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what is the hardest thing you've ever had to do

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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    L|ama wrote: »
    I'm sometimes tempted to fake-come out just to see what peoples' reactions would be, but I am also aware that is a terrible terrible idea

    Something similar happened to me, except it was my roommate who got onto my email and sent a message to my entire contact list claiming to be gay.

    Most of my family figured it to be b.s., but my sister didn't and told my dad who was pretty upset about the whole fiasco.

    Oh, and it got sent to several of my previous employers. That was fun. He still refuses to this day to believe he could have gotten any serious sort of reprimand from it had I chosen to pursue legal action. Luckily for him, I didn't really care.
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Zonugal wrote: »
    I had to sit down with a substance abuse counselor this past year concerning my bosses fear that I may have growing signs of alcoholism.

    That was a fun meeting.

    They had nothing to worry about.

    The best part was explaining to the counselor what an Incredible Hulk was and her reaction of despair & revolution that I would drink them with such vigor.

    Ian tried getting me to stop drinking as much, I simply chuckled and changed the conversation. 8-)

    MereHappenstance on
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    ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    MereHappenstance we all know Jen is your 'beard'. Come on now...

    Zonugal on
    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
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    VALVEjunkieVALVEjunkie Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Ulises wrote: »
    i'm never telling my mum and dad i'm bisexual unless i have a long term male partner

    same deal with a lot of friends

    they'd all be just about fine with it, especially over time, but it's not something i'd do at this point

    yes these are my feelings as well

    plus, y'know I'm in hicksville, probably going to do it over the phone after I leave if it comes up(unless that is like a nono or something)

    VALVEjunkie on
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Zonugal wrote: »
    MereHappenstance we all know Jen is your 'beard'. Come on now...

    And now that she's several states away, I'm livin' the dream. Dudebutts as far as the eye can see.

    MereHappenstance on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Ulises wrote: »
    i'm never telling my mum and dad i'm bisexual unless i have a long term male partner

    same deal with a lot of friends

    they'd all be just about fine with it, especially over time, but it's not something i'd do at this point

    yes these are my feelings as well

    plus, y'know I'm in hicksville, probably going to do it over the phone after I leave if it comes up(unless that is like a nono or something)

    how could that be a nono

    there's not rules about this sort of thing

    and anyone who tries to insist to you that there is, that person is a self-absorbed asshole who thinks everyone should just do whatever they did or what they wish they did

    don't let anyone ever tell you that you "should" come out or that you are a coward for doing it some way over another way

    everyone's life is different

    nobody gets to decide for you how you want to deal with your own sexuality and how much, if anything, you want the people around you to know about it

    other people don't get to make an agenda out of it for you, and if they try, you tell em Pony said they're a cowardly faggot that needs to fight their own fucking battles.

    Pony on
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    Ulises wrote: »
    i'm never telling my mum and dad i'm bisexual unless i have a long term male partner

    same deal with a lot of friends

    they'd all be just about fine with it, especially over time, but it's not something i'd do at this point

    yes these are my feelings as well

    plus, y'know I'm in hicksville, probably going to do it over the phone after I leave if it comes up(unless that is like a nono or something)

    how could that be a nono

    there's not rules about this sort of thing

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbGuFn4nUqE

    MereHappenstance on
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    ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    Ulises wrote: »
    i'm never telling my mum and dad i'm bisexual unless i have a long term male partner

    same deal with a lot of friends

    they'd all be just about fine with it, especially over time, but it's not something i'd do at this point

    yes these are my feelings as well

    plus, y'know I'm in hicksville, probably going to do it over the phone after I leave if it comes up(unless that is like a nono or something)

    how could that be a nono

    there's not rules about this sort of thing

    and anyone who tries to insist to you that there is, that person is a self-absorbed asshole who thinks everyone should just do whatever they did or what they wish they did

    don't let anyone ever tell you that you "should" come out or that you are a coward for doing it some way over another way

    everyone's life is different

    nobody gets to decide for you how you want to deal with your own sexuality and how much, if anything, you want the people around you to know about it

    other people don't get to make an agenda out of it for you, and if they try, you tell em Pony said they're a cowardly faggot that needs to fight their own fucking battles.

    "Wait... A pony told you to tell us what?"

    Zonugal on
    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
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    MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Once I had to stop listening to guilty gear music. Another time I had to stop playing fallout games.

    Meissnerd on
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    VALVEjunkieVALVEjunkie Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    Ulises wrote: »
    i'm never telling my mum and dad i'm bisexual unless i have a long term male partner

    same deal with a lot of friends

    they'd all be just about fine with it, especially over time, but it's not something i'd do at this point

    yes these are my feelings as well

    plus, y'know I'm in hicksville, probably going to do it over the phone after I leave if it comes up(unless that is like a nono or something)

    how could that be a nono

    there's not rules about this sort of thing

    and anyone who tries to insist to you that there is, that person is a self-absorbed asshole who thinks everyone should just do whatever they did or what they wish they did

    don't let anyone ever tell you that you "should" come out or that you are a coward for doing it some way over another way

    everyone's life is different

    nobody gets to decide for you how you want to deal with your own sexuality and how much, if anything, you want the people around you to know about it

    other people don't get to make an agenda out of it for you, and if they try, you tell em Pony said they're a cowardly faggot that needs to fight their own fucking battles.

    I was talking about the over-the-phone part, but thank you :)(damn smug smiley)

    VALVEjunkie on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    drives me fucking bonkers when people in the LGBT "community" judge other queers for not being queer in a way they approve of.

    like if you don't make a big god damn agenda of your sexuality and are confrontational about it all the time, you're hurting the cause or something

    it's the internal struggle of any large minority group between the extremists and the moderates

    but since it's a minority group i ostensibly belong to, it bugs me personally more than a little bit

    this is totally putting aside the monosexism in the gay community which is a totally separate thing that pisses me off

    seriously though, if you are going to come out at all to your parents (if at all! if you don't ever enter into a long-term same-sex relationship you really never have to!) then you have the right to do it in a fashion of your choosing and i don't think it'd be fair of any person to think you were insufficiently confrontational about it.

    Pony on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    Ulises wrote: »
    i'm never telling my mum and dad i'm bisexual unless i have a long term male partner

    same deal with a lot of friends

    they'd all be just about fine with it, especially over time, but it's not something i'd do at this point

    yes these are my feelings as well

    plus, y'know I'm in hicksville, probably going to do it over the phone after I leave if it comes up(unless that is like a nono or something)

    how could that be a nono

    there's not rules about this sort of thing

    and anyone who tries to insist to you that there is, that person is a self-absorbed asshole who thinks everyone should just do whatever they did or what they wish they did

    don't let anyone ever tell you that you "should" come out or that you are a coward for doing it some way over another way

    everyone's life is different

    nobody gets to decide for you how you want to deal with your own sexuality and how much, if anything, you want the people around you to know about it

    other people don't get to make an agenda out of it for you, and if they try, you tell em Pony said they're a cowardly faggot that needs to fight their own fucking battles.

    I was talking about the over-the-phone part, but thank you :)(damn smug smiley)

    do it over the phone if it is what you are comfortable with doing

    do it by fuckin' text message if you feel it's right

    it's who you are. you don't owe them any sort of format or approach. however you choose to break it to them, that's your call, because it's your life and not their's so they don't really get to have a say in how you choose for them to find out.

    Pony on
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    ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    like if you don't make a big god damn agenda of your sexuality and are confrontational about it all the time, you're hurting the cause or something

    This can be said for any organization really and is the type of thinking I despise (the confrontational & agenda setting).

    Zonugal on
    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    If I ever have a gay child, I hope they tell me about it while in the middle of an American Gladiators competition.

    Like during the tennis ball cannon challenge. "Hey Dad! I'm gay!" "Really?" "Yeah!" "Okay, go on 3! 1, 2 3, go!"

    MereHappenstance on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    a buddy of mine told his parents he was gay as they were eating dinner

    he just sorta slipped it in there, like outright "Listen, I'm gay, and I really don't feel like hiding it anymore" and then continued eating it

    his mom was like "Oh, hon, that's okay, we love you, it's fine."

    his dad was like "I knew it."

    and just sorta smugly smiled at his own finely-tuned gaydar

    like he was happy that he was that clever he figured out his son was gay all on his own

    Pony on
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    VALVEjunkieVALVEjunkie Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    damn pony, thank you. but nobody said anything! I was just wondering if it was like a faux pas but apparently not!

    and yes, I will come out when I am damn well ready and it will not be a big deal and if somebody has a problem with that then screw them!

    E: oh, guess this was a little late oh well!

    VALVEjunkie on
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    UlisesUlises Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    pony has a gay person ever told you you were doing it wrong for taking the path of least resistance

    or are you raging at an imaginary entity

    Ulises on
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    FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    a buddy of mine told his parents he was gay as they were eating dinner

    he just sorta slipped it in there, like outright "Listen, I'm gay, and I really don't feel like hiding it anymore" and then continued eating it

    his mom was like "Oh, hon, that's okay, we love you, it's fine."

    his dad was like "I knew it."

    and just sorta smugly smiled at his own finely-tuned gaydar

    like he was happy that he was that clever he figured out his son was gay all on his own

    that is the kind of father I will be when I find out my son is gay

    which I wont be because I only plan on having daughters

    Franko on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Ulises wrote: »
    pony has a gay person ever told you you were doing it wrong for taking the path of least resistance

    or are you raging at an imaginary entity

    i have absolutely been told i am doing it wrong and i've interacted with quite a few "agenda-gays" who have been complete fucking assholes to me over my unwillingness to come out or my general avoidance of addressing my sexual orientation by name

    i have literally, and i am not kidding at all, been called an "uncle tom queer" to my face by a gay dude

    Pony on
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    FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    did you two settle your argument by having a Sex and the City trivia contest?

    Franko on
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    RubberACRubberAC Sidney BC!Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    the way i figure is, my parents will probably end up finding out im gay via facebook
    either pictures of me mackin with dudes, or something along those lines
    and that is like, my ideal way of it happening too

    RubberAC on
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    You're parents will call you up and be all "so you're gay?", "Oh yeah I didn't tell you guys? I could've sworn I mentioned it. So yeah, good times."

    MereHappenstance on
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    ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    If I was ever gay and came out to my parents I think my dad would self-combust in some nova of wild energy.

    Zonugal on
    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    gotta say the most surprising thing about being outed to my dad was how much of a personal insult he took it that i hadn't told him before and he basically found out because i made a mistake

    he was just like "what, did you think i was a homophobe? did you think i'd disown you? don't you know and trust me better than that?"

    i was like "dad there are lots of people i know who are tolerant of gay people but are monosexist assholes and it can totally shock you when you find out they are"

    then i had to explain monosexism to him because he had never heard of it

    then he got really angry that such a thing exists and got over some of the hurt and slight he felt

    Pony on
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    AriviaArivia I Like A Challenge Earth-1Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    because I just came out to my mother that I'm a tranny

    exact same thing for me

    she thought I had got a girl pregnant or killed a dude

    she was relieved

    hugs

    Arivia on
    huntresssig.jpg
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    ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Arivia wrote: »
    because I just came out to my mother that I'm a tranny

    exact same thing for me

    she thought I had got a girl pregnant or killed a dude

    she was relieved

    hugs

    Why bringing life into the world is equal to the taking of a life confuses me.

    Zonugal on
    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    My favorite part about the fake coming out was my sister calling up and saying "Oh, I totally figured you were the gay one and I totally support you!"

    I thought "wait, you thought I was the gay brother?"

    MereHappenstance on
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    VALVEjunkieVALVEjunkie Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    gotta say the most surprising thing about being outed to my dad was how much of a personal insult he took it that i hadn't told him before and he basically found out because i made a mistake

    he was just like "what, did you think i was a homophobe? did you think i'd disown you? don't you know and trust me better than that?"

    i was like "dad there are lots of people i know who are tolerant of gay people but are monosexist assholes and it can totally shock you when you find out they are"

    then i had to explain monosexism to him because he had never heard of it

    then he got really angry that such a thing exists and got over some of the hurt and slight he felt

    wait, what does monosexism mean?

    VALVEjunkie on
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    UlisesUlises Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    i'm guessing it means 'pick a side, nancy'

    Ulises on
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    MereHappenstanceMereHappenstance Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Arivia wrote: »
    because I just came out to my mother that I'm a tranny

    exact same thing for me

    she thought I had got a girl pregnant or killed a dude

    she was relieved

    hugs

    Why bringing life into the world is equal to the taking of a life confuses me.

    Either way, you're life is over bro. Amirite?

    MereHappenstance on
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    ZonugalZonugal (He/Him) The Holiday Armadillo I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Arivia wrote: »
    because I just came out to my mother that I'm a tranny

    exact same thing for me

    she thought I had got a girl pregnant or killed a dude

    she was relieved

    hugs

    Why bringing life into the world is equal to the taking of a life confuses me.

    Either way, you're life is over bro. Amirite?

    You are wrong duder.

    Zonugal on
    Ross-Geller-Prime-Sig-A.jpg
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    VALVEjunkieVALVEjunkie Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Ulises wrote: »
    i'm guessing it means 'pick a side, nancy'

    that is terrible!

    E: uncle tom queer, seriously? dude must have a stick up his ass(deeper than usual, I suppose)

    VALVEjunkie on
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    FrankoFranko Sometimes I really wish I had four feet so I could dance with myself to the drumbeat Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    gotta say the most surprising thing about being outed to my dad was how much of a personal insult he took it that i hadn't told him before and he basically found out because i made a mistake

    he was just like "what, did you think i was a homophobe? did you think i'd disown you? don't you know and trust me better than that?"

    i was like "dad there are lots of people i know who are tolerant of gay people but are monosexist assholes and it can totally shock you when you find out they are"

    then i had to explain monosexism to him because he had never heard of it

    then he got really angry that such a thing exists and got over some of the hurt and slight he felt

    wait, what does monosexism mean?

    It is what they used in the 80s before stereo and surroundsexism became popular

    Franko on
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    PonyPony Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Pony wrote: »
    gotta say the most surprising thing about being outed to my dad was how much of a personal insult he took it that i hadn't told him before and he basically found out because i made a mistake

    he was just like "what, did you think i was a homophobe? did you think i'd disown you? don't you know and trust me better than that?"

    i was like "dad there are lots of people i know who are tolerant of gay people but are monosexist assholes and it can totally shock you when you find out they are"

    then i had to explain monosexism to him because he had never heard of it

    then he got really angry that such a thing exists and got over some of the hurt and slight he felt

    wait, what does monosexism mean?

    discrimination against bisexuals

    specifically, the notion that no person is really bisexual, that every person is either homosexual or heterosexual (hence, mono, one) and that you need to be on one side of the fence or the other.

    this leads to outright bisexual erasure where people will claim, openly, that bisexuals are just "not picky" and are some kind of dangerously hedonistic libertines, or that they are "really" gay or straight and just haven't been honest with themselves as to which.

    this is also the train of thought that leads to bisexual stereotyping, especially in the gay community. homosexual discrimination against bisexuals (especially male homosexuals against male bisexuals) is incredibly and distressingly commonplace and the gay community often doesn't even try to hide it or conceal it as being anything less than ignorant hypocrisy.

    Pony on
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    MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    haha

    Meissnerd on
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    AriviaArivia I Like A Challenge Earth-1Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Zonugal wrote: »
    Arivia wrote: »
    because I just came out to my mother that I'm a tranny

    exact same thing for me

    she thought I had got a girl pregnant or killed a dude

    she was relieved

    hugs

    Why bringing life into the world is equal to the taking of a life confuses me.

    Either way, you're life is over bro. Amirite?

    any one of the three ways my life as a bro was over yes

    Arivia on
    huntresssig.jpg
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    UlisesUlises Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Koshian wrote: »
    it's mega fucking sucks that you have to effectively go back in the closet for the rest of your life to lead a happy existence though

    yeah, this is awful

    Ulises on
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    BucketmanBucketman Call me SkraggRegistered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Its the hardest thing I'll ever have to do, to look you in the eye and tell you I don't love you.

    But congrats Whippy.

    Bucketman on
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    AriviaArivia I Like A Challenge Earth-1Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Franko wrote: »
    did you two settle your argument by having a Sex and the City trivia contest?

    I have the cards for this should you need them

    Arivia on
    huntresssig.jpg
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    MeissnerdMeissnerd Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    The hardest thing I've had to do (and am still doing) is getting over my agoraphobia.

    Meissnerd on
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    DoobhDoobh She/Her, Ace Pan/Bisexual 8-) What's up, bootlickers?Registered User regular
    edited December 2010
    Hacksaw wrote: »
    Fiz wrote: »
    Once I had to watch Tube eat like 50 chicken wings at Hooters on 9/11
    I remember that night. "Comeuppance Day" he kept calling 9/11. That was a hard night.

    this is why I adore Tube

    Doobh on
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