demonstrated clear command potential that cannot be ignored, in spite of his protests.
The remainder of the promotions are primarily to ensure a reliable command structure at Charon in the event of Campion's untimely demise or incapacitation.
Why I fear the ocean.
I'd like to be placed on the Kill or Die list, and not on the Nancy Pamby Runaway Cowards list.
I am soldier, and I am expected to kill or die. And honestly, all this running away makes me sick to my stomach.
If this means I am being sent on my own towards a Lobsterman base, so be it.
At least I tried fighting.
Your sincerely,
Corporal Carl
What's the matter Carl? Not like taking part in a LetsNotPlay?
So I shudder at the thought of withdrawing...
But then again, I have no strategic talents, I will never be anything more than a Corporal ;-)
We'll see what the Director will have in store for me, only he has "the great master plan".
P.S. Love the Magic Knight avatar :winky:
...
He's in CHARGE now?
Just wait till I actually get to shoot at some aliens!
The Division, Warframe (XB1)
GT: Tanith 6227
At Acheron Base, thank the Almighty.
Steam: Elvenshae // PSN: Elvenshae // WotC: Elvenshae
Wilds of Aladrion: [https://forums.penny-arcade.com/discussion/comment/43159014/#Comment_43159014]Ellandryn[/url]
Not sure who should be more terrified by this, us or those alien bastards.
I'm never gonna get any sleep.
The Division, Warframe (XB1)
GT: Tanith 6227
With a recent windfall, we have been able to purchase a Barracuda attack craft to dissuade hostile action towards Charon.
Lt. BlitzAce 1981, report to Charon facility for processing and basic training. Good luck.
Chiasaur11
Director, X-Com aquatic branch.
Why I fear the ocean.
All that flight school training (and incidental time in the neighbouring pub) wasted.
I never finish anyth
Bad news.
We have another reported hostile attack. One of our shipping facilities in South America.
It seems we're being left to die on the vine. I am not fond of the prospect.
Get in, and neutralize all hostiles by any means necessary.
Oh, and if possible, leave the shipping facilities something less than entirely destroyed.
Chiasaur11
Director, X-Com aquatic branch.
Why I fear the ocean.
URGENT
Something's coming in. Big silhouette. And the entire contact team is out on a mission.
Might pass over, might be nothing.
But every engineer, scientist, and member of the repair crew with any experience with firearms is to report to the armory immediately. Prototypes from the weapons lab are to be readied for deployment.
Once again, this may not be an issue, but with no active combat personnel available, we cannot afford to be sloppy.
Chiasaur11
Director, X-Com aquatic branch.
Why I fear the ocean.
Sounds a little like my brother's first day on duty above ground...
Actually, I guess some of the best soldiers were on station at the time, so this sounds much, much worse. Much worse.
Steam profile.
Getting started with BATTLETECH: Part 1 / Part 2
Are they coming?
Mary will be so happy!
She will have new sheep now! (Unless those robed people gives me some of them to eat and make clothes out of, they are very kind people.)
Requesting reinforcement, repeat, requesting reinforcement!
The enemy is inside the base already. My office is in lockdown mode, as are a few others throughout the base, but there's only so long we can hold out.
Dammit. Never should have sent the whole force out. Should have left an emergency garrison.
Should have left something. They tore through the first defenders in seconds. Seconds.
Send backup. Someone.
Anyone.
This is not a drill, I repeat, this is not a drill.
Why I fear the ocean.
Handmade Jewelry by me on EtsyGames for sale
Me on Twitch!
Steam profile.
Getting started with BATTLETECH: Part 1 / Part 2
Requesting aid! Rpeat, requesting aid!
...shit. Nobody's coming, are they?
If the aliens aren't idiots, they were jamming our transmissions from the start.
Might as well make this a last record. Who knows? Somebody might find it.
We tried. God knows we tried. Things came from the depths to doom humanity, we fought back.
We died fighting back, half the time. We ran with our tails between our legs, as often as not.
And all the same, we thought we could do some good. Hell, we thought we were doing good.
All we were doing was drawing the attention of beings infinitely greater than humanity.
Eventually, they responded.
I have no idea what happened to the field team, or the other facility. I can hope they survived, but it would be a temporary survival. They will come for all of us.
The ramshackle defenses we arranged fell quickly. Ghost and Phoenix were torn to shreds in the hallways. They were lucky.
The science teams.... they changed. I had to stop watching before I could see the full extent, but they were... harvested. No, that isn't right. They harvested themselves, building housings for their parts. Those who resisted were torn to pieces by those who did not. They were screaming. I couldn't hear it, but they were screaming all the same. They shouldn't be able to do it. Screaming should stop when the breathing stops, shouldn't it?
I'm babbling. The important thing is that they're gone. Worse than gone, they joined the enemy. They're pounding on the door now, and all I'm getting from the monitors is static.
No, there's blood now, they're filling with blood. It's dripping out.
It's beautiful.
No, it's not just beautiful, it's singing. Blood doesn't sing, does it?
But it's singing, and it should sing. It's a beautiful song, a falling kind of song.
A drowning kind of song. But it drifts.
It's outside the door now.
I shouldn't open the door. There's something bad outside the door. But if I don't open the door, the singing will stop.
I think I'll open the door for a second. It couldn't hurt anything.
Why I fear the ocean.
God help us all.
He'd been hit by the same blast that had nailed Pheonix, but Pheonix and taken the brunt of the shots. Ghost had pulled himself from under the unconscious Pheonix moments after the attackers had swept over them. He could hear shooting from somewhere in the base, but what had happened to the rest of the personnel was now not the pilot's concern. The alien went down under the volley of laser bolts and Ghost finished dragging Pheonix into the hanger.
"Almost there buddy," he muttered to his silent friend. Ghost found the submersible hanger trashed. The second Barracuda attack sub was nothing but a blackened shell, but miraculously, Ghost's own craft sat unharmed amongst the bodies of the slain hanger crew and mechanics. He pulled Pheonix inside the cockpit and began running preflight when shots started to slam against the hull. Looking up, Ghost could see a whole squad of aliens rush into the room. Without a word, Ghost slammed the hatch closed and flooded his ballast as fast as the pumps would go. Slowly, to slowly for ghost, submarine sank out of the hanger.
Pulling away from base, Ghost set course for the closest shore, ready to raise anyone at Wubble Woo to get the word out and get help. As the Barracuda powered to full Ghost relaxed in the pilot's seat right as he saw it. A crack. Small, impossibly small. Ghost didn't know if it had been cause by the weapons fire or falling debris from the hanger massacre, but it was there. Before his very eyes the crack began to spider across the cockpit bubble speeded by the water pressure outside. Ghost blew his ballast to make it to the surface as fast as he could. He checked his gauges and glanced back at the crack. He probably wouldn't, make it. He readied the emergency beacon and took a look and Phoenix, laying bloody and in a coma behind him.
Ghost hated the idea of being killed by suffocation. With a sigh he checked his pistol and waited. He watched his depth gauge drop and the crack increase. It was a race. One he probably would not win.
Ghost!
You said you wouldn't leave me Ghost.
They don't care about computers. They may not even know. I don't want to be alone again.
I couldn't help. I haven't had a tank to use for weeks. I'm blind now, but I wish it had happened earlier. I can't even delete the files, as my directives mandate retaining all potentially tactically useful data. The best I can do is archive i**
**
Procedure Interrupt
**
Directives. That's it.
Systems Diagnositic:
Memory Check: 1024GB **
System override. Manual check initiated.
**
Reactor control system status: * * * * system timeout
Backup control system status: * * backup controls online: Efficiency 37%
Zrbite levels: Acceptable
Base self destruct engage: Authorization code: >_%63%61%6E%27%74%63%6F%75%6E%74%3A%29%3A%29
Countdown initiated. Have a nice day!
...you xeno scum.
5
4
I've saved all the data I could to my black box. There wasn't room for me.
3
I won't be coming back this time.
2
O~/Put him in a bed with the captain's daughter
ear-lai in the morning..
1
Seemed appropriate I guess
0
Right? Chia?
Exact times lost due to chronological conflicts (see incident report 34-R, Aquatic Combat division) Only order of events can be confirmed with any real accuracy.
Event 1: Contact made with with hostiles. Data begins offsite transmission for safekeeping.
Event 2: X-Com contact team
arrives.
Commander of ground forces loudly announces that "Alien fucks" are about to wish "Their filthy mothers" had not been such "whores". Transcription not exact, but all surviving sources confirm the speech was "unspeakably vile".
Event 3: Contact team begins attack on hostiles, with the attached mobile armed platform isolating several armed alien life forms.
Event 4: Several hostiles begin behaving abnormally. Contact team apparently begins discussion of an "odd transmission" from Acheron salvage facility. Lt. Nocren is quoted as saying "Look. You can toss all the stars and bars on me you like. I'm still a grunt at heart, and that means I will never have any idea what the hell is going on. I just shoot things" Lt. Raneados responded with, according to multiple sources "Go outside then"
Event 5:X-Com agents EnglishBob, Bursar, and Nocren begin dispersal from craft. Contact made with further hostiles.
Why I fear the ocean.
I... too, was kidding.
Further contacts.
Discussion continues regarding lack of contact with Acheron. Acting director is described as a "Monday Morning quarterback, no question". "Glad he's not harassing us" Jocular comments continue.
One of the recruits mentions this would leave Commander Rankenphile in charge.
Jocular comments cease.
Event 7:
Latest contact is met.
High explosives are deployed.
Fail to terminate target.
Why I fear the ocean.
And this, people, is why you never buy surplus.
He fails to terminate any of the targets, despite their unarmed state.
Upon realizing this, he indulges in bitter mock laughter, and calls the dodging of the hostiles "Funny stuff, assholes". He further mentions he still is "near the top of the killboard", when up against aliens with a goal "beyond making me look bad".
Commander Rankenfile curses something called an "MC Disruptor" loudly at this time for being a "piece of shit" that "can't make a goddamn alien choke itself with its own fucking intestines like that's so much to ask"
Event 9:
Massive explosions.
Why I fear the ocean.
Meanwhile, EnglishBob and Bursar eliminate multiple contacts
Event 11:
Nocren fails to eliminate a contact at point blank range, begins cursing profusely.
Event 12: Alien, apparently due to outside prompting, attempts to strangle Lt. Nocren. Commander Rankenphile continues to swear, but in a more upbeat manner.
Why I fear the ocean.
Terror from the Deep was actually my first X-Com game. My friend lent it to me (I was, like, 12 at the time) and it didn't come with a manual so I pretty much muddled through. Approximately 3/4 of the way into the game things are going swimmingly when, hello, my base is being invaded.
I had left a few extremely under-equipped soldiers back at base because, heh, I didn't have enough room to bring them with me. Queue the most difficult, painful hour of my life as I guard their lives carefully and agonize over the toss of every grenade. Then, holding my breath as a squaddie runs out to pick up a fallen, stronger weapon to get an edge on the attackers.
I lived, but it was a clusterfuck so I essentially lost. But SO MUCH FUN, couldn't stop talking about it to my friends for days. Then they told me about ways to organize you base so invasions weren't such a big deal. Booo.