The new forums will be named Coin Return (based on the most recent
vote)! You can check on the status and timeline of the transition to the new forums
here.
The Guiding Principles and New Rules
document is now in effect.
what is the hardest thing you've ever had to do
Posts
now, to put that into some kind of perspective, generally speaking if i know a person is a homophobe, i'm not going to draw that onto myself by confronting them with my sexual orientation and picking an argument or fight over it.
usually, i let it slide. depends on the situation and all that but rarely am i in a position where i feel it's worth it to try to confront someone's homophobic comments or views that aren't even being directed at me personally (becasue they don't even know it applies to me)
but
there's been many, many times in my life where i've been around friends and acquaintances and environments where people have openly expressed tolerance for gay people, and then my own sexual orientation comes out and suddenly everybody's not so cool
that fucking sucks on a level that is hard to express. when some big redneck stereotype is going on about dem dere faggots, you might be dismayed but you aren't shocked. when someone you think is a pretty liberal and open-minded person who has openly been accepting of gays suddenly turns out to be an ignorant monosexist, there's this incredible feeling of shock and betrayal that's really hard to equate to anything else.
Also people going "I wish you'd trusted me enough to tell me earlier"
welp uh trust me there's a lot of trust involved in telling you this right now if I'm not out to a lot of other people
does not compute
maybe this is one of those times where being raised on a religious black and white morality turned out in my favor, in a weird and twisted way
Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
it doesn't seem like the sort of thing that should happen!
it's hypocritical and illogical and crazy!
yet it does
there's a lot of homosexual hatred of bisexuals, for example, for a bunch of reasons
most of them having to do with stereotyping and bitterness
but even amongst straight people i know, i've encountered it
there was a woman who at one time was one of my best friends
then she found out
and over time the sort of comments and viewpoints she's expressed on the subject are just so passive aggressively judgmental that she's no longer one of my close friends and is really more of an acquaintence
hmmmmmm
e: the one relevant experience i've had in my life was when a friend came out gay to everybody, then began dating a girl a couple months later
he was lightly ridiculed in the old social circle for being indecisive and that was that
purely on the virtue of variety
Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
You are opening yourself to more options of love. This is not a bad thing.
that's why i get hit with it more often than conventional homophobia
because it's generally pretty obvious when a person is homophobic, they're pretty swift to comment on it if it comes up
so when i know that i am like "okay let's avoid this topic"
but with monosexism it can be sneaky because you can see someone express an open-minded view of sexuality and a statement of acceptance of gay people and just be like "oh okay that means you are probably cool with me too" and then it comes up and
nope
well stakes are wooden
so it works
it would just hurt
a lot
also you'd better not be a vegan vampire or an Edward Cullen or whatever
@Zonugal: pony hates hedonism it is a thing
My parents think I'm gay because I haven't had a girlfriend in over a year. When really I'm just fat.
Haha that would bring us to odds because I'm a big supporter of it.
i got so city girl on you
i went
so crazy i didn't know what to do
the root issue of monosexism is, in my observation, the perception by monosexists that bisexuals are intrinsically incapable of long-term monogamy.
it's not the idea of a person being potentially capable of being attracted to either sex that bugs people, it's this idea that somehow a person who is bisexual will inevitably have an urge for sex with someone of a different gender to the person they are in a relationship with and there's no way a monogamous relationship can truly satisfy them in the long-term.
this idea is fucking retarded. Maybe there are bisexual people it is true of, but i've never met them and they sure as fuck don't represent me.
it is by far the most offensive idea a person can present to me on the subject and most people don't even realize how offensive it is
infuriating.
hifive
hedonism and incredible hulks erryday
uh excuse me, go fuck yourself
don't fucking express whatever you fucking think my opinion is on my behalf in order to somehow turn people against me
go back to D&D with your bullshit, please.
it's like you want to feel persecuted by something
this is re: monosexism vs the thing pony is
but okay!
and yes koshi it is terrible
something that makes me mad(?) is the notion that bisexuals are lucky because they have double the chances of finding someone
it just doesn't sit right with me for some reason but I'm not sure why
E: not that I'm saying that's what you're saying or anything, it just made me remember is all
they're probably secretly jealous of bi people because they get to have it all.
I think the fair majority of American men are furries because after watching Space Jam who wouldn't tap Lola Bunny?
I mean come on!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOdWxf1tRmI
Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
Generally speaking, I don't!
It's actually remarkably easy to avoid any discussion at all of one's sexual orientation if it doesn't come up in conversation.
However, there are times when I will tell anecdotes
everyone knows how much I love a good anecdote
and there are some of those anecdotes that involve times when i was dating dudes
now, I sometimes am able to tell the story while playing the "pronoun game" but sometimes it is also inevitable.
alternately, there are times when sexual orientation and sexuality is the conversation topic, especially amongst close friends you trust and all that
so, from time to time, it does come up, and unless i want to be deliberately and consciously avoidant of the subject or not participate in the conversation, i end up disclosing it
thaaaat said
i've become so accustomed to things like "pronoun games" and avoid labelling that
well
just take a look over the last couple pages and count the number of times i actually said what my sexuality is instead of just inferring or implying it.
it's a habit i have to make a choice to break.
me
owai not a man
nvm
okay fuck you man
just
fuck you, alright
i can't really have a mature conversation with you on the subject when this is your approach.
yeah, that's not my thought process at all
mostly, it's about people appreciating a wider variety of aesthetics than I can
Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
All worked out well though in the end. And im pretty grateful its the hardest thing ive had to do.
I don't think people are intolerant of bisexuality in the same way you see intolerance of transgendered or homosexual people though, unless they are all of these things, in which case they're just intolerant of everything. "Monosexism" isn't a belief people are going to have much conviction in.
yeah, I had to go through something like this years back
still getting over it- which bothers the hell out of me because it's been so long, and it's screwing with my ability to get intimate with other people
hugs, duder
Twitch (I stream most days of the week)
Twitter (mean leftist discourse)
but yes everyone is cuuuuuuuuuute~ (that means you lurker post post post)